30 Things All Men Should Experience by Age 30

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This week Ashley, a SBM reader, shared a non-traditional bucket list from her friend, Zuri F., through our Facebook page. At first, we thought the list was pretty hilarious. Then we realized the list made a lot of sense and it was our duty to share it here with the full SBM Family. Tabernacle! Below are 30 things all men should experience by age 30.

By: Zuri Farngalo

1. Own a passport and have been out the country at least once.

2. Own a tailored piece of clothing.

3. Have a story involving Vegas and/or Miami, drinking, and midgets (Only if you are lucky).

4. Know what type of haircuts work for him you should not still be experimenting (i.e. Donovan McNabb) or know when it’s time to let it go and rock a bald head (LeBron James).

5. Met a woman out of town that you still keep in contact with.

6. Flown to see a woman or flown a woman to see you.

7. Participated in a friend’s wedding.

8.Fallen in love with a stripper even if it was just for one night.

9. Eaten at a restaurant that requires reservations.

10. Know how to tie a tie.

11. Have at least one signature dish you can make.

12. Own a nice watch and a nice pair of shoes (not talking about sneakers).

13. Manscaped at least once to try it ( to what extent that is up to you).

14. Should not still get grossed out by talk about periods, gotten his red wings, and doesn’t mind creating a murder scene.

15. Know what type of woman he can’t deal with.

16. Participated in some physical activity that he had to train for (Marathon, Tough Mudder, 5k, whatever).

17. Purchased flowers for a woman.

18. Made out in public with woman or dance with your partner when nobody else is on the floor and not give a damn who’s watching.

19. Experienced a good cigar.

20. Had a one night stand.

21. Have a savings account, 401k, mutual fund, roth IRA, or investment property etc.( or some combination of the those).

22. Know what side of the street to walk on when walking with a woman.

23. Know that a first date to the movies is dumb as hell.

24. Been to professional sports game/boxing match/MMA fight.

25. Been to a play or ballet.

26. Know how to swim.

27. Went out drinking and skirt chasing to help a friend though a break up.

28. Have helped somebody achieve a goal or better their situation (job referral, tutoring, mentoring, etc.).

29. Have done something extreme (sky dive, bungee jump, be in a bar fight where you’re outnumbered, gone raw dawg on a complete stranger, etc.).

30. Have been involved in some form or type of ‘group’ sexual activity.

If you’re about that life, share your score below in an XX/30 format. If you’re really about that life, share the exact ones from the list you’ve already accomplished. Do you have a personal bucket list? What is our list missing? What is a list of things all women should experience by age 30?

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  • RealGoesRight

    26/30.

    3. Have a story involving Vegas and or Miami, Drinking, and Midgets (Only if you are lucky).

    4. Know what type of haircuts work for him you should not still be experimenting (ie Donovan McNabb) or know when it’s time to let it go and rock a bald head (LeBron James).

    14.Should not still get grossed out by talk about periods, Gotten his red wings, and doesn’t mind creating a murder scene.

    16.Participated in some physical activity that he had to train for (Marathon, Tough Mudder, 5k, whatever).

    Those are the 4 I DIDN'T do.

    Don't judge me. You don't know my life.
    My recent post Books, Rhymes, and Life

  • Well Enuff

    I've still got to do 2 and 19. Don't ask about 3 lol.

    • InsomniaPoet

      Please tell us about 3! LMAO

      • Well Enuff

        I was in Miami at a club I won't name, and there was a bathroom attendant making fun of some little person, who we'll call "James" just walked in. I told the attendant that the guy's probably been little for a long time and has a 1001 comebacks for anything you say. Sure enough, the attendant keeps on, and the little dude rips him to shreds (verbally) and we all laughed about it. James told me and my boys that he was in VIP and invited us up. We got up there and he had a harem of women up there, so we just partied it up there till the place closed down. That's as far as I'm going with that. The rest of that story encompasses another number.

  • Melissa

    What does red wings mean? Does it mean what I think it means? If so, yuck. LOL!

    • rachel

      yes… its does… "create a murder scene" blood everywhere

  • Peyso

    I'm missing #8.

  • Uncle Hugh, BP

    24 of 30. Missed 6, 8, 14, 19, 29 and 30. And with the exception of maybe 19 and 29, I have no intentions of experiencing any of those things.

  • dr jvc

    28 / 30 … thank you & good night

    missing #s
    8. stripper? not one for window shopping. if i can’t touch it, don’t want it.
    19. don’t smoke, never have…

  • Sith King Jordan

    16/30…gotta try that skydiving.

  • The CPT

    At age 35 I can say I have done all of those and I will substitute military for #16.
    Oh wait…no #18 but I have said some pretty nasty things while dancing that resulted in making out elsewhere.

    Half of life down and I've had a good run.

  • http://singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery WisdomIsMisery

    28/30

    The Have Nots:

    3 (might have been with a midget or a very, very short woman, long story, but it wasn't Vegas or Miami)
    11 – don't have a *signature dish

    • Bree

      Wis you are not ready for marriage until you have a “signature dish” you can make really well with nobody getting violently ill. lol

      • http://singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery WisdomIsMisery

        Actually me and the Queen are looking into taking cooking classes together. Thought that was a pretty cool idea and one we both benefit from. I can cook small things, I just dont have a "signature dish," which I would consider a full course meal. I can throw something together but that's nothing to brag about.

        • Bree

          Taking cooking classes together is sexy….yaaaay Wis *smile*

  • HolidayNC

    25/30

    Can't say the following:
    3. Have a story involving Vegas and or Miami, Drinking, and Midgets (Only if you are lucky). (Never been to either with the fellas, only my ex)
    7. Participated in a friend’s wedding. (been to a few, but wasn't involved)
    19. Experienced a good cigar. (I don't smoke… like, at all.)
    29. Have done something extreme (sky dive, bungee jump, be in a bar fight where you’re outnumbered, gone raw dawg on a complete stranger, etc.). (WORKING on this one… skydiving here I come!)
    30. Have been involved in some form or type of ‘group’ sexual activity

    • Laney

      Doesn't smoke and no orgies? That's.. rare. Impressed.

  • NipseysKlub

    Dang, I guess my life is close to complete.

    28/30

    Still on the list

    3. Have a story involving Vegas and/or Miami, drinking, and midgets (Only if you are lucky). – Been to Vegas but did not get a chance to experience the midgets and drinking

    6. Flown to see a woman or flown a woman to see you. – I tend to keep my interactions locals.

  • Zuri F

    I made the list on my lunch break when the last of my immediate circle turned 31. It was meant to be light and fun so please don’t take it serious, but I do have all the things checked off.

  • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com Tristan

    24/30…but since I am 24 can do one a year

    1- Been to Canada but even I wont count that (age 27 tops)

    3-i’ll do Miami, dont care to ever go to vegas honestly (age 26)

    7-guess i need to expand my circle, im probably the only marriage minded one in my team (age 30)

    16-this is on my to do list…maybe 2014 (age 25)

    19-dont smoke but if someone offered a quality cigar i might yolo that one time (age 28)

    26-i can swim kinda…well float (age 24)

  • Bree

    how many men on here even know what "manscape" is?????? show of hands……..

    • NipseysKlub

      ::Looking around the room, stepping up to the plate, putting my right hand up::

      • Bree

        lol……..thats whats up Nipseys……I'm glad somebody is boldly steppin to the plate….I know there are lots more…they just choose to be silent. It's cool though, I know they are raising their hands too in their heads….lol

    • Leroy

      (raising hand) I mine with a low taper fade!!! LOL

    • Leroy

      (raising hand) I mine with a low taper fade!!! LOL

    • dr jvc

      * raising my hand * when visiting beaches on various European vacations, my swim gear had to be stylish so some "manscaping" was appropriate. LOL

  • Bree

    Things on my bucket list is to:
    1. Go on a nice long caribbean vacation or cruise All By Myself – which I plan to do next year. *yay*
    2. Do an entire set at Karaoke like I'm really performing a concert.
    3. Fly a plane
    4. Waterski
    5. skydive
    6. ski and snowboard
    7. Own & Operate my own business

    • GirlSixx

      Girl you can do all of that right now!!! Them LivingSoclal and Groupon deals got people out her YOLO'ing. :)

      • Bree

        GirlSixx those are all things I Plan to do before I die ;)

      • Bree

        Although flying a plane will take a while, as of right now I know 2 people who have taken flying lessons and know how to fly so thats a work in progress. There is a place in Bowie MD that has flying lessons. It's approximately $6,500.00 to $7,500 to get a pilots license. They are extremely expensive. Soon as I'm closer to six figures (or hit the lottery) I'm in there like swimwear. ;)

    • bellatrice1

      I feel your #1. That's on my list too.
      My recent post Answers to Your Common Dating Questions

  • Melissa

    Err number 1? Who the hell doesn’t own a passport?!

    Oh I forget…….Americans! So strange lol!

  • James

    The passport thing is overrated. Why? For first timers it’s damn expensive and if you aren’t planning an out of country trip why do you need one? If you think it’s not a big deal to purchase look at the state of ny. I’m about to renew my DL ny state gives you the option to buy an enhanced DL. It doubles as a passport and a DL for less than half of the cost of a passport. I was gonna get a PP in college until I saw the price and then realized I’m not gonna use this anytime soon. And I was right.

    • http://singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery WisdomIsMisery

      I see what you're saying about cost, but I do think every man should have a passport on hand. Can't tell you how many trips I've had that were last second "hey, found a good deal. want to go to XX?" versus how many friends in my circle we've left behind because they don't have a passport. It's like a condom – better to have and not need than to need and not have.

      • Bree

        True that Wis. Plus u can use a passport for ID. In NY u have that option now but they don't have that in other states yet. U may get invited to a destination wedding in the Caribbean or a relative of yours may want you to be the best man at their destination wedding. No passport and your sol.
        I can relate to being "left behind" because I didn't have a passport. Couldn't see my friend in the Army stationed in Germany because I didn't have a passport. And she paid for the flight.
        But if u have that option to get the DL that can be used as a passport too do that. Passports don't cost much at all. I may or may not have had a job when I got mine.

    • Taylor

      Stop it James. Just stop.

      A passport only costs like $100!!!!!

      And exactly where are you going to travel to with your driver's license slash passport card with the exception of like Canada? Where will they put those customs and immigration stamps?

      I understand that you have no desire to own a passport which is fine, but your excuses for not wanting one are questionable at best.

    • BlueSteele

      We have that in Michigan. It's really designed to allow for easy access for driving over to Canada for places (like Detroit) where the border is close. That's the sham because if you're really travelling abroad you still need a regular book. Better to pay the 100-150, have it for 10 years and be ready when one of those Living Social Escapes deals pop up, lol.

  • James

    How about a more practical thing a man should know have done by 30: concede to the at fact you are no techie at all. As an editor I laugh when guys try to explain why they needed to buy a new tv. It was cheap son. Please don’t go into the specs. Ditto for how the Internet works. Cell phones and cameras. You only bought it cuase it didn’t require a second mortgage. It ain’t enhancing a damn thing.

    I do think in light of the way things have gone over the last decade some of the things on this list are a tad bit financially dumb to do. Traveling to another country isn’t cheap if you can do it fine but I dont see it as something that easy to do such as driving across the US. I’ve heard that’s a eye opener and way more cheaper than going to London on a budget.

    • Lady T

      James, have you ever bought a bottle at the club? Ever bought an Iphone full/half price? Ever paid for a large flat screen TV? Or what about buying some Jordans?

      If the answer is yes, then you can afford to go to another country. All I see is you making excuses, possibly because of how you feel about that.

      If you don't like tio travel, that's fine, however, it's not too far overpriced for anyone to do it, if they just save up (like $50-$100 a month, yes it is possible). People spend their money on what they deem is important. Obviously traveling abroad is not for you. I will say, that it is quite an eye opener (especially if you go outside the touristy areas). Anywho, you can always go on cruises, which are especially cheap this time of year and visit several Caribbean countries without a passport.

      However, make your own list, do that roadtrip, and see how you like that.

      • InsomniaPoet

        What Caribbean countries don't require a passport?? In this day & age you only going to Puerto Rico with that mentality…

        • GirlSixx

          I'm wondering the same thing?

        • BlueSteele

          "In this day & age you only going to Puerto Rico with that mentality…"

          Morning funny!

      • DeKeLa

        I have traveled to other countries, and the cost comparison is NOT the same to buying sneakers or a TV. If you travel to a country where the exchange rate is not in your favor, considering Air fare, lodging, meals and spending money, it is not in the same price bracket.

        And you need your passport to travel to Caribbean countries, as you do for all international travel

        • Southerngyrl_

          It all adds up. The money I save from not splurging on electronics, bags, purses, shoes etc can and has been used for international trips. I usually go on guided tours as well, which costs more. It depends on what you make a priority. I always say, some women love Coach purses and designer shoes. I love traveling, period.

    • The CPT

      To be real with you…London on a budget cost me $1100 dollars a few years back and that included airfare and spending cash. I had a friend on the other end that put me up. Traveling can be done on a budget if it is planned and researched carefully. It also matters who your connections are. Contrary to most Americans (and I am one) beliefs, the world is pretty friendly compared to what we are fed in the media. I have had people from other countries offer a place to stay if I ever were to visit and still have Army buddies from around the globe willing to lend a pillow. Gotta think a little bigger than that, bruh.

    • dr jvc

      travelling to other countries is about seeing the world and exposing yourself to other cultures; getting a very different viewpoint of American life. i leave the country 2x a year – minimum; i'm not talking Canada or the Caribbean, either… although Montreal & Vancouver are great destinations. LOL Considering the car notes some folks carry, an international excursion is well worth the investment.

      • Lady T

        +1 on this entire comment!!!

        SN: I found out how much a acquaintance was paying for a Honda, damn near made me choke on my drink. One thing, good credit will get you far.

        For international travel, if you want to do it cheaply, don't go to Europe for the most part (however London and Paris can be done cheaply just got to be persistent in checking flights and hotels). I love to travel where the exchange rate is in my favor. Saying hello to Panama, Guatemala, Aruba, and Argentina in the near future.

  • Jupiter Calhoun

    28/30; I’m only missing 16 and 30. I kind of feel like those two go should hand in hand.

  • J. Crawford

    I've got 23/30 completed and still got the following left: 2, 3, 19, 30, 7, 6, 29

  • DeKeLa

    27/30. Most of these completed before 25! lol

    Missing : 3, 13 , 26. I was in Vegas, but there was no ,midgets in sight… I got some time.

  • Curtis

    1 , 6 , and 14(Will never happen) are the only ones I haven’t done…

  • Eliblue

    I think that every man should know how to drive a stick shift(manual transmission) car.

    Peace!!!!!!

    • InsomniaPoet

      totally agree!

    • BlueSteele

      YES! I think everyone should know this in general, but I'm a car head.

  • Larry

    27-ish/ 30, lol.

    Good list

  • larnelw

    28/30

    Missing:

    #19 – I refuse to smoke
    #26 – Sadly i cannot swim

    *sidenote* I see very few people mention having not down #30….I see I'm in the company of some freaky mofos lol

  • Cris

    I guess I am just a bit concerned that this article would encourage “raw dawg” sex, and earning your “red wings”. While having sex with a girl on her period (with protection) is relatively safe, neither “raw dawg” sex or “red wing” cunnilingus (unprotected) is safe, as the potential for STI and other infections is much higher. So while I think it is a good message to encourage men to stop being afraid of a woman’s menstruation, it is unwise to encourage “red wings” without a dental dam. And while adventure is a great suggestion, let’s do it safely. And as for “raw dawg-ing” it, Won’t jump out of a plane without a parachute, so don’t have sex without a condom, unless you are conscious of the repercussions. So please, use protection. Especially as Black men, we have to take care of ourselves and the females we’re involved with.

  • jdoubleu

    Does a 4'11 ninja count as a midget?

    Haven't done 19, 25 or 30.

    Far as the passport thing, I definitely see the point in the cost. But as I've gotten older, I can't even rock w/ people who don't have a passport. It's an entire world to see and I wanna have great stories to tell my grandkids. It's only but so many Miami/Vegas/LA/NY stories you can have before they all start to blend together.
    My recent post Ghosts of girlfriends past: 5 things I learned from my exes

    • That's My Story

      LMBO! As a 4'11" female, after laughing at your question, I must attempt to take some offense to comparing us to midgets! You are considered a midget if you are under 4'9". But nice try on trying to up your scores on that bucket list!… Still LMBO!!

  • InsomniaPoet

    Last cruise I went on I needed my [passport for Bahamas and Mexico…Never been to Haiti…I mean maybe if you cruised prior to 9/11….but eh maybe that's on a private yacht or something…cuz Carnival, Royal Caribbean and Norwegian want ya passport sir.

  • guest245

    ummm Haiti you do need a passport….Perhaps US islands/territories no, but everything else, I don't think you are just rolling up in there.

  • Ky.

    I can understand needing to be level with the person you choose. However, I think the better solution is to improve yourself so that you are within the same league as the person you want. I don't like settling. If I cannot have the best of what I want, then I'm content with having nothing at all because the former supersedes the latter.

    I guess in some cases though even the biggest improvement isn't enough.

  • rachel

    love how they have going raw with a stranger as an extreme sport… true though… and on that note_27/30 and I'm female lol :P_

  • http://abachelorspad.com Mikal A.

    I’ve got them all covered except 7, 9, 11, 15 (kinda), 16, 19 and 20. I guess that makes me 23/30. I’m sure the rest will be checked off sometime in 2013 lol

  • RAy

    I have done everything up here except for tailor made suit. Never flown to be with a woman or flew one in. Orgy,well no but almost. Younger and wild days. I wouldn’t take anything back. I still do the Miami trip or out of the country trip with the fellas every year. Only because i’m single.

  • Steele

    Shit, I got like 27/28 of those!!

  • Steele

    Actually no, I have 29/30 – and only reason I haven't had a cigar is because I don't smoke! #epic

  • Segun A Akinboyo

    5thing Man must know jesus,must have principle, must be of help to atlest 3 people, must be achieve something, and must be thinking of the day he ‘ll sleep and not wake up anylonger