10 Silly But Relevant Deal Breakers for Relationships

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I’ve been compiling this list of reasons to breakup with a person that while they may seem absolutely silly is actually telling of deeper and relevant information for a relationship. You may be thinking well if it’s silly how could it be any deeper than you found a reason early on to flee the scene before a crime was committed. Well the reason you flee early is because the breakups over really serious reasons are much harder to walk away from. That’s rough and you’re going to wish you had picked one of these silly reasons.

She doesn’t like your favorite movie

Think about your favorite movie and how many times you’ve watched it over the years. If you’re anything like me, you’ve watched it so many times that not only can you recite every line; you also know the deeper meaning behind the movie. Insert your significant other who thinks that the movie is a bit of a drab. How can you live with a person like that for years knowing that every time you’re watching your favorite movie, they’re yawning or playing on their phone?

She doesn’t like Chinese food

One of my best friends told me that he broke up with a girl in college because she didn’t like Chinese food. I told him that I thought he was ridiculous. He then explained to me what I consider to be the Magna Carta of dating and dining. If someone says they don’t like Chinese food, what they’re saying is they don’t like making decisions. When there’s over 200 items on a menu and you can’t settle on one that’s a sign of bigger problems.

She smells funny

They did a study and it showed that smell is the most powerful memory trigger. If you think back on all the people you dated, you may not remember a lot about them but you damn sure remember their smell. That’s why when you are dating someone who has a peculiar smell, (and I’m not saying they stink, just that they smell), you can’t get over it. Plus, why can’t they smell themselves?!

She likes chunky peanut butter and you like creamy, or she rolls the toilet paper from the back and you from the front, just about anything that has two distinct options and she chooses the other one.

Have you ever lived with someone or had someone replace your toilet paper roll and they have it feeding from the opposite way that you like it? We don’t notice it but the way we make decisions like that are engrained in us in a way that we can’t get over no matter how hard we try. It’s like people who close the shower curtain when they aren’t in the shower and the other can’t understand why it’s such a big deal.

She still has an AOL email address

Anybody who still has an AOL or even a Hotmail email address should be taken out back and put down. This is a sign of a person who is not only still living in the 1990s, but also a person who is totally and unequivocally resistant to change. Get away as fast as you can.

Turn the page for the final five.

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From Our Partners

  • Peter Parker

    "She has an annoying fashion staple" – CO-Sign!!!!
    We call these types BAMMAS!!!! lol

  • http://stanoffewwords.wordpress.com Tristan.

    I had to leave a girl alone because she was just too ditzy, like she would ask me questions and I just couldn't believe I was really about to answer them for a grown woman

  • Mr. SD

    Broke up with 2 diff chick because of the smell thing..no bueno

    • ngahbenoitngah

      It sucks to date girls who have such odour lol
      My recent post How to find love after a breakup

      • snapbackandabigrack

        Does it take that long to find out about an odor problem? I am curious, do you continue to assume the odor is coming from somewhere else until you eliminate all possibilities?

  • DamnPops

    Funny ass list lol

  • rhenewal

    :$

    I still have a hotmail account.

    And Paypal is confusing!

    Guess I’m on the pathway to being dumped. At least I smell good and am otherwise inoffensive (as per this list).

    • Dr. J

      Key question, is it your primary email account?

      • Uncle Hugh, BP

        Dr. J: "Anybody who still has an AOL or even a Hotmail email address should be taken out back and put down. "

        "Key question, is it your primary email account?"

        Now I don't feel so bad. My Hotmail is not my primary account, but I still have it.

        (Shaking my cane at Whippersnapper J): I feel a few years older every time I read this blog. That's why I had to but Uncle in my screen name.

  • Animate

    You can let a hotmail address slide. I joke with my sister about her yahoo address all the time though.
    My recent post The most powerful scene I've ever seen in a video game

  • High_Five_Ghost

    The movie thing is real.

    Story: I dated a girl that loved “Disappearing Acts”. (Wesley Snipes/ Sanaa Lathan) from the black relationship storytelling stylings of Terry McMillan

    For those of you who haven’t seen it, …
    An alcoholic deadbeat sorry man w/ multiple kids somehow hooks up w/ fine @ss Sanaa Lathan’s character (who’s got her ish together). Sorry man starts doing sorry man ish after getting her pregnant. Sorry man leaves both of them to “find himself”. Sorry man returns to say “hi”. Woman takes him back. (THE SAME DAY) Nothing got solved. The child is like 2y/o now. There’s no reason to think anyone has changed and …that’s the end of the movie.

    So, I’m sitting there watching her smile and cry through various parts and thinking to myself WTF? Even while physically putting both hands over my mouth, I still blurted out, “This is the dumbest movie I’ve ever seen.”

    She never called me again.

  • cynicaloptmst81

    CHILLLLL! Let my hotmail address live, LOL! It's the one way to contact me that has remained constant…which makes it fairly simple for people to try to reach me. I do have other email addresses through gmail as well. Great list though. Here are some of mine…

    - an annoying voice…dude had a nasal/mouthful of spit/thick tongue type speaking voice
    - unforgivable attire…dude (a long while back and he was under 25) came to my house with his t-shirt tucked in
    - not musically compatible…dude sent me a super cheesy smooth jazz love song too early in the dating phase
    - sends bad selfies…dude sent me an unsolicited good morning selfie. Like, I was sleep, heard the notification, checked my phone, and was greeted by his taco meat. No sir. LOL. Nope. I am not here for that.
    - horrible grammer… "I like a person who are themselves in being as friends" <—#RealLife

    • amaris79

      Hilariously enough it's my PEOPLE that won't let me switch. I've given my new email dozens of times and STILL find important emails in my aol. I gave up and went back. Plus the gmail groupings annoy me to all heck.

      -Annoying voice for 500, ma'am. I went on a date once with a dude that had Shaggy's singing voice as his speaking voice. It was a short date.
      -Musical compatibility (did we date the same dude?). Also, if all your musical heros are hip-hop artists, we can't be friends.
      -Text grammar. I don't mind shorthand but the same mistake over and over will grate on me, ESPECIALLY if it is a regular part of your lexicon. One day I will snap and say, "It's ma'am, NOT Mam!!"
      -Baby talk, baby speak, baby-ing ANYTHING. I get it. I'm short. Don't pinch my cheeks. I'll punch your knee.
      My recent post Let Award Season Begin!

      • cynicaloptmst81

        LMBO!!!!

        OhEmGee about text grammar! In Baltimore, we are in a text grammar crisis. I'm so sad about it. We may even need Iyanla to fix it.

        Alright = ard
        little/lil = lor

        Why? Just why? I'm so ashamed…

      • paynewell

        I hate getting my cheeks pinched! that is a horrible offense!
        My recent post We need a resolution:New Year’s Resolutions are a waste of time

      • DBoySlim

        This is why I have to send text messages sometimes. I had a girl who spelled you as "yhu" consistantly. I could not take her seriously. SN: Your avi is everything.

      • Bree

        "I'm short. Don't pinch my cheeks. I'll punch your knee. " Love it Amaris….and Do Not try to pick me up. I'm not a damn baby. No matter how short and petite I am I'm still a Grown Azz Little Woman! :)

    • Dr. J

      Did y'all peep that Cyn misspelled grammar? Putting this on your tab and letting you continue to rock tho.

      I don't understand why men think it's a good idea to send d*ck pics without fair warning.

      • cynicaloptmst81

        LMBO! The irony!!!! …though I didn't call out minor spelling mistakes, LOL! But, I'll take that…

        It wasn't a d*ck pic. It was a head shot of him with a tank top on leaning into the camera…and chest hair oozing out of the top. Just gross.

      • Little Lady

        I did but chose to keep my mouth closed

    • bellatrice1

      Your list is hilarious!

      …shirt tucked in and bad selfies, I died.

      I too am a grammar natzi, so if he uses poor grammar or has a Magic Johnson type speech impediment, it just won't work!
      My recent post Why I Want To Marry A Raiders Fan

      • cynicaloptmst81

        "Magic Johnson type speech impediment"

        Laughing out loud!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        • Mr. SD

          she wrong for that..lol

      • skng

        Nazi… sorry I had to do it

        • bellatrice1

          Well, if you want to get technical and ultra-nazi (which I can), I was not using it as a proper noun, as capitalizing it would indicate. I was using it as a word to describe someone who is uber anal, which would render my non-capitalization of the word, nazi, acceptable. Try again.
          My recent post Why I Want To Marry A Raiders Fan

        • skng

          Actually you misspelled it

    • Bree

      lmbao….that list is hilarious Cyn. I can't stand bad selfies or horrible voices and bad grammer.

  • Uncle Hugh, BP

    but = put

  • http://www.lifeisablast.org paynewell

    Someone's voice. Like this guy seemed okay but his voice was so odd and weird that every time he spoke I wanted to laugh. It's hard to take him seriously.
    My recent post We need a resolution:New Year’s Resolutions are a waste of time

    • snapbackandabigrack

      I agree, if a man's voice is not attractive to me I can not listen to him, I find myself talking over him.

  • bellatrice1

    Me and my guy both have aol accounts lol. I use mine as a junk account though, but I think he actually uses his…no biggie!

    Then again, I have about 5 email accounts for different purposes.

    To answer your question, I broke up with a guy after learning that he doesn't brush his tongue (gag!!), but I hardly thought that was a "silly" reason.
    My recent post Why I Want To Marry A Raiders Fan

  • http://twitter.com/MzRaeBaby313 @MzRaeBaby313

    I swear to God I will delete a dude's number if he calls me "baby girl" "bae" or "sweetie"…….or any guy over the age of 25 and/or who has children and doesn't know what the word CONSTITUENTS means….

    • ngahbenoitngah

      Hahahaha, Why you gonna delete his number for calling you sweetie? don't like it ? I enjoy calling my girlfriend Bae and she loves it
      My recent post How to find love after a breakup

  • collegegrl_

    Eww ^ lmao

    Text grammar is so true tho. My brother broke up with his girlfriend after she spelled "favorite" wrong in a text. I thought it was stupid then but when my boyfriend first started texting me his grammar was all wrong *in my mind* Are you serious? Good thing he fixed that, bc that ish disturbed my soul. Grammar and word pronunciation are not little things people.

    And the video games thing. I asked one of the workers at my school what he liked to do in his free time (casually!). He said," Well, I drink a lot… I like to play video games too." Which man, much less a 28 yr old man, lists drinking as a pastime?NO.

    Smell. Hmm, this may be why I'm not more attracted to big, muscular men. I've had more than one instance where this type just smelled like schweddy balls.

    4. bearing any resemblance to R. Kelly…NO.
    5. Using R. Kelly's "Cookie" as your pickup…NOOOOO, EWW!

    Lol, I'm sure I'll discover more.

    • http://twitter.com/MzRaeBaby313 @MzRaeBaby313

      lmfao!! oh yea and dudes who use baby oil…..#icantdeal

  • thriftybynature

    When I find out guys only eat a variation of chicken tenders/breast every where we go, and the only vegetable they eat is ketchup they gotta go.

    • jdoubleu

      I'll never understand the purpose of going out to eat and ordering something you can make at the house or pick up from a bodega

  • Soulflower

    This is Hilarious! Don't know which is funnier the original post or the comments!!! LMFAO

  • Ray

    Still have my Hotmail ten years later ( as my primary). 5 email accounts?????? Who you running from ex's and bill collectors.

    Silliest thing I dumped a female for; Granny panties, drawer full of them.
    Couldn"t get past it.

  • https://www.facebook.com/neverasgoodasthefirsttime Ashanti Gardner

    If you all are breaking up over a few misspelled words or an email account address, then you never really liked that person from the beginning. If you really liked him/her, you wouldn't be having these discussions. No one is every going to be absolutely perfect and on point all the time 24/7. This is the real world, not a Seinfeld episode…(i.e. the low-talker, man hands). Grow up a little, but don't settle for just anything either. You need to pick and chose your battles and deal breakers.

    • collegegrl_

      Well, I doubt someone will breakup with someone over a few (1-3). misspelled words, but misspelled words that happen over and over again indicates a larger education issue. I won't correct a misspelled word in a text; Ill just continue to spell it correctly and hopefully you get the message. I will correct pronunciation though, and if I have to do it too many times I will eventually get annoyed or embarrassed for the person if its in a public place. And no one wants to constantly be corrected either, like they're a child. We're just not compatible.

      I agree w/ the email address though. It's one of the "sillier" ones.

    • MissTwyne

      My sentiments exactly. When you have the time/inclination to sift through the little quirks a person has, the overarching point is that you don't like them…enough. When you like someone a GREAT deal, you will accept at least five or more of the things on the list, and other indiscretions you didn't know you didn't like. IJS…

  • Dala

    If they don't like Subway. I can't trust a man who doesn't like sandwiches.

  • http://glippost.WordPress.com Darrk Gable

    Without going too much into the reasons why…I cosign just about all of Jay’s points. The “fashion staple” is my biggest pet peeve. The Chinese food situation is next. NOTHING I can get think of drives a man crazier than an indecisive woman.

  • sierrasmilez

    I got a couple of strange looks cause I don’t like cheese. But I’m sure the weird voice is annoying. I had that experience. Turn off.

  • sierrasmilez

    The sweetie baby girl or ma is such a turn off. It sounds scripted.

  • http://thesexysinglemommy.net Ty Knighten

    AOL still exists? That just may be a deal breaker for me, too. As for fashion staple…a man who has a chain link attached from his pants to his wallet, wears crocasacks and has ponytails…I think I'll pass. LOL!
    My recent post Help! I Have Been Dickmatized!

  • http://lhatcher2013.wordpress.com/ lhatcher2013

    This list is so on point. The one thing that's silly that I would add to the list would be leaving the house with a scarf on her head. I cannot tell you how bad a look that is. And then for someone i'm with to rock that out in public with or without me? Nah son…..ain't happening.
    My recent post Saturday’s Session

  • Little Lady

    a man who doesn't like (or watch) football. they do exist, I went to college with a few
    I am a HUGE football fan and I can't be with a guy

    I loathe bad grammar and I'm starting to dislike when people shorten words in text messages. People make fun of me but I text in complete sentences, proper grammar, punctuation, all of that. I'm not saying you have to respond in the same manner but I at least want to be able to understand what it is you're trying to tell me.

    • Dr. J

      One of my boys doesn't watch sports at all, it's the weirdest thing ever. He'll have folks over and they'll come in the crib like, "Why you ain't got the game on!?"

  • Kinectic

    Damn. No wonder the divorce rate is over 50%. People are too petty lol. So you’re willing to break up with someone because of their email server? I thought you break up with someone for cheating and stuff. I can’t…

  • nocomment

    THIS ENTIRE POSTING AND THOSE WHO COSIGN:
    Thus why everyone on this post IS single. I can't believe Dr. J's articles are even taken seriously, especially considering how he strives to troll and antagonize every post on this very blog. Or was this supposed to be a joke? Okay, now I get it-haha! Carry on.

    • Confused Dr. J

      You posed a comment as 'nocomment'?

      Bet.

  • http://twitter.com/mssexydanielle @mssexydanielle

    I once stopped dating a guy because he had never heard of UGK. I know, it might sound stupid to some, but how can I involve myself with a man who doesn't understand the genius that is Bun B and Pimp C?!?!? LMAO…but for real, that one small thing to me spoke volumes.
    My recent post New Year, New Vision: 2014 Edition

    • Dr. J

      Not going to lie to you a chick who claimed to be a hip hop head went blank when I mentioned Ridin' Dirty in my Top 10 albums of all time and we ain't spoke since.

    • High_Five_Ghost

      Uuuuugggggghhh!!! (Pimp C voice)

      I met a suburb woman that did'nt know about UGK. I was like, "hell naw", so we stayed in the car until she at least recognized "Tell Me Somethin Good", and " International Players Anthem".

      #canthavethat

  • Cindy

    Cut someone off for not liking green peppers and mushrooms in their spaghetti #ImSuchADude

  • oooh ok…

    OMG, but most of this is my BF!
    LOL! Truly the above "How I met ur mom" pix could be me & my bff talking about my guy. I mean who hasn't seen "Star Wars" or "Jurassic Park"? But the best part is at least he's open minded enough to watch and explore media/life with me. *shrugs*

  • ooh ok…

    Smokers, heavy drinkers, drug users, rude, cocky, moody, and any other vices…. #DealBreakers
    I'm the kind of lady that guys look at as a "good girl" type.
    I say I'm just normal. Whatever.

  • HisQueen

    These comments are hillarious!! I was totally tickled when Dala said she can’t trust a man who doesnt like sandwiches.

    My deal breaker will be dry lips or if every time we talk face to face you have food in your teeth! That tells me you didn’t care enough to check or you don’t care at all. Also bad body order, i mean the kind that comes from eating too much junk food or bad body chemistry. Yep that’ll end it for me.

    Oh and not knowing what these (…) are called and how they’re used.