There’s more to being a Single Black Male than having a one night stand on Saturday and getting dropped off before the random shorty heads to church on Sunday morning. It’s a lifestyle (not to be confused with the eventually defunct condom). Like the rest of us, I work 5 days a week, run random errands during the day, struggle to stick to my gym regimen, and sometimes find myself in less than savory interaction with men and women that quite frankly just annoy the sh*t out of me. But often times in my saltiest moments, I remain tactful. It’s a gift and a curse. And with that said (typed), I wanted to take today to highlight a few examples of how my tact has helped and harmed me in daily life:
Gift: It’s Helped Me Keep My Job
Demanding Brawd: Slim, I need you to make 30 changes to this document in the next half hour. Thanks.
What I Think: Are you out of your mind? Since when did the title in my signature change to DB’s Office B*tch? Ya high maintenance flatbutt.
What I say: I want to make sure we manage expectations on this. I can try to have this done by the end of the day or early tomorrow.
DB: Well, it shouldn’t take you that long. We really need this done now.
What I think: Get the f*ck away from my desk. I asked you for your favorite food for the employee spotlight and it took you a week to reply. Like I don’t see you spending half the day playing Snood.
What I say: Given the number of changes you’re asking for, that’s just not possible. I have some other things on my to-do list that are time sensitive as well.
DB: Actually, it’s 35 changes.
What I Think: Die
What I Say: Okay, I’ll aim to have this to you tomorrow by noon.*smile*
Curse: I Miss My Post Deadline
Bad One: How come you never ask me about my day?
What I think: I wish you would go back to Brooklyn. Because I don’t care and this isn’t monogamous.
What I say: Sometimes I just get caught up in the mix with all that’s going on. How was it?
Bad One: Oh, you wouldn’t believe what happened with Ronsheeda. Blahblahblahblahblahblah
What I think: I really can’t have you around when I’m writing. I’m never gonna get this sh*t done.
What I say: Baby, I gotta finish this post.
**Midnight hits and I send an angry email with subject “Why is your post not on the site?” to myself and proceed to self-reprimand**
Gift & Curse: It Can Get or Cost Me Bunz
**5’8 cute chick is hanging out and drinking with me and the fellas**
What I think: Girl, you look like you taste like a smoothie. Let me drop the banana in there too.
What I say: You lookin’ fierce.
Chick: Thanks *giggles*
My boy: You looking right girl. Let’s be out back to the crib.
Chick: **Giggles then gets her coat**
What I think: F*cking damn it. Not again.
What I say: F*cking damn it. Not again.
So these are just a few examples of how being tactful has impacted my life for the better or for the loss. How much value do you place on being tactful? What’s your filter setting? Do you have examples of conversation snippets where you’re thinking one thing and say something much more sugary for the win or loss? Let’s have fun with this one today…even those who comment Tuesday through Friday and have nothing to say on Mondays. I see you.
What? You don’t think bloggers notice this?
I need to change my filter settings,
P.S. Remember to vote for us in the Black Weblog Awards. The nomination period opens today (18th)! Suggested categories to vote for us in are Best Group Blog, Best Sex and Relationship Blog, Best Lifestyle Blog, and Blog of the Year.