This week was aggressive. We mean that in a good way. Slim started the week with raw truth that hurt souls and Most ended it making women cry tears of happiness. We’ll spare you the long intro and just give you the comments of the week. Enjoy.
From KAPSpecial on Why Wasn’t I Good Enough?
So I’ve been reading these comments periodically and have given this issue some more thought while of course doing my employer’s work. I’m nervous about sharing, but this is the conclusion I’ve come to after reading the post and comments and thinking of my friends who’ve played the Jen role:
The female* sexual freedom movement will be the downfall of the entire human race (a little dramatic, but I’ll stand by this statement). This is why I wish friends with benefits or cut buddies or jump-off etc. were still highly stigmatized among women folk. I wish you still had to go to whore houses or hire a prostitute to conduct whore activity. But no, folks want sexual freedom. You know what you get with sexual freedom?!?!? Lots of damaged men and women. You can’t add rules to whoring. If you’re having no strings attached sex which is sex with anyone you can’t put a title on then you can’t have any expectations. And why share your body, your time, your emotions with someone you can’t have expectations of? (Cause it feels good? So does a crack high, I’m told.)
The next layer of demise is that folks are putting titles on folks that shouldn’t have titles – putting titles on folks you’re whoring with. Cause whoring just sounds bad/judgemental/negative i guess. So now you got a cut buddy, a friend with benefits, a jump off (now these sound like choices and freedom right? WRONG!) and then trying to universally apply a set of rules and expectations. Failure is inevitable. Sigh.
*I refer to female sexual freedom, because women actually run sex. I know it doesn’t look like it since large numbers of women have let the power go, but it’s true. We shall overcome some day.
First of all, y’all ladies know good and well you’ve seen a bad hairdo/cut in your day, LOL. Y’all know hairdressers get scissor happy…and start adding to what you said you wanted from time to time. Every time the hair dresser picks up some scissors, or mixes that color, we are taking a HUGE risk. Shoot, earlier this year, I walked around for about 2 weeks with ghetto yellow hair in the front cause I decided to experiment with the light blonde color instead of putting in my usual honey blonde! I felt like Big Bird! I was so embarrassed. It was young girlish…a total switch from my classy, classic look. I don’t think Streetz is trying to rob us any liberties, lol. I think he’s just giving us a friendly reminder to think long and hard before making drastic changes. As someone who’s had extremely long (lower back long) hair all my life, people always get up in arms when I mention that I’m thinking about cutting it. It doesn’t bother me at all. I get their attachment to it. I’ve had short hair twice. When I was 18 (it was damaged after I started using tracks to add thickness to my hair) and then I chopped it all off at 23 to start my locs (#clubnatural). Right after my smile and my behind (lol), my hair gets the most compliments from men. EVERY man I’ve dated has put “You bet not cut it” in the relationship contract. And, I sure do agree to it. I love that HE loves it. And, I’m admittedly superficial when it comes to my man’s appearance as well (work and lounging doesn’t count). So, his section of the contract has the following: “Don’t pop-up razor bald”, “No man-dals”, “No excessive weight gain”, “No biting your nails”, “NEVER tuck your shirt into your jeans”, “No linen garmets”, “Only limited shopping excursions at Changes and Downtown Locker Room” (I can’t be in public with a man who dresses like a yo-boy on the regular, sorry…dress like a grown man), “Your pants legs should be no smaller or bigger than Levis 514 straight leg jeans”, “Tailored suits only…no Steve Harvey joints”…man, I could go on and on, LOL. And, surprise, surprise, men care about what we think about their appearance as well. So, I get EVERYTHING I require…well eventually (sometimes the wardrobe change takes some massaging, lol…still trying to get my bf to at least try on a cardigan).
*sniff* – you made my morning with this Most. To answer your question, my father is hands down my first hero. Although he’s gone now, he is the prototype. My second hero is my husband. My soldier is not prone to showing alot of emotion (unless the Heat is playing or he’s had too much to drink, then he starts telling anyone who will listen that I’m the love of his life). He hid my engagement ring in a box of Texas Toast, told me that he was making dinner then asked ME to put the pasta on and the bread in the oven. So of course I’m complaining about him to my girl on the phone while doing it, and as I’m getting ready to toss the box in the trash I hear this “thump, thump”. I swear y’all like to piss us off just a little bit before springing the question, lol.
*Begins knitting booties in preparation for the Most Interesting Kids in the World*