You know, once in a blue there are some great articles I come across on Facebook. Recently I came across an article called “Why I Dated A Guy Who Hated My Body.” For better reference, feel free to read it here. In this post, the young lady recalls a bad experience with a guy she was dating. To lend some perspective, this is a plus-sized woman I’m referring to. She tells a story of being with her man. He then said something that he could’ve worded better. Before he attempts to kiss this woman he says “You know if you lost some weight you’d be really hot.” “Oh no he didn’t!” is the phrase I can collectively hear you ladies exclaim. And quite frankly, I agree. That statement was a bit insensitive amongst other things.
At the same token, she sheds light on his actions prior to saying this. She speaks on how he would get excited when she said she went to the gym. At times, he would suggest healthier food choices like salad. I can’t be mad at this man in these two instances. He’s dating this woman and seemingly just wants her to be healthy. His comment about her weight was a bit displaced. First off, I wouldn’t say such a thing if I’m trying to get me a little “suga.” Number two, he basically says that her weight is keeping her from being attractive. That begs you to wonder why he’s dating her in the first place.
I’ll leave that for you all to speculate.
This woman seemed to be offended that her man would be happy if she ate a salad. She seemed to not like the fact that he’d be excited to know she went to the gym. If I were him, I’d be happy about that too. I would love for a woman I’m dating to eat decently and stay active. I don’t need a gym rat girlfriend. I just need a lady who doesn’t want to get out of hand health wise. To be clear, I’ve dated plus-sized women. I have no qualms with a chunky girl. I’m fine by it as long as I dig her proportions. But as with everything in life, there’s got to be discretion.
Part of me really feels that the man in question was genuinely looking out for her. Yes, he went about telling his girl the wrong way. But was he so wrong for trying to encourage a healthier lifestyle? In that breath, I say no. But what do you say? Have you ever told a significant other that they could lose a few pounds? Have you ever been asked to lose a few pounds? What’s your take on this whole thing? How do we go about this the right way?
These are my words and I make no apologies.
DamnPops is a writer on the staff at SBM: “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others. ” Brooklyn born dude trying to figure out this life just like you. Come on this journey with me. Follow me on Twitter @DamnPOPS – Damn He Got A Point” (My Column) on Viral Status