Do Men Really Want Their Women With Six-Pack Abs?

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There are a few things that most people (mainly women) can rely on me for – one is an unadulterated opinion. I remember a time my friend came up to me and said, “I’ve been working out. They say, I look like Kim Kardashian.” I looked her in the face and said, “Word! If you lost twenty pounds, you’d totally look like Kimmy.” Lately, I get asked a few questions a lot about my preference for the female anatomy. Many of these questions are always deeply rooted in women who are struggling with finding a balance between trying to have the body of Rosa Acosta and appreciating their body for what it is in its current state. Couple weeks ago, my home girl hits me on G-Chat and a conversation ensued:

My Homegirl: Hey Jay, how do u feel about a girl with six pack abs?

me: Like she’s been drinking a lot of beer?

MHG: no Jason. Lol. Smh. Like she does a lot of ab exercises and has a really defined midsection.

me: I don’t know. I get asked that a lot. Before we get too far, I don’t like girls who can’t drink beer though.

MHG: Well I don’t drink beer anyway…

me: But you could, like if everyone was drinking beer would you just not drink it. Actually never mind, forget that.

MHG: lol

me: No, I do not like when a girl has a six pack, it looks weird. I could never date a fitness model.

MHG: Interesting, what about a 4 pack?

me: I need to look at a picture of Rosa’s stomach. A 4-pack? OK but… it’s about how much definition is involved with that 4 pack or even the 6 pack like I don’t want her to be as chiseled as a man.

MHG: lol true

me: I don’t really focus on her stomach all that much though, but she should. But it really ain’t a big deal unless she’s got serious muffin top. Or like her belly button is on the back of the milk carton.

Aesthetically speaking, I’m a completely shallow person when it comes to looks. I’m man enough to admit that. I kid to my friends that I’m most likely a lesbian moonlighting in the body of a man because I am absolute obsessed with all things beautiful, mainly beautiful women. It’s important that you guys read a writer who will come out and admit to being an aesthetic whore. Most will not, most will lie and tell you what you want to hear which is that women of all shapes, sizes, colors, hair lengths, and all that other jazz that are characteristics that differ from woman to woman are beautiful. Sorry, it’s not true. It has never been true, the truth is, I believe in my right as a male to think that someone is not attractive to me.

With all that said, the best way to describe what I like in a woman, I’d put it like this, I’d like her to be as close to perfection as reality would have. What that means is that, as I said above, I really don’t want to date a woman whose stomach is more chiseled than mine. It’s just not natural to me. I think stomachs should be flat, but choosing between 6-pack abs and a little pudge, and I’ll take the pudge everyday. This post is about 6-pack abs but I’ll just go ahead and finish off this thought. When I was eighteen, I liked perky boobs that pointed straight or slightly up, now I’m a grown man, I like boobs that are full and hang the way natural boobs that women over the age of 23 have. I like a woman with a butt that doesn’t look like a bag of money or a 2 Chainz birthday present. I appreciate something much more natural, in my personal opinion, an awkwardly shaped ass is nothing that a pair of yoga pants can’t fix. All this to say, most female body image issues are a non-motherf*cking factor for me. She can worry about that, but I’m not going to waste my time. Be healthy, be happy, and be confident and in my eyes you’re beautiful.

I guess the point is, in pursuit of being as close to perfection as reality would have it does not include six pack abs. It may or may not include not letting “sweatpants, chilling with no makeup on” go too far in your life, but it doesn’t include 500 crunches a day and a medicine ball ab workout. I feel that if you have time to have 6-pack abs then there’s a long list of other things I’d like to see you focus on too. After all, your six pack abs may be able to wash my clothes but it for sure won’t make your mouth make an all-star team.

- Dr. J

Fellas, do you want your ladies with a six-pack abs? Ladies, you really sweating the six-packs abs? Like, how much does it matter? I guess the real question is, will you do it for yourself or because you think that’s what men want?

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  • MaggK

    i actually don't like it when the 6abs are super dupa defined (even on men). Trying to keep a flat stomach is already enough work…

  • Lola

    I prefer the outline of the abs on myself, no pack, just outline. Now that Im older I rather be healthy and secure about my body than worrying about having some type of pack. Some days my insecurity will win and I’ll be very self conscious and nit pick at my own body, but I love it at the moment. Yes, I could afford to lose a few, but at least I finally now accept my body and love it as is.

    I think some women are trying to emulate what men drool over TV and make it a priority to get a pack. Maybe they should start looking at bodies like Maliah and see that thickums is deliciously beautiful ;)

  • oh ok…

    Nay, Im not checking for anyone's 6pack…eh, Im just happy my pants fit! ;-) LOL! #realtalk

    • oh ok…

      I should have said…Happy my pants fit & I'm healthy, but whatever lol!

  • Jah Love

    No not at all. All we want is a slim flat belly, the six packs is for we the men and not the ladies. Same goes for biceps and triceps.

  • mara

    I like for my mid-section to look defined. I'm petite, always have been and I'm not a fan of pudge anywhere. As soon as I notice my belly getting pudgy I quickly get back to working out my abs. But I don't want to have a 6-pack. I think that looks very nice on a man and is actually my favorite body part on men.

  • Slim Jackson

    "I don’t really focus on her stomach all that much though, but she should. But it really ain’t a big deal unless she’s got serious muffin top. Or like her belly button is on the back of the milk carton."

    LOL. Great start to the day,
    My recent post Things You Should Know for an Interview

  • jaybefit

    As a fitness dude and instructor I may be biased. But although I wouldn't want my girl to have a more chiseled mid-section then me, I won't hate on women that do, and prefer a somewhat defined midsection. Generally because I can respect someone taking care of their body inside and out. Fit is the new skinny

    • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

      +1

  • Uncle Hugh, BP

    The woman in the picture above is winning all day.

    Most men don't mind a little softness or a little pouch. The outline is nice, as long as she doesn't look like Iris Kyle or anything.

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

    J, do you think we, the people, don’t know that’s Rosa Accosta in the picture?

    Anywho, I might be in the minority today but I wouldn’t say I LIKE a woman with 6-pack and but I def don’t DISlike it. To me, 6-pack abs do nothing more than show that a woman is in shape and priorities keeping in shape – two thangz I DO LIKE, no Chief Keef. My current primary IG crushes right now are Instagram.com/DollyCastro, Instagram.com/RosaAccosta, and Instagram.com/SuelynMedeiros. All these women have six packs ranging from 4 to 6s, and they’re sexy AF. However, honorable mentions to Instagram.com/KathyBentley_ and Instagram.com/DayamiPadron who have not a trace of a six-pack but they’re stomach is flat and they’re @ss is… *internet connection lost*

    All that said, this is still true for me as well…

    All this to say, most female body image issues are a non-motherf*cking factor for me. She can worry about that, but I’m not going to waste my time. Be healthy, be happy, and be confident and in my eyes you’re beautiful.

    A secure woman is (generally) sexy regardless of body type.

    - Sent from iPhone

    • Larry

      *Jots down IG names….opens IG* /

    • H.H.H.

      Wis passing out assists like CP3…i salute you good sir.

    • Uncle Hugh, BP

      WIM: "J, do you think we, the people, don't know that's Rosa Accosta in the picture?

      I didn't. #hangsheadinshame

      At least I was correct in that she "is winning all day."

    • Bree

      "A secure woman is (generally) sexy regardless of body type."
      If I could plus 10,000 this I would. Nuff said.

    • Paul B.

      Lob City, WIM style. Lol

    • Streetz

      Son u giving away all the chambers right now! lmao

    • KCsFAV

      Based on the women you've mentioned, I can't help to think the last paragraph in bold type should be concluded with: "…in my eyes you're beautiful…AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT BLACK." IJS

  • http://glippost.wordpress.com Darrk Gable

    A 6pack is a no go with me. It looks unnatural to me. On average, I like bigger, thicker women anyway (10-18, maybe 20 if it’s proportional), so a 6pack is pretty much the opposite of that. Though the specifics are of women with 6packs, its really, as J pointed out, a personal preference thing. If a dude likes it, cool, but he shouldn’t knock the next man who doesn’t, and vice versa.

  • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com Tristan

    I’ll take the flat stomach or even the pouch, Capri sun.

    • Dr. J

      Capri Suns are the most addictive 6.75 ounces on Earth.

  • L.A.

    i love it. i love an in shape woman like the picture above (Rosa Acosta). that would be perfect for me. Anything more defined would be too much. Love flat stomachs, because I have one as well.

  • Inot

    I'm definitely not sweating a six pack, but keeping that stomach flat is my main goal.

  • Peter Parker

    Yeah, a 6 pack on a female is not all that attractive, but I definitely wouldn't hate if she did have one. I prefer for my woman to have a nice, maybe a little pudge, mid-section. As long you eat right, stomach is not bigger than mines, and overall healthy, then I am good.

  • morganthewriter

    I prefer a flat stomach, but I don't mind a six-pack at all. It's much better than a muffin top, anyway.
    … Heck, I'm trying to get a six pack.
    My recent post Curvy Women vs. “Curvy” Women

  • Mr. SD

    Listen, shawty gonna get preggy at some point so I say just accept the pouch, the stretch marks and shout-out to that cellulite!

    • Lyric

      ummm I’m pregnant right now & you’re scaring me.

      • krystllyght

        Not everybody gets stretch marks and varicose veins during pregnancy (I did tho). Look around at your family, if it didn't happen to them it might not happen to you. Genetics plays a big role there and taking good care of yourself as well. Congrats on the pregnancy honey!

        • Lyric

          thank you!I’m pretty proud of myself

  • Uncle Hugh, BP

    I guess this would be the appropriate post to ask the question, since we are discussing six-packs, pouches, etc.

    *Which body type is preferable:

    A. Original, thick Vida Guerra
    B. Slimmer, foray into fitness modeling Vida Guerra

    It's rare that a video model makes a transformation from thick with a flat stomach to toned and tight, so Vida makes a good specimen to determine which look is better.

    *No, I will not provide links, I'm at work. Google is your friend.

    • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

      Damn. I’m sweating like I’m taking the SATs over this question.

      I’m going to go with A.

  • Bree

    So Doc J based on your comments it seems you like biracial or multi-racial women with very pretty faces and nice in shape bodies.

    • Dr. J

      what in the hell?

      "That was rhetorical meaning I already know the answer, or don't care what it is." – Mr. Woodcock.

    • Uncle Hugh, BP

      Who doesn't like biracial or multi-racial women with very pretty faces and nice in shape bodies?

      • Bree

        lol…I guess that answers my question Hughe

  • http://twitter.com/MrSpradley @MrSpradley

    I've always been a fan of women having a lil something I can hold onto. But that's just me.

    • krystllyght

      That's interesting Most. Whenever I heard guys say this I always thought they meant derriere or thighs.

  • Tunde

    i've dated women with 6 packs and women without 6 packs. as long as she's still curvy and on the softer side i'm cool. i don't want a woman whose 6 pack is more defined than mine tho. that's all i ask.
    My recent post The War on Christianity

  • Dr. Black Pepper

    Gotta chime in. I'll take a 6 pack over rolling the dice, EVERY single day. I gym. I gym often. I've seen plenty of 8's and 9's with and without 6 packs. With the 10's, I black out and lose control of some of my bodily functions, so I can't speak definitively on that. Beautiful women come in (almost) all shapes and sizes. Women with 6 packs certainly aren't excluded.
    Don't forget that there are different types of six packs too. Mine likes to take long breaks, and comes outside after hours without food, or while playing sports. Others stay on the grind 24/7, meanmuggin' fools. These are typically seen as less sexy.
    In any case, it's the total package that's really worth considering. For me, a 6 pack option is surely an upgrade from the standard manual.

  • jdoubleu

    I'll echo what some of the fellas up-thread said – I like my woman soft, but the ab outline is cool. I'm not going to complain about a soft 4 pack but if her stomach is tighter than mine, it's a no dice. While extremely fit bodies on woman are nice to look at, they don't always feel good to me; mainly since I'm a leaner guy. I've always been attracted to what I'd call fluffy. She's soft where she should be and everything else is proportionate.
    My recent post Reading my father’s eulogy with a different set of eyes

  • bellatrice1

    I hate the 6 pack on women, so I personally wouldn't want a 6 pack. I was having this convo with a guy once. It's basically a Ciara vs. Rihanna argument. I died when Ciara was compared to Kevin Durant, but to each his own!

  • Paul B.

    Not a big deal to me within reason. She can be fit and toned as long as she doesn’t cross over into that Ms. Olympia territory. Sorry, but somebody looking like Chyna or Nicole Bass from the old WWF days isn’t going to cut it with me.

  • https://www.facebook.com/AnthonyBrianLogan Anthony Brian Logan

    six pack abs are decent to look at on a woman but not to actually touch and be in intimate situations

  • http://twitter.com/inomallday Shamira

    Wait….y’all don’t mind a stomach?! Shiiiiiiettttt then why am I torturing myself with all these god d*mn planks?! *jumps off exercise mat*

    LOL.

    • krystllyght

      LMAO Girl! My hubs told me I can't go over 220 pounds. I was like wait. So I can get UP TO 220? I almost threw away my jumprope!

      • Kinectic

        LMAO! You all are funny.

  • https://www.facebook.com/AnthonyBrianLogan Anthony Brian Logan

    just because she dont have abs dont mean she got to look pregnant either though

    • Paul B.

      Right!!!

  • http://www.OpinionatedMale.com Mr SoBo

    A nicely toned mid section is perfectly fine for SoBo. I have never come across a woman with an uber defined abdominal region however. Not so sure how I would react to that, but I can't imagine it would be a turn off. If anything, I would be impressed. Then again, if it looked like professional body builder type abs, then thats a negative.
    The picture used for this article looks quite alright….and quite possibly fun.
    To each is own.
    My recent post Reality TV: The Molly of the Millennium…and Why We’re All Sweatin’ Away Our Values

  • Donai

    If you have to ask whether or not it's attractive, then you probably already know the answer. A man will let you know when he likes something. And what is a flat stomach without some nice curvy hips/ a 2 chainz birthday cake to go with it!?

    Insecurities, I have them all day, but body issues?…. lol

  • H•A•W

    to be honest… I want flat abs but not 6 packs. thats too much really.

  • FlyyLibrarian

    Sanya Richards Ross is attractive to nobody then?

    • Uncle Hugh, BP

      Her abs are cool and it's not that her body is unattractive, but being that lean isn't necessary. Her bodyfat percentage could go up ten percentage points, and the average guy wouldn't mind.

    • https://www.facebook.com/AnthonyBrianLogan Anthony Brian Logan

      She pretty but she doesnt have a womanly shape that I prefer physically

    • Dr. Black Pepper

      These guys are on sumfin. If her face were a 9 or 10, nobody here would think about 'preferring a more womanly figure'. She'd just be hot and fit. A new face would change the game.

      • https://www.facebook.com/AnthonyBrianLogan Anthony Brian Logan

        speak for yourself playboy

  • Streetz

    the thing is women get "having a stomach" and "having a gut" confused.

    I like a flat stomach. If you're soft, cool. If you have a firm 6 pack 4 pack whatever cool. If you have a soft stomach cool. If you have a GUT, naw. not my thing.

    And I keep my body tight to keep in line with my own womanly preferences.

    • Uncle Hugh, BP

      There is something wrong with the commenting system. I tried to like this more than once, and a message that stated, "Sorry You've already voted on that comment." popped up.

      Admins, please correct this oversight.

  • mchlthall

    As a man who works out regularly, and is lucky enough to have abs without much work, I appreciate a fit woman but prefer women to be a little softer.

  • The CPT

    I like fit women but a six pack abs is some new ish for women to be insecure about that I don't buy into. I just don't want a belly that tries to escape over the top of their beltline and no backfat rolls, but that's about it. Flat stomach…cool. Six packs…hell I don't even have em so why do I want her to?

  • BlueSteele

    Men are funny

  • Graciela

    I have a lifetime philosophy that I will work hard to maintain: Keep my body tight and my kitty cat even tighter. I personally like KNOWING that I'm taking care of myself..for ME. Of course it's a plus if my man appreciates it too.

  • Foreign black

    What straight guy throws away a great looking girl for having a 6 pack ??

    Since when did it become cool to demote athletic, healthy women and promote average/chubby women.

    SMH

    • sam

      guys like the idea of a thick women to cuddle and touch. its all visual, i'm saying there is a limit to "thick" higher than a size 12 gotta go to the gym , sorry thats how i feel.

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  • BawseofBawses

    I love that shit, I've been dating athletes for years. Shit is sexy to me.

  • http://SlimmQB7 SlimmQB7

    Yes lol, just means she has good health/genetics and/or great work ethic

  • michael

    I love a woman with a toned stomach. She hits the gym and keeps up with her health and her figure. A complete turn on.

  • Nikki

    How about it doesn't matter? What happened to commitment not based on looks? This is why I find guys revolting sometimes. Please get some reality checks and look past the superficial!!!

    Most guys are probably against six packs on women because they're not chiselled enough or dedicated enough to get some of their own! I could definitely overpower a lot of guys.

  • http://twitter.com/LadyA08 @LadyA08

    You have to be attracted to the person you are with, so yes…looks matter (however, what works for one, might be a disaster for another…so we've all got a chance).

    I've not yet had one guy mad at my 6 pack. I love having an active fit life – it's not excessive, but a run schedule is just as important as an eating schedule. #BGR!

    Matter of fact if a guy preferred an unhealthy woman – we would be a horrible match. Not about that unfit life. It's gross to me.

  • Circa

    Its always the same comments with these self-image articles. Everyone always bashes the idealism of being fit. Whether its being skinny, 6-pack, definition, etc. Its always the same " those girls need to eat something" or "I prefer a little fat, like REAL women"

    Don't look down on something you can't achieve yourself.

  • sam

    when you work out to that magnitude that you have abs. you get too skinny and it is unflattering. sorry but i like my size 12 hips

  • leslie

    I think from a psychological perspective. I think its the women that want to compete with men whether it stems from conflict with men that they had in their life, father, caretaker etc.

  • Howard

    sigh you don't do a lot of abs work out to get defined abs. You do a lot of cardio exercises/eat lots of protein to keep your appetite in check to lose the fat for the muscle definitions to show.

    I do like women with six pack abs because every bit of fat not on the boobs is disgusting.

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