5 Things All Men Should Lose By Age 30

It's time to grow up.

It’s time to grow up.

Last week, MensHealth.com dropped a list of 13 items all 30-year-old “men,” term used loosely, should get rid of by age 30. I thought I’d share my favorite top five from the list, in no particular order, and see what others think a man should retire as he enters his 30th year of life.

Not the facial hair of someone with a full time job.

This is not the facial hair of someone with a salary job.

1. CREATIVE FACIAL HAIR

Admittedly, this one kind of hurt my heart, because even at age 30 I still like to make creative facial hair designs every now and then. To make matters worse, they specifically called out the “handle bar!” Granted, I haven’t had a handle bar since turning 30, I didn’t know the style was forbidden! Just because I’m 30, I have to be plain faced? Say it aint so! I’ve already been forced to make peace with the loss of hair on my head and now it seems I have to manage the hair I have left on my face to a minimum.

Cole World.

2. RAMEN NOODLES

Unless you’re budget challenged, this should be a given. However, this requirement should be extended to include any meal that originates predominately from a package or microwaveable container. So that means say good-bye to those Hungry Man dinners and ravioli microwave containers. If the sodium content in these “meals” doesn’t kill you, the embarrassment of owning them should. No 30-year old man should be able to “cook” any dinner in under 3-minutes. So if tonight’s dinner content hasn’t changed much since college, step away from the microwave and get your life together.

3. AVOIDING THE DOCTOR

When’s the last time you had a physical? If you don’t know the answer to this question, correct it. Then, at least once every 12 months from that time, repeat! You aren’t 21 anymore. Man up and Get. It. Together.

4. PLASTIC VIDEO GAME INSTRUMENTS

The last gaming system I owned was a Sega Genesis, so this is a pretty easy requirement for me. Honestly, I don’t see anything wrong with a “grown man” playing video games as long as he properly prioritizes the importance of the games. If you play video games or involve yourself in fantasy leagues as a part-time hobby that minimally interferes with your day-to-day life, no problem. However, if you’re the type of guy that is willing to miss the birth of his first born or pass up sexual relations with your’re significant other so you can get on-line to play video games while talking into a microphone with another full-grown man who is making the same questionable life choices, or even more eerie, small-grown child, then you might want to take some time to re-evaluate your life as you head deeper into your 30s, before it’s too late.

Family_man5. SENTIMENTAL PR0N

Hey, I get it. You never thought you’d ever have enough game to get with the Senior AKA when you were a freshmen in college, yet somehow, not only did you manage to bag her, she – demonstrating her own questionable life choices – allowed you to tape the affair! Cool story, bro.

BUT THAT WAS 10 YEARS AGO!

It’s finally time to delete all those pics and videos of your ex-girlfriend, favorite WSHH video vixen, and/or favorite adult film star and transition into becoming a family man. In college, adorning your dorm room with photos of your favorite video girl of the month was expected and downright cool. In your 30′s, decorating your home or cubicle with women a decade your junior is disturbing, and reeks of the type of desperation you read about on the headlines of news papers from guys who end up in jail for hiding cameras in women’s bathrooms. It’s a slippery slope, sir. Don’t slip down that slope. Dispose of that sentimental filth, ASAP.

WIM SigCheck out MensHealth full list of 13 items all men should get rid of by age 30 by clicking hereIn your opinion, what are some other things 30 year old men should get rid of or start adding by the time they reach their third decade on Earth?

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  • jrsirmans

    This is the bad side of society that tells you what is expected of you as an individual. That's cool but the main reason I'll remain anti-establishment and broke until my business does better. I'm not following these recommendations but cool story, bro.

    • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

      Ok.

    • amaris79

      I mean I get anti-establishment but "I'm not getting a physical or halting my ramen noodle consumption just because society tells me to" is just….

      Ok.

  • https://www.facebook.com/AnthonyBrianLogan Anthony Brian Logan

    this list was funny LOL

  • @ms_sarafina

    That first picture looks like you, WIM.

    Definitely agree with the list, I wonder if there's an equivalent for women? lol

    • Naija

      I initially wasn't paying much attention, so my brain processed it as his pic. lol.

    • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

      #TheSlander

    • Uncle Hugh, BP

      All skinny light-skinned guys look alike!

  • Uncle Hugh, BP

    Strong cosign on the futons from the MH list. I've slept on enough bad mattresses in my younger days, and I'm never going back!

    • AfterMath

      I was asking a friend if a hammock was in the same category as a futon. I know they're different things, but I've always wanted a hammock. I thought about getting one but somebody was saying that that's for college kids. Maybe its just me and my set of friends but I've never seen a college kid with a hammock except in a movie.
      My recent post The PageRank Algorithm

      • Uncle Hugh, BP

        I've been wanting a hammock to put in my backyard for years. I just might act on that this summer.

  • Jupiter Calhoun

    I lost the willingness to let other people decide how I should live my life.

  • Peter Parker

    Good post, esp. #3. As a public health/healthcare administration professional, brothers we gotta start getting those physicals. It's best to know what shape your body is in before it's too late.

  • mahdame_self

    …ummm wait, I'm confused at #5 though, WIM?!?! I'm pretty sure I've seen you RT some questionable photos and articles on Twitter. Not tryin to call anyone out, but does this rule only apply to HS/college "crushes"?? I was just havin a convo with my girls about this topic…the 30+ aged men with the superficial follows on IG and Twitter *sighhh*

    And #3….PREACH. I share the sentiments of the brother above's comment. As a public health professional, it hurts my heart that men do not take ownership of their health. Going to the gym, weightlifting, etc. we (the ladies) appreciate that, unfortunately, that doesn't get you medically cleared from any/every illness!

    • http://www.singleblackmale.org/author/wisdomismisery/ WisdomIsMisery

      Thanks for asking rather than accusing. My response is two fold: 1) I wrote about this topic here – http://www.singleblackmale.org/2013/01/14/is-it-ok-for-committed-men-to-like-other-women/ 2) I formerly #SuperficialFollow’d on Twitter and even had a “list” for others to follow before Instagram came out, which removed the need to follow and decipher between Tweets when we were only interested in the pics anyway.

      IMO, #3 is referring to keeping sentimental evidence from past relationships or having a significantly unhealthy obsession with women (you’ll never get with). I personally treat IG like a men’s magazine, whereby I casually observe (and share) pics with other men. I think appreciating the beauty of random women is simply something men do – whether women like it or not is debatable but arguably irrelevant. It would be like men tryin to understand or regulate women’s (usual) preferences for shoes and shopping.

      • mahdame_self

        ahaa gotcha. Definitely missed your previous post on the topic, good stuff though. I actually agree with it…in fact, in our convo I said I'd rather a 30+ guy in a relationship have superficial follows than a 30+ single man bc I'd be worried the single one was fantasizing a bit too much with no grasp of reality, hence holding himself back from settling down with just one woman. Whereas the guy in the relationship will likely have wandering eyes regardless, better he does it in his girls face…

  • larnelw

    I like that you altered certain parts of the MH article. Particularly the video games part. I agree that there needs to be some healthy balance there but according to MH we shouldn't play at all. They going a bit to far with that. Also disagree with them on this "10. Shots With More Than One Liquor
    ". Eff what they talking about but I'm not giving up my Long Island Ice Teas. Not giving up my Incredible Hulks or my Electric Lemonades. Not giving up any of a number of mixed drinks inply because they think I should only drink Scotch on the rocks or vodka and organe juice.

    • amaris79

      Well, technically they aren't SAYING saying "give it up"…just acknowledge that as time passes and you get older your ability to RECOVER from them (period, and/or in time to properly satisfy your wife) diminishes. If you're ok with that, then cool, drink away. :-)

  • amaris79

    I'm not gonna really go into any depth on how I feel on the topic. I am, however, giving GIANT side-eyes to all these here "anti-establishment" men who SWEAR people have no right to tell them how to "behave" as a man…but are all to eager to say how "proper women" should act in order to "earn" their "respect. EYE see you. Carry on.

    • cynicaloptmst81

      *giggles*

      *waits*

      • Naija

        Aye.. I been missing some drama on SBM??

        • cynicaloptmst81

          *waves*

          Not at all…and clearly, the men didn't take the bait on this issue either, lol.

  • Dee

    Have to make a distinction between those raman noodles you buy for ten cents a pop and ‘authentic’ ones….

  • h.h.h.

    Great post..

    i'm still eatin' ramen tho…lol

    • cynicaloptmst81

      No judgment…cause I actually like and want them sometimes, lol.

      #NoShame

  • Kittenz

    I have a huge problem with video games. I don't care how great of a guy a man is, if he plays video games, I lose interest. Pray for me……

    • AfterMath

      so basically you're single?

  • Uncle Ray

    They forgot wearing jerseys, do rags in public, braids, ten foot afros, swap meet jewelry, sagging pants, skiny jeans, etc.. Just to name a few, thanks for the vent. The sista is right, fellas if you can't let go of these things go by a certain point in life don't expect the females to let go either.

  • AfterMath

    Aint nothing wrong with instant dinners. Whats the point of wasting time cooking food that's just for me? If I'm having company over then sure I'll hit up the produce section but on those nights where I've gotta work late I figure that a Salisbury steak Hungry Man is better than a combo from Micky Dees.

    On the video games, I'm probably an anomaly because of my profession, but I can't imagine getting work done without them. Scratch that, I can imagine it cause I didn't play video games for about 10 years, but now that I've gotten back into them I've saved a lot of money doing work in my living room in front of my PS3 with a game of Madden on instead of going to Borders (may they RIP) or Starbucks ordering 2 or 3 coffees and sitting trying to do my work in the public setting.

    And I was down with the fake plants thing they recommend, but having tried three times last year to take care of a plant I feel like I belong on America's Most Wanted because I killed each one of them. And it wasn't pretty. For the sake of making the place look nice and keeping my guests from thinking negative about me, I decided to just go the fake route. Maybe eventually I'll mix some real ones in there too but it takes time to learn to take care of a plant.
    My recent post The PageRank Algorithm

  • payne well

    I agree with the games things. I'm a great gamer, but it doesn't consume my life and distract me from actual work. Who says you have to grow up all at once?
    My recent post just say you’re ready when all the baggage just ain’t as heavy