Should You Ever Delete Facebook for Your Relationship?

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Facebook-is-a-drug

Yes.

Last week, a number of people were debating if they would ever delete Twitter for their significant other. Some people, including yours truly, didn’t think it was that big of an issue. Others vowed passionately that they would never delete their Twitter for anyone, for any reason. Their main point of contention was that anyone that would ask you to delete your Twitter/Facebook or any other social media site of choice is insecure, not worthy of companionship, and therefore, their request should not be entertained. Apparently, there is no justifiable reason for an adult to ask another adult to delete his or her Twitter/Facebook. I find this line of thinking interesting for a variety of reasons, but I’ll only cover three today.

Only an insecure person would make you give up Twitter/Facebook

Given this line of reasoning, it’s equally possible that only an insecure person would need to stay on Twitter/Facebook. Interestingly enough, this was the most common argument and I will admit that it is a very real possibility that an insecure person would make you delete a social media website you enjoy. What is interesting is the fact that people are quick to point out their significant other’s insecurity as the only justifiable reason behind someone asking them to leave a social media website without applying the same level of justification to themselves for needing to be on the website in the first place. After all, just because someone prioritizes something – in this case your relationship – over the use of a social media website does not inherently makes him or her insecure. You may be amazed to find out that not everyone is on *insert your favorite social media website here* and not everyone thinks your *insert your favorite social media website here* is particularly important to daily life or existence.  Before generalizing someone as insecure, I think it’s important to have a conversation about why they want you delete your profile before universally declaring you’ll “never” delete it and any reason they come up with, no matter how sound, is merely thinly veiled insecurity.

I need Twitter/Facebook.

I doubt it.

Believe it or not, we said the same thing about AOL IM and MySpace a few short years ago. When is the last time you logged into one of those websites? We have short-term memories, coupled with selective amnesia and a habit of dramatizing the present. I wish this went without saying but social media websites are not like food, air, and water. You might have an addiction to them but you don’t need them. You lived without them before they arrived, and you won’t die whenever they depart. This is evidenced by the literally billions of people around the world who function without ever logging into a single social media website in their entire lives.

Anyone who follows me on Twitter knows I’m as big a Twitter addict as anyone, but I can safely say that I don’t need Twitter. In fact, I’ve taken several purposeful sabbaticals from Twitter, because like most things, not taken in proper moderation you will overdose on Tweets. It’s not that I don’t like Twitter. I like it a lot, but my life is not significantly better or worse with or without the service. I’m not the type to make an overarching generalization like “if you have time to Tweet you’re not having fun,” but the fact of the matter is if you’re busy having as much fun as you claim you’re having and want us to believe, then you usually aren’t Tweeting #atthesamedamntime. If it was really that awesome, just post the photographic evidence to Instagram later so we can all secretly hate you behind the comfort of our computer screens at our own convenience. Besides, a picture is worth a thousand words and Tweets only hold 140 characters. This is only practical.

The point is the majority of people on Facebook and Twitter – and most any other social media website not dedicated to a professional service, such as LinkedIn – are using the website for, as the name implies, social services. There are very few “power users” on Facebook and Twitter – people whose only justification for maintaining an active account is to share their professional message. While many casually use Twitter to promote their professional message or network, even these people primarily use these websites for entertainment. There’s nothing wrong with that but I’m not sure it’s worth losing your (I’m assuming otherwise good) relationship over.

Is a social media website more important than your relationship?

The reason I placed Facebook in the header is because in my opinion it makes more sense for someone to debate deleting Facebook over Twitter (and most other social media websites). On Facebook – a website that I’m not on – it is my understanding there is at least some semblance of a relationship between yourself and most of the people you follow and/or who follow you. In other words, your network primarily consists of friends, family, colleagues and so forth. Broadly speaking, these are people you “know” in real life – how well you know them is not important today.

Conversely, Twitter – and most other social media websites – consists of strangers following other strangers. For example, as of the date of this posting, I had 3,014 followers on Twitter. I follow approximately 484 people. I “know” maybe 10 of these people in real life. I’ve met maybe 5 (I’m assuming the other half aren’t pulling a Catfish, but who really knows or cares at this point). Like most others on Twitter, my network predominately consists of strangers. This isn’t unique by any means. As far as social media websites go, Facebook is actually the outlier. Ironically, most “social” media websites consists of strangers networking on-line around common subjects of interest. For most websites, there is not an obligation, or even an expectation, that you will ever meet or know these people in real life. Therefore, when people say they would “never” give up Twitter or *insert random website of choice here* this loosely translates to, “I prioritize entertaining and following strangers I don’t know over the woman/man in my life that I do know.”

1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*? What was your/their reasoning? 2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend? 3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?

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From Our Partners

  • http://twitter.com/el_botin_negro @el_botin_negro

    Well I wouldn't say I wouldn't ever delete my account, but I just wouldn't do it because someone asked me to….I am who I am & they fell in love with who I am, which includes social networks. Will I stop using it one day? Yeah! Do I place it as more important than a relationship? No! I just simply see it as something that doesn't help or hurt a relationship unless you're up to no good anyway, so I just don't see a reason that I would or should be asked to get rid of anything.

  • WAChick

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*?

    No.

    What was your/their reasoning? N/A

    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend?

    No. I just don't think it's that big a deal.

    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?

    I might, depending on the reason.

    I will say that I have definitely deleted my fb after a breakup. I didn't feel like deleting him, so I just de-activated my account temporarily while I was getting over the breakup. When I felt like I was 'over it,' I re-activated it. I de-activated it because I didn't want to be tempted to snoop around his page (aka fb stalk him).

  • Selah

    I was actually pondering this today, as the person who I'm dating decided they wanted to start using social media again after having deleted everything almost a year ago. We began dating while they were NOT using social media, so I feel like that made it easier; no questioning him liking a photo, RT'ing some chick, or any of the little things that accompany dating someone while dealing with social media. Now that he's using a site, I feel kind of weird about it. I don't want him to delete it but I am weary of instances that could spark insecure thoughts…

  • http://inanimatethoughts.blogspot.com Animate

    I think if you do it, it should be voluntary. I've shut down my social for a brief period after a few conversations that were followed by headaches. I just said screw it. She didn't know until she went to show me something and couldn't find my profile. Pretty much told her what the deal was.
    My recent post My 2012 gaming year in review

  • http://www.OpinionatedMale.com Mr SoBo

    I have a better question: Have people allowed social media to become that seriously important in their own everyday lives, that tit poses a threat to their real live relationships? Especially to the point where they feel it necessary to impose their 'insecurities' upon their significant other in the manner of requesting the termination of social media accounts. Yes I said insecurities, because more times than not, thats what it boils down to, even if it is justified.

    Sure there is a myriad of other reasons why one would make such a request, but given our understanding and observation of human behavior (particularly in the form of relationships, not to mention what we have witnessed ourselves via twitter/FB drama), we have to be honest with ourselves as to the primary reason one would make such a request.

    In any event, to the question at hand: An unwillingness to give up a social media account does not necessarily translate to placing a higher importance on the online thrills over the relationship. Although definitely a possibility, it is too quite presumptuous. Consider this: A reluctance to give up said activity could be a result of pride or even a matter of power dynamics in the relationship. Taking a stand so to say.

    Ok. I'm tired. And rambling. And half of what I wrote probably doesn't even make sense. But I said all this to say, none of us needs twitter or facebook. We have existed and communicated and built solid relationships since the beginning of mankind without it. It is non essential, and no matter how popular it and convenient it is today, it is still non essential despite how hard mainstream media attempts to convince us otherwise. So unless you are trying to prove to your s/o that he/she can't control you, delete the d@mn thing. Good night SBM

    Mr. SoBo.
    OpinionatedMale.com

    My recent post Changing The Game: Rewriting A More Exciting Season

    • Slim Jackson

      You made sense. No worries there.

      I don't think someone should have to give up social media because their SO asked them to. I think they should give it up (or dramatically reduce usage) if it's to the point of addiction and actually harming the relationship the way any other addiction would. i.e. He or she is coming home late because they're fiended out in a tweet house or scoring likes on Facebook in an alley. That's where it becomes a problem.

      (Also somewhat related, more things are about insecurity than we'd like to admit — even if the term is overused.)
      My recent post slimjackson: @MTVNews you guys came up with 10 commercials? i think that's generous.

  • Smilez_920

    In most cases when a s/o is asking their bf/gf to delete a social media site , it’s because their insecure about something that’s going on. Now the bf/ gf could be acting ” out of pocket” on theses sites which could lead to the issue but , social networks shouldnt cause that much drama in a relationship. If social networks are killing your relationship , you need to get rid of them or the person your with .

    Sidenote: half of the issues that are ” caused by social media” happen because ppl put all of their buisness on there. I remember back In The day when ppl actually liked keeping their buisness to themselves and valued privacy. I think people forget social networks are public sites , act accordingly .

    • X's Dad

      "Now the bf/ gf could be acting " out of pocket" on theses sites which could lead to the issue but , social networks shouldnt cause that much drama in a relationship."

      That's just it, some of these 'social sites' are doing just that….causing drama in a relationship. The thing is, the sites like any other thing should be utilized with moderation. But that's the problem. People don't use these sites in moderation. I would not ask her to delete her account, but I would let her know how her addiction to it is cauing strain on our relationship. If she chooses not to delete it or slow down, then I would just leave the relationship altoghether. In the end, it's not worth it. Too many relationships and marriages end due to this 'social website' garbage. I deleted my Facebook account in 2009 and haven't looked back and doing fine……

      • SMilez

        I'm not quite referring to addiction. (Like your gf/bf can't breath or go 5 minutes without logging on). I'm talking about how you present yourself on line. The person is the issue not social networking. All social networking does is give people the choice, it's up to the person to act accordingly.

        If Facebook, Twitter or any other social site “ended your marriage” you guys probably had unresolved issue in the first place and just let them grow on line. If someone is going to cheat, they’ll do it, if someone is going to run their mouth about their relationship issue to anyone who will listen they’ll do it, if someone has no act right , they have no act right, Facebook didn’t make them that way. Now if you truly need to get rid of S/N to get your relationship right do it, but make sure there’s a license counselor in the room to help you and your s/o solve your problems, because that’s what’s needed.

        • AfterMath

          I'd add that if there's something wrong and your partner's going on FB/Twitter telling everybody about your relationship details, then deleting the account won't stop this. They can still come places like here or one of the millions of message boards (you know, social networking before AIM) and air your dirty laundry.
          My recent post Arithmetic Sequences

  • MaggK

    I mean i've deleted my twitter account because of my job… I would delete FB for the sake of my relationship, but i would need solid reasons. FB is super useful to me (when you have family and friends abroad i swear it's super convenient!) You can't just come and say "delete your fb" no no no, It doesn't work that way!!!

  • bumight

    Its not about "needing" social media. If your significant other is asking you to give up facebook/twitter, there are clearly other issues (not only insecurity) that need to be addressed.

    Once you go down that route, how long will it be before he starts asking you to give up friends, family, your job etc for him. The worst is IF that relationship doesnt work out, then where does that leave you?
    Obviously social media can affect relationships, especially because they present an easy avenue for flirting, and other things that can affect real life relationships.

    I however nelieve that both of you should talk about things and have gaurdrails as to how social media will work> maybe a no flirting, no posting personal stuff, or even no DMs etc rule. Thats the best I can do.

    • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com Tristan.

      if you dont get to the issue then deleting social media is merely a band aid on a gunshot wound. Deleting facebook/twitter doesnt curb flirting, theres ppl in real life, just cuz she cant post subliminals doesnt mean shes going to talk directly to u

  • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com Tristan.

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*? What was your/their reasoning?
    Deleting is an extreme but I have asked girls to take it down a few notches. I'm a fairly private person, i like to keep our business, our business, good or bad the relationship will not be televised. I had some counter with that ol u ashamed line but then I gotta ask she in a relationship for me or them.

    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend?
    Again deleting is a bit much when you can just stop using….hell it took forever to get them followers. I truly would consider it if her reasons were justified

    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?
    It sounds weird but i would for a girlfriend before a wife, why? Because i think if we're committed for life you shouldnt be concerned with my hobbies. I'd like to think you'd be well aware of my twitter/video game/writing obsession before u said I do.

    My recent post Today’s Word is… SUPER

    • oh ok…

      REAL.TALK.

  • LBoogie

    No social media site runs the content on your profile itself. The issue is with how the S/O is acting on said Social media site not the social media site itself. That's just the medium. If your S/O is acting an azz and being disrespectful to a relationship on social media chances are they are/have been doing it outside of social media. That's where the issue lies…in some cases it's insecurities, but in most cases it's the user not respecting the relationship and it's now visible to the S/O and everyobdy else that 's following. Liking a picture or commenting someone looks nice is no big deal, but when disrespectful comments, following, stalking etc. start that's when there seems to be an issue…

  • Tunde

    i've never asked anyone to give up a social media account nor have i been asked to give one up. i don't think a s/o asking me to give one up necessarily equates them to being insecure. if it hindered my actual relationship i would give up social media in a heartbeat. real life > online life.
    My recent post The War on Christianity

  • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

    Interesting comments so far. I must have a far more passive relationship with social media sites than most. If my wife asked me to delete Twitter or any other site, I’d ask her why just to know the reasoning and then I’d probably just do it – or as I said in the post, reduce my usage down to professional opportunities (writing, networking, etc). I guess it’s just not that serious to me, but I do mainly only use these sites for entertainment so maybe that’s why. Also, most of us do all kinds of things we don’t want to do for the benefit of our relationship and/or keeping someone we like/love happy. I don’t see why deleting Facebook is where people are drawing the line.

    • Smilez_920

      True. I mean wife and girlfriend are on two different levels. I don’t too many people have an issue with getting rid of social media or cutting usage. But it’s the reasoning that has people throwing around the word “insecure”. I mean what non-insecure reason is there for your s/o too just come out of the blue and go “delete your social networks”. And if you have to delete yours, are they deleting theirs as well.

      Honestly I just use my twitter and instagram for entertainment. I don’t even take that many pics, (I just got it a month ago). As far as twitter goes, I keep my personal business private and I tend carry myself respectfully on Twitter, so I cant think of a reason other than “ your s/o thinks your flirting with other ppl online” or “your not representing yourself in a respectful manner” online that would make them request that from you. I have facebook just because my whole family has it now, so it shouldn’t be an issue.

  • http://glippost.wordpress.com Darrk Gable

    I’ve never been asked to delete any social media account. It’s never been that important to my wife. I really use it as a way to stay up on blogs that I enjoy reading, political issues, and sports. Some of the connections I’ve made, especially on Twitter have opened up a few doors that I may not otherwise have come across.

    What I have been asked is to be mindful of what I post. I keep personal feelings off line, and try to not do anything I wouldn’t want my wife doing. I can’t front though, if she asked me to delete Twitter, we’d have to talk about. Not because I’m addicted to it, but as described above, it has opened a few doors to me professionally.

  • larnelw

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*? What was your/their reasoning?

    - Never have and don't believe I ever would

    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend?

    - No….period

    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?

    - ONLY if for a justifiable reason (at the moment I cannot think of one). But if requested we will first have to get down to why it was requested. I am not deleting it due to insecurity or jealousy. Because if I do I will have to give up further things in live for those same reasons.

    I think asking someone to delete their social networking accounts is almost always a situation of insecurity. Now I see where you say "…it’s equally possible that only an insecure person would need to stay on Twitter/Facebook." but if I am already own it then what need do I have to leave now? If a woman can't trust me WITH a social network account then the likklihood is she can't trust me at all.

  • Paul B.

    A lot of it has to do with how you carry yourself on social media. If you’re in a relationship but you’re acting single on social media then that is a problem. Is it Facebook’s fault or Twitter’s fault? nope. If somebody on your friends list says something out of pocket in regards to you and your relationship and you fail to handle it appropriately, is that social media’s fault? No. If somebody approaches you and you entertain it and you’re in a relationship, is that social media’s fault? No, that’s your fault. There’s a thing called personal accountability, which seems to be dying out these days.

    • krystllyght

      That's all fine and dandy but eliminating social media pages isn't going to stop anybody from any of those things you mentioned. That can all be done offline too. I'm just saying.

      • http://twitter.com/el_botin_negro @el_botin_negro

        That's what Paul was getting at, it isn't the S/N to blame but the person using it….so having them delete their account doesn't solve the problem since they're likely doing the same things in real life.

        • Paul B.

          Somebody gets what I’m saying. Lol

  • Uncle Hugh, BP

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook…? What was your/their reasoning?

    No. N/A.

    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend?

    No.

    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?

    Probably not.

    I guess I'm not going crazy with Facebook, and I'm not on the Twitter. I'm not stalking exes, I have no shirtless pictures in the mirror posted showing off the pecs and abs, I haven't "liked" the "Big T!++ies & A$$es" fan page, and I'm not on Facebook ten hours a day.

    If my wife asked me to get rid of my Facebook page, I'd entertain her reasons. But I can't think of a reason why it would bother her.

  • amaris79

    I have never asked, and I have never been asked, to delete any profile on a social media platform. HOWEVER, I have asked a s/o to delete a PERSON, and have also been on the receiving end of the illustrious #BlockedDeletedReportedAsSpam for the purpose of er…moving a relationship forward. In all of those cases, however was a key condition-a breach of trust, or the perception of so. In that case, I believe you as the "offending party" need to do whatever your s/o asks of you to restore the trust, if it was breached. I also agree if it is interfering with communication or intimacy there should also be a "social media break". But I'd have a hard time deleting completely, as more than half of my "actual" friends do not live in my time zone, and it's nice as an introvert to be able to keep up with more than one person at a time, as each social interaction drains my battery. My friends know they can go months without a call from me, but I can interact in some way with them daily online. I'd hate to lose that.

  • krystllyght

    Not only no but hell no and eff you would be my answer to such a bs request. I'm a pretty accomodating wife and I try to be drama free and laid back but this request would just make me mad and I don't even be on there like that and I don't even think it's very important in my life! In the past, I would've given in and cried my eyes out. But not tuhday. Listen, I know it's sad but for some people social media provides the bulk of their social life or is the sole source of it. To request that they eliminate it is pretty darn selfish and just because you're anti-social doesn't mean your partner has to be too. However, I do encourage you to express your distaste and disinterest in it just so it's on the table and with that information let me do with it what I will and that may very well be just deleting the darn thing anyway but don't, don't ask me to delete it. I'd just keep it out of spite.

  • Naija

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*? What was your/their reasoning?

    No and no. I'd be more likely to ask someone to tone things down, but the odds are that I would be dating someone who would know to do it without being asked.

    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend?

    No. I can't think of any legitimate reason outside of flirtatious behaviour that would warrant such a request, and that's something that can be handled with a conversation addressing the root cause. Besides, I would hardly be engaged in such behaviour when in a relationship.

    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?

    We would really need to sit down and address the issue(s) behind the request. At the end of the day, my marriage is more important than social media, so it's a request I might accommodate if there were some semi-reasonable thought behind it. If, however, it's simply because I happen to interact with people he does not like or of whom he is suspicious (without me giving him further reasons to be concerned), then perhaps not. A marriage isn't about giving into all your partner's requests simply so that there'll be no headaches. At the end of the day, I may well end up deleting whatever it is of my own volition, but I seriously can't imagine someone actually asking me to do so.

  • cynicaloptmst81

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*? What was your/their reasoning? – No, N/A
    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend? – I really can't think of a reason why I'd need to…
    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked? – Again, I really can't think of a reason why I'd need to…

    If I can't trust you on FB/twitter…or vice versa, we shouldn't be dating/relating/married in the first place. If I'm with you, its because I trust you to act like you have some sense…especially when I'm not looking…and I expect the same level of trust from my boo/man/husband.

    • Naija

      This.

  • Mr. SD

    Social Media aint going nowhere, if anything its only going grow and spawn off newer more cooler variations of what already exist. So we all just need to adjust to the culture. #orgetleftbehind

  • Kevin Ferere

    I think the person asking the other to delete the account is the one insecure. >>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KMb91p_Slo

  • Kevin Ferere

    If anything, the sensible thing for the insecure partner to simply mention that their partner spending time on social networks or communicating with a particular individual makes them uncomfortable. Demanding would make you look controlling and we all know you shouldn't/can't be in a relationship to control someone. Simply express how you feel leave it alone, and if you continue to see it as problem unrectified, make the necessary steps.

  • https://www.facebook.com/AnthonyBrianLogan Anthony Brian Logan

    If social media get in the way of your situation then that means there are underlying issues to the whole situation that yall need to sit down, address & solve rather than breaking up and using facebook as the scapegoat.

  • http://www.opinionatedmale.com cortonio

    first off, you shouldn't be so hooked on FB or twitter to the point where it can be detrimental to your relationship. There are people I know that spend more time on FB than lots of things. Facebook should be what it is, either a networking machine, or just simply catching up with some old friends. I don't see the need to have 500+ friends on FB to begin with. Everything should be used in moderation, and maybe if there is trouble in your relationship, encourage your significant to get an account and "friend" each other. If you're on FB for the sake of hooking up with females, you don't need to be in a relationship anyway. period.
    My recent post Changing The Game: The Sports Scenarios We’ll Never Know

  • BlueSteele

    1) Would you ask or have you ever been asked by someone to delete your/their Facebook/Twitter/*insert social media website of choice here*? What was your/their reasoning?

    No, no, n/a

    2) Would you ever delete your Facebook/Twitter for your girlfriend/boyfriend?

    No

    3) Would you delete your Facebook/Twitter if your husband/wife asked?

    No

    I've never deleted or edited my social media sites for a job, church, or family. I do not post #thirsttrap photos of myself or entertain flirting or other inappropriate behavior so my s/o shouldn't be bothered by FB/twitter. I honestly never even post my relationship status on FB; I'm a member of camp "if people know we're together, they know. If not, whatever." Asking me to give up social media or anything else for the relationship is a power trip and would likely just turn me off.

  • dolograteful

    I push my man to join facebook but he won’t. I want to know asap if he would cheat or leave me for someone else. I wouldn’t delete my facebook because I have college friends on there from all over the world.

  • dolograteful

    Temptations exist everywhere. No point in trying to get around them by avoiding facebook. Get it out of the way. Just try to find someone with the right type of mentality and live in the moment.

  • somehume

    1. I don't think that I'd ask my significant other to delete a social network unless I believed that something about it was causing problems that could only be remedied by doing so.

    2. I'd have a conversation with my girlfriend, if I had one, prior to deciding whether or not to delete my account.

    3. Similarly, if I were married, I'd discuss the matter in detail prior to making a decision. I think that I'd be more likely to toss the account for my wife.

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  • LIFE

    1.YES I have asked my significant other to delete face book and instagram. My reasoning was he was spending too much time chatting with random girls on his Facebook list. He likes it when girls pay too much attention to him. I have found inappropriate messages and phone #exchanges. It was a long distance relationship.
    2.Would I delete FB for significant other ,I definitely will if I see it jeopardizing my relationship. I don't want to ruin my real world for a social media world.
    3. I would delete it

    I just want to say something about insecurity, some of you might think oh she is insecure, that is far from the truth. Most people nowadays use the social media to gain confidence by posting reveling pictures and letting others comment to feel good about them selves. How many followers they have and how many likes, it is like most people would do anything to get a positive feed back. I am not with my boyfriend now because he wouldn't delete his facebook and I agreed, but I told him if I found out he is talking to random girls and exchanging #s I would break it off and it happened and I did.

    • https://www.facebook.com/kevinferere Kevin Ferere

      You boyfriend left you cuz you pushed him away, cuz you were being insecure. The checking, and the survailence isn't gonna stop anything, but only make it worse. If you're looking for something, you'll find it. There's a fine line between jealousy and insecurity. Jealous is a natural human trait, and it's ok. But insecurity is jealous misunderstood and uncontrolled. Your boyfriends FB is HIS not yours. Check yourself before you check him.

  • Toya

    I was asked to delete my Facebook and my instagram…only for him to keep his Facebook and many other social media spots I believe is unfair. I mean hell thats obviously a red flag of non-trust. Not once since we argued about it have I ask him to delete his. But I already know what the problem is. Men think (mines) that they can do whatever and its not gonna be a problem. The thing is I don’t make it one cause its not that important. On the other hand I believe that he thinks I do what he does and he gets scared and makes me do what he should be doing. Get it? Its a really bad way of thinking, after all if he has gotten used to his behavior and can’t stand to be corrected he’s gonna have to learn that that’s not the way the world works. Idgaf what he does as long as he respects me. 50/50 not 60/40

  • Mesa Crates

    Here is a better question:

    Why in a serious relationship would anyone need to even have facebook?

    Considering the reality is facebook is no different than any other dating platform. With the exception that you can filter who can see what on facebook making it even easier than all the existing dating platforms to be devious.

  • Mesa Crates

    Here is a better question:

    Why in a serious relationship would anyone need to even have facebook?

    Considering the reality is facebook is no different than any other dating platform. With the exception that you can filter who can see what on facebook making it even easier to be devious.

  • Mesa Crates

    Here is a better question:

    Why in a serious relationship would anyone need to even have facebook?

    Considering the reality is facebook is no different than any other dating platform. With the exception that you can filter who can see what on facebook making it even easier to be devious.

  • Mesa Crates

    Here is a better question:

    Why in a serious relationship would anyone need to even have facebook?

    Considering the reality is facebook is no different than any other dating platform. With the exception that you can filter who can see what on facebook making it even easier to be devious.

  • Mesa Crates

    Facebook is no different than any existing dating platform with the exception to filter who can see what content making it easier to be deviant.

    Facebook is not needed in a serious relationship.