Freaks, Hoes, and Freaky Hoes …

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super-freak

Something I have noticed for years and it has annoyed me for all of those years.  Two terms that are often used interchangeably … when they really speak to two different aspects of sexuality.

I am here to discuss the difference between a (sexual) freak … and a hoe.

*Flashback*

SBM: Man … did you ever mess with that chic you met at the club last week?  She was phat!
Friend: Yeah … I hit her up last week.  And you know … we got up …
SBM: Really?  Man …
Friend: Yeah man … she was a freak!
SBM: Damn … she was doing some crazy stuff of a random club beat?
Friend: Naw … I mean she let me hit after no time.  She seems like she does it at least once a month from talking to her.
SBM: So you mean she is a hoe.
Friend: Hoe … freak … whatever.
SBM: *shakes head slowly* Man … they aren’t the same. Don’t you know the difference?
Friend: *puzzled look*

Yes people … a freak is not a hoe … and a hoe is not a freak.  A hoe can be a freak … and a freak can be a hoe … or someone could be neither … but they could also be both confused yet?

Freak
A sexually liberal individual.  Someone who is willing and eager to try and do all the things that you were told not to do.  The type of things involving three people, midgets, toys, and exposure to people in public.  She is comfortable with their body and their sexuality and not willing to let their inhibitions stop them.

Hoe
A person of loose sexual nature.  They have had a lot of sexual partners … are not very discerning in who they sleep with … and may very well have earned a reputation for their willingness to sleep with someone.  They are known as women of a “loose nature”.

Got it?

Hoes, whores, sluts … that’s the negative one.  As a guy (or girl) you don’t want one of them.  They might make a good JO (Jump Off) or one night stand temporary situation … but you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife.  Reformed hoes are completely different situation … because (in some cases) the past is just that … the past … but Project Pat said it best “Don’t save her … she don’t wanna be saved.”  These are the ones you pass around to your friends afterward …

Freaks, Freaklinks, Liberal in the bed … those are prized finds.  They are the ones that are going to swallow, bring in a friend, hang upside down from the ceiling fan, pull out handcuffs … and then wake you up in the morning asking for more.  Then she will give you that on the road “attention” while driving her to breakfast … and then propose a little bathroom desert after finishing off her eggs.  No hole is off limits, no idea is too weird.

Now … not every freak is good for ya.  You have your freak hoes … which are the ones to watch out for.  A combination of both … someone who is willing to do whatever … and someone who will do whoever.  Not only has she slept with all of your friends, their friends, and that homeless guy who dances on the corner for change … but she has also been violated by these random people in ways that would make Jenna Jameson cringe.  Example … a girl who goes to the club with lube in her purse looking to leave with a stranger (true story).

But … you do have Good Freaks.  The ones who are freaks only for their man.  Some of the crazier sexual acts require a lot of trust (who wants to be handcuffed and left for dead because you said something wrong … or one poorly planned back flip can spell ruin for you special guy) … so they know not to share their special talents with just anyone.  This is the girl you take home to meet mom … and then tell dad about.

And while these terms essentially mean the same thing for man or women … “nasty” is the proper male replacement for freak … and “he-slut” or “man-whore” is the proper replacement for hoe.

So go forth good people … educate the masses.  Don’t let the good name of “Freak” be bestowed upon an undeserving hoe.  Lets make it mean something again!!!

Agree with the definitions?  What do you need in your life, a hoe, freak, freak hoe … or just plane?  For the women … which label defines you?  What about half-breeds?  Reformed hoes … freaks with hoe tendencies … psuedo-freaks?

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From Our Partners

  • Mr.FAQs

    Don't knw if the terms could have been defined any better.

    "Let's make it mean something again" – true story

  • http://loveandnappyness.blogspot.com loveandnappyness

    mmm i have an amendment.

    if you sleep with a hoe. you are a hoe. its contagious. literally. done deal, i don't want it.

  • http://sobhanasatya.blogspot.com Satya

    <Agrees with definitions. I agree with Akua to some degree there are things I want to try but I think I should save some things to experience only with my husband or at least fiance… I know old school but I think some things are only for a hubby or potentiaL life partner.

  • Akua

    I agree some women are one, the other or both.

    and trust is paramount. there are things I want 2 try but I don’t trust any man with my body enough 2 let him go there.

  • http://www.adventuresindivorce.blogspot.com Anesidora

    I have been saying this for YEARS! Case in point: My (ex) best friend from HS slept with EVERYBODY….her number was well upward of 50 before we were 24. She'd have sex with a guy because he smelled good. Yet when I'd talk about things I was into sexually with my husband (and at that point the only man I'd ever had sex with) she wrinkled up her nose like "ew". I DEFINITELY fall into the freak/free-spirit category and there is DEFINITELY a difference. I like what I like, but I don't like it with everyone. Lucky is the person who gets to experience the magic.

  • http://singlesisterspeak.wordpress.com Jac

    Hmmm…definitions are good. Let's see…I am sure I fall into one of these categories but unless you're my man (long-standing friend) ain't no way you're going to find out anything…about just how far I'm willing to go…which for you nasties here…might not be far enough :-D

  • http://www.singlesisterspeak.wordpress.com Nicki Sunshine

    I think your definitions are perfect.

    I have freakish thoughts but it has to be a special man that can make me feel comfortable enough to pull them out…. so far, none of them have. I've done some freakish things but I wasn't totally comfortable with it…

    I'm lying… I've had some public action with two men. LOL.

  • http://www.threewaystotakeit.com/ Slim Jackson

    @Anesidora "her number was well upward of 50 before we were 24."

    That's really awful and disgusting and exactly what I fear as a man. I do not want that chick/hoe.lol.

  • CPT Callamity

    Let's see….

    I'm a "freak" and I need a freak in my life.
    Ho-hum sex is bad for my Adult ADD. Plus the damage from the pron has already been done.

    I don't fade hoes. Hoes are like disposable butt wipes as opposed to a soft washcloth and soap. Use once, do not dry, discard in proper receptacle. Now I know some of the ladies despise hoes, but I've made peace with the fact that hoes are essential in our humanly ecosystem.

  • No More Heroes

    "I’ve made peace with the fact that hoes are essential in our humanly ecosystem."

    Yep, there's a time and a place for everyone, including hoes.

  • http://maddsexycool.wordpress.com Reign

    I'm a freak, ratio non-existent. Like CPT, I need a freak in my life as well.

  • http://sleep-is-the-cousin-of-death.blogspot.com Tunde

    I can't speak for all men, but I definitely want a freak in my life. As far as sex is concerned I need someone who is compatible in my needs and desires. As far as hoes, sometimes you may not really know. You sometimes run across the hoe in hiding; who have repressed their inner hoe. You just have to hope thats not what you're dealing with.

  • Peyso

    This post is right on. I would like to add that in my experiences that the hoe that is a freak is usually the jawn that is also using you for sex, while the hoe that is only a hoe is being used for sex. Thats my experiences

  • http://www.sistersoundoff.blogspot.com Cheekie

    There are people who think the terms "freak" and "hoe" are interchangeable? They never heard of the phrase "I want a lady in the street and a freak in the bed"? How could the word "hoe" possibly fit into that statement? Anyhow…

    A little, tiny rant. I'm one of those fem-Nazis socially aware women that don't call men who are hoes "man-whore" or qualify any of those other descriptions that are supposedly only for women. A hoe is a hoe. Don't need to be the owner of a vagine to be one. No need for qualifiers. If a man is a hoe, he is a hoe. No hyphens allowed. Just a little pet peeve of mine. Trying to start a revolution and some ish.

    Also, only that special someone can be rewarded with Freaky Cheekie.

  • http://www.thejadednyer.net The Jaded NYer

    I mad you devoted a whole post to DEFINING hos and freaks, and subsequent combinations thereof…smh…LOL

    but I do agree: please don't confuse a freak with a ho and vice versa. it's the difference between an awesome story to tell your boys or a not so awesome story to tell the nurse at the free clinic.

    I'm just sayin…

  • http://thereal7.blogspot.com Britt

    Agreed.

  • http://dcdatingadventures.blogspot.com/ DC Dating Diva

    Embracing the name…the first-time, I was called a freak I was F'n mad…dude didn't mean it in a Bad way, but the word had been PASSED around so loosely, that it DID mean hoe to me…but now I Embrace my Freaky side, I KNOW I can put it down in the bed-room!!! Although not everything is a go, I will out it down for the SO. Still don't call me a Freak… just say…."damn baby, you're the shit"… then hand me my Oscar

  • 100%Redbone

    Absolute truth! A friend once told me, "Everyone has an "F" on their chest, it just takes the right person to help them find it" Then he flipped me :)I came up like that girl in Cam'ron's "Oh Boy" video, "I found it!"

  • http://blackgirlunlost.blogspot.com Jubilance

    I think your definitions are spot on.

    My only issue is the criteria folks use to through the "hoe" label on a woman…which always boils down to a numbers game. I'm not comfy with telling someone how many sexual partners is too many for them. I think a real test of a hoe is someone who is willing to do with anyone or appears to have no standard. You could hump only a couple of guys but if they are nasty scrubs I'mma be looking at you sideways and wondering about you.

  • http://www.thecomebackgirl.com The Comeback Girl

    "I like what I like, but I don’t like it with everyone. Lucky is the person who gets to experience the magic."

    this is like poetry…and so dayum true…some people can;t even turn that button on for me..one i seriously might hurt.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org SBM

    I think I should add grades of levels for each term. Then you can tell another person "She's a H1F5" … meaning she is kinda loose … but a super freak.

    @Jubilance: I knew at some point today the question of what makes a hoe a hoe would come up. I think that is going to be another post for another day … but I think we all truly know a how when we see them.

  • http://blackgirlunlost.blogspot.com Jubilance

    @SBM: so basically its like porn – you may not be able to define it but dammit you know it when you see it?

    I'll take that.

  • http://www.creative1k.blogspot.com Creative1k

    @ CPT Calamity-Hoes are like disposable butt wipes as opposed to a soft washcloth and soap.
    Classic, LMAO

    From several past conversations with my best male friends and kinfolk, this is definitely on point.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org SBM

    @Jubilance: Exactly … Every guy is born with the hoe-dar chip. Keeps us out of trouble … or helps us get into it.

    Simps happen when the chip malfunctions … amongst other things.

  • http://rantsofawildchild.wordpress.com ladebelle

    I'm literally laffing my ass off at this (while listening to jaime foxx's freak in me)

    I love u for this post because this shit iasi tru!!! these tterms are not to be used interchangeably…

    ok… what do I want/need? a "nasty" dude…

    what am I? this lade will never tell…

    great post

    • Johnnybeedancy

      what you need is someone like me down for what ever.

    • Tony

      Call me now

  • :)

    love the definitions and thank you for taking the time to explain to those who really don’t get it! I can relate with one of the other commenters who said her “ho” friend turned her nose up at her sexual exploits…my number is lower than anyone I know that’s my age but I think I’ve done more than any of my other friends so there’s def a difference. Have a good day :)

  • http://www.awesomelyluvvie.com Luvvie

    If this post was a man, he'd GET IT in unholy ways (after he has proven himself worthy. Thats how much it was on point. ;-)

  • http://www.threewaystotakeit.com Sowhatiff Jenkins

    I was cracking up reading this entry! I agree with the definitions you put forth…

    LOL@ bringing the freak home to mom and telling dad about her…

  • http://rantsofawildchild.wordpress.com ladebelle

    @luvvie… yes!!! throw ur virtual panties!!

  • Pingback: Coming to Terms « Single Sisters Speak Out

  • HarlemsOwn

    Woman, you have to be a freak with your man. It is essential. But you can not have a hoe background. thats not acceptable.

  • lil v.

    I Love dat wanna just fuck all day

  • http://undressingher.com/ undressingHER

    I agree 100%. I've met hoes, in the fact that they will fuck anybody quite easily, that weren't freaks at all. They just did regular sexual stuff. They weren't bending over backwards or anything like that.

  • Pingback: 8 Signs She Might Be a Hoe … 2009 edition – Single Black Male

  • IceQueen

    Don’t let the good name of “Freak” be bestowed upon an undeserving hoe

    Co-sign and cosign again!

  • Lisa

    Thanks so much for this post! Always struggled with the difference.

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  • enceenico

    This article is very unconvincing. The way you explained “freaks” do… that’s what sluts/whores/hoes do. Therefore ….. They ARE the same thing. Don’t kid yourself.

  • enceenico

    This article is very unconvincing. The things you say “freaks” are exactly what sluts and whores do. Therefore …THEY ARE THE SAME. Don’t kid yourself.

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