99% Failure Rate


I always find it funny how people treat relationships and dating. While there is the emotional investment and all that BS, I often hear people (especially females) complaining that “I will never find anyone else”, or “I’m going to be alone forever”, or <random complaint of loneliness>. Well I am here to expose a rather interesting (yet glaringly obvious) statistical fact that seems to surprise people when I say it, but seems so common sense to me. The truth is:

99% of Relationships End in Failure!

Now you may say, “how did you come up with that statistic SBM?”. To that I promptly reply, “shut up … think about it”.

Yes people, lets think about it. You only marry one person (if you do marry someone). There are a few situations (polygamy and threesome relationships) that end in you finding more than one “special someone”, but obviously that isn’t the norm.

Realistically, for us normal people … you marry one person (or at least end up dating one into eternity). That means that every single other relationship before that person failed. It could have been 100 people (making a 99% failure rate) or it could have been 10 (90& failure is still bad), but the fact is you had to fail at relationships a lot before finding someone.

See Also:  From Her Perspective: 4 Dating Mistakes We Make

So my plea to the world (starting to notice a lot of my posts are aimed to educate and end in some plea … go figure) … is people … relationships end … and they end often. Stop entering relationships thinking your going to be together forever (act like this to give yourself the best chance, but don’t be naive to the fact there is a good chance it will end). More than likely, your going to break up with the person and will recover and move on. If not, you’ll be happy forever. Its nice to buy every lottery ticket hoping to be that one person to win, but realistically you know there is a good chance you won’t win. You don’t go planning your life “knowing” your going to win the lottery … and I say the same thing applies here. Don’t plan your life around the 1%.

Am I being too pessimistic … or does everyone see the truth in my “numbers”?


  1. At first I didn't know where you were going with the 99 percent rule but after reading it, I agree that you shouldn't "plan your life around the 1%."

  2. I see the truth in your numbers but I do think you sound kind of pessimistic. You don't enter every relationship thinking "this is my husband/wife" but at a certain age, you have to figure out early on if the person is someone who could be in your life for the long term. When I'm 27, any man that I date I'll have to at least think about if he could be a long term person pretty early on because I want to be married and settled by 30. But at 17, there's really no need to worry about long term situations.

    And whether or not u could be a long term person would be based on your job, your life goals, level of education, and what you're looking for in a relationship. At 27, I'd want to know these things somewhere between dates 1 and 4.

  3. My theory has always been that for every 10 men/women you meet, MAYBE one will be a person who you go on to have anything remotely serious. Meaning anything the introductory phone conversations or the awkward first date. So I agree with your statistic… its sad but true.

  4. Even at 17 you have people jumping off of bridges becuase their girlfriend broke up with them. I think people tend to not realize how easily and often relationships die.

  5. The main thing is how one approaches the relationship. Some people who would agree with this post would be more likely to focus on the 99% chance that it won't work out, and cheat themselves out of the 1% possibility simply because they neglect to do a lot of the things that would've made it a reality. I mean, why bother, right?

    You are cautioning people to stop entering relationships thinking that forever is on the menu, but there are lots of others who need to stop entering relationships with the mindset that it is doomed from the word get. My advice would be for people to be open to either possibility; in other words, a healthy dose of reality is key, but as long as the person doesn't have any FCFs, don't rule out forever.


Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get SBM Delivered

Get SBM Delivered

Single Black Male provides dating and relationship
advice for today's single looking for love

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This