When I am going to the airport I check the status of my flight to see if its been delayed. If I order a pizza and its been too long, I’ll call up the store and check the status of my delivery. If I am waiting at a restaurant and I want to know when my food is coming, I’ll go ahead and ask for a status update. If I’m in my car, instead of just waiting for it to run out of gas, I’ll check the status on the fuel gauge. I’m pretty sure we all have a million things we check the status on during the day … but there seems to be just one area where too many get nervous and all b****h made.
You know where I’m going with this …
Their Relationship Status
Yes, countless stories come my way of people afraid to find out where they stand with the person they have been going out with, spending time with, and bending over backwards with a feather in their mouth while their partner wears a cape warms up the maple syrup probably sleeping with.
In most of these situations, you usually have two positions that everyone can be characterized into.
If it ain’t broken … don’t try and fix it
This person is enjoying these escapades and the time being spent. There is a good chance they have other people and they aren’t trying to move things forward … they got as much as they need. Either their not just that into you, or they want to sleep around some more, or they just don’t believe in labels … whatever the reason … they’re not going to use the dreaded “r-word” (relationship) unless their sex\phone time\free meals\spooning is threatened.
Everything’s running fine … but could be running better
This is person wants to know where they stand and what their standing on. They probably want things to move forward and just don’t believe in staying stagnant. While the P or V is good … they probably want something more. Dating leads to relationships, and casual dating is just something people who are afraid of commitment say (according to them). This “situation” had better be moving towards something good!
I am going to state this now so there is no confusion for anyone … It’s the second person’s responsibility to ask “Where do we stand?”!
I hate to put females on the spot (I’m lying … I love doing it), but this is usually a female problem. They find themselves wanting to turn this FwB or casual dating situation into something serious, but they refuse to ask. They feel its not their place, the other person should be jumping hurdles in order to lock them down, and that they need to be fought for. *sigh* …
The fact of the matter is, if the other person is happy and knows that they don’t need to do anymore to keep their current situation … why are they? Do you walk into McDonald’s, see that a Big Mac is $2, and then just voluntarily give another $5 just for the hell of it? No … you are going to give what they say they want (or imply) in order for you to get what you want … the meat and some special sauce (pause). And while I hear women often in the second role, it can just as easily be a guy (read: a sucka). Point is if you want it … its up to you to make it happen.
So, good people of SBM.net, my friends, my family … what do you think? Does the “typ 1” person have a responsibilty to realize that their partner wants more and offer it (or tell them it will never happen)? Should this artificial fear of the “status check” be discarded away like spinning rims and the jheri curl? What about you? You scurrred?