One Thing Women Don’t Know … Women

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I’ve always had a few females friends. I used to think they were good resources for back when I was socially awkward and lacked the ability to talk to women (sadly … this wasn’t that long ago). I figured “girls know what other girls like. They will lead me out of this awkward phase”. Man … I was kidding my self.

Some women nowadays are willing to admit that they don’t know what they want. Others, however, hold onto the belief that they know exactly what they want from men, life, and their career … but its interesting how so many of their choices seem to follow some different logic that they just … can’t explain. When it comes to men, this often becomes glaringly true.

- How often does a female tell you they want a guy who will provide and take care of her … yet every guy who does is labeled as soft and its the jobless “loser” thats beating it up on the nightly?
- How often does a girl tell you she needs a committed boyfriend who will rub her feet at night .. yet the guy she is currently “seeing” is never seen with her during the day, has never met her friends or family, and has managed to keep his place of residence a secret for 6 months?
- How many girls out there claim they want to be held at night and whispered sweet words to … yet her current “partner” pulls her hair, goes at her with the furuosity of a wild animal, and then promptly falls alseep (or leaves) after he “gets his”?

If there is one thing I have truly learned in my relatively short time on this earth is one thing … guys who get girls know girls … period.

They know what they really want, what they really want to hear, and what kind of personality they are actually attracted to … thats why they get as many girls as they do. No one understands the female psyche better than the “player”. He is skilled at translating the words a girl tells him … able to peel back the layers of BS and decipher the true meaning in her words.

There is one thing that easily proves this. Almost any girl will attest to one simple fact … any guy who gives her everything she “wants” is not attractive. This guy is soft, a punk, to eager to please, or a million other things. The one thing he is not … is her man! (sidenote: I did watch “I Love New York 2″ and she did pick the true ‘bitch’ of the bunch … but that chick is nuts … and she really was in love with the one guy who wouldn’t give her an inch).

I will say this … something like that could be argued for men … but I feel like its not that hard to figure out what we want. I mean … there is like 2 things I can think of at the most (prize to the person who guesses right)! What we want is obvious … how to keep us from getting bored or tired … well … that is the million dollar question.

So I know some female is going to tell me how she is the exception, about how she is different … and please … do tell. But I know there is plenty of guys who agrees with me!

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From Our Partners

  • http://www.antidater.blogspot.com the antidater

    Yessir! You hit the nail on the head. Nice guys really do finish last. Cat string theory: give a cat a ball of yarn and it quickly becomes bored but taunt the kitty with the ball of yarn and its sole goal in life becomes getting that ball of yarn. An unmet desire stirs need.

    ~antidater

  • Minnie

    Sadly, I have to agree with you SBM and I'm a woman. I've definitely noticed that as me and my friends have gotten older what we say we want and what we actually go for has come to be true in many cases, but i still have many a friend who "wants a good man" and then settles for the obvious loser. I think some girls are really scared to be alone so they are quick to settle in these bad situations. I rarely hear men worry about being alone and don't usually see my guy friends settle.

  • Tiffany In Houston

    Women who don't know women are women who don't know themselves. I was like them too. Experience and maturity tend to sharpen your instincts and you learn to trust yourself.

    The beauty of being almost 35 is that you come into your own and are more comfortable in your own skin.

    Nice blog, I'll be back.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org SBM

    Tiffany: Thanks. I will admit, I do find women exhibit the "Fine Wine" effect … they get better with age. Most of my friends are in the same age range and since I almost exclusively date older women … I really do agree with your comment.

    I'm surprised I got women to feel me on this. I thought it would be the true hail of comebacks.

  • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Come Back Girl

    I think this would be a great roundtable discussion video tapped for youtube or something. I agree with Minnie what we want and what we say we want-totally different. I think women like to be just as challenged as the Man. I want my relationships just as interesting and hate being bored too (I mean I am the poster girl for A.D.D.)..

    But intereseting and exciting should not translate into mistreatment. But people will only treat you how you've directed them to treat you. its a balance. And it should also be a journey in self-discovery. I've learned so much about myself in this last relationship-I feel like I could write a damn book. But who would buy it?

  • http://idkmynameismikki.wordpress.com mikki

    Yep I agree with the comment that talked about a woman being lonely, even at 25 I still worry about that. I hear a lot of people say wait til your older you will understand, and honestly I have heard it so much i really can't wait til the day, but one thing I wonder about getting older is actually settling for something that ain't good, i mean knowing what you want is one thing but getting it at 40 is another lol with stuff starting to sag and hang is another lol.

  • http://mrslish.wordpress.com Mr Slish

    You can a give a woman the best of both worlds..Its not the bad boy a woman is attracted to its confidence. Nice guys lack that they always second guess themselves. Going on a first date and asking a young lady " Well..What do you feel like doing" is a definite deal breaker. Woman want to be lead that's the reason why so many of them are attrected to assholes..What nice guys need to learn is to say what they do and do what they say…Actions always speak louder than words any day of the week…

  • http://www.readingwritingblogging.blogspot.com mizrepresent

    I have to agree with Slish on this…we don't want something so easy, that it seems not worth having…we don't want a pushover, we want a man to be a man, to lead, to be strong, and loving, a quiet combo…as a older women i have no qualms with expressing my wants and needs…i won't settle, so if that means some time alone…fine. Forty can be be fine as wine, all the time, what we may lose in gravity we've gained in wisdom.

  • Mikki

    mizrepresent: Very nicely put *Smiles*

    mr slish: you are dead on.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org SBM

    As has happened before, the comments here is inspiring my next post. Oddly enough, figuring out what women want has never seemed that difficult to me. And as I hear guys complain that they don't know what it is … I almost want to laugh … as its so obvious.

    And thank you Mr. Slish … a guy … for being one of the first to allude to the things women want.

  • tone

    i agree all woman today do not know what they want in life. even if they had road map to tall them want they what. i trust me i had woman like that bitch is crazy. give them dick for to long she cut that shit down to one time a week because her pussy hurt. need time to get better for another beating. woman are very happy