…you’re so Anne Frank
My whole life I’ve always been the type of guy who likes Plain Jane. In school everyone would like the “prettiest” girl in school. I was looking for the one who was cute on the low. That’s just how I am. I don’t like a lot of attention in a woman. When I first saw Boomerang, although I would agree that Robin Givens looks better than Halle in this movie, I wanted Halle. Halle was down to earth, but cute as a button. I like a girl who is easy like Sunday morning.
When I was younger and frequenting nightclubs and such. Just to let you guys in on a secret. It got to the point that I didn’t even wait in line at Love. I was there every Friday for two years. And I made my way to the Velvet Room each time and that’s where you could meet most of the celebrities, if they weren’t on stage. Anyway, from my weekly table at Love I could see the stage where they would always bring the flyest girls in the club on stage. I could gaze out and see the baddest one in the club, usually with the popping lip gloss, perfect outfit, and every guy in the club was thinking they’d really like to take her to the Diner after the club. Well, most guys usually just think about that, I’m the type of person who does that. And so I’d approach and I’d usually make like a DJ Khaled song and win. But through time and experience I learned something, those women love the spotlight, you can’t ask them to love you, because they love them some them.
It didn’t take me long to go back to my proven ways, I would stop going for the girl everyone else wanted and go for the quiet girl who is politely sitting by herself or with a group of divas, but she just wants to blend in. Not obsessed with being the topic of discussion.
I like the simple things in life. I like going out to eat, (I’m actually cinephobic, I’m explain this in another post), I like playing pool, I like watching the Laker game, and I enjoy sex at halftime. I like girls who don’t take an hour to figure out what they want to wear to Popeyes. I like Popeyes. I like girls who eat with their hands. I like girls who look in the mirror and say, “Eff it, I’m just going to the store.” I like when I say, “Baby run.” And you know what? She can run. “Teach your girl how to run.” – Richard Pryor. I like a girl who appreciates a nap. I like that she can wear heels, but I also like that she looks great in a jean skirt and some pumas. (Okay, so random note, I used to be a groupie. LOL. I used to only date female athletes. Something about those sexy backs and shoulders got to me.) I love women in a wife beater, some jogging pants and a pair of Air Max 95s or even the Nike flip flops. #dontjudgeme. I think what I’m trying to say is I just appreciate the simple things in life so much more.
I like it when a girl can hold conversation with the fellas without flirting. Seriously, I get off to my chick coming into a Kobe vs. LeBron argument like a gang buster and shutting down any LeBron talk. Kobe is way better. That’s why she is rocking the Laker jersey dress jumpoff at every game. I like that she buys beer, even if she doesn’t drink it. I like that she doesn’t complain when she finds out that I’m probably going to finish this bottle of Henny tonight. She’s just along for the ride and happy to be there.
Now don’t get me wrong, I like that when she wants to dial it up she can. But today’s post was about loving the simple things that women do. A lot of women are convinced that men want to date Beyonce, um actually not. She’s doing too much. I wish she would go sit her Bodied body down and stop talking on the Telephone when driving. Case in point, Tamia still beats Beyonce in a taste test of 9 out of 10 men. Need another point, ask most men who their favorite member of TLC was. The majority will say Chili, until this recent reality show failure. The next largest group will say Left Eye, but they realized they’d end up with Chili after Left Eye burned down Andre’s crib and it was on MTV. T-Boz ain’t get no love, she was all up in the front and stuff. I just didn’t want another post to go up and I didn’t let you guys know that us men appreciate the simple things in life.
Dr. J wants to know if you would like to hit the attic to hide out for bout two weeks…
I like this post….reminds me of that Drake line "Sweat pants, hair tied, chilling with no make up on." Always good to be reminded that men appreciate real, natural, down to earth women.
That is hands down my fav line that he has even given.
Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany
Fierce avatar Silent Scorpion! *two thumbs up and a Z formation"
I appreciate this post! While It is nice to get attention when you're coifed and glamorous it's nice to know there are guys that appreciate the simple things.
Dang it, your name is so familiar that I'm not sure if you're a new poster or not. If so, welcome. If not, I apologize.
hehehe no i'm not new. But, thanks. Someone on VSB had the same handle and I blew a little smoke up her screen
I am really digging this post. I'm always (okay, not always) reading on here about y'all loving women rocking the 4" heels, etc. I stay out of those conversations because 7 times out of ten, I'm the simple girl in a sea of flashy ones. Don't get me wrong, I do what I do when I do it, but for the most part I'm dressed simple with simple makeup (if I am even wearing makeup at all). I'm also pretty much always the one trying to stay in the cut at the club, I get enough attention without being the one in the middle of the dance floor with my taco hanging out.
I effin LOVED this post! Us plain janes don't always get that much love! Nike flip flops are a WIN! I swear by them, I wear them all the time! I don't do the basketball talk but would be glad to sit w/ my man during the game & listen to him have the convo. I love man who's passionate about things! Jeans & a tshirt w/ flip flops are my ideal outfit. I don't wear sneakers though (I have my reasons). My ideal time is spent in a barnes & nobles cafe drinking an iced chai latte, writing or reading!
I just have to say this post is just so full of win again! #shoutout to you!
I don't do much of the basketball talk either, but it is sexy to see men get in on those conversations (see 3ways yesterday (today) before CHeeKz messed it all up). I'll bust in when it's something I'm passionate about though, and I can do so without flirting.
Dr. J, you did good with this post, you're might be getting some e-panties thrown tomorrow. LOL
oh yea, let the convo be about something i'm interested in and i'm all in! I read the post yesterday but when i read it, there weren't any comments yet! Passionate men make e-panties come off! lol!
Oh yea, i'm a beer drinker so it wouldn't be uncommon to find in my fridge, #allimportsnodomestics, my favs are Coronas & Shocktops & i can hook up a mean drink! Bartending certification #FTW!
"Oh yea, i’m a beer drinker so it wouldn’t be uncommon to find in my fridge, #allimportsnodomestics, my favs are Coronas & Shocktops & i can hook up a mean drink! Bartending certification #FTW!"
- We may have to revoke your beer drinker's card. Among your favorite's is Corona's? The same beer that I know as messican pisss. And how can you knock domestics in America? The home of Sam Adams, Blue Moons, Brooklyn Lagers and a million microbreweries?
We need to have a sbm.org at a biergarten in the city (My 2 favorites are actually in BK and in Queens). Show you sonme good beers!
@PEYSO
You have to add a little tequlia and lime to your corona. Makes it so much better.
Funny you mention biergarten, I may be there on Saturday. (Queens location.)
In DC, we have RFD and Brickskeller, similar in fashion.
A woman who order Sam Adams is a woman after my heart. Even though i'm an Orioles fan, I love me some Boston Red Sox female fans… they love some Sam Adams.
One of my boys continues to drink Blue Moon, now that's a girly man for you. "You can't drink no beer with an orange in it! Let me get 6 Guinesses and a Blue Moon. No my girlfriend is not in the bathroom, he's standing right here."
I've never heard of beirgartens…i may have to go there some time. I don't always drink beer though, i don't even drink often enough but when the spirit moves me, i will have one. I don't like Brooklyn Lager, i tried it once & it just wasn't hitting…i was told its an acquired taste though. I went to a bar in the city that had shock top on tap…i was super excited but if you ask me where it is, i couldn't tell you since i went with a friend of mine & one of his old coworkers.
I don't do tequila (bad experience) but i generally add grenadine to mine. Another way i've seen people drink it is with salt & lemon. Its weird how i like coronas so much but i do!
I like Guiness…haven't had it in a while. It takes forever to get it from the tap, you can make at least one other mixed drink then go back to it!
If there is an SBM.org get together at beirgartens, let me know…i'm in Brooklyn…i have no issue with trying something new.
Awesome post.
I can def co-sign on everything in this post…..I guess that's why I dig it so much.
*Stands up and starts clapping "encore Monsieur J encore, bravo, bravo"*
I like the fact that you appreciate all the simple things in a woman.
I love to dress up, I'm a girlie girl, but #iConfess I only wear make up when going out or if I'm having a major shoot, other than that, I'm always Au natural.
You hit the nail right on the head on this one… I am an introvert and at the same time I can be an extrovert as well, but lately if I'm boo'd up, a good rivalry game on tv *Go Boston!!*, playing bones and having some drinks is much more fulfilling than a night out and about bar hopping…
Darn! I just realized with my own post how much I've grown up lol before, that up there that I just wrote would be a complete no-no.
Back in the day (2-4 yrs ago) if I wasn't out and about hitting the town with the boo our doing something other than being at home it was a failed situationship simple as that…
awww… i'm a tomboy first.. and a girly girl WAY last..
that Pumas line got me.. because that's the only sneaker i talk about.. (i'm jamaican, don't judge me)
the only thing i really put on my lips is Vaseline (cherry) and feel that i'm my s*xiest when i just got in a good workout (literally and figuratively)..
thank you for this post J.. it validates us simple ones.. although in miami, that ish don't go over so well..
#imjustsayin
We are also "here". It's so great to see that I'm not the only female that is more tom-boyish, yet still feminine. I don't know anyone like me in real life. Alright, I'm done with my paper and off to bed.
The best females are the “Tom-Boyish yet feminine” …Men want females we can have fun with.. a best friend…not someone who is high strung and scary all the time…and acting like it is beneath them to do things that men may like to do..
IF you can find that perfect balance in a female that rocks her Air Max 90′s, K-swiss Classics, Nautica sweats…etc.. hell even throws a Tim on from time to time…along with the 4 inch stilletos, freak um dresses…its the best of both worlds! IMO
now I do keep me a pair of wheat timbs, even though I now live in FL and I have no reason to wear em. lol
Girl you are speaking the truth about MIA thats why I want to move majority of these men are so superficial I love to look nice and all that but sometimes a sista just want to chill with a black fitted v-neck jeans and some chucks on ! Ya DIG!
I can't stand Miami.. maybe it's cuz i've been here for almost 30 years.. but the dudes think it's alright to look like "who shot ya (no Jay-Z)" and still expect the woman to be put together.. HEAD TO TOE!!
they think that they can look like Rick Ross (no shot) and expect to get a woman that looks like she was in the Rick Ross video..
(note to dude: Rick Ross had to PAY those girls to be in his video)
i really do wanna put on my cardo shorts and my Pumas and just go… it's VERY superficial out here.. i hear L.A. is worse, but DANG!
LMAO girl you hit it right on the head thats why after I finish school relocating is in the works! They can have it Im good!
Hi Sane!! Hi everyone else!! ^_^
Okay. This post was iight…
I'm kidding… You know what you're doing when you write these posts. I loved it. There's so much about natural beauty that I feel SHOULD be appreciated more. People are caking on the makeup lately and that shxt is NOT cute boo.
@Sane he's definitely getting some e-panties. Not that I'm saying I'm throwing em.. 0:-)
And I also agree with the heels comment Sane. I stay out of those heel convos. But when it's time to step out, I do what I can. I wouldn't call myself "simple" but I'm so far from complicated and extra, I might as well be. I've tried make up (mascara, foundation) and ehh, not for me. My skin's been one of the lucky types to go long without it. ^_^ yay
But anywho, great post Sir.
You and I are pretty much "here" (doing the pointing at eyes thingy here).
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't tempted to throw some e-panties, or maybe half a pair (I guess the only way you could get half a pair is if they're edible)*.
*It's late, I'm not at 100% right now, hence the nonsensical babbling.
Love this! I'm glad somebody likes the girls who keep it lowkey or simple. As the designated "good girl" in my crew, that's usually me, lol. I watch sports and talk sports (Lakers in 7), I refuse to rock heels everywhere i go (they're uncomfortable, why am I making myself uncomfortable just to run to the store?), I'm the shyest, and I've got the most low maintenance hair in the group *swings locs*. It's always nice to encounter men who can appreciate you even when you're not in diva mode.
I'm like this with guys. I don't really go for men that showboat and stunt all the time. That's fine for celeb crushes but for a guy that I actually want to be with? Naw, homie, I'm cool.It's okay to be life of the party sometimes but every time? That's gotta be exhausting. Just carry yourself well and have a good time. Turn it up when you need to and turn it down when you don't.
I tend to not fall for the superfine or uberpopular dudes. I usually go for what i like to call "square boys" lol (not the pocket protector, naive, mama's boy kinda square boys . . . just regular guys). They may be just as or more attractive or ambitious but they're not vying for the spotlight (or atleast not basking in it). I'm not always checking for him in the beginning b/c he may not have caught my eye right away because he probably wasn't trying to drown me in swag or game. It's the little things about him and little things that he does that get my attention and make me fall for him.
AMEN AMEN AMEN I CO SIGN 100% I cant stand the flashy type dude totally turn OFF!
Hi, also love the Shrek movies, super movie!
Welcome and all that good stuff. I will admit that your comment is confusing me. I'm a fan of the first (and second, kind of) Shrek movies, but not sure where this came up.
This post right here, was the TRUTH! Well done Dr J..I loved this!!
Michelle from Destiny's Child came to mind when you mentioned T-Boz.
Welcome*. I thought of Michelle too, and we know how the mens love her.
*Can I just put a constant disclaimer here that I'm fairly certain these are new commenters, but there is a chance I'm wrong? It's the lack of avatar, I'm a visual person.
Thanks for the welcome Sane!I'll be adding a picture
I love this post. It feels good to know that guys can appreciate a simple girl. I appreciate simple guys. Unfortunately it's the guy that thinks he's Gucci that is bold enough to step to you. lol.
Absolutely luvs this post….Im so Anne Frank but I can definitely turn the heat up!
I can agree with this post. I really dont have much else to add lol
All this time certain fans (read: haters) wondered why even though I never wear makeup, wear my hair natural, & don't OD on the f*ckem dress & heels (I can feel fly in a fitted white tee & flats) every single time I go out and I still get the guys. Well this post settles it. Some guys don't want the 'look at me' type ALL the time. Give me 15 minutes & I'll be ready no matter where I'm going. Self-proclaimed tom boy & never made any apologies for it. Feeling this post…kinda shocked really. Reminds me of when those Independent women songs started coming out. I'm like wow people are now starting to celebrate those females like me. I'm just one of the guys but I'm 100% girl (just not a girly girl). Guess its because my brothers & I were raised by a single father. *Thanks Dad*
Bonafide girly girl here so I'mma sit this one out; I'm razzle dazzle even in sweats and a tee..just my nature.
I appreciate this post! It's like you looked deep into my soul on this one….
I have always been the non-attention seeking woman at the club *unless I've had a few too many* but on the average I prefer to lay in the cut…..I hate heels, I have heels but I actually hate wearing them unless I have too! I don't wear lipgloss…I wear a little bit of makeup just to highlight my eyes..but, other than that I am very simple. I have always received alot of attention from the men though..but, I always felt deep inside they wanted me to glam it up some more..but, I do when do it(Sane said it best).
I like a man that can appreciate a woman in heels and her in jeans equally. Alot of dudes on here strike me as going for the glam girl with the 4" heels and lipgloss…I appreciate the fact that you are showing some love to the women who don't wear all of that….
I appreciate this blog…shoutout to all my e-brothas who regularly write and post…I'm in e-love with a coupla ya'll
Go Celtics!
Awww… This was cute J. It's good 2 know that I don't have 2 be ashamed of my sneaker collection. Lol. I don't even get the chance 2 wear em as much anymore & that makes me sad.
My gfs are some baaaaad bisches so when we starting hitting the town, I always felt the step my game up. Not that I was looking for more attn I just didn't wanna "look" outta place… But really you can most often find me by the bar trying/waiting to hold a conversation b/c that's where I shine brightest. I'm an extrovert but I figure so is every1 in the club, lol.
I've always been attracted to the dude in the group who was quiet or had the sly sarcastic humor off to the side. #shrugs. Simple as simple does, I guess.
after re-reading my response, I realize I suck @ commenting from my fone. I'm missing words #nshit. Ah well.
Great post, Dr. J! I'm a "tomboy-turned-girly girl" now. The great thing about that is I'm good either way. Sometimes I step it up, bring it on down, or do a combo. I'm good with a wife beater, fitted jeans, heels and accessories, OR wife beater, cargo pants and flats. I don't think being a girly girl and being simple have to be mutually exclusive, so I just do me.
I read da blog er'day,but 2day,I wanted 2 reply. I AM DA SIMPLE GIRL,I'm cute but not all glammed up,I'm not a tomboy or girly girl,jus simple,but for sum strange reason,I get da dude. Naw,dontr get me wrong,I'm not currently boo'd up but I can hold my own.
Keep up da good work!
Welcome! Please feel free to answer my unanswered question about why people are lurking.
absolutely love this post.
and here i was thinking you were averyshallowjerkwad.
lol.
my wardrobe for two summers straight was a beater, pull-away jogging pants, and some kind of running shoes. lol. now, i still love my beaters, but i'll throw on jeans and sandals or heels. i'm fabulously simple. fabulous yet simple… this post just helped me define my style. woowoo. lmbo.
never been the 'look at me' type, although i have friends that are. nothing wrong with being that way, i've just never been that girl. glad to see that side of the spectrum is appreciate as well.
this reminds me of ne-yo's song 'let's just be'.
"you ain't gotta get cute for me, truthfully, i prefer you with no makeup, in one of my t-shirts, bunny slippers on your feet, and just tryna be all up under me, on the couch in front of the tv, baby that's gangsta."
love that song.
great post grasshopper.
"this reminds me of ne-yo’s song ‘let’s just be’."
thats my favorite song on year of the gentleman.
I think there are parts of this post I really feel, and then parts where my taste diverges from J's.
My wife falls somewhere in the middle. She is definitely not the center of attention type. She's very much the laid back, quiet girl in the club with the group of loud, dancing on table friends. I love this about her. At the same time, subtly, she'll be the flyest of her bunch and she'll have on a brand new pair of Weitzman's. You won't always notice her but, if you do, you'll be like… wow… she's really put together well. I like this. I'm not a fan of the "Got Damn she's Fine but She parties all the time" types. Just not me.
But, I do also love that she's a girly girl. I secretly love that she knows nothing about sports. By nothing I mean… like… nothing at all. I don't really wanna watch the game and drink a beer with my woman. And I love that she knows nothing about Kobe as a player, but, can tell that he's clearly a Douche bag of a person… (who somehow has the cutest little daughters). I don't wanna play video games with my woman or anything man-related like that.
I love that she still does things that her parents told her to do when she was a child… like put her hat and gloves in her coat sleeves when she takes them off, brush her teeth before bed and clean stuff. I love that she's overly afraid of bugs and rodents and horror movies.
So I guess what I'm saying is I like the best of both worlds. I don't want a full, 100% plain jane. But, I also don't want a diva… I guess I want a Plain Diva…
"Now don’t get me wrong, I like that when she wants to dial it up she can. But today’s post was about loving the simple things that women do. A lot of women are convinced that men want to date Beyonce, um actually not. She’s doing too much. I wish she would go sit her Bodied body down and stop talking on the Telephone when driving. Case in point, Tamia still beats Beyonce in a taste test of 9 out of 10 men."
Sound familiar to what you like? People like verstality. No one said they want to kick it with their boys when their in bed with their wife. Just said we like that she ain't got to be all extra.com with it.
Dr. J: "Tamia still beats Beyonce in a taste test of 9 out of 10 men"
Easily. I'd say 97 out of 100 men.
I can so appreciate your appreciation of your wife! Love it! I didnt start trying to understand sports until my son started playing them…kinda uncool to not to understand diddly about the game.
I love how you speak about your wife with such love, respect and admiration. That is such a beautiful thing to me…..
That is all.
Cosign. 2 good good goood (c) Mr Cee friends of mine and their relationship is real.
Most always thugs me out when I hug his wife. Hilarious
Most – "Yo Streetz WTF?!!! Thats my wife reggin!"
Wife – "-_-"
Me – ":-O. Y'all aint sh*t"
I know, I can't fault you too much though… being that you knew her first and all.
MarriageSwindle always trumps deference swindle. Its like the big joker.
hahaha
Deference is the duece of hearts, Deference + Spec is the little joker, Marriage is the big joker.
Frat, Spec, Deference, Deference-Spec, Marriage
yo your comment had me LMAO literally!
when you get so personal .. I can't see your wife belonging in either catergory. It sounds like you just love your wife.
I, myself, really dig that space between what I may like and what my girl likes. I think it keeps the relationship strong for the long haul.
I've never dated seriously dated a girl who has liked sports, hiphop, comic books, or psychological
thrillers. But i have found myself extremely attracted, even connected to women who like these things. b/c lets face it, most women who like comic books and japanese anime are pretty ugly. So I see a cute football fan and I become infatuated. But that always crumbles, like I see too much of it. If you asked me about a dream girl, I would be stupid enough to say "big butt, looks of a model, DSL, likes football, cooking, and sucking me off" But in fact the girl I'm with is probably way better for me than this for me.
Psychological thrillers, really? When did these become a non-girly thing? It's not like Usual Suspects, Law Abiding Citizen, American Psycho and Seven are in the same category as testosterone driven films such as Gamer, Boondock Saints, Terminator 2, etc. This could very well be what stops our non-existent love affair here, CHeeKZy.:( I not only enjoyed Law Abiding Citizen, but love Boondock Saints.
{gasp!} A girl who professes love for Boondock Saints? I swear, every day you say something on this forum that makes me wish there were more quality women like you in the DMV…..
>:0[
Hi My name is HOTSCOTT and I'm a girly girl…Its in my nature. I have four older sisters who refused to have it any other way. I'm talking daily exercises of things like walking while balancing a dictionary on my head- to this day I have perfect posture but to the average person it looks like I walk with my nose in the air when its just the way I walk. Running out the house to the store? Is my hair done? If not does my son have a hat that matches my sweats? Do my flip flops match? Heels? HA! I'm 5'3 on a tall day, so if I'm getting dressed for work etc, I usually modify my height with the addition of 2"'-3" in heels. To my credit, I'm a simple kinda girl because these things are who I am as opposed to something I'm trying to do so I can get "dressed" in under 30 min without fail for a casual night out =perfectly fitting jeans, shirt and a cute heel and BAM!
Also girly-licious does NOT equal high maint!
Great Post
We are >>>>>>>><<<<<<< on this post. Nuff said. Sometimes I think you are the biggest pain in the butt and then you go and write something I really like.
Thank you for this one.
Gurrrl, you ain't neva lied! Just when you're ready to slap him upside the head he just has to do something that makes you wanna hug him.
Honestly, I've only tried to be honest with my posts on this blog and for the last few months it's led me to not drop any spicy and sour blogs about women. I hope that Thursday are getting pleasantly refreshing at SBM on account of No Female Bashing on this side. I just want y'all to be great this summer.
I'm usually a lurker but I'm loving this post!!!! I'm a tomboy on most days. Plus I'm a jock I've played basketball, ran track and played soccer in high school and college. So I'm know to wear sweats and still feel cute. I hardly wear heels unless I'm hitting the club or modeling in a runway show. Now in the club like to have fun. I'm always on the dance floor having fun with my friends. I dance like no one is watching. Lol So thanks for this post because plain janes rule.
"Or Modeling in a Runway Show"
#ISeeWhatYouDidThere
well played.
Lol, I was thinking the same thing. That was a nice plug.
Welcome and whatnot! I'm another one who plays sports, heck, I still play softball on the regular and still look damn good doing it.
I had me a softball phase. Of course, I played baseball growing up… what position did/do you play?
Softball is a perfect example of what i'm talking about… taking the time to look fly, but still playing in the dirt.
I'm utility player right now depending on who can't make it to the game, but they mostly have me on first. I've always been second, short, or pitcher so I'm not feeling first too much. I still make the play though!
That's funny because my coach got so mad at me when I was decked out in pink this last weekend (because my team outfit was still dirty from practice) and he hates when I have any makeup on because I just came from somewhere else. He tells me I can't intimidate the other team looking all girly. He didn't mind that a few were distracted though
Like some of the other commenters, I'm not plain jane, but I'm also not Ms. High Maintenance, just a girly girl. I'm the girl that usually does get noticed when I'm out.
I despise tennis shoes, so you won't catch me those. I own one pair for workout purposes and that's it. But I also don't really wear heels (I'm a flip flop/cute ballet flats kinda of girl). I also comb my hair before I leave the house always, as I was taught that you never know who you might see and always want to look your best. This doesn't mean full makeup to Walmart, but fixing your hair and putting on a little mascara and lip gloss goes a long way.
At the same time I can talk basketball all day (like how as much as I respect Kobe's skills, people who are comparing him to Michael Jordan should be stoned…and Lebron is a solid player and future hall of famer, but he's not yet "King James" , can't match Kobe yet, and if he doesn't leave Cleveland, he may end up ringless like AI because he has no help), lol.
I can kick it with the boys and fit in as well. But when they leave, the girlie girl in me will have me meeting you upstairs with Vicky's Secrets and Chanel perfume. It's a balance.
yeah I'm a girly girly too. even in my sweats and flips–I am a sneaker head on the low, but I still wear em in my own way…not boyish. there is an assumption that being girly means 100% high maintenance, when really if its who you are, its probably more like 40% maintenance, lol because the rest is effortless.
luvlydae08: "At the same time I can talk basketball all day (like how as much as I respect Kobe’s skills, people who are comparing him to Michael Jordan should be stoned…and Lebron is a solid player and future hall of famer, but he’s not yet “King James” , can’t match Kobe yet, and if he doesn’t leave Cleveland, he may end up ringless like AI because he has no help), lol."
QFT.
I'd be remiss if I didn't say "DIE CELTICS!"
T-shirt and boy shorts for the win. You don't need to look like you are headed to the club every time you leave the house. True beauty shines through when you are wearing plain clothes and no makeup. I never looked at Halle Berry the same since I saw her working out with Eric Benet with sweats on and no makeup. Cute to be sure, but not the unanimous "most beautiful woman in the world".
I personally prefer the 7.5 to 9 woman over the 10. Is it just me, or does it seem like the most beautiful women are the ones with the most problems?
"But through time and experience I learned something, those women love the spotlight, you can’t ask them to love you, because they love them some them."
QFT.
Sidebar: What is it with men and boyshorts? Guys are always talking about girls in boyshorts, lol. Ladies, apparently we need to take notes on this.
Personally I'm happy about the change from th0ngs to boyshorts… made my day. I despise the th0ng.
#thatisall
@So Flyy. Amen! Tangas are a good in between, but even those suckers are not meant to be worn longer than 15 minutes. lol
Wait… no hold up. No man told you to throw away your thongs.
I think the way boy shorts make a girl's butt looks is great. And it's just like if she's lounging around. As Wayne said, "She look good in boy shorts and a beater."
I still like to see a thong though, a g-string, and the awesome new c-string. But this phenomenon goes to show you that most women spend too much time on something that some guy just wants to take off. Not me though… I believe that presentation is 50% of your grade.
Speak for yourself, I still love my lace thongs. And anything in the "string" family is still my friend. Though, I'm partial to Vickie's "cheekie" hipster.
I want you to know I had to google this C-string you spoke of… are you kidding me?! Bwhahahahaha… ain't draws that's a panty liner.
I still love my lace thongs too, but I am noticing that boyshorts are on the come up, lol.
So Flyy, LMAO. If it makes you feel better, I had to google it too.
@Dr J. I don't put regular thongs in the same category as g strings in the like. purposeful sexy lingerie is different… but otherwise yeah I'd rather go commando than wear a thong. That c-string contraption is a joke, seriously just go commando…
About the C-string, I think it has some type of plastic or wire in it, that keeps it in place. But that will avoid when a guy gives you a hug, him feeling the string on your side.
About going commando, ain't nothing wrong with that. Some of you women know you are, (trying to find the words to describe this thing, without being disrespectful), "wetter" than most, and we don't like wet spots in the club. But seriously, commando is no foul in Dr. J's book.
boy shorts are such a win especially if you have the body to make it look right. thongs are ok too but i'll take boy shorts over a thong anyday. i'll have to look up this c-string thing.
Real plain Jane here who loves lingerie… I love them Aubade, Canelle, Lajaby, Huit, Simone Perele… sorry I don't like Vic Sec. I love to match them with my clothes, waxing is mandatory makes me feel HOT !
What's wrong with denim skirts ? even though I don't own one (yet) I think it's cute if you rock them…
Wait a Minute….all these shots at Lebron!! I rep OHIO ALL DAY!! and Lebron is MUCH better than Kobe…if you compare Kobe to when he was Lebron's age..No he is not better than the "Seasoned" Kobe but he will be…Kobe ONLY has championships because he has always had help…Lebron darn near stole one on the strength of himself against the Spurs…just getting there alone is much to be commended…
Lebron will get his titles…he is still a youngin in the game…"with great power, comes great responsibility" Kobe is NICE!! as is Lebron too!!
#thatisall
Lol, I love how all the Lebron fans keep basing his skills on what he WILL be. Notice, I believe he's a future hall of famer, but you can't crown him King based on his future potential. 'm talking about the player he is today. A great athlete, but still not what the masses have hyped him up to be just yet.
And please don't take this as a Kobe preference, because I'm not a Kobe fan, which is why I made the comment about people comparing him to MJ- no sir, you are not MJ!
Cease and desist on the LeBron talk.
There is no reason to put Kobe and LeBron in the same breath because LeBron hasn't done anything to deserve that comparison.
Kobe probably doesn't mind if he's the greatest or not, but the fact that people compare him to Jordan speaks volumes. I'm sure he's okay with being #2 for now.
When Lebron wins some championships or is at least competitive in the NBA Finals, (Let's be real the Spurs swept the Cavs in 5 games), then we can compare him to Kobe. Kobe's been to 7 NBA Finals, LeBron has been to 1. Kobe has 4 rings, LeBron has none. And at this point, the comparison to Kobe can be summed up with the following…
Reporter: How do you feel about LeBron winning the MVP?
Kobe: I'm still playing, lol.
Dr. J, I was with you until you said he's fine being number 2 for now. For now? Are you one of those people who compare Kobe to the greatness that is MJ? What real competetion for star player does Kobe have right now besides Lebron?
MJ kept countless hall of famers from getting rings. I miss the league when so many of the players were the TRUTH (yea, I was in elementary school back then, but still, lol). The point is Kobe is a breast, but sir, you are no MJ (aka the TRUTH)! And Lebron, you sir are not ready to get a title yet, lol.
I meant Kobe is a beast* not breast…but that fits too, lol!
Put it to you like this, the competition in the league has never been more competitive. 2, Jordan didn't win a championship until all the greats of the 80s left the game. 3, The 99 Lakers would have beaten the 99 Bulls if the Jordan would have stayed. The 99 Lakers were way better than the 98 Jazz.
Jordan went to 6 championships and won 6. Kobe has been to 7 championships and won 4. The competition that Jordan faced in each of his championships has been weaker. No one will argue that Jordan dominated a league in which there was no clear #2 guard as good as him. There were big men, but there was no other player who came close to Jordan. Kobe on the other hand is different.
However, I don't want to have this conversation because often times people are discounting how much image plays a part in the Jordan discussion. We can discuss that somewhere else.
I tell you one thing, Jordan came out with the beast V-neck tee shirts ever made with these collars that don't flap over. That's a great look.
I was actually going to formulate a response…but then I saw the V-Neck Tee comment :dead: Nothing further, lol.
Cosign on the MJ/Kobe comparisons. If I hear it one more time I'm going to scream.
I love to dress up and wear a pair of heels but I also love to do it with jeans a white tee. I do appreciate this post though because it's nice to hear that despite all of the "you all just aren't good enough being who you are (side eye to you slim thug)"- there is the "i like you just the way you are."
Although I must agree hotscott- just because I'm girly doesn't mean I'm high maintenance. Ok I am in real life but not around my man lol
I like to consider it well maintained. LOL. Example, I dont believe in getting pedi's for "special occassions" wtf is that about? anyday above ground is a special occassion and pedi's whether Kim Yu Lee does them or you do them yourself are just essential.
I will admit some of my issues -like having to have matching bra and panties that match my outfit are a bit much and borderline OCD but its who I am damn it! Ok sorry for the outburst
More importantly people who know me know that this is who I am to my core so for me to own a pair of sneakers outside of my gym shoes that have never been worn outside of the gym is not the norm for me.
"pedi’s whether Kim Yu Lee does them"
Just Sayin!
*Oh, how I amuse myself!
My intention was to say that just because you cant afford to or dont have the time to go holla at Kim doesnt mean you can't keep your feet presentable and crust free! lol
Dr J. likes a low key girl because HE'S the flashy one in the relationship. lol. Thats what I gather from the blogs, anyway…
cute post. like Silent Scorpion it made me think of the Drake line…your strategy is what a lot of guys (and girls) do. Never go after the ones everyone has their eye on. I'on like the term plain jane but keeping it simple is not a bad thing…
"Dr J. likes a low key girl because HE’S the flashy one in the relationship. lol. Thats what I gather from the blogs, anyway…"
You might be on to something here… "The sun don't shine if son don't shine".
Lol… j/k…
Real funny… I like a pair of Vans and a v-neck just as much the next guy. Regardless if my shorts are Polo.
#hmph
Cosign this post 100% but I fall in line more with MOST. Love a diverse woman. You don't gotta be a super duper fashionista, but I appreciate what you do when you do it!
@ luvlydae08 and TheMostInterestingManintheWorld
Thanks I had to plug it lol. When most ppl see all the sports I've played the first thing that comes to mind is a unattractive girl.
Futbol, track, volleyball, power tumbling <–yup you'd think I was a beast too. Lmao. But you're very right about some ideas ppl may form about you when they hear that you are a 'jock.'
I liked this. I don't think of myself as a "Plain Jane" as much as I consider myself "Bourghetto…" or a signature "Round the Way Girl" but I can appreciate certain pieces.
What I really want to do, is remind everyone that Kobe and LeBron are fundamentally DIFFERENT in their NBA experiences, and at the end of the day, Lebron is the better athlete. Kobe has been blessed (and talented) enough to have major successes in his career…….but cmonson…Lebron is that deal, and has time to prove himself.
Also….death to denim skirts. If you own one, and wear it, whether you're a girly girl or a Debbie down to Earth, KYS.
good post.
Co-sign on the Death to Denim skirts, and dresses, and jackets, and anything else that isn't jeans. Please just stop the madness!
I'm glad I'm not the only one who didn't cosign on that denim skirt. It's the denim diapers that are killing me.
Did I miss something? Because a tank, jean mini and flip flops are my vacation staple. You know I'm old, don't let me out the house looking like a 1985 flashback!
I cannot hate on the denim skirt. When a shorty has the right fatty and the denim skirt with the ends all frazzly… in the summer with the white beater and the stunna shades on… you have lost yo' mind. That's sexy.
DEATH to all one-piece denim outfits, especially ones that stretch.
Great post!
I never considered myself a plain jane, but when you have all the unbeweavable, heels everyday for every occasion, make-up all the time type of women, then I guess I would be plain. lol.
I'm that girl who laughs at women who walk around the mall in heels, and a full face of make-up like they are at the club. I'm wearing flats and lip gloss, and your man is checking me out. Yes, he is checking me out. lol.
It's not in my nature to be a "girly-girl". I like sports more than I like reality t.v. I don't drink fruity cocktails when I'm watching the Buckeyes, I drink Sam Adams. And when I go out, I dress to make me feel good, not so others can think I look good. I'm never the baddest chick in the spot, but I am the one men seem to gravitate towards. Like the song says… "Y'all read Swagger for Dummies. My aura naturally disseminates from me." lol.
This post gave me a hug and squeezed me tight,
then copped a feel. Thank you, Dr. J!I'm the best of both worlds. No Kels. Just Jay-Z and his nose.
I am a tomboyish girly girl. TGG for short. Because I like acronyms. Also, Aaliyah, was my mentor in terms of style. Sexy Tomboy. I feel most comfy in my jeans and gym shoes, but at the same time, I love me some spring dresses to show off the LEGS. When it comes to makeup, I am definitely Miss Plain Jane. I wear lip gloss to work everyday and that's it. Makeup is for going out and even then it's only mascara, eyeliner and sometimes eyeshadow (three things I JUST now warmed up to).
But yeah, this post was dope. Heroin. (pronounced: Hair-Ron)
I don't think Dr.J is saying he only likes tomboys. He appreciates women who are chill. Women who aren't "on" all of the time. At least, that's how I read it. It's not an absolute.
You gone make me buy you a fish sammich for lunch, J? This was the perfect little gift to the ladies. Specially the ones who think dressing up includes a maxi dress and flip flops, lol.
Us "Plain Janes" have actually been the bidness for quite some time…we just do our ish on the low. Quietly gettin' macked, in relationships, gettin' married and errthang.
Girly Girl's are the best!
I despise the fact that every woman these days wants to be a model. You can be pretty and girly without a face full of make-up, a head full of weave, and heels as if you're partying in downtown Manhattan.
You can also be a "Plain Jane" and not have to be into sports or rocking tennis shoes. I enjoy sports and a whole lotta other stuff with the fellas and I actually prefer for my chick to let me have that with the fellas.
Halle in boomerang…or Nia Long in love jones are what has me keeping hope alive.
This post was brilliant.
P.S. Many of us lurk because the same people comment over and over on every post. Even as a lurker, whenever I see a new name post a comment, its lets me know that there are other people out there that enjoy the posts and have opinions. It makes me wanna post myself.
Welcome!
Thanks for answering my question. I'm not sure how to fix that, it kind of makes me feel like commenting less to make room for others, but then you guys still don't come out of the shadows. Plus, if you won't delurk, how is the next lurker supposed to know that there are other people out there? Me thinks this is a Catch 22.
I think people should comment if they feel like it.
I kinda view blogs like message boards, sometimes if its too many cosigns or you echo a sentiment with no additions, its easier to just say nothing than to take up space…people will always lurk…I'm sure the authors of this blog are good either way. even though having unique perspectives makes it fun.
I feel you on to many cosigns and not having much to add to the conversation (I feel that way a lot on VSB when I come in on comment #759). I also think people should comment only if they feel like it, but I have really come to love y'all and want more people to love
and it really does add to the discussion. Plus, since I have been sanctioned the Goodwill Ambassador (said with the Pest's accent), I want them to feel welcome. That is all.
QueenT, you have a point with Chocolate Drop.
If you are watching the game at your crib, and your girl is there, what does your girl do? Does she leave, or chat with her girls in the other room? Or does she just not come over on game days? I'm just curious.
I think Tunde said it best, if I can sit through the Notebook, you can sit through a game. But if you aren't going to do that.. it would be nice if you wouldn't be a distraction.
Last year this time, I had went through some stuff and I was looking for a new flame, I met a girl on my way to Atlanta. Em.. bootiful. She was chill, except she wouldn't stop talking during the Laker game about stuff unrelated to the Laker game… I had to let her go. A woman might not know how to play basketball or football, but dammit you better know what "Playoffs" means.
So wait…you dumped her because she talked through a game? Is that all that was wrong..there had to be something else going on? You could've got her to stop talking during the game by simpling stating you didn't like it…there is more to this story Dr. J……hmmmm?
You're right, and we've got time…
Strike 1: There was a phone call during the Laker game that ended like, "I guess, i'll let you go." I hate when people say this passive agressive sh*t. I did a BIG thing by picking up the phone now you trying to pin the hang up on me?!
Strike 2: I had a sneaking suspicion she had a man in ATL, because she kept flying there like every other weekend. And then I remembered when I met her out there, it was like 7 girls in one room. Them women wasn't planning on staying in that room.
Foul 1: She was all the way or nothing at all. Like if she went to the club she was completely done up. If we was chilling watching the game, it was like she just rolled out of bed. Which isn't really a problem, but we still in the courting phase boo.
Strike 3: After thinking to myself, what's a better way to spend time with her during the Playoffs, I invited her over and then she started talking about randomness. She even wore a nice outfit, purple maxi dress and gold accessories, but she ruined it because she kept talking.
In her defense… the Lakers lost that game to the Nuggets and typically when the Lakers lose, I kick everyone out my house Martin style. So deading her wasn't too far off. I probably should have called her, but then it was a situation where it was like, I need to call her turned into a week, two, three and then I was like, I fumbled that, now I don't want to explain why I didn't call for three weeks. So I took my behind to the bus stop and caught the next one coming…
Dr. J, you are hilarious, that is all!
yeah..that was probably not going to work out anyway…she had somebody else.
I think alot of lurkers may feel a little intimidated..but, get in there..dialogue with us..:-)
Shoot, I actually kinda miss "Chocolate Drop" she did keep the pot stirred..did she not?!! LOL.
i can halfway agree with this, then again i can't. i don't want a plain jane and i don't want a woman who has to be the center of attention ALL the time. i want a woman who falls somewhere in the middle. i don't want a woman that no other man looks at. i want to walk into a room with my woman on my arm, and see the look of envy of other men in the room. *shrug*
high maintenance but down to earth. cute and sexy but not overly pretty. wait i'm lying. i want her to be pretty too. if she can go to the bar with me and order a heinekin or even a woodchuck. she doesn't have to love sports as much as i do but at least be able to watch a game with me every now and then without complaining. if i can sit through a movie like the notebook with you then you can watch the Skins game with me.
i'm an easy going type guy. i just don't want a woman who is extra.
The only areas where I am high maintenance girly-girl…
–bras/panties
–hair (shake dem dreds!!), skin, and nails.
–waxing
But, I don't really consider that high maintenance. Those are things all ladies should keep in top form, whether you are a plain jane or a girly-girl.
I agree. it is maintenance, but it doesn't make you HIGH maintenance.
It makes me really sad to say that I am so not Dr. J's ideal girl. I'm not a plain girl. I'm not the type who looks the prettiest in sweatpants and no makeup. And even if I was I still wouldn't be because all my swag dries up if I'm not ultra-groomed.
I was brought up to be a "proper lady" and that means not leaving my house without my hair done, makeup on and in heels. I will run out looking busted to hit the grocery quick or something, but other than that I just can't. Even when I dress down I'm still all coordinated and accessorized and ish.
I do have a plain girl's mentality though; I don't like attention and I'm laid back to a fault. I'm high-maintenance for sure but I'm the one that's doing the maintaining.
"Even when I dress down I’m still all coordinated and accessorized and ish. "
That is soooo me. I dress down, but even then, I have style with it.
My friends at work tease me endlessly for this one. They call me like "Sneaker Barbie" or "Casual Barbie" whenever I "dress down".
I'm betting that most of us on here are that way, even if we tend to dress down more frequently than Max here. I don't think anyone here is saying they leave the house busted. If they did, I'm sure they wouldn't be on here bragging. LOL
I leave the house busted.
Old school hood tricks to the keep the haters away. Can't be in the hood lookin like a million bucks. In the hood dudes appraise you.
I was talking about the womens, J. I know that I'll sometimes go out looking somewhat busted to avoid getting holla'd at, but for the most part, so there is sometimes good reason to go out like that. However, most people who go out looking busted don't realize how busted they look.
@J
"Let me, Let me, Let me appraise You"…LOL
@J it really DOES work! I stay in Brooklyn and if i look any sort of decent, i get honked at…and i HATE that! And i'm probably just as tatted up as some of these dudes out there but i could not fool with them AT ALL!
Well I drive flashy cars so that's enough right there to get me jacked. So the last thing I need to do is to be walkin around with a bunch of jewlery and designer clothes. In the hood you want your look to say " Don't eff wit me," not "I make good money and might be worth robbin."
This is something drug dealers in DC have been doin for a long time. Drive beat up cars and don't flash too much so people think you broke. The other thing I like is people show you who they really are when they think you are broke. When they think you got money they act different.
That is true! Look any sort of decent & folks hold their hands out! Don't you dare have a shopping bag in your hand either! It shocks me when people have really nice/flashy cars out here but some just don't care & like to live above their means or show off what they have.
I'm a grad student & i like looking as such…but being an early ed teacher, the best money won't be made but the pay off from students growing is the best! No matter what i make, i just like to be comfy & as long as i feel comfy, I'm a very happy lady! lol
In DC one of the biggest status symbols used to be Eddie Bauer coats. It's a winter coat that cost like $400. Whenever I used to see a dude with one on I would say that bamma may as well walk around with a target on his back. Cause them joints will have a dude puttin a gun to your head real quick. Flashin dough in the hood….not a good look.
Agreed! Folks like that have a death wish! I kept my ish simple, even if my parents were willing to buy label stuff (i never wanted them, my sister always did) i wouldn't wear it to school cause it will cause you to get jacked! Folks in my my school were pretty hood. If they couldn't fit your stuff, they'd still take it and give it to someone else they know that could.
I always wear labels, I like quality and nobody knows that that it's Burb, I paid for it, the brand didn't pay me. Plus it's not classy when you can read a label from far away…
I'm a lurker who's commented once b4. I thot @ this yesterday when I read SBM is a nerd with swag. I'm a plain diva (thanx Most) and wondered @ opposites n such. Not that I'm revealing any secret e-crush.
I love this post as well as most others. Sorry no platinum comment to add. Just needed to join with ma gurls. LeBron is bomb! Lakers makin frappuccinnos tonight!!!
Welcome again! (I love how you made sure to let us(me) know you've commented before LOL). No need to have a platinum comment, I usually don't. You wouldn't be the first (or last) of us to have an e-crush if you did, so no worries.
Gravatar.com (you already know)
I didn't comment earlier because my English sucks. I do now because I am too confident, lol… some might say conceited, but I disagree. Sometimes we think we are ''plain jane'' and we are wrong. I considered myself an average girl and was told I was ''sexually attractive'' (still trying to figure that one out, I guess that s another expression for F/%$#able..) by a wannabe ''friend'' and ''very sexi and beautiful'' by someone I thought who didn't notice me, he also added that ''you can't hide beauty and sex appeal without a lot of work''… i was sooo wrong.
Whats ur primary language? French?
Yes, French is my native language.
I think the main things about a plain girl that must also compliment her down-to-earth mentality is confidence and the ability to switch it up and adapt to her environment. For example, she can hang out with her man and the fellas and get a beer with nothing but a baby white tee on and denim, but then next week break out the pumps with that LBD (Little Black Dress – to the guys) and then continue crush them with intelligent conversation at her man's business dinner with the clients. You can be a Plain Jane, but you gotta know how to adjust the volume accordingly.
Indeed!
while this may be true, it's always appearant.
so thanks for the reminder.
that is all.
it's NOT always appearant.
"I Love Who You Are, I Love Who You Ain't"….And We Love the Love From SBM.
We, ladies, judge ourselves so harshly. You've given me license to toot my own horn. At age 20 every fashion detail matters, beyond that real life's details take priority. I strive to look scrumptious in running shorts & a White T while making breakfast. When the evening is planned, babysitter is booked, Oh yes, I'm Fancy. He shows me love because I pushed my own bike rather than settling to be a passenger on his, and he's comforted by my .40cal accuracy; and the fact that I can fix a toilet & a flat tire–when he's away I have to be Mommy & Daddy. He's so confused when I'm emotionally unstable because I am unmistakably a girl w/ PMS; but he copes with it because I cook his favorite pasta dishes, and come up with some mean marinades for the grill–put some of those ales on your steak fellas;)
He knows I can adapt to any given situation, but when we're home he has the real me. The me that keeps him guessing where it counts, and always keeps our foundations strong & consistent.
Bottom line is, a woman who is always made up to be pretty is lacking in self-worth. There will be baggage in her make-up bag.
Hot post.
I've been with the glamourous girl before. She got the boot after her failed attempt at helping me with dinner one night. (When I tell you to put the eggs in water to be boiled, KEEP THEM IN THE SHELL.)
I've never been into the tomboys too much. Can someone point me in the direction of the nerdy sistas out there? I don't need you to be familiar with the entire history of Doctor Who. But if you've considered an escape plan in case of a zombie invasion or know how to pilot a fusion powered airship, you should holla. I make a mean Cobb salad.
Bonus points if you wear glasses. Rrawr…
I might be really late, but I LOVE THIS POST.
I thought you were talking about me for a second, I'M THE ULTIMATE PLAIN JANE.
I love wearing tshirts and jeans and the latest kicks, flats, or flip flops
I CANNOT WALK IN HEELS (people will be hollering "timber!!!")
I'll go one on one with any guy when it comes to sports debates (basketball is my specialty)
When I go out, it's just to have fun, don't really focus on looking good to get a man
It's amazing to know that for most men it's the little and simple things that they find attractive.
Some women tend to do too much, when in reality they should just be themselves
I'm proud to say i'm a plain jane or "one of the guys"
thanks for this dr j