Source: National Survey of S*xual & Health Behavior – Indiana University
A couple quick statistics before we begin:
- 1 in 4 people in monogamous relationships reported using condoms
- 1 in 3 singles reported using condoms
So, should women carry condoms? Or do they already? Whose responsibility is it to provide the protection?
Why the hell are only 33% of singles using condoms?
I was participating in such a debate a few weeks ago. It is important to protect oneself through whatever means necessary, but I don’t want to spend today debating how safe condoms are or are not. I think we’re all mature and intelligent enough to know that abstinence is the only full proof means of preventing pregnancies and STDs. However, for the non-abstinent amongst us, condoms are the next best thing. Therefore, should women carry condoms? My thoughts:
Hells nah. I was humping dating this one girl once, when she whipped out a smorgasbord of condoms she kept in an oversized ashtray. There were assorted colors, sizes, flavors, brands, etc. It seemed like anything the condom industry had ever specialized in was contained in that bowl. What was worse is that she offered me no explanation for her Ripley’s Believe It or Not collection of assorted prophylactics. Not that she owed me one. But SingleBlackMale family, I have never frowned so hard in my entire life.
Ladies, I’m sorry, but whenever a girl whips out a half-empty box of condoms that is a HUGE shot to a man’s ego, pride and subconscious. I’m no math whiz, but I know condoms come in packs of 3, 6, 12 and 36. Thus, if what you have isn’t divisible by three, I’m going to start asking myself a few internal questions. One of the answers to those questions might lead me to conclude, “O, she a [garden tool], fo sho.”
I mean if you whip out a 12 pack of condoms and only dump four on the bed… What is a man to think? Ego trip aside, if you are going to carry condoms there are a few things you should keep in mind. This brings us to our next segment…
Hells yeah. I don’t know if you know this but women people are going to count your condoms if you give them the opportunity. In fact, I’ll share two real life conversations I’ve had to that effect:
Kim: Didn’t u have 11 left last time I was here? There are only 9 here now… *innocent, yet simultaneously furious face*
WIM: *blank stare*
Kim’s BFF: Do you have a condom?
Kim’s BFF: Do you always carry condoms?
Kim’s BFF: Sooo you were expecting to get some?
WIM: *blank stare*
At the end of the day, I’m all for protecting yourself. You have to. It’s crazy out here in these single streets. At the same time, you can be smart about how you do it. No pun intended. So without further ado, in consultation with a few others and myself, I came up with the following 21st century condom carrying tips:
1) Ladies: You may or may not know that there is a “condom compact” available. It holds 1 – 3 condoms. It’s discreet, fits in your purse, and it’s dainty enough to protect the man’s ego instead of presenting him with a wide array of half-filled condom boxes. Not that it is any of his business – and he should be grateful you protected yourself – but let’s keep it real. Men do not want to try and figure out why the 12-pack condom box with the receipt dated for this month only has one condom left in it.
As an additional tip, if you have an interest in one man and you want to figure out his preferred brand, crazy idea coming, ask him. Any man over 21 who doesn’t have ONE preferred brand of condoms is suspect by nature. Plus, if you ask a man what kind of condoms he prefers and he can’t name a brand it is probably because HE DOESN’T USE CONDOMS.
2) Ladies and Gentlemen: Ok, so if you’re a guy or a girl who finds it un-lady like to carry condoms around, this is for you. It’s about presentation. Your condoms should be in an accessible location that doesn’t make it awkward or ruin the mood when you go to retrieve them. In other words, your condoms shouldn’t be in your attic. Sure, you’re safe and health conscious but while you’re shuffling through insulation looking for protection, you will ruin the mood.
Ladies, don’t be like the women in the story above. Don’t dump your half-empty condom box on the bed in front of your man. Please and thanks. Fellas, don’t be dumb either. Don’t whip out a roll from a 12-pack of condoms with only seven left. Pre-break those condoms, fool! You guys can have that awkward conversation about if she is “the only one you’re seeing” some other time.
What do you guys think? Should women carry condoms? Is it the man’s responsibility to provide the protection? Fellas, would you judge a woman that carries condoms? Preferred brand? (Trojan Ecstasy! FTW!). Ladies, do you carry condoms or have some at your home that YOU bought, not that are left over from a past relationship, why or why not?
P.S - Single Black Male is a finalist in 5 categories in the Black Weblog Awards this year thanks to your nominations! We need your help one more time! Please vote for us in the finals for Best Blog Design, Best Blog Post Series, Best Sex & Relationship Blog, Best Group Blog, and Blog of the Year. Make sure you use a valid email address otherwise it won’t count. Click here to make it happen.
P.S.S- Make sure you check out the website for b condoms. They’re the only minority-owned socially responsible condom company in the world, and they’re helping drive these discussions forward!