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Rantings of an SBM


Its Friday again … so time to release so stress at the end of the week.

  • I haven’t admitted it … but I love white women.  My last girlfriend was caucasian and while I do date black women, they have continued to depress me and convince me why I will marry a white woman.  Last black woman I dated, asked her to make me a sandwhich … and she laughed.  My ex was making me them after 2 weeks.  Would have made a whole post on it … but thats doing too much.
  • I barely go to the club anymore.  I feel like I’m way too young to have outgrown the club, but damn if it just doesn’t do it for me.  I used to love crowded clubs (I’m a big guy so I just moved people) … but now I can’t stand people touching me.  Its hot, I want to sit down, and damn if girls at the club don’t even do it for me.  Besides … women aint touching their toes anymore … whats the point.
  • I was joking about the white woman thing.  I love my Nubian Queens (unless your an angry bitter b*tch … can’t stand ya’ll).
  • I miss my old car.  I had an Acura TL, sold her for something “practical”, then got so bored I bought a motorcycle.  Now I miss her … soooooooo much!
  • I really love breasts.  I just don’t understand why so many guys are ass men.  I will admit that a great ass can make you double take quicker then nice breasts … but when it matters (sex) … the breasts offer hours of fun.  You can push em up … down … around … squish them together … pull them apart … the options are endless.  An ass … you can smack it … what else?
  • “My Dougie … My Dougie … My Dougie … she says she likes my Dougie (I’m fresh) … My Dougie (I’m Fresh) … I’m Flyer than a motherf*cker!”
  • My “first” didn’t believe I was a virgin.  She refused to believe that I had never had sex with anyone else.  You would think hearing something like that could make you lazy … happy … complacement.  But not me … felt like I had a bar to meet now.  Just so she never saw a “degradation” in quality, I analyzed everything I did, identified the good things, and dropped the bad.  That is the reason I now waaaaaayyyyyyy overthink sex.  I guess the satisfaction of others at the cost of myself … eh.
See Also:  Rantings of an SBM

Thats it for me.  I feel a lot better.

Now … good people of singleblackmale.net … family … whats on your mentally checked out, is it 5 o’clock yet, I don’t want to be here, the weekend started at 9am, ITS FRRRIDDDDAAAYYY mind.




  1. 1) I'm first to comment

    2) No work today, but I got paid from last week.

    3) I definitely need to buy a months worth of slacks..this will be accomplished slowly throughout the summer.

    4) Shaking my head at all of the this I will be doing this academic year. I will be working 3 jobs, be a full time student, President of a club, doing clinical's that start of 6:30 am, and attempting to have some kind of a social life. At the same time I love being busy, I get a rush at planning my day and accomplishing all my tasks.

    5) I received my scholarship check..yay..I'm using that to pay off the remainder of the tuition from this past year.

    6) I hate getting ready to go out, then last minute after I am ready, plans are canceled.

    7) My dating life? Non-existence, except for the ex's who seem to look through their phonebooks, see my name, and decide to call me…or as the last one expressed…have a dream about me and "our future kids"

    8) Tired of my older 6'5 muscular brother scaring off potential prospective by mean mugging them and breathing flames. I need him to stop raining on my parade, or I will have to get revenge.

  2. 1. It's early as hell…but I'm excited it's finally Friday!

    2. Had sex a good four times last night – – – needless to say, my kitty-kat is purrrrrring right now (SORE).

    3. There's something about being in a relationship almost two years with the same man and the sex is NEVER boring. Mmm mmm mmm….better than cambell's soup on a cold winter night.

    4. Swallow or not to swallow…that is the new question *thinking* (lol); excuse me ya'll, I'm feeling a little nasty/kinky this morning

    5. Hmmm, if the storms hold off…I will be hiking in the morning — and yes there are black women who hike and love it!

    6. I need to start my own company so I can work from home

    7. Tuesday thru Friday should be jeans (casual) day…not just Friday

    8. So after strong thoughts about it, I decided to not rent the lambo for the BF's bday. It's just going to cost too much overall for me; not to mention I'm paying for the party itself and all the food for 30 or more bastards. But it's a great idea for ANOTHER time – he's worth it.

    9. Soooooo, since I'm not doing the lambo thing – – – I thought about hiring two strippers to pull up on motorcycles in racing gear and give him a "clean/normal" show (if there is such a thing). LMAO…I'm such a great girlfriend, lol. HAVEN'T DECIDED ON THAT ONE YET.

    10. I'm craving some thai food right now. Skip breakfast…just give me some chicken fried rice and spring rolls…I'm good.

    11. I should have called in sick and had sex all day – but the kitty can't handle it. She needs to recover from yesterday first.

    12. I'm feeling domestic. Maybe I'll go to the grocery store and prepare something special for dinner tonight. *Pondering*

  3. 1 – If SBM say something about his Dougie…Imma SCREAM!

    2 – I'm tired.

    3 – Survived the pain I've suffered from my personal trainer.

    4 – Blk people also like white water rafting and canoeing.

    5 – Ms. Freckles, if you are a seafood lover, may I suggest preparing shrimp and grits, peacan crusted grouper and aparagus.

  4. @Ms. Freckles – Fishsticks! We don't want you hospitalized. If I think of something else, I'll run it pass you.

  5. 1. I've been accused twice this week of being superficial. Oh well. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but who wants to 'beholding' a badger.

    2. I've been poked with needles all week, only for my dr. to tell me, "Oh, I forgot to request this blood test"…He doesn't understand the needle anxiety I have.

    3. So the significant other still continues to talk constantly about his job, I realized this week he hasn't yet asked how I was feeling in regards to my health, or asked if I needed help with anything. All I can say is, "Houston, we have a problem". Especially when I have two friends who are coming down from Long Island for a weekend in Bmore, and they've offered everything under the sun. Get going. Get Gone. Will be the convo this evening.

    4. I'm not motivated to work. Tuesday was the first day in two weeks that I actually went into my office, and that was only for 3 hrs. I think day by day, I'm becoming more of an introvert.

    5. I need something different with my hair. I don't want to cut it, and I don't plan on using the creamy crack, I love my curls..but the lions mane is getting out of hand. And if another person asks to touch it, I'm going to scream.

    6. After the 4th of July, I'm going vegan. Not b/c I want to, god knows I love a medium rare porterhouse, but b/c from doing my research it's the best thing to do for Lupus, when you don't want to medicate yourself.

  6. @blak chik – it's time to cut the military loser out of your equation! lol. Dude sounds like a bore anyway. Who needs that in 2008!!! You know what you should do the next time he starts talking about his job? You should shove your tongue down his throat and tell him to shut up. Or just start text messaging someone in front of him and humming.

  7. 1. Ms Freckles is making me miss my man…4 times last night – LOVELY…I think I made him cum 3 times Tuesday

    2. I'm getting a new GEMINI tattoo this weekend

    3. I'm drinking way too much coffee

    4. Need new lace panties…

    5. SBM scared me with the white chick thing..I was hoping that was a joke..but hey to each his own

    6. I've only been with one white guy..he was small..it was oral only…in college…never again

    Happy Friday..SBM!! *smooches*

  8. I. hate. you. for this entire post!!! LOL!!!

    I have an Acura TlL I love it. It's forest green with flakes in the paint. I gotta spoiler too and peanut butter interior. Stop hating. LOL!

  9. 1. So I actually made it in to work after dropping my daughter off to day camp, stopping by the hair salon and chatting with my friend/stylist/shop owner, pulling into McD's for breakfast and stopping by my local car wash for a quick clean…needless to say I almost boycotted the day entirely…if it wasn't for the 1st of the month right around the corner I would have.

    2. My boss wasn't even here…..go figure…geesh.

    3. Man I'm glad my summer classes are over but if these damn folks in my group for this project don't act right I swear I'm gonna get ignant on their asses.

    4. Man, sex 4 times in one night…*sighing*…I think it's time for a trip to D.C. since Rone baby claims to be so sexually attentive.

    5. I remember the last time I swallowed the guy had funky spunk…it tasted like bleach and asparagus…he was a weed smoker and you could taste the gunja in his spunk…ewwwww. *gagging*

    6. Damn I'm happy I can wear jeans everyday if I wanted to…one time for higher learning.

    7. I'm thinking Freckles should most DEFINITELY go with the strippers on the bike…man I wish I was there for that party, niggas AND strippers….whew, the fellas will see me as an angel after that scene.

    8. I can't believe that some men have NEVER had fish and grits…damn, how could you not have. I guess it really is a southern thing…don't worry I got you.

    9. I'm thinking I should start dating white guys…they seem to be completely enamored with all this chocolate…shit what do I have to lose.


    11. I am soooooo happy that my daughter is going with her father for the next couple of weeks, lawd knows I need a break…I wonder if I can convince him to keep her for the rest of the summer…hmmmm.

  10. FunkyBlackChic you need to drop the navy guy….so sad, what a waste. An alpha in uniform always does it for me…but this guy seems like he obsessed with himself.

    Lupus huh, that must be tough. I don't know anyone who has had it, but I know what illness can do to a person's spirit. Stay strong girl…and know that you will get no pity from me on future posts…ur subject to my wrath like everyone else…but for now *hugs*

  11. 1) All this talk about sex is about to make me call my 'break glass in case of emergency' dude. I've been good since March, damn you heffas!

    2) My boss isn't here either. Did I mention that he never tells me when he isn't going to be here?

    3) I either want sushi for lunch or with cocktails after work. Fuck it, I'll do both.

    4) Why is this dude who told me I was a tad too aggressive, sniffing around my back door AGAIN. Then he backdoor texted my homegirl who introduced us talking about I got him open. WTFH??? You dudes are mad predictable.

    4) Funky Black Chick: I don't want you to dump your dude but the next time he starts talking about work, stick something in his mouth. Like your pussy. Bet his ass shuts up then.

    5) I am seriously contemplating doing a 5K in January 2009. Ya'll think I should??? Did I mention me a bigger girl? My trainer thinks I can do it. I think he's on crack.

    6) I need to return this stuff to Old Navy.

    7) I want some zebra print peep toes with a mary jane strap. Is that so HARD to find???

    8) All the white men at my job stare at my breasts. It's hilarious to catch them in the act.

  12. TIH: First off ROTFLMAO!!!!! Secondly, Eathan LOVES sushi, maybe you should chat him up…that only dating white stuff is a load of croc by the way. He just needs a little love and attention.

    If you really want to find the shoes, I suggest you peruse my fav shoe site. http://www.lovemyshoes.com

    Girl they had a 50% sale in January and I bought 9 pairs of shoes that month and another 3 in February…give them a looky.

    And SBM yo ass better not delete this as much as everyone else put site links on here.

  13. 1. I love working from home. But sometimes I miss people so I work at Starbucks. And now I have fallen in love with my barist(er). He sho can steam my breve to the exact temperature. Could the love affair actually work on $12/hr?? I'll have to ponder this in the N.O at the Ritz Carlton next week.

    1a. They should start selling alcohol after 8. passion tea lemonaide marguarita MUCH!!!

    2. God Helps Those Who Help Themselves…I sould like a republican. But its true, if you take the first step, God makes the next.

    2a. God is Good. I think I need to tell and show that MORE.

    3. This guy told me last night that he was "different". I'm surprised my first reaction wasn't WHATEVER!!! Am I actually meeting better men, or do they have better game.

    3a. I'm feeling quite "as a man thinketh" today.

    4. If I hear one more person complain about putting premium gas in a RR I'm going to shoot them. When you bought the (60-90k) car, this is what you signed up for PREMIUM and THE MARKET and the market sets the price not Opec.

  14. ….rant continued:

    12. I really need to get my nails done, they look absolutely ridiculous. SBM what you got on my hair and nails…lol. You're the site daddy and my daddy always pay to take care of me.

  15. LMAO @ Teacia's #5…YUK!!!!!

    Ladies, I do NOT recommend going at it with your mate more than twice in a 6 hour timeframe. It's not healthy for your vagina and trust me…you will be hurting later if it was good! lol

  16. Im going to hammer this point home.

    EAST african women or Asian

    EAST african women or Asian

    EAST african women or Asian

    get one who is 28 and has already finished her PHD, or graduating from your local Ivy league school. Treat her nice, go to zales, continue to treat her nice (because she will not have the hostility towards you that women of yoru own race will), the odds of finding an unmarried asian woman are slim..but the odds of finding an unmarried degreed east african woman are HIGH! both will be a ton more sleek than what your used to. You will get a ton less flack from "your own" when seen with east Africans or asian. I would also reccomend the pakistani women who are muslim but I highly dobut you would be able to find many that are unmarried. Islamic raised women in general are more compassionate and morally structured than your christian US women…. in my opinion. so if you come across one who is willing to date you I would highly advise it… besides Indo asian/black children are so cute.

    so heres the HNIC guide for victory once you find your east african/asian bride.

    Buy condo


    Buy Townhouse


    Buy new cars


    buy a cat

    buy a dog

    Build your own personal study

    Love your mate and children

    be happy

    Die loved

  17. darni we need an edit function SBM.

    I ment to say WEST african women… not east. Serria leone , GHanna, senigal and especially NIGERIA!!

  18. i actually think east was what you meant. You wrote it 5 times, thats as cognitive as it gets.

    Best wishes…so I guess no behavior modification will be needed from you. Since emotionally you are as perfect as they come.

    I still think you need to start your own similiarly minded blog containing all the musings that you dazzle us with.

  19. you wonder why the normal middle class black guys say they think the normal middle class black woman is too difficult to date but I cant even make a post without the two most attractive black women on this blog slaming poking holes or ridiculing me about it… …… amazing.

    Thats about as smart as "black men just like white women because they give head" then 4 blogs later "Fuck that Ill never give a guy head, I may give head to my husband but thats about it" but in yoru own blogs "I dont understand why our men would rather have their white trophies insted of their own women"

    fukin A you answer your own questions all the time!

    at this point ANYTHING is better than a woman who suffers from ABWS and is blaming you as the black man for the failures of her fathers and wrong men she herself chose.

  20. insert foot…into your mouth….last time I shook maternal family tree, voila…Haitian + Asian …and I have pics.

    Most black folks in this country can go reachin in trees for multiple other ethnic groups and find them. But most don;t go around uplifting one to discount the other. So in the words of Teacia…try try again.

  21. oh I have a happy story!

    I reached one of "THEM" last night! THem meaning a sufferer of ABWS.

    I met her lastnight at a social outing for journalist in the city. After breaking the ice with my normal slap stick overly happy "OMG another black journalist we are multiplying!" we hung out and spoke for a bit.

    35, single , no kids, and then she said the magic 3 words that made me horny… working on her P . H . D but later found out she is stalled on it because her work wont pay for it. I was turned on none the less!

    She informed me after I turned and spoke to a tall thin blonde former co worker of mine at bloomberg "oh your one of THOSE" meaning black men who liked white women I guess. She informed me that she didnt date black men at all.

    ya I was shocked. but I had to find out more. Spoke to her the whole night and eventually after telling her she shouldnt black all black men for the failures of our fathers and older cousins and joe thug and shareef hood, I actually broke her icy heart a bit and had her agree to grab a bite to eat outside of the function.

    she says she would rather be alone than date but then also agreed with me that "in theory" being married and happy is more important than having a great job (but would not agree that dating/having a boyfriend is more important that a job which is ironic)

    after we ate and spoke and I showed her not all men are as bad as we appear on TV she actually began to LAUGH with me, and not at me and didnt roll her eyes at me as much either. I feel like I reached her, and she even said she still dosent date black men, but would go on a date with me.

    Had to laugh at that one, as I told her this kinda WAS a date 😉

    Very happy with that one night of results. I can get backlash from comeback and Teacia for the rest of the year but last night seeing a sista go from hostile to even.. and then to happy and have hope was VERY refressing.

    I have to figure out a nickname for her so I can write more about her.

  22. ????

    "“Fuck that Ill never give a guy head, I may give head to my husband but thats about it”"

    "“I dont understand why our men would rather have their white trophies insted of their own women”

    I never said that. What I said was I appreciate my good clean bill of health, so why am I "headin" random men. In my personal opinion and for me, it belongs in a committed relationship (ie marriage) so me putting my own personal and gynological health ahead of some random, dyck and harry–ABWS?? LOL good

    Im telling you the sciences are right up your alley. You draw the best correlations and causations that I have ever seen. A journalist (btw I thought you were in IT) does not a scientist make, though they are not mutally exlcusive.

  23. "““I dont understand why our men would rather have their white trophies insted of their own women"

    who the hell wrote this????

    I think a man has a right to love whomever he wants. When he does it again to exlcude and mask his own hatred…i take issue.

  24. Hasani isn't good with this quotes…no one ever said the head thing…yall of course know I didn't. I told him good luck on his african/asian quest and nothing more.

    ….Sani baby your insecurities made you feel like my statement was ridiculing you, when frankly i don't have the time nor energy to entertain those insecurities any longer. But for some reason you feel that you can constantly belittle us by posting your rants of how we can/will never make a black man happy…while attempting to identify those you who you THINK can. Unfortunately sweetie, this is the pool of women you have to deal with…you can either deal or…and I say this with all the love in my heart…KICK ROCKS!

    I wish I could be that chic for you, but I can't. Again I say, good luck on your quest…and I hope you find yourself somewhere along the way, because the you that you are on here is most certainly an unattractive one.

  25. this back and forth is very interesting to read. i think in the end, we can all agree that in general, stereotyping is bad and that we can't help who we love or convince ourselves that we are attracted to.

    sbm, why would your last black girlfriend laugh when you asked her to make you a sandwich…? did you somehow ask her in a degrading way? if you asked nicely and she still responded that way, well that reflects on her and not the entire population of black women. i absolutely love taking care of the men that i date, and i'd make sandwiches from day one if that gesture is met with reciprocity.

    i don't work, therefore everyday is a friday!! 🙂

  26. Dear Teacia:

    I. hate. you.

    You sent me to that link with ALLLLLLLLLL those shoes.

    That is a crime against humanity. I don't get paid until Monday. I have logged the website in my phone.

    You are not right!

    That is all.

    Hatefully yours,


  27. SBM, this is my time at your spot.

    Today, I cleared some emotional baggage that had me in love with a good friend of mine, but I realized that it was mostly infatuation. I feel so much better that I have decided to let things BE and to let people BE. To Accept the situation for what is and not blame anyone, but realize that everything that I view as problem is really coming up in ME so that I deal with ME and move pass what I think is supposed to be going and heal in that area.

    LOVE has no color. However, I do KNOW that I love the black man and will stand with him. I also understand that it's not easy being black and male in America and that is why black men will ALWAYS have my support because they were/are the first Kings among us. And we black women are the first Queens.

    Black men take your positions! Because you have beautiful black woman that love you want you and need you! Those are rants for today.


  28. TIH…the best part is that the shipping and handling is the same no matter how many pairs of shoes you buy. I paid 6.95 in s&h for 9 pairs of shoes…and they ALL kinds, ALL brands, cheap shoes, expensive shoes, shoes on sale. I got a pair of Anne Klein wedge sandals that were $109.99 in the store for 35 bucks off the site during it's super sale…you can't beat that with a stick.

    I haven't been on there PURPOSELY in the past 2 months…I get sucked in everytime I go, but I love that love to hate it…lol.

    Have a great weekend chic!!

    And Freedom WELCOME to our dysfunctional family…Hasani will be ESTATIC that you're here!!!

  29. DAMMIT!!!

    TIH I went to the site after I left here KNOWING THAT I shouldn't have. *quietly sobbing*

  30. 1. Why does Justin the Slayer wear sunglasses and shoes…I mean there was a whole episode of him up on the ass in the middle of the bed with nothing but some timberlands….I mean, I am still ob sabatical from watching madness (read:porn) anymore…this is all from past memories. *but don't go to my blog blowing up my spot about madness..I gotta rep to uphold dammit*

    2. Being with out job…that's the nice part…I have been staying up to 5am and waking up at 2pm. Good thing is that I am not eating as much as I used to when I was working…

    3. I lied and said I was allergic to cats. I'm not. But what freakin' man actually has cats for pets. Gay.

    4. I'm liking that a black man likes titties more than ass…'cause lord knows my FLASS gets no play…but they love to see me coming…they ain't big but they are handfulls. Remember that dear readers when I reach Maryland…and dudes from NY…yo, look me up SON!

    5. Last rant… I live in Harlem…why the hell was this man up hella early yelling…"I've got a dream…from every mountain top." Problem is, he didn't know the rest so he'd just start over again with…I've got a dream…

  31. Oh…SBM…I KNOW eactly what you mean about the sandwich thang…

    We had a good session…and when he got up to use the restroom, I smacked on the ass as he got out of the bed and asked him to make me a sandwich and get me a bottle of water….shoooo, I was dehydrated.

    This muthfcka actually was O-ffended. No, seriously. Told me I was suppose to make him one. I was like, dude,…first one out the bed gets the food!! Just like the last one out of the bed makes it…

    It's a tricky situ for him now…he can't get out first in fear I won't feed him…but he can't try and make himself too comfortable thinking he'll have to make the bed…heeheehee

    So what!

  32. Hello Family miss you guys, I will probably have to go and read yesterdays post. Looked like a good one. To all newcomers WELCOME.

    My rants…

    -The news I wanted last Friday on my rants I got on Monday I am quite HAPPY.

    – I went to the best free concert today at the Taste of Chicago. Chaka Khan and Angie stone

    – My ex(my love) and I are talking everyday. Its like we are best friends again back in high school. He has a girlfriend though so its like I not looking more into it. Sometimes I feel bad, but he is my friend we share almost everything with each other. Is it wrong that we are talking? Yeah maybe so since I wouldn't want it done to me.

    – This other guy let's call him Cali was suppose to meet me at a club 2 weeks ago and never showed up. He didn't call and say a word. He was a FwB Nov'07 toi Feb'08 then he did a disappearing act for a little bit. Anyway he called today like everything is cool, asking me why haven't he heard from me. Well what the hell are we suppose to talk about. I don't like flaky ass people.

    -Welcome back Comeback

    -SBM I will make you a sandwich honey…lol

    – It has been really nice nights here lately the wind is so relaxing.

    – I miss my uncle

    -Now that I have my next school year in order, I haven't done to much thinking just relaxing enjoying Chicago.

    -I am having a housewarming party in TX, although I am moving in my new place in Chicago. Is that crazy? Most of my friends and family are back home.

    – I been getting some GREAT sex from my friend. This week I have learned that he does STUPID shit which is a total turnoff. Do I drop the good sex because he is a fucking idiot at times. It's so sad because there is a great guy hiding under the idiot…sighing missing the great sex.

    – I really need to look for some more tution money before Sept.

    Ok that's it for me folks. Feel free to give me some advice

  33. Ms. D congrats that the great news, I know how anxious you were last weekend to find out.

    Hmmmm, the ex huh, well here's my theory on dating men..if he's not married then he's not taken. Now granted I do allow room and respect for those who are in a serious relationship and are steadily working towards somethign more, but a chic of 3 months doesn't count. But I don't myself all worked up over something as fragile as a possible casual relationship. For example, I have a homeboy here in Jax who is sooo my type, he's sweet, attractive and ambitious…oh and super smart, but he has a girlfriend who he LOVES. He mentioned it when we first met, and from that moment on I have/will never come on to him.

    Black love is a beautiful and I can respect a man who knows what he has and doesn't want to risk losing that. He doesn't put himself in compromising positions(i.e. talking to his ex all the time), so what he has means a lot to him. Now having said that, because this guy is your ex you need to fall back for your own self-preservation. If he's not getting everything he needs from her, then it's not fair to you to fill him in on what he's missing…and you will be more inclined to because of your past history. You're a very smart and mature woman, you know what's best for you…I suggest you put aside what you wish you two were and accept what you actually are.

    As far as your beau goes, I say before you bounce you should at the very least address your concerns with him, you never know, it may actually make a difference. But if that fails then bounce, I don't believe in staying around for good even great sex. There are entirely toooo many men who know how to put it down to stick around just for that. I say look for an even balance.

  34. I really really really want to hear the entire post on dating black women versus dating white woman. I think the issue… which it seemed from you one-liner…was based solely on a woman catering to you. Also interested to learn in which city you live in. So please… thanks!

  35. Oh and I saw that you were joking but I'd still like to see a post of a compare and contrast the differences from a male point of view… and as real that I know you will be with it

  36. EB you may want to visit Eathan's site…he has an entire site dedicated to dating women of the other races…mainly white.

  37. If I could list all the ways that black men have disappointed me, I could write a book. I experienced the exact opposite of what you have experienced. I made sandwiches for my boyfriends, only to have them take it for granted. Every black guy that I've dated has cheated on me, abused me either emotionally or mentally, lied, acted like they were doing me a favor. Plus, I know that my dating options are limited because I'm a plus-size woman but then, I've seen the same black men berate black women for being overweight and then turn around and date an overweight white woman. I think SOME but not all black men are also threatened if you make more money or have more education than them. I think black men take black women for granted but if you check out http://bfinterracialmarriage.blogspot.com/, you see that black women are starting to wise up.

  38. yes Mari but if I could list the number of sites and editorials and movies and tv shows, complaining from a black womans perspective about the failures of black men I could write a book movie or… hey wait a minute!

    I wouldnt say black men take black women for granted we are actually out there./.. I mean here trying to actively be loved and love someone. if you are trying to use a resourse, thats not taking it for granted. I view the black woman as Uranium. The most powerful resource in the world if harvested. but for every deposit of pure uranium you find theres a contaminated deposit that can kill and corrupt everything around it.It can be such a dangerous thing to harvest… that many would try and use an easier source of power…. like Oil.. or even steam.. or another form of weapon like gunpowder or a knife. But truth be told, nothing is like Uranium, but it will just take time and more research to figure out the best way for us to pick safer deposits from potential contaminated ones.

    I love uranium… I really do. to me nothing is more beautiful to behold as its power unleashed. Im trying to find.. actually I am GOING to find…. a pure source to start my empire with…..

    even if it kills me.

  39. Mari

    I think we as black women should be VERY VERY careful to not accuse SOME black men of what we ourselves are doing as well.

    You wrote: "Plus, I know that my dating options are limited because I’m a plus-size woman but then, I’ve seen the same black men berate black women for being overweight and then turn around and date an overweight white woman"

    You can't blame being overweight on a black man. It reads almost as if you are coming to the dating game with a percieved disadvantage. If you're weight is apart of this perception you can do something about it. I am also a believer that what you expect to show up WILL and DOES. There are black men out there who keep their promise, who are faithful, who will love us and ONLY us. But first you have to believe it and KNOW YOU ARE WORTHY OF IT. and you can't bring perceptions of handicaps to the table to make excuses for lousy black men.

    If your weight is an issue to you. Do something about it. Don't use it as ONE particular black man does here with statistics. I also believe that body image is in the eyes of the beholder. Monique has ALOT of self love. And she;s a bad mammajamma and thusly makes me and MOST MEN (including her husband) believe it too. So if your weight is an issue. Work on that. Don't scapegoat the black man about it.

  40. Never allow someone to be your priority, while allowing yourself to be their option. My thoughts.


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