Home Advice I Have A Different Beef With Bill Cosby

I Have A Different Beef With Bill Cosby

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You can feel free to call me a 90’s baby. I grew up in the 90’s.

My early years consisted of Saturday afternoon wrestling on Fox 5 after “Life With Louie,” or Dionne Warwick’s Psychic Friends Network. I grew up knowing if I caught “Bobby’s World” after school it was a great day. Beeper gum? Yeah that was me. Johnny Quest every evening? That was me. The amusement park behind Burger King by Kings Plaza? Me again! Another huge part of my growing up was sitcoms. The earliest sitcom I remember watching was The Cosby Show.

The Cosby show was just simply funny to me. I know it showcased our people in a high regard and that was cool. That didn’t really resonate with me strongly till I got a little older and my mother became a single parent. I was born into a pretty middle class lifestyle. I was born into a two parent home. So seeing that depicted on television didn’t blow me away because it was my reality. But again, the show made me laugh. The show gave us ways to solve issues while still showing love albeit tough love.

The brand of Bill Cosby was damn near that of Cliff Huxtable.

He was to be a clean cut, prudent decision maker. An accountable man who revered the value of education and integrity. This is the man that bill Cosby sold himself to be off the set. I believed him. As a preteen I used to read the “Little Bill” series. I dug it. I still think they were good books. So you can understand my dismay, my chagrin when I learned of rape allegations that have followed him for decades.

All stemming from a reference by a stand-up comedian last year, the floodgates opened. Alleged victim after victim came forward saying basically the same thing. They said that Bill Cosby drugged them all and proceeded to have sexual contact with them. Now to me, a twenty-six year old, I never heard such things about Bill. As far as I was concerned, for the better part of two decades Bill Cosby seemed to be as clean as a whistle. I never considered myself to be naïve on this issue either. Everybody has vices, I just never thought there would be this ugly of a side to Bill.

Recently there has been confirmation that Bill Cosby did indeed admit during a 2005 deposition to drugging women with the intention to sleep with them. He asked that the information stay private. This revelation actually took place in 2005 and has now been brought to the light. In 2005 I was in high school and by that point was very much engulfed in my love for hip hop. It was around this time where Bill Cosby really began using his platform to be critical of the hip hop culture. I’m pretty sure he made many comments in the past but I was probably too young to remember that he ever made them. I grew up in the era where Bill was very critical of men wearing pants below their waist. He spoke out against violent lyrics and misogyny depicted in the music.



What he was standing for was perfectly fine.

A common sentiment he had was shared by many of his generation. They never put into context the music and the environments from which it was cultivated. Nevertheless, the standard that Cosby wanted our black culture to live by was a positive one. This all the while continued to fortify that squeaky clean Cliff Huxtable imagery.

For a moment I would like us to assume that all these women consented to sex.

Let us say that the 80’s were crazy and everyone was doing “Spanish Fly.” Let’s say they consented to receiving the Quaaludes. This still means that Cosby was a chronic adulterer. Camille Cosby has stayed with Bill through all of this behavior. This lifestyle isn’t congruent with the type of philanthropic work that they tout. It also isn’t any example of living a life up to the standard that Bill constantly spoke of for our people. That’s my beef with Bill Cosby. He’s a really black pot calling the kettle black. It’s upsetting. It’s disheartening. It’s also indicative that we cannot put all this esteem into any solitary person. We all fall short. Even the preachiest of the preachy like Bill. Bill Cosby should be held accountable for any wrongs he has committed. My millennials should hold Bill accountable for the false life he has shown himself to live. He should be ashamed that the people who embrace a culture he can’t stand probably have more character than he seemingly ever had. It sucks right? This is another example of living more life and learning more lessons. Bill, you got a lot of nerve homie.

What are your thoughts on this whole fiasco?

These are my words and I make no apologies.

DamnPops is a writer and podcaster on the staff at SBM: “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others. ” Follow me on Twitter @DamnPOPS and @NegroPPodcast . Also, subscribe on iTunes to the Negro Please Podcast and visit our website here!

  • DBoySlim

    I’ve had a disdain for Mr. Cosby for a while. His whole condescending tone toward our generation regarding respectability politics turned me off. He sounded like the old man who yells “Get off my lawn” while he cartwheels on the grass of someone else.

    • Damnpops

      Yeah as I grew older I understood that he and many others wouldn’t embrace much of the culture at the time. He would be overtly condescending. I still figured someone deeming to possess all the decorum he supposed many of us lacked would have been more of a stand up person. I don’t know if there has ever been a greater fall from grace.He’s disgusting.

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      Hi, I and my ex boyfriend broke up about 7 weeks now. We’ve been together for 4 years. We had so many issues during in our relationship. We got engaged and eventually he changed his mind not to get married soon and told me he doesn’t want kids. It broke my heart. He also told me that culture differences is another problem between us. When we broke up I beg many times. He told he doesn’t want to go back in to our relationship and he wants us to move on. I stayed another 2 weeks with him cwhile I am looking for a new place. we had sex a couple times. He told me he just want us stay as friends.
      When I moved out, he didn’t txt or call but when we each other we are fine talking like a friend. Is there anyway that i can win him back? that was the question i asked my sister and she told me he have had an encouter with the famous love doctor and i contacted him and he prayed for my relationship and my boyfriend came back to me and my relationship was restored and now we will be getting married soon. Please get to know him and ask for his help on ([email protected]). The love doctor is the best and will help you 🙂

  • langwichartz

    See this is the problem I have with that sentiment. It’s predicated more on the fact that he spoke out against the less appealing aspects of hip-hop culture or as y’all call it today “respectability politics.” Granted, what he has been accused of doing and what he has admitted to doing (so far) is heinous. What baffles me is that we are supposed to forget all the good he has represented in his career because of what he has done in his private life. Many of us have facets of our lives that if people had access too wouldn’t be too proud of us, does that undo any good we’ve done in our lives. I don’t doubt Cosby’s involvement, however I do question the timing of the swarm of people coming forward. Call me a conspiracy theorist, but I don’t think its a coincidence. MLK had a sordid history as an adulterer, however we don’t focus on that aspect of his life when we speak of him. Are we being selective on who we hold to what standard? Are we truly being objective and thinking about the whole situation critically? I comment not attempting to exonerate Cosby, I only want us to view this situation objectively and think about it critically and understand its not as black and white as we would like it to be. We can’t take the easy road by just blaming him or blaming the alleged victims.

    • Damnpops

      i respect that sentiment as well. Yes everyone just coming out of the woodwork does make one scratch their head. I tend to believe the women though. I guess people wonder what’s behind the timing. I really do agree with you on all accounts. My words just come from a place of having witnessed all of what I wrote so i feel connected to the Cosby brand, his comments etc. You’re right about MLK, maybe I would have similar perspective if i had found out about his stuff after following him my whole life. i guess it’s just the timing. I think we both raise good points.

      • langwichartz

        I don’t doubt any dubious shenanigans went on, but I refuse to believe that he is this “monster” the flag-waivers want to make him out to be. Nor will I subscribe to the notion that I have to dismiss any good the man has represented in his career.

    • StraightShooter

      Aldutery is different from rape.

      • Damnpops

        It sure is, the point I was trying to get to was that even if someone would argue that you couldn’t prove these acts were rapes, the fact still remains that he was involved in some very unflattering things outside of his marriage. Whether or not Camille was okay with this is their business. But to perpetuate such an image of integrity and squeaky clean living and do condemn other folks for how they live is where he was wrong as well.He lived in a glass house but was throwing stones is really my point.

        • StraightShooter

          I understand your sentiment, but I certainly don’t agree with it. It seems to take the focus off of the women, which is dangerous. Many Black people want to focus on how they feel about Bill’s actions and the things he has said. He is a rapist and that’s the way the conversation around Bill Cosby should be had. Anyways, my comment wasn’t directed at you, but at Langwichartz.

        • Damnpops

          Another person has also said that this piece comes off as downplaying another aspect of what has gone on here (the actual women being drugged, raped, and them coming forward). That certainly wasn’t the goal. The goal was only to highlight another side to this situation that I do not think is spoken about. I think it is important because I think it was the brand he sold that has left many people questioning the validity of the women who came forward. many people were in denial because they couldn’t separate the man from the brand. If my post came off as dismissive to these women that I’ll surely apologize for that. I was just looking to have another conversation to add to all that we are already addressing. I think it has a place within all of this is all. This post was to explain to doubters that no matter how you cut it, wrong was done here

      • langwichartz

        I don’t believe I even mentioned his infidelity. I mainly raised the point of how many are using this scandal to dismiss anything the man did positive in his life/career. Hypocrite, yes (many of us are in some way), Rapist, according to perspective, Monster that has only preyed on women, I won’t co-sign on that one. Trying to be objective doesn’t mean you think Bill is innocent.

        • StraightShooter

          Comparing Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King to Cosby is comparing adultery to rape.

    • I agree @langwichartz:disqus

      The man built a successful and longstanding career on uplifting and empowering a nation of Black people. And he did so openly and with firm vigor in the face of a powerful industry that thrives off the promotion of negative images of black people.

      Yes he has done quite a bit of PR throughout his entire career by promoting an untouchably squeaky clean image for himself, to which he is now suffering the consequences amidst some very alarming allegations. But it seems many want to hang this man now not because he presently stands accused of some heinous acts, but because he lived his life as a hypocrite.

      Burn this hypocrite at the cross they say. Perhaps. But his works, his legacy, his philanthropy – why that too? What does one have to do with the other?

      Mr. SoBo
      OpinionatedMale.com

      Latest Post: The “i” In Black Lives Matter: When 3/5ths Become Responsible For Their Own Freedom

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  • Es Sully

    You know Lil, I feel you on this one but I can’t agree 100%. His actions were ABSOLUTELY deplorable and disgusting. There is no way around it and no excuse for it. For goodness sake, you’re Bill Cosby…you didn’t need drugs to get these women to drop their undies…lol But on the other hand, I can’t let that take away from the things he preached or challenged within our culture (although I don’t agree with a lot of his view of Hip Hop). I can’t completely do away with him because there was some positive in his career which actually shaped my childhood views on the Black family. So I can’t just cancel him out. Even if I am disgusted with his actions, I have to acknowledge his good days.