Complacency sucks no matter what area of life we’re talking about. Complacency on the job gets you fired. Complacency on a sports team gets you benched. Complacency in school can cost you an internship or admission to an elite program. Complacency in a relationship gets you dumped or cheated on. There’s a difference between being content and being complacent. Someone can be content with where they are in their life, but still give their best with everything that they do even if they don’t aspire to reach another level. Someone that’s complacent will typically start slackin’ and fall into the trap of thinking they’re all set. They don’t keep themselves sharp, and they ultimately end up in an undesirable situation wondering how they got there.
Being that this site primarily deals with relationships and associated dynamics, let’s talk about complacency in that context. This post was inspired by a conversation with a fellow blogger and friend of mine, Seattle Washington. I don’t remember specifically how we got on the topic, but more than likely we saw some dude with some girl he’d been dating for a while and noticed that she had “let herself go”. This probably spurred the discussion of multiple women from college and beyond where the woman looked one way when she was single, and then just completely fell off once she got into a relationship. And when I talk about someone falling off, I’m talkin’ about stuff that the person has control of. Getting in a car accident and having a visible scar on the face or a diagnosable condition does not count as falling off. Being 130 lbs. and single and sexy then getting into a relationship and floating up to 160 (without a medical excuse) could be considered falling off.
But Slim, you act like men don’t be fallin’ off and shit!
No. Society acts like men don’t be fallin’ off when they get into a relationship. Seriously though, how often do you hear about dudes looking their best and then gettin’ into a relationship and fallin’ off physically? I can’t imagine a man bein’ like “Well, I’m good. I got me a boobear so eff the gym. Pass me a beer and some fried chicken for the rest of my life. F*ck cardio!” I’m not saying this is what women say, but the stories of chicks gettin’ booboo’ed up then becoming less aesthetically pleasing are endless. As critical as women are of each other, I’m sure every one of you beautiful folks (Not to be confused with “you people”) that read this blog can name at least 2 chicks who you think fell off since gettin’ a man and you’re about to steal that man.
But being the open-minded sex machine guy that I am, I will concede that men do have the ability to fall off. When we get complacent, we fall off in our gestures and/or behavior. Maybe we stop saying the nice things we used to say because we just think it’s understood and doesn’t need to be said anymore. Maybe we start “forgetting” the significance of certain events and places. Maybe we act oblivious to your blatant signs of horniness and go to sleep instead because we expect the goodness to be there tomorrow. Gettin physically sloppy and becoming uncouth just cuz we got a girl? Ehh, not so much. Regardless of which side of the table you’re sittin’ on, “falling off” will leave you and your relationship vulnerable. If you don’t believe that, then you’ve probably already fallen off and you’re being cheated on as you read this post…though I really hope that’s not the case.
So what does “falling off” mean to you? Do the women actually know men who just became physically unappealing after getting into a relationship? Got additions for my examples of falling off? Have you fallen off and you’re trying to get back on track? Let’s question, comment, and be concerned!
You’ll Never Catch Me Slippin’ Unless It’s Icy Outside,