Ten Reasons to Hate Being Skinny

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From the author of Naturally Thin, a drink for Skinny people. Please pass me some Henny, sorry, White Remy, must watch my weight.

 

My favorite comedians are the ones who are “equal opportunity” comics.  You know who they are; they are racists towards both whites and blacks, sexists towards both women and men, prejudiced against gays and straights.  Life is funny and beautiful and I just think that if you dish it out then you should be able to take it.  Not everybody can deal with this though, those people would rather you not tell jokes about anyone.  That’s fine, life is funny to me, there needs to be some jokes.  I believe in God and the sanctity of church, but I think, “How come she’s a virgin if Jesus had brothers and sisters?” is funny as hell.  I recently finished writing a standup titled, “I got dirt on Jesus” and amongst other things outside of Jesus, the entire premise is that although people will say you can’t say that, you can if it’s funny enough.  Anyway, there’s a certain part where I said, “I don’t know how to take gay people in the workplace, I can only f*ck with them on the side, pause, and no that don’t mean no disrespect, but they are like queens on the chessboard, they can do whatever they want because people are scared to say anything back to them.  I watched a gay dude call a black lady a ‘b*tch’ at work and she went deaf mute, couldn’t muster a comeback for nothing.  I was like, ‘now you see why I don’t work on that n*gga’s team.’”  

Dr. J and DJ Todd bring you another exclusive workday mix, #SkinnyGuySwag:

Anyway, in the spirit of equal opportunity comedy and just to speak to the irony of life, I compiled the following list of Reasons to Hate Being Skinny.  You don’t see a list of these too often;

1.       People always ask you if you’re hungry – Actually I am.  If you know anything about me, you know that I love chicken.  Chicken and waffles for breakfast, chicken wings for lunch and mozzarella stuffed chicken for dinner, could be an everyday thing for me.  I have a high metabolism, but I am not starving myself.

2.       People always want to feed you – This leads to me having to try just about anybody’s cooking.  People feel the need to fatten you up.  It sucks because you want to explain that you are trying to pace yourself through life.  A lot of people try and get to their target weight in life too early.  Your metabolism has a whole lifetime to slow down, don’t rush it by putting on unnatural weight due to overeating.

3.       You have “no problems” with weight – If you ever spend the night at my crib, you’ll notice that I usually wake up and eat in the middle of the night or at least very late at night.  That’s because my metabolism is so high that I’ll lose weight if I go to sleep hungry.  It’s hard maintaining a healthy weight.  There are several things you can’t do because of low weight.  Did you know that if you don’t weigh enough you can’t give blood?  Did you know that if you don’t weigh enough, most passenger side air bags won’t activate?

4.       You’re expected to be good athletically – Let me tell you something, I’m not running anywhere of long distance.  I’m not running a 10K, half marathon or marathon.  I’ll run for the bus, some p*ssy, and maybe some chicken but outside of that, don’t look at me like I could run a marathon.  Or, that I’m somehow good at other unrelated sports.  I’m not all that good in basketball, I’m only fast because I’ve been running from bullies my whole life, and my size has nothing to do with why I’m good at baseball; skinny people do just as good as the overweight people.

You know how hard it is for a smoker to run a city block?!

5.       People assume you can always find your size – This is a very frustrating one; first off sometimes it’s just hard for people of my kind to find something that fits.  We can have long legs which complicates things because tall slacks might also have wide waists.  Tell me the last time you saw a size 29×36 at Old Navy.  Don’t worry I’ll wait.  And the other problem is everybody trying to squeeze their behind into something smaller than what they normally wear.  Women can speak to this more, but they’ll be trying on a size 2 at Bebe and the joint is either not available, or it’s stretched out because somebody who actually wears an 8 has been shopping at Forever 21 (even though they’re 30) and they’re convinced that they are a 2 when they’re really an 8.

6.       Windy days suck – Wind is the most frustrating thing on the planet to me.  Walking in the wind slows me down and pisses me off.  You might be a Christian, but you’ll cuss out God a few times on one of those days when it seems like the wind won’t stop blowing.  I had a friend who did the long jump in high school, at one of his track meets he jumped off the board and went wide left on the sandbox because of some gusty wind.  #effinridiculous

7.       Jokes are always on you – There is no shortage of skinny jokes in the world.  People can hoo-ride you for a whole semester on the school bus.  Nothing you can do about it either.  You just have to take it.  This one of those points that doesn’t go both ways.  I mean, in private of course you can make jokes about the opposition, but publicly … you’ll be judged.  However, for skinny people you can get roasted in public for being skinny and nobody will say sh*t.  I gave this some thought too and I can honestly say that I’ve never heard someone say, “it’s not nice to make fun of someone because of their weight” – when the joke was on me.

8.       You have “no problems” in life – If you have a problem in life, people will always tell you, “everything is fine, you’re attractive and thin”.  Excuse me, since when did being skinny and/or attractive mean that I can’t have problems in my life?  Is being skinny going to bring back my Uncle Charles, dog?  Does being skinny mean that I’m not frustrated at work because of my racist manager or the loud talker on my team who likes to argue?  Or do you mean that I’m automatically absolved of hard work because in the end, everything will work out just fine?

9.       Some people (of the opposite sex) just don’t like you at all – The thing is, when you hear people talk about who they are attracted to you’re likely to hear, “I like my men with a little meat on their body.”  You’ll never hear someone say, “I like my men with no meat at all on their bones.”  Actually, that’s not all the way true, I’ve met a small subset of aborigines who like skinny guys.  But it’s just not all that common. 

...I should smack the ish out you.

10.   People always comparing you to some celebrity – I get compared to every skinny black man in entertainment.  But I’ll tell you one thing, you’ve never heard of anybody being told, “You know, you look like Oprah.”  Can you imagine that?  A chick can get knocked the eff out for something like that.  But for like two years straight people would tell me, “You remind me of someone, I just can’t put my finger on it … DAVE CHAPPELLE!”  I’m like, the reason you can’t put your finger on it is because I don’t remind you of sh*t.  I guess all skinny people look alike, my situation is especially worse because I’m Black too.

I’m fully expecting this to be completely roasted in the comments section today.  I’m prepared for it.  But I bet you’ll prove every point that I made here true by doing that.  My sincere point is, that it’s kind of ironic that people choose sides and make one, OK and the other, Wrong.  A perfect analogy would be calling Republicans, “racist” and them not having the right to say that Democrats, “don’t have the ability to stand up for what they believe in.”  It’s not always as easy as people think when you’re skinny.  Not all pretty people are dumb.  Not all tall people can play basketball.  Not all Asians are smart in math, (I actually tutored one for the SAT, how crazy is that?).  And I think I said this before, but people find accents to be “sexy,” some women will say, “you only like her because she has an accent.”  They won’t be around for how many jokes she gets about not being able to speak English correctly, they only see it one way.  Think about all of this the next time someone cracks a joke around you.

— Dr. “you’re not average” J, humbly takes a bow.

More Information on #SkinnyGuySwag, by Dr. J & DJ Todd, stream above or download here: 1. Live This Life by Big Sean & The-Dream, 2. Boom by Snoop Dogg & T-Pain, 3. Out Of My Head by Lupe & Trey Songz, 4. You Be Killin Em by Fabolous, 5. Roll Up by Wiz Khalifa, 6. Click Clack Away by Diggy Simmons & Bruno Mars

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  • Starita34

    So yesterday we were supposed to feel sorry for pretty people and today it's skinny folk?

    Oh.

    Naw, I joke, everyone has their issues. 7 and 9 are particularly spot on. I definitely have said I don't prefer skinny guys and being overweight, I'm pretty insensitive to skinny jokes. From my vantage, skinny guy problems don't look all that bad, but like I said, we all got our issues.

    http://bit.ly/pQfK1B

    #SWIDT

    • http://www.twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis…

      I think a man died from asphyxiation because is girlfriend sat in his face #1000WaysToDie…

      BTW on my bucket list… I need to make a BBW p*rnstar my girlfriend…

      • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

        no he died because she suffocated him with her breasts

  • cynicaloptimist81

    Skinny woman on deck! And I def enjoyed this list, lol. My favs were:

    1…cause I'm always hungry too, lol. I usually eat dinner after 8pm so I won't wake up starving.

    3…cause I lose my appetite when I'm experiencing an extreme emotion (excited, stress, etc.) and I automatically lose my grown woman weight, smh. I was in Macy's last April and was asked if I was looking for a prom dress!!! I don't wanna look like a teenager…at all.

    4…I'm actually pretty fast cause I had to walk/run double time to keep up with the taller people in the world, lol.

    5…stores never have size 4/5/6…or a size 8 shoe. I'm always blown, lol.

    6…THIS! Days like this, I wish I could still hide in my Mom's coat. I feel like a kid getting tossed around. And I'm short too? #losinginthewind

    9…I'm too thin for somebody…too short for someone else…too brown for that person…too light for that person…too much forehead for the other person…too large eyes for the next person…too many kids for him…an unwanted divorcee to another, lol. Whatever. I'm not for you and that's okay. I'm for that guy over there…and there…and there, lol. And I probably don't like you anyway! #ontothenextone

    • TellyLongLegs

      **gives CO a high five***

      This is me…

      I’m too thin for somebody…too TALL for someone else…too brown for that person…too nappy for that person…too much forehead for the other person…too large eyes for the next person…

      Wait, they never have a size 8? Same here with the size 9.

      • @Top5DOA

        Because an 8 shoe is the average shoe size for a woman.

    • GirlSixx is ChloeRay

      Your #9.. LOVE IT!!!

      I like how you think.

  • krystllyght

    While skinny, after eating a meal my tummy always pokes out, sometimes to the point where I'm asked if I'm expecting. Ruined prom and homecoming pics btw. I think redlady once called this a "food baby." I'd add this to the reasons above.
    I'm not exactly skinny now (but not fat), but my body still does this. Feels like everybody knows it when I just ate lunch.

    • http://babblesworld25.blogspot.com A

      ALL of your comment is the ONLY reason I don't like Thanksgiving and Christmas.

      before the meal it's "dang, are you ever going to gain weight" afterwards, though it's "this is how you're going to look when you actually get pregnant, all baby is what you'll be"

    • http://musicmakesmehigh.wordpress.com Reecie

      the food baby is my life too, sister. I some times poke it our real far and be like "don't I look 3 mos pregnant" THE WORST.

  • http://www.twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis…

    Question, why hasn't Monique been roasted for writing a book denigrating skinny women & then she inches closer to their side…?

    Anyways… The hungry part was funny…

    In America, (another reason I need to turn off the TV), women are constantly made to feel bad about their most precious asset… And come to find out, it was pre-meditated (SHOCKER!)

    Do skinny women REALLY have it that bad… (I think the WW who struggle to stay skinny for the white men who like their women d*mn near anorexic), I wonder how BW fare

    I would think that since USA has turn into fattie central, that they could swag in out in life…

    I'm sure their is a study out there that says they make more money & get more action in the dating/social realm…

    Now if you ask me to choose which team to be on…

    For the next couple of months I'll rock with fatties, and then I picl women more slender for the rest of my life…

    Any overweight chick I entertain HAS to get her weight down… Like Max, I have <DEL> the soul of a cheater (now that I know I can get away with it) </DEL> entitlement issues…

    Nothin' wrong with getting roasted Dr. J… It builds character <DEL> esp. cause you plan to wife up b!tchy latin dimes </DEL>… Leader have to learn to deal with conflict…

  • http://withinmyreality.blogspot.com BBB

    loved this post,

    refershing o have the skinny people on the line for once

    and i applaud the fact that you can laugh at yourself

    Not all pretty people are dumb. Not all tall people can play basketball. Not all Asians are smart in math, (I actually tutored one for the SAT, how crazy is that?). And I think I said this before, but people find accents to be “sexy,” some women will say, “you only like her because she has an accent.” They won’t be around for how many jokes she gets about not being able to speak English correctly, they only see it one way.

    this had me rolling

  • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

    great post man. i have similar problems to you. i've been thin my whole life. (looking at the rest of my family) i'll probably die thin.

    i have a super high metabolism. its 12:04 here in nashville and i just crushed a large number 11 from jack in the box a hour ago and i'm still hungry. it really sucks being hungry all the time and eating like 4-5 meals a day.

    don't know about the athletic thing. i'm thin but i'll also kinda tall so i worked on my athletic skills early. i'm a great runner. i hoop kinda good. i'm lying. i'm a great hooper. i'm also a decent receiver.

    you wear a 36 inseam? how is that possible. i'm like a 33×36. that's even harder to find i believe. add that to the fact that 12s and 13s are always the first sneakers to go and i hate shopping.

    when i hear women say they don't go for thin men i actually laugh to myself.

    oh and if i get compared to kevin garnett one more time.

    • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

      its really sad that it took me a min to figure out where in the US you could be at 12:00 when it was 1:00 my time……sometimes I forget that PST and EST aren't the only time zones in the US (but they are the only ones that matter lol)

      • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

        lol really? damn the whole midwest and south huh?

        • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

          not the whole south, I'm in Atlanta we're on eastern time

        • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

          this is true. i meant the real south like mississippi, alabama and louisiana though.

    • http://naturallydreaded.wordpress.com N.I.A. naturally

      It could be worse. They could compare you to Greg Oden…

      • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

        damn, you're right. thanks for the silver lining nia

      • WAChick

        Ugh, Greg Oden–now that is one facially challenged man.

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      My inseam isn't 36, that was an example, lol. It happens to cats though.

      • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

        oh ok. i was like wait i wear a 36 so maybe my pants are too short.

    • TellyLongLegs

      You too? I can eat at 10 and less than an hour later I'm searching for the next meal.

      • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

        imagine how i feel right now. i skipped breakfast. *ribs touching*

  • http://panamaenrique.wordpress.com Malik

    Co-sign 1, 2 and especially 3. I have to eat at least 4 meals a day or snack like every other waking hour in order to not constantly be losing weight.

    As for #9 I've been told on multiple occasions by thicker women that they would 'break me'. Has yet to happen.

  • http://www.simplymerenee.wordpress.com SimplyMeRenee

    Dr. J, you just spoke my entire life in this post.

    I'm always hungry. I hate to shop because finding the right fit for my lower half is beyond annoying. I'm asthmatic, so assumptions of athletic superiority are the opposite of my life. I'm also allergic to a plethora of foods. I look like an a$$ because I don't allow everyone to feed me.

    My favorite on the list has to be number 8. I always get hit with "you're skinny with a phat a$$." What does that have to do with the price of tea in China? I gots problems too! lol

  • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

    yeah I just can't get with this post, I don't have skinny girl problems, do you know how much cardio and how many squats I have to do to erase eating just one piece of cake!?!? But I'm sure you guys do have problems, we all do, mine just happen to be thick thighs…so while you're up late eating jack-in-the box I'll be on the elliptical drinking some water….I guess that saves me money on food.

    but "I’ll run for the bus, some p*ssy, and maybe some chicken" had me dyin!!

    • LetsLove

      My thoughts exactly. I def rolled my eyes a few times while reading this because I work hard too!! Sometimes I get annoyed when girls think i'm one of those girls eating twinkies and whatever else but still maintaining my weight. Every time a girl is like "ugh I want/wish I had your *insert body part* you're so lucky!" I think to myself… "I'm positive you wouldn't want the accompanying workout regimen". Luck?! Yea not so much.

      Oh and I'm not typically physically attracted to thin dudes either. oh well. If my thighs are bigger than yours I will feel a bit whale-ish. No bueno. Not a deal breaker tho. Thin>short.

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      I can see it now. Kriola (takes off those pesky shades) is sitting on the couch reading Healthy Lifestyles, and Dr. J is reading Chicken, an annual special edition from Cooking magazine.

      Eat your cake, girl. As long as you know how to burn it off, eat as much cake as you want.

      • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

        I have to lay low on the cake cause I have a love hate with cardio so I gotta keep it at 2mi or under.

        side note… I have an insane love for chicken too, not the fried stuff but roasted and BBQed I could seriously eat it for every meal! but the best part is chewing on the bones, (its an art that was passed down from my mother) thats were the good stuff is at, unfortunately I can't be chewin bones in public so I only do it at home. …sigh.

        • CHeeKZ Money

          "I have an insane love for chicken too"

          That is b/c you are a n!gger.

          But I say that with love.

        • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

          LMAO!! yes this is true

  • Lady

    While I do hate walking outside when its windy out (seriously, its been a battle at times), I gotta say there are worse things in life. I HIGHLY prefer being skinny over being fat. You know how many health problems you sign yourself up for when you're overweight? I'll take a few extra years of life over a nice donk anyday LOL

  • Yoles

    i'll be the first to admit i usually don't see the skinny people problems but that's because it's the ideal skinny, rich, pretty, big d*ck, handsome, fat @ss (for our minority brethren), big perky t*ts etc… that's what people in this country are shucking and jiving, striving and trying to be… so its easy to miss… i will try to empathize from now on. let me just add extra weight doesn't really help with those heavy winds because there have been plenty of times strong gusts of wind have had my fat @ass shuffling and skipping (trying to maintain a look of control) down the street :)

  • Mo

    I'm constantly struggling to shed excess weight. Well, at least I have been since I gave up active sports hobbies for a busy career path with 15-hour days and lots of excuses at the weekend :)

    However, one of my closest friends – same age as I (33) is constantly battling to keep her weight above 102 pounds and she's not short, she's 5ft 6 in. She maintains a good and healthy diet, but her metabolism is always 10 steps ahead of her and she can shed 4 – 6 pounds between morning and night-time.

    Thanks to my friend, I appreciate that the weight problem can go both ways.

  • Smilez_920

    I hate when ppl try on sizes they know they cant fit. I think alot of women think the tigher the outfit the sexier it is. That is not true for everyone the tighter the outfit the easier it is to see the , (rough era's of the body) I've seen girls who go 2 sizes smaller buying a dress, so that the dress will make their butt's look big.

    I'm a size 8 (im also 5'7) so I look pretty small at times. I go into the store to buy a maxi dress and the medium felt like an extra large b/c somebody tried to squeeze their a$$ up in it. I was so mad but luckly there was one more medium left.

    • BP

      I'm waiting for Dr. J to ask you what store you can fit a size 8 in. Girl, you have to specify with him. #iHatehim lol

      Anyways, I am 5'7 and also a size 8 but I don't think I ever look small due to my thighage. It trips me out when women try to squeeze into something that they shouldn't be in. I don't have any sympathy for skinny people though, they fit everything.

      • http://Twitter.com/InAnimateAlpha Animate

        Trust me, skinny people can not fit into everything. I have to make sure my polos dont look like tall tees. Its easy for things to be a little too big and then you end up looking like you are wearing your dad's clothes.

      • GirlSixx is ChloeRay

        Cosign your entire 2nd paragraph

        I raise your size 8 to my size 10 depending on the store. *sucks*

        #NoCountry4SkinnyPeopleProblems

      • BP

        @Animate. Boo, I still don't feel sorry for you. The fashion world is built around skinny people frames. #yeahIsaidit

        @Girl6 See, that's why you my girl! I don't feel bad for skinny folks. "Life is so hard I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want…booo hoooo" #GOHWT #NoCountry4SkinnyPeopleProblems

      • Smilez_920

        Well I’m young so my wait goes up and down… When I’m in school I tend to lose. But I was at Zara's the other day buying a dress, I swear the fashion industry can make you feel skinny one day and fat another. I had to buy a size large to fit my lower region. I was trying on the medium struggling in the dressing room. It was too much.

        • Smilez_920

          weight** (typo)

        • http://musicmakesmehigh.wordpress.com Reecie

          that's because those non american stores don't do vanity sizing. I know in Zara wearing a small is pushing it, but sometimes it works with tops. never bottoms/dresses though.

  • TellyLongLegs

    Number 1 and 2, since I'm Haitian the fact that I'm skinny is an instant violation, so people are ALWAYS offering me food. I don't complain because the way to my heart is food and I do like to eat all types, especially chicken, and I do several times a day. But in the same breath don't say I'm anorexic if you see me eating every hour. 

    Jay, number 5 is the truth!! It's so annoying. I am a size 2-7 depending on where I shop. It doesn't make any sense and I cannot stand it when people say oh "you're a zero". Uh, I haven't been zero or a one since elementary school. GTFOH!!!

    Oh since Old Navy never or rarely has my size, I don't shop there. Which is baffling  since they only have skinny people in their commercials #shrugs

    Then you have the pants…frustrating. I can find the right size but then they look high water then instantly they become capris. Do u know how long it took me to find out about L?!?  That was the best…. 2L, 4L..it changed my life and it felt like heaven because some designer out there made pants for people like me….***looks up and thanks God***

    Number 7, people that are larger than me ALWAYS have some type of joke but if you fix up your mouth to say something then YOU'RE the one with the problem…perfect example Monique. 

    Number 10, a few weeks ago I had the fro out and this guy told me I looked like Lauryn Hill…o_O…now she's beautiful (once you look past her wardrobe) but I don't look anything like her. Are you just trying to say we all look alike? 

    Jay, great post. People don't understand the plight of the skinny people, especially when you're tall.

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      Don't let people tell you that you look like Lauryn Hill. That is not cool at all.

    • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

      AYISIEN!!!

  • @Top5DOA

    I've been "skinny" all my life and it's something i've overcome mentally. I'm 26 next month and to this day i still get jokes about how small my ankles are ( ,-_-) … I can't help it … i wish the next 3 meals went straight to my ankles or my legs period. @LetsLove, yeah you would definitely be on special for my thighs, or lackthereof. I hate my weight (I'm around 167 right now) … 185 would be ideal. I had failed hopes and dreams of being a NFL football player…I have the talent, but my weight has held me back, therefore i never tried out for football ever for fear of being broke in half on the field. I don't want my obituary to say, "We told him he was too small for football". My brother is my ideal weight and he's 4 years younger (I'm jealous).

    I have a big little brother. This is the thought that keeps me up at night, so i over-compensate by lifting alot of weights and building my upper body to divert the attention from my legs … I'm like a dayum upside down Dorito chip … Lol … Woe is me.

    • TellyLongLegs

      “We told him he was too small for football”

      Smh…too funny

    • cynicaloptimist81

      Awww…its alright, homie. My legs are very skinny below the knees. The only reason my thighs are meaty is because they are connected to this booty, lol. I can only buy Steve Madden and Nine West knee boots…no other boots fit my calves…and I still have to wear long socks underneath!!! And I can't wear most ankle boots at all…they look ridiculous on me! LOL…smh…

      Woe is me…

      • @Top5DOA

        "The only reason my thighs are meaty is because they are connected to this booty, lol."

        ^^^^^ The #ThirstTraps have come in an abundance the last few weeks. I commend all you fellas for not falling victim. I know it's been tough with the pretty girl topics, Women's Beauty Recognition Paradox, CBA (physical attractiveness), The strip club, the bad chex convo and how that'd never happen cuz i do this and that, etc. … I mean you ladies have been going hard in the paint (intentionally and not) with the #ThirstTraps and i'll admit, i've fidgeted a lil with the traps mentally a few times, but proudly didn't fall victim with a "Post Comment" and #OpenThirst *Throws myself dap*.

        I must say you ladies have a way with words, wit, descriptions of yourselves and activities you perform and Alluring baby small profile pics that'll make any man want to see whats good, but Here I Stand Strong Convinced That In The End I'll Still Be Here Standing Strong With Dignity That I Didn't Exude Open Or Public Thirst.

        Can i get an AMEN fellas???

        • cynicaloptimist81

          Oh, come on, LOL! I've also disclosed the "not so generally accepted" things about me as well…as the other ladies have and do more often than we note our assets.

          There's a balance, LOL.

          You are funny, lol…like y'all don't prop up how y'all live in the gym, make chicks wanna sing "Heaven Must Be Like This" in the bedroom (WIM), dressing all fabulous (oh yes, @Top5DOA…I'm talking about you specifically here), quoting scriptures (Hugh Jazz)…y'all set #ThirstTraps too!

          LOL

        • cynicaloptimist81

          And for all the ladies…

          Larry's new avi is the #ThirstTrap of all #ThirstTraps! How do you go from no avi to THAT avi?! LOL…you shoulda warned a sista first, lol.

          Can't believe I forgot to include that, lol…I've been working overtime not to comment about it when I see it, lol…

        • Nice

          Let the church say Amen… I've read studies that show thirst levels have been increasing 3-5% per year every since the proliferation of the urban model. Those same studies show this phenomeon is 35% more likely to occur on FB, Twitter, or a blog with a large female population.

          "The only reason my thighs are meaty is because they are connected to this booty, lol" She really tried to set the thirst trap and camouflage it by writing LOL at the end. We see through the trap though.lol

        • @Top5DOA

          "dressing all fabulous (oh yes, @Top5DOA…I’m talking about you specifically here)"

          Yeah Yeah

        • cynicaloptimist81

          @Top5DOA

          *snickers*

          "Yeah, yeah" is your comeback, huh? You shoulda just told me I was right, lol… Saved me the trouble of reading in-between the lines, lol…

        • http://twitter.com/bruiser_ham Larry

          "Larry’s new avi is the #ThirstTrap of all #ThirstTraps! How do you go from no avi to THAT avi?! LOL…you shoulda warned a sista first, lol."

          *Snaps fingers* dang, they're on to me…taking down trap tonight after work to replace with something less…trappy..? *shrugs* lol. Nah, j/k…this made me laugh, though. Sorry, I'll try to give a proper warning next time :-)

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      They said I couldn't play football I was too small.

      They say I couldn't play basketball I wasn't tall.

      They say I couldn't play baseball at all.

      And now everyday of my life I ball.

      (Lil Wayne – Luxury Tax)

    • http://twitter.com/_samoune SamIAm928

      what happened to the quote box thingy?

      "I have a big little brother. This is the thought that keeps me up at night, so i over-compensate by lifting alot of weights and building my upper body to divert the attention from my legs … I’m like a dayum upside down Dorito chip … Lol … Woe is me."

      lmaoooo but this^^^ had me rollin

    • http://yahoo namia

      the gym can help you build your whole body even legs/thighs do not know about ankles..my brother has been skinny all his life, like smaller than snoop skinny…started the gym last year..he actually has a chest!! now, some biceps…amazing things i tell you:-)

  • QueenT

    Well, my ex-husband was naturally thin….puts you in the mind of JJ Evans of Good Times but nice looking….he could eat like there is no tomorrow..my son is built just like him…caught him trying to lift my 5 pound weights the other day talking about he wants to get some muscles…he is already developing a little complex about his size..I keep telling him he looks fine…he is not skinny he is slim that nothing is wrong with being slim, etc………..but, I will tell you this….I have been knowing his father for 20 years..and he is now in his 40's…and he isn't skinny anymore….he finally put on some weight…..wow…I never thought it would happen…so, Dr. J, look to your 40's and you will find that you will not be as skinny as you are now…..so, watch how you eat, there is nothing worse then a skinny man with a paunchy stomach when he get's to be middle-aged….the way you eat now will creep back on you later and it will settle in all the wrong places…..

    I will tell you this about skinny people, I have known people who were skinny all thru there 20's, 30's and as soon as they hit middle-aged something happens….it's amazing…the weight just appears out of nowhere….it's either in their gut, face or they blow up all over…..it does happen so be careful skinny people….

    PS- have you seen JJ from Good Times lately? my point exactly.

    • TellyLongLegs

      This is exactly why I eat healthy the majority of the time. I will not fall victim to this.

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      Yeah, but see you just trying to bring skinny people down. Thanks Queen, I hear ya. But, this is a hereditary thing. It's like something that everyone hates about my family, even as we get older we don't really get out of shape. My dad was 6', 180 when he went into the service, he is 6' 185 now and he's in his fifties. My grandfather was the same way. But if you read, that's why I said something about pacing one's self over their life. But to your point about I won't be skinny when i'm in my 40s, yeah that's just not the case in my family. I'm kind of stuck this way.

      • QueenT

        J, I am not trying to bring skinny people down at all….I was just speaking about some skinny folk I have known thru the years who gained weight as they approached middle age..I am sure there are exceptions as with everything……

  • http://www.becauseimwrite.com muze

    first of all cracking UP at that signature. y'all know average isn't one of the qualities you guys can claim.

    anyhoo… so this is almost the male version of my skinny girl post.

    in my old age, i've become a fan of big men. not obese, but those in the 190-230lb, six-footer club.

    i used to LOVE skinny men though. didn't really realize the change until i started typing this comment.

    i sympathize though. people have been trying to feed me and put "meat on my bones" my whole life. your waist is a 29 though or was that a hyperbolic example? wow if so. lol

    funny post.

    • cynicaloptimist81

      "your waist is a 29 though"

      Can't believe this didn't stand out to me when I read the post, lol…wow. I used to LOVE LOVE LOVE skinny guys. Like, I used to be in LOVE with Marlon Wayans, lol. Now, I prefer a 36/38 waist…depending on height. I basically just want some grown-man meat, lol.

      I also have a thing for men with butts, lol…which you rarely see on a skinny man. *shrugs* What can I say…lol…its what moves me…

      • http://www.becauseimwrite.com muze

        omg i would have given Marlon a whole slew of black ashy babies. lol. love him.

        but yeah… after dating a former college footballer, i naturally date bigger men now. Lol at having a thing for butts. what's funny is every man i date usu has a bigger rump than me. sigh. skinny girl swag.

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      Funny thing about this is that most men don't buy jeans the right size for their waist. So you'll never really know what their waist size is until they go get a suit. Since a nice suit should not require a belt and I like a snug fit, i'll get a 29 or 30 waist and just buy another suit if I outgrow that. Which I haven't so it's not a problem. It can get a little uncomfortable after a steak dinner, but we make it work. But I know dudes my size who buy 34×34 jeans and then get the big bulky belt to cover it up… not my style.

      • http://www.becauseimwrite.com muze

        true, very true.

        i loathe the baggy look on any male, especially grown arse men, so i agree.

        european cut ftw.

    • http://twitter.com/bruiser_ham Larry

      *checks height* Still 6'0" 1/2 (yes the half is crucial, lol)….*steps on scale* whew, 192lb…I'm down a couple of pounds because of this Insanity workout I've been doing, but I refuse to get below 190, lol. Talk about barely meeting minimum requirements. My mid-year review would be at a "barely" meets expectations, lol!

  • http://twitter.com/MsJamie14 MsJamie14

    I was all set to come in here and defend the skinny crew! But you're one of us. LOL. Great list.

    Being skinny is pretty awesome, I like to eat and love how folks want to feed me. But yes, windy days suck, and having a lack of "padding" can definitely hurt! I bruise like a peach! When dudes are looking for their "warm body" to cuddle up to in the winter, I'm not the first one they'll pick! LOL

  • Tisha

    I remember I was in line at the cafeteria at my old work place & a co worker whom I was friendly with said to me "Wow, you are so skinny! Do you ever eat?" I looked at her and said "Wow, you are so chubby! Do you ever stop eating?" She got upset o_O

    I am constantly eating (my friends call me wanga belly, long gut etc) but whatevs, food is my friend LOL

    Shopping is a pain in my small ass and don't get me started on the wind. I have actually been swept off my feet a few times. Thought I would be the next Dorothy and end up in OZ.

    When I was younger I used to be really offended when people would make fun of me for being so skinny, now I just brush it off as I help myself to a second plate of food….

  • Berriblk

    Yo! I keep hearing about this phenomena with my skinny friends waking up and eating in the middle of the night….thats crazy to me, but I guess I see their point now.

    I used to be insensitive to uber skinny people and clothing shopping until I went shopping with my best girl friend and she couldn't find anything in her 00 size. She's very thin naturally and would always joke about losing calories if we had to walk a long distance anywhere…guess she was right

    I dont like the look of skinny men but I've realized I prefer it to the opposite. When they do fatten up later in life and decide to look like actual men they'll be my original ideal weight, thus maintaining my attraction alongside their sexy, definitely a win

    Thank you Dr. J for shedding light on this issue.

    (of all your blog posts this is the one you were prepared to be roasted on. Lol)

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      You know I wear a kevlar around these parts, i'm always ready to be roasted. I wrote a post about how I think Black women are beautiful and the response was, "So you wrote one post and all is forgiven, nah f*ck you." After that, I knew that there would not be anymore days without my kevlar.

      • The Guy

        Fat girls always like tall skinny dudes lol.

        • Yoles

          tall skinny dudes like fat girls… those are the dudes all up in my face.. chasing me down the street and asking me all kinds of inappropriate questions…97.34% of the men i have ever been with have been tall and skinny..

    • Starita34

      "(of all your blog posts this is the one you were prepared to be roasted on. Lol)"

      LMAO!!! Right!?

  • http://www.WisdomIsMisery.com WisdomIsMisery

    I'm slim, 5'10, 160 on a good day, so I can relate to all of these but two really hit home…

    5. People assume you can always find your size – My natural inseam is 31. Do you know how impossible it is to find a 31?!? So either I can flood and rock the 30 or I can have my pants bunch up at the bottom with a 32. Basically, if I really want my ish to look good I have to get it tailored. Every. Single. Time.

    9. Some people (of the opposite sex) just don’t like you at all – Word. Like I said before, on a good day I'm 160. My "walk around" wait is closer to 155. When I purposely bulk up, like when I'm going to Miami, I might top out at around 170. It's funny when I hear women who are 5'1, 110 scream "I CANT DATE NO MAN SMALLER THAN 6'3, 225." In other words, some women are the same way with their vision of men – we should all be built like football players – that some men are with women – they should all be built like video vixens. Amusing but I respect the game.

    It's funny because when I get with these small women and run up in it like a crash dummy, they're running all across the bed screaming bloody murder and calling on Jesus and everything Holy they're expectations don’t always match the reality. I mean I’m slim but I can sling 300 pounds around at the gym. I’m pretty sure I can handle someone who weighs 110.

    Another thing I hate is that people assume you’re naturally in shape because you’re slim. No MF-er, I hit the gym one to two hours a day. There is a such thing as out of shape slim people. Please dont discount my work ethic. I can eat whatever I want too but I dont. That annoys me to no end. Respect the gym hustle. Please and thanks.

    • http://www.becauseimwrite.com muze

      that WHOLE last paragraph.

      i run almost everyday, mostly because i enjoy it. and even having gained 10 pounds since last summer, people see me running and question why on earth i'm doing so because i'm "already in shape." ummm…. please leave me alone and Respect The Gym Hustle!

      oh and i have girlfriends that are tiny like that and yet date men 6'3 200+. i don't get it. i'm tall so i feel i'm justified. haha. but if you're barely over five feet… someone 5'10 is STILL much bigger than you. women. lol

      • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

        I wish I could love running I really really do. When people say that its soooo crazy to me, how do you love running??? I have a friend who runs when shes's stressed 0_o I would rather do Pilates all day than run….pass some of the runners crack that you're on down to me!

        • http://www.becauseimwrite.com muze

          LOL i run when i'm stressed too! it's relaxing. you can meditate, zone out, listen to music, and just let your legs carry you wherever. that's also why i like running outside. once you get into a comfortable stride, it doesn't even feel like exercise.

    • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

      5 10 160? wow son… I cant imagine goin back to 160. Im 5'11"-6ft and 185-190 depending on the week. I wanna be 180 though but no smaller than 175. 160 tho? Nikka u hongry! lolol

      Jokes, I dig tho

      • http://www.WisdomIsMisery.com WisdomIsMisery

        Word? Joke on WIM? That's what's hot in the streets? Yo, my 4-4 make sho all yo kids dont gro, son!

        *claps like Kevin Hart in 40 Year Old Virgin*

        But fam, how you gon be 5'11" – 6ft? #PleaseRespond. You are one or the other. I thought only females rocked with the "I'm 5'5 AND THREE-QUARTERS" swag.

        SHOTTAS! Boo-ya-kah-boo-ya-kah!

        • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

          lOLOL it depends on the day my G.

          I would tell Tunde to cosign but he was at least 6ft 9 when I met son at the Greek Picnic. He denies this but son!! lololol so anyone shorter than him is a midget hahahaha

      • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

        i feel bad now. we weigh about the same (i'm about 5 pounds heavier) but i got like 6" on you.

    • @Top5DOA

      Man i'm 5'10" and some change (Yep i said and some change) and mid 160s and wear a size 31 inseam too … Thee worst … Tailoring on Deck.

      But yeah, Ladies don't get it twisted … We works it out in the gym and unless ur 180, you're not too far removed from getting suplexed and dug out.

      • Starita34

        I really wonder if men have any idea how much women weigh for real…we been lying to ya so long you believe that every chick is 120 lol like how we ya'll been telling us all for years that 6 inches is really 9 inches, got our perception all effed up. Mariah Carey is about 5'9" 180-and she doesn't even have thighs and booty meat, ya'll talk like 180 is just gargantuan. You can handle 180, I'm sure.

        • Tash

          It really depends on race. It's been proven that Blacks in general have heavier bone density and muscle mass. Which is why the whole BMI scale is flawed for non-Whites, esp Blacks and Asians. Asians are generally even lighter than Caucasians, so they'd always be deemed underweight according to the BMI, and the opposite is true to Blacks.

          So, theoretically, you can put up 3 different woman who weights 180, across three different races, and the % fat and their aesthetics will be drastically different.

          Many black women will claim that most ppl think they weigh a good 10-20 less than what they actually do based on appearance.

          So, actual poundage is flawed at times. % body fat and central obesity is a better predictor of overall health and wellness.

        • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

          Mariah Carey is 5'9, we've already talked about weight before on here, but her weight also fluctuates. Most guys can tell when Mariah has put on a little weight. However, Mariah has been as thin as 140 lbs before and nobody really took note of that. A few years back I think she was starving herself because people kept saying she was 180 lbs. This right here is where sometimes women who are trying to find solidarity need to shut the hell up. For example, Mariah knows she's 180 lbs, and maybe you know that too, but saying, "Mariah Carey is a 180 lbs and most guys think she's skinny." OK… do you really think Mariah wants people saying that about her? I know you ain't mean no harm, but stop trying to pull people into weight conversations when they don't want to be there themselves.

          Anyway, personally, i'm a good judge of weight. I just understand the differences between fat and muscle and that it weighs differently. There's no evidence here to suggest that men don't know either.

          Lastly, your comment has nothing to do with the post today. This post isn't about if men know how much women weigh, it's about painpoints of people who struggle with being called, "skinny" or "need to eat." Regardless, is it possible to be 5'1 and 130 lbs? Yes, that doesn't make you skinny though, that makes you normal.

          I kind of feel like people saying they skinny like brown skin people say they light skin.

        • Starita34

          Oh, I gotta stay on topic now? I was responding to @Top5DOA who said "unless you're 180" you can get handled by him (a slim guy). And tangents add comments, I'd think you'd be cool with that.

          And you may be a good judge of weight, but I'd say most men aren't. #ThatIsAll

          There you go not being average again.

    • GirlSixx is ChloeRay

      "Like I said before, on a good day I’m 160. My “walk around” wait is closer to 155."

      Well Damn!! Not trying to be funny but what does that even look like on a man of your stature (height)? *MentallyTrying2GetAVisual*

      • http://www.WisdomIsMisery.com WisdomIsMisery

        Ha. This shows that women's views are skewed too. *side eyes Starita*

        Ummm, Ginuwine (old school) and Trey Songz (new school) are prob around 5'10 – 6 foot-ish and 160 or so. You'd be surprised how small most these cats are #inreallife. A lot of actors are smaller than me. Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, etc. I'm taller and prob weigh more than both.

        If you're into UFC, GSP is about 5'10, 170.

        • Starita34

          No doubt, men's heights/weights always confound me. Ya'll spout it off all the time like it means something. Not to me. WIM, you could tell me that you weigh 220 and I wouldn't blink an eye, those measurements mean nothing to me. I've seen your pics and you're in grrrreat shape. My eyes are all the information that I need, the actual stats have no bearing.

          My brother in law called himself short this week. Gave me pause. I'd never paid attention. Turns out he's 5'7", I'm taller than him in heels. He's been around for like 8 years. Never noticed. #Shrug

        • GirlSixx is ChloeRay

          Point taken.

  • http://Twitter.com/InAnimateAlpha Animate

    We still have the skinny folks meeting at 6 today right?

    Being skinny is not the business at times. It took me like 10 years to gain a measly 5 pounds and keep it. My body just burns through stuff. I cant find pants half the time. And shirts are piffy depending on where I get the from. Being short on top of that just adds to the list.

  • Humble_One

    Thick guy problems > Skinny guy problems

    You guys got it easy. I'm self conscience about wearing shorts because my legs are big. My mother even talks about legs. Skinny guys can also find clothes way easier. For guys like me with a chest and shoulders a lot of designers dont make comfortable clothes. The pants are tight in the crotch and shirt are tight around the shoulder, arms, and armpits. People don't expect skinny dudes to always be able to lift all type of heavy ish with no problem. My kind has that problem. It sucks because I know no matter how much I run or do cardio I will always be built like a running back.

    • Hugh Jazz

      I know I'm always going to have a Barry Sanders build, but I'm not complaining. There are worse body types.

      I can relate to women buying jeans though. When you have to buy size 38 jeans so your thighs and butt can fit, but you have a 32-33 inch waist, it makes buying jeans (and slacks for that matter) difficult. Buying suits aren't any fun either.

  • http://twitter.com/chizelley chizelley

    I'm not extra skinny but I'm on the slimmer side. What I hate is that people always feel free to make comments/observations about your weight: "Oh you're so small, I want to be your size", "Oh you don't eat", etc. I guess people think of them as compliments and that its okay bc I'm smaller buut if I thought it was okay to make the same comments to a larger person: "Oh you're so large, I hope I don't eat too much so I don't look like you", ish would hit the fan lol

  • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

    " Is being skinny going to bring back my Uncle Charles, dog? "

    This murked me.

    I went through a skinny phase. at one point I weighed 140lbs. That wind is NO JOKE! I had to put all my books in my bookbag goin to class so I didnt get blown away!

    This post is hilare!

    • Humble_One

      "I went through a skinny phase. at one point I weighed 140lbs. That wind is NO JOKE! I had to put all my books in my bookbag goin to class so I didnt get blown away!"

      When I stopped playing football I dropped down to 155. I can say that women are not kind to smaller guys. It bruises the ego to have a woman say "you are so small". #pause

  • The Guy

    s/o to Dr J for reppin for the skinny dudes lol i used to get called all types of stuff like Ethiopian and when they really wanted to go in it was Shawn Stockman (the dude from boys II men) haha

  • http://panamaenrique.wordpress.com Malik

    Tupac Shakur agreed with our plight.

    'And they say: "how do you survive weighing 165

    In a city where the skinny n!ggas die?" – Straight Ballin

    'Skinny n!ggas throw the d*ck well' – Let Em Have it

  • difficultisnotimposs

    I love skinny guys.

    • Starita34

      Is there duct tape on your mouth in your avi?!?

      • difficultisnotimposs

        LOL. No, in the picture the way that I'm tilting my head caused the rest of my face to get cut off due to how small these pictures show up on here. This is my first time blog commenting and using gravatar.com so I have to keep that picture up until I can find one that won't get cut off when its scaled down. :-( it sucks that it looks like I have duct tape on my mouth though. Lol

        • Starita34

          *whew* Girl, I thought you were letting your freak flag fly ALL the way! lol ;-)

        • http://www.becauseimwrite.com muze

          @starita LOL me too. i was worried.

      • difficultisnotimposs

        I went back to the gravatar website and tried to crop the picture to move it over and make the picture show up bigger but it still cut off some of my face :-( . Does it still have the duct tape look?

        • Starita34

          Nope, much clearer-and welcome to the light :-)

      • difficultisnotimposs

        Lol. Cool. Thank you!

  • Keimei22

    This post spoke to my heart. LOL I'm 5'7 and 117lbs. This is the most I've weighed in my entire life. I've heard every single skinny joke imaginable. I used to get upset but now that I'm 25 I just brush it off or I come back with a fat joke. Most people get mad when I hit them with the "when are you going to stop eating or you have enough fat to share". Also when I hit the gym everyone looks at me like "why is that skinny girl lifting weights". They are amazed when I can push 170 on the leg press. I'm skinny, strong and loving it.

  • Hugh Jazz

    I can't relate. I've only been under 200 pounds once in the last fifteen years.

    • Humble_One

      I'm trying to get like you. I want to float b/w 195-205 and 10% body fat. I need to get my protein intake up.

  • http://hazardoussentiments.tumblr.com Kriola

    @cynicaloptimist81 yes gurl! That avi is a thirst trap that I sure as hell fell for and commeted on yesterday! …the guys stay setting out traps! Taking about how they exercise all the time and they lay it down good smh!

    • cynicaloptimist81

      Now you're gonna make me go hunt your comment down, LMBO! Cause girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl…all I can do is shake my head and quicken thinking bout that avi, LOL. #jesuskeepmenearthecross

      The SBM fellas know what they're doing, lol…

  • http://twitter.com/MzNinaSoul NinaFontaine

    This is hilarious to me! I remember in elementary school I had a crush on this guy but of course you made fun of the people you like then and I called him "skinny bone Jones".

    As someone stated above I love slim/skinny men – ok to be exact – 6-6'2ft 190-210. THLD! (you'll figure it out)

  • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

    after reading some of these comments i really don't feel too bad about being 195 now.

    • http://twitter.com/MzNinaSoul NinaFontaine

      you shouldn't!

    • @Top5DOA

      195 is dangnear NFL worthy … ur good man (unless you're 6'6").. smh … I hope u didn't say anything about being skinny???

      *Sends Birdcall to the Real skinny cats*

      • http://biggerthomas.wordpress.com MadScientist7

        yea so about that. i'm 6'6" lol i figure if i could gain like 5-10 pounds i'll be good.

  • QueenBinthestreets..

    Haven't read the comments yet but I'm sure they're gold like always!

    @ Dr.J "you're not average" I love how you threw that in there from that convo a coiple posts ago lol.

    I'm not skinny so I can't relate now to any of these "reasons to hate being skinny". But I used to be really skinny when I was younger. My nickname growing up used to be Skinny Minnie or shrimp. Then in Middle school puberty hit and everyone was getting butt cheeks and b.oobs and I remained skinny and just got chubby cheeks :(

    I know being skinny used to make feel insecure about not having any "goods" so I used to do tremendously ridiculous things so it appeared that I had some sort of "body".! Lol

    It wasn't until I turned like 17-18 got on BC and started working at MickeyD's that I started to get meat on me and get a lil b.ooty and b.oobs and thank God! Cause I used to wish everynight that I would get just a lil bit thicker and stuff would grow….I personally would NEVER go back to being skinny, I love my curves too much!

    But skinny girls do tend to come out with some well proprotioned bodies when they do get them. I know a few girls who were skinny as shhhh they're whole life, like damn near stick figures and they didn't get curves until they had a baby.This might not be preventable but this is why I plan on slimming waaay down when that time to have kids come cause I'll be damned if stuff starts spreading and I look a mess.

    But enough about me, what is this dumb aye myth that I hear spewed sometimes about skinny girls being the only ones able to take the D? My male friend says that all the time. It sounds ridick to me but has anyone else heard that?

  • http://musicmakesmehigh.wordpress.com Reecie

    did this fool say " I’ll run for the bus, some p*ssy, and maybe some chicken…"
    LMAO!

    but yea cosign on everyone trying to feed you. or assuming you don't have problems with weight. They might not be the same problems other people have but you still have em. People don't assume I'm hungry all the time though, its kinda obvious because I'm ALWAYS eating. I'm a grazer.

    for many years I couldn't give blood and I still dont' active the passenger air bag in my mom's car -__-

  • Andressa

    It's been a LONG time SBM massive, but i'm breaking my silence today.

    I can't relate to this post but I thought i'd complain about something else. Being average. That's right. I'm neither fat, nor skinny. I'm average. Not thin enough for the white boys, not thick enough for my black/latin brother's either lol. I know someone is side-eyeing me for this comment but seriously i've had the 'you just fell short' wind blown at me many times before (stfu if you're about to comment on my actual height too).

    What really made me roll was: "And I think I said this before, but people find accents to be “sexy,” some women will say, “you only like her because she has an accent.” They won’t be around for how many jokes she gets about not being able to speak English correctly" <—–THIS.

    How many times i've been asked where r u from and I say Canada and get -______- <–that face.

    Great post. Eat some beans and rice!

    • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

      yea that side eye was from me, lol.

      Welcome back!

      • Andressa

        Skreeeeetz! U would! look—I can't deal with u.

  • http://babblesworld25.blogspot.com A

    I'm still reading but I had to stop and comment on the car air bag struggle. It's REAL for me. I have to sit with stuff in the seat with me in order to keep the air bag on.

    *reads the rest of list*

  • Biggregg

    1st time leaving a comment. Been reading blog for last couple months. I happen to be 6'6" & under 200 lbs and over 30. Pops keeps telling me I wil fill in but I'm still waiting. I eat whatever I want whenever I want & also find it incredibly difficult shopping. I use to hated being skinny but not so much these days. I'm healthy with no physical problems & I have no kids & I'm single but I live in LA, where skinny dudes get no love. Almost all of the points above are correct. Chicks are hear hate on skinny ninjas. I love me a thick woman & when I get them I hear no complaints, except, that my hip bone is sharp…

    • http://musicmakesmehigh.wordpress.com Reecie

      yeah that sharp hip bone situation is dangerous.

    • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

      Welcome you sharp hipbone ass nikka!

      lol nah seriously in High School heard the same ish.. cant win for losin yakno?

  • http://Thewhittiest.wordpress.com TheWhittiest

    Lol- this was funny :)

  • @Top5DOA

    "I hear no complaints, except, that my hip bone is sharp…"

    The sharp hip bone struggle is REAL!!!

  • chrissy

    I still refuse to feel sorry for this issue, when i eat one sprinkle off a donut and I needs to run around the WORLD twice or im not fitting my pants!…..So cry me a river with this;-).

  • http://babblesworld25.blogspot.com A

    I am 26, 4'8 and 99lbs. you do NOT want to play hide and seek with me, you'll never find me

    I can relate to everything on this list

    1- when I'm with my friends and ppl ask me if I eat they say "more than we do"

    2- I tweeted about my weight once and ppl were in my mentions like "eat this and go straight to bed, I bet the weight will stay on you" or "if you ate my mama's *insert any ethnic food here* you'd gain weight overnight"

    3- I mentioned my air bag struggle and I'll add that I've NEVER been able to give blood. the lady told me once, "if you can gain at least 10lbs within the next hour you can come back". needless to say I never went back

    4- we're also expected to be in shape and healthy, automatically. Uhm, my boobs are big and even running up the steps tires me out. when ppl want me to actually run for something I think about how bad I want what it is I'm running for and decide if it's worth me being out of breath when I get there.

    5- can we NOT talk about this one? I read some of the above comments and a lot of the women wear a size 8 shoe, I wear a size 4 shoe and most dress shoes run a size 5 at the smallest. jeans are never just right in both the waist and length, they're always one or the other and I just have to make do. I haven't grown since middle school so I have jeans that are 5 and 6 years old that I can still wear

    6- the wind told me one day while checking the mail "bish you walking too slow" and blew me to my mail box

    7- whenever I try to defend myself by stating an issue I deal with (daily) b/c I'm skinny I get hit with what you mentioned in numb. 8

    8- so how come NOBODY told me that since I'm skinny I was automatically exempt from paying my student loans? oh okay

    9- with this one ppl try to make me feel better by saying, "but he can toss you during sex"

    10- I don't get compared to celebs I just get people saying I look younger than what I really am.

    my 11 yo nephew is taller and weighs more than I do.

    and if one more person says "I bench press more than you" or tries to pick me up like I'm some kind of toy I might scream

    • @Top5DOA

      Awwwwwwwwwwwwww You're on some Dwarf type stuff … Cute

      • http://babblesworld25.blogspot.com A

        you know, I checked that out, and I am officially a dwarf. they give out scholarships for that but you have to have some type of medical defect to go along with your dwarfism and I don't

  • Elle

    Yeah being "skinny" is NOT the business especially on windy days. I had a gust of wind knock me off my feet once, in front of a bunch of people and it was very embarrassing. I'm 5'5" and currently at my heaviest weight of 117lbs and I worked VERY HARD for it.

    Oh and I LOOOOOVE lean guys!

  • http://www.therealslimjackson.com Slimuel L. Jackson

    I identified with this post in high school. Now I just bulldoze sh*t.

  • Beef Bacon

    Never been skinny or fat. Still have issues finding clothes that fit, still get hungry in the middle of the night, still get told by people I have no idea what being skinny or fat feels like. As if…I think I can understand everyone's plight for real….

    Seems like we all can't win for losing….lol. Imma just be happy with my lean beefy self.

    Nice post!

  • http://www.twitter.com/SukiChillinEsq NowSayItWithMe

    What the actual… you know what? I can't. If I had a dollar cuz who really wants a dime or nickel for every single time I heard someone make a "But you're skinny" comment, I'd eat everyday for a few years… maybe a decade even. I can't begin to explain the struggles of Skinny Life. People think we're not out here TRYING to get a pound or 5 back on us. We hear your complaints. We really do BUT you better make an appointment with my metabolism and ask it how it keeps me "in shape".

    Boys and girls, please. Let the rumors be clear:

    - I love food. I wake up at 4 out of hunger. I go back to sleep at 6 because I'm satisfied & full. I have more recipe books than you know. I'm constantly thinking of food if it's not… other things.

    - I did NOT run track or do any sports. I'm a lean mean eating machine. I'm just built to look long & tough. Ford.

    - For the past few months, I've gotten "Michelle Obama" because 2520s don't know any more famous black people. Thanks (._.) really.

    - Do you know how hard it is to find your size when you're my size? Everything fits strange.. :( thanks for the reminder..

    That's all. Thanks Dr. J. Shiieet.

  • Clint B

    Hell, I grew up being skinny and now I'm trying to reach 180 just so i can say that I am finally normal… LOL!!!

  • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

    Does Maury walk across the stage and sits in the far right chair…

    THE RESULTS ARE IN!!!

    In the case of 5'1.5" 125-130 lb, cynicaloptimist81…

    She said that most of her weight comes from her hips, butt and hair. After reviewing the photographic evidence provided to me.

    You are not skinny. You're normal for a person of your height. If you weighed anymore you'd be a plumper. If you were skinny, you wouldn't be holding your weight from your hips and butt. I think you are looking at things from a Black standpoint of view to be honest. In most households in our community, you probably need more meat on your bones, but in reality, they just trying to plump you up. You're just find the way you are. (Provided your hair doesn't weigh like 25 lbs, in that case, go read last Friday's post.) When I think back to all my friends who are 4'9 to 5'2 they all seem a bit frail but in reality, most women have thick legs and trunks because their heigh and weight requires them to do so. You'd be skinny if it looked like your body was going to blow away in the wind and never return, but you look normal for your size.

    Not skinny, not fat, just right.

    • @Top5DOA

      SMH … I thought so … Out here crying wolf!!!

    • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

      Cynical officially needs more people until further notice. smfh…

      lolol

      • cynicaloptimist81

        "I think you are looking at things from a Black standpoint of view to be honest. In most households in our community, you probably need more meat on your bones, but in reality, they just trying to plump you up."

        Imma need those lines to stand out for those who question my judgment, LOL…

        And the fact that I didn't bluff and allowed the "one man panel" to decide?! I don't get credit for that?!

        Tough crowd, lol…

    • cynicaloptimist81

      Literally laughed out loud @ the Maury walk and the word, "plumper"!!!

      FTR, the hair bit was a joke, lol. Those locs are real though…and they are indeed heavy…especially when wet or styled-up.

      I can get with the black standpoint aspect of your assessment…I guess. The next person that calls me skinny will be directed to you for correction, LOL.

      *looks at skinny parts again* These skinny calves and ankles are NOT normal though, lol…I don't care what you say, lol…

      AND…I appreciate the focus in your assessment. You've earned my trust and respect. *daps*

      • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

        My 7th grade sex-ed teacher told me that when a girl has skinny calves and ankles that means she's used to having her legs up in the air. That can happen to anyone. I seen girls who were overweight with that. Some people just have awkward extremities. Have you ever seen a really buff guy with chicken legs?

        • cynicaloptimist81

          What type of off-brand, bootleg sex-ed teacher was this spreading untruth to "the future"?????? LOL! You ain't foolin nobody…

          I get your "skinny leg" point though…

    • http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com Dr. J

      In her defense she didn't send me bathing suit or naked pictures, so the results are only but so conclusive.

      • http://www.streetztalk.net Streetz

        LOL Nah Cynical gets eternal e-daps for submitting to the SBM case study!

        I knew u wasnt "skinny" though and I trust Jays judgement.

        You have locs though? Hmm…. **thinks of next post**

        • http://www.twitter.com/MOTRenaissance Adonis…

          @Streetz

          Could we please dissect Free's A$$ for one more week…?

    • cynicaloptimist81

      Uh oh…just noticed a small error though…substitute "thighs" for "hips" in the Doctor's assessment. My hips are not #winning like that at all, lol…

  • TeaCup

    I'm 5'8 and a size 6…I don't feel skinny, ever really (though not fat). However, in the black community people will constantly give me those 'eyes of concern' when I refuse certain foods or talk about my work out exploits…

    The truth is, I love to eat o_O that's why I take my ass to the gym lol

  • YoungestMILF

    I love skinny men. Its an unhealthy addiction as I am always watching my weight. But yea, y'all are my weakness.

  • Militantsista

    I just have to say that tall thin/skinny guys are great! For some reason they are very well endowed and long!!!

    • ALWAYS L84AD8

      SOME are well endowed. One skinny guy had me call out from work because he was so well endowed. Had my p*!#y in crutches…. I never expected that from him because he was skinny lolololol…boyfriend was hung like a pendulum in a granddaddy clock…. I keeps his number under "Favorites" on my phone…..

      Now don't get me wrong, I like LEAN men, but not JAY JAY from Good Times kinda skinny.

    • Clint B

      Thanks for the props Militansista… It is most appreciated….

  • Melva L. Florance

    Gas-face. That is what I got in 1997. You see my mother is gorgeous, all five of my sisters are gorgeous so naturally I of course grew up knowing I was gorgeous! I worked hard to keep my face beautiful, but went from being "thicker than a snicker!" to "She cute for her size!"

    I have always heard that skinny guys love big women and I was at work one day when a dude that looked like Dennis Rodman (pre-dress) walked in. I start, grinning with my coochie coochie coo face on and got to preening harder than an alley cat (Yes for me, Dennis Rodman pre-dress was sexy; don't judge me).

    He told me quick, "Pull up, I ain't one of them dudes that like big women!" He could have chopped me in the thoke and I wouldn't have been anymore shocked! That was my last skinny man on purpose.

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  • jasmine

    hahahaha… this cracked me up.. I so feel your pain.. I am a skinny BLACK female.. which is the worst.. because everyone expects you to be big as hell because of your race.. but I like skinny guys.. wish black guys liked skinny girls though.. Oh well.. looks like I will be marrying a white guy..

  • http://lovefromgirl.wordpress.com Cassie

    I am having a bad body day. I am hating on myself for being skinny (and the world for making me hate on myself for being skinny) and this made me smile. You get it. Keep being awesome.
    My recent post This is a rant about size. My size.

  • Stephanie

    It’s the day before thanksgiving as I am about to clock out of my long long loooong shift at this grocery store I work at, and a woman asks me, have you tried the pineapple? Is it any sweet? I say to her, sorry I have not cut into a whole pineapple today to know if they’re sweet or not. So she says, Nevermind, it doesn’t look like you would eat pineapple. And I say to her why does it look like I don’t eat pineapple? She says to me that I look so skinny. So I laugh and say, skinny people don’t eat pineapple? Stuttering she then says, I take that back, your young and not many young people eat fruit. I then say, there’s an age limit in order to eat fruit? Then she bullshits about how her kids don’t like to eat fruit. Point being is that you should think before you speak. There is plenty of people daily who are offending others without even acknowledging that they are. Ironically pineapple is my favorite fruit. Happy Thanksgiving to you too Bitch..

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  • skinny& tall

    Beyond being frequently told I look hungry, in need of a sandwich, etc, it kills me that it is ok for random a**holes to interrupt me in the middle of anything I’m doing, to ask “how you get that skinny?” I would never even consider stopping someone who is in the middle of shopping to ask “wow, what’s your secret to being so fat?” Or “have you always been this fat?” Or “mhmmm i bet you spend a lot of time eating Cheetos and ice cream while you watch law and order, huh?”-thatwould get me squashed for sure. The other thing how I really hate? “hey, I have this dress/blouse/jeans I was going to take to goodwill cause I got too fat for it, but then I remembered how skinny you are, so here!…and if you don’t want it, you can take it and donate it” seriously? Just cause you got too fat for that skirt doesn’t mean it will automatically fit me! And I ain’t your errand girl, stop giving me clothes with instructions to drop them off at the place you originally intended to take them!

  • Patricia Ruth Lewis

    I'm 5'4' and 62 years old I weight 106 pounds I have been slight all my LIFE the most I ever weight was 138 pounds and thats because I was pregnant with my daughter when she was born she weight 6 pounds 8oz that was a big baby for me and it was a natural child birth I was told I might have to have a C-Section but I didn't, I too do not like windy days! I'm always eating seems like I never stop eating, all the women in my family are small framed women, Mother, Grandmother ect I like being slight I look nice in my clothes,(was a professional Model back in the day) I remember in High school the boys used to tell me" I had a Volkswagen body on a Cadillac frame" I thought it was too funny! and I really like this one"Yo slim"! or slim goody as it were but, I always said "it's not me that has a problem with being skinny it's other folk that have a problem with me being skinny" Oh well such as life..