Suck it or not


Familiar with Lex Steele?  I’m his East Coast counterpart.  When he can’t make it to the Right Coast, I represent him at  glad handing events, award ceremonies, and I have even had to do a few cameos.  Ever thought “that doesnt look like Lex…”  That was yours truly.  If I’m not reppin Lex or wasting taxpayer’s money at work, you can occasionally catch me over at (Shout out to Ms. Jenkins, Slim and Young Seattle!)

As a former manager at a Marriott hotel, I definitely understand ladebelle’s concept of hiring employees to fill specific positions.  However, just like when I was a manager at a hotel, you usually get employees that show up to work and the first thing out their mouth is “what they aint about to do”.  Which is cool, no problem establishing your boundaries and what not.   But guess what, you are an EMPLOYEE. Management dictates the work on this site, patna. If you want to keep this job, you better get with the program.

In my experience, the biggest point of contention between employees and management  usually arises when the issue of fellatio is brought to the table.  Now as a manager and representative of a very reputable organization, I  have a responsibility to make certain concessions to make sure my employees are happy with their working situation.  I have no problem reciprocating.  What I will not tolerate is the dreaded ultimatum: “I only do that for my man.”  Now, I’ve held focus groups to try and understand what could possibly lead a woman to say something so ludicris to a man.  The most popular responses were “Well, I have to trust him” and “I don’t just do that with anybody.”  This alarming for several reasons.  First off, while you might not do that with just anybody, you are seeking employment here and I hate to be thought of as “just anybody.”  I already have to worry about people misrepresenting themselves on their resume, now you get to work and refuse to display your talent?  Not good.  You are clearly not a team player and not the type of employee we are looking for.

As for this trust excuse…let’s be realistic for a second.  I’m not advocating that you fall on your knees and begin worshipping at the temple of RightCoastLexSteele (It would be nice, though) on first sight.  However, if we have been “talking” for a while, I’ve been to your place, you’ve been to mine, we hung out a few times, and I’ve introduced you to my fellow cocksmen, how much more trust you want to have before you bless me?  I know, I know, diseases and blah blah blah, but guess what, condoms break everyday in the hood shorty, so you can still be exposed.  Might as well die happy with a stiff one in or around your mouth.  While this may not guarantee you a job depending on your skill level, it will definitely guarantee you won’t get fired.  And there is definitely a shortage of SBM’s hiring during this recession, so you might as well do everything you can to hold on to your job.  If not,  you will be downsized in favor of someone who will do twice the work, for half the price and quadruple the enthusiam.  Gotta love capitalism.  It just seems absurd for you to kiss me in the mouth, arguably one of the most germ filled places on the human body, get butt neked in my domicile, use my bathroom/shower,  but can’t kiss my shamrock, which has been in it’s Banana Republic cotton case all day.  Maybe I’m the crazy one, but that just seems like flawed logic.

See Also:  What's Behind Twitter's Obsession With Eating "Cake"?

This is not a rant about women that don’t spit on the mic.  I’ve totally blocked them out of my consciousness.  They don’t exist to me.  Stephen Colbert doesn’t see race, and I don’t see women that don’t lick me like a lollipop.  This is strictly about the “conditional” mouth huggers.  To all the “Ms. If you were my man” people out there, please, get over it.  IF my aunt had balls, she’d be my uncle.  But she doesn’t, so we call her auntie.  No idea what that has to do w/ anything, but I said it.  Look ma, I haven’t been huggin’ the block, nor have I been hustlin’ rocks, but I’ma still need to know baby girl, is you gon suck it or not?! (It wont suck itself.)


  1. "In my experience, the biggest point of contention between employees and management usually arises when the issue of fellatio is brought to the table."

    Huh? Initially I thought, "My God, is that what you have to do to get a job these days?" LOL.

    Why do you think the man is necessarily 'management'?

  2. @drea those women are the worst. lol. thats like the employee who shows up late, slacks on their work and yest still requests a pay raise.

    i've never understood the logic myself rightcoast but i guess thats the world we live in and one of those things we'll never understand.

  3. What is this…misogynist city?! I'm with Ms. Hall: Management? Really?! I'm sorry, boo, but I am not your employee, and you will certainly never be considered management. ::whew:: Now to the task at hand…

    No, you are not getting fellatio if you are still merely in the interviewing process. Would you ever get a bonus before being hired? I'm all for reciprocating the goodness, but as I said on 3ways yesterday, I don't expect (nor would I allow) facington from someone with whom I have yet to establish a relationship/intimacy, etc., so don't expect it from me. If that's a problem, you needst applieth elsewhere.

  4. She won't get hired if she can't do a mic check. If I decide to let her in the studio, she'll be good for nothing but backstage action in between sets, dig?

  5. I am proudly raising my hand and proclaiming I am that girl! However I do not ask to be licked either before it's serious (i.e. monogamous relationship). I feel that a guy should respect my wishes and trust that it will be well worth the wait when were committed. I do love blessing the mic, but I'm not going to do it FOR JUST ANYBODY, because if I do it I'm not spitting. And I only take it down for my man, period.

  6. @Reign: "I do love blessing the mic, but I’m not going to do it FOR JUST ANYBODY, because if I do it I’m not spitting."

    If you're the full-time employee, this would get you a quarterly bonus, promotion, and annual 10-15% raise. Gotta make sure no recruiters can lure you away to a different

  7. Agrees with Reign…and as a man if you cannot understand or get with that then you're not the man I should be checking for anyway. Lata Potata.

  8. "They call me this misogynist…but they don't call me the dude that give gifts in the project"

    No misogyny intended, ladies. I consider myself management because well…I have management experience…and, in my opinion for as long as I can remember, men have been conditioned to think that they are seeking a prize as opposed to them being a prize that is sought after and highly desired. So f*ck that, I'm owing this sh*t and flipping the script. So if you want to work here and someday receive a promotion, we need to have a fundemental understanding from the start. I have problem hooking you up, so come on with it!

  9. I must profess my utter hatred for these females (eyeing Nyela & Reign). I mean … I can understand you not wanting to suck any and everything put near your mouth, but if we're dating, and chilling, and cutting … then why must I remain dry down there?

    And in response to the "misogynistic" comments … if you look at Ladebelle's original post, management is simply "you". It could be a woman talking about potential suitors, or a dude talking about potential buns.

  10. I'm not a rules lady

    I dont have rules for this and rules for that

    I want to be respected, i want honesty and hopefully monogamy

    I have been married and in several relationships so I have experience in being married and all that jazz, so i'm not on a "I need to add marriage to my list of accomplishments" clock

    I bless you when the time feels right and when it is right, likewise I feel dude should do

    Life is too short for me personally to have limits and expectations and this and that

    I agree with the poster, if we been kicking it for some time, and I still dont want to bless the mic, then I probably never intend to


    Besides, you can SAY you my man just to get your mic blessed anyway but still have other chicks

  11. My vote for Management: VOTE DOWN, BOOOOO! Dude, I'm sorry, but you totally just brushed off what should be the primary concern of slurping the serpent: disease! You say condoms break, and yeah they do, but not often enough to just say "to hell with it" otherwise we wouldn't use them in the first place. Too much stuff can get all up and through the system from the male's juices. I'm all for reserving it only for my man, mostly because it's with your man you're most likely to get tested and make sure everything is clean before you do the do raw. I'm sorry, motto: Don't suggest it until we're tested. And I wouldn't ask him to pleasure me either until the test. Be real, we're living in a world where one act can be a death sentence. If you don't have respect for that truth, you're living in the clouds and in a danger zone.

  12. Dome is a cool step, but I don't stress it because I'm not giving chicks Sweet Tongue Music early either!

    After dating for a while it eventually will come to a head (pause/no pun), so if you arent a fellaciatic woman, then state that from jump, then refer to the "They still make you" post on SBM, lololol

    There's alot of prudes on this site…lmao!

  13. LOL

    here is a secret about women

    most women aren't d*ck suckers…they will lead you to BELIEVE that they are so they can get that promise that you will be with them forever and ever.

    Trust a woman who is really into won't wait 6 months into the relationship to give it to you on your bday (I know dudes who be mad as spit when they wait that long and its wack…DUH its wack cause she dont really give head)

    Just like men will say they your man to get it, women will say they will give it when you their man

    its like a bargaining chip/tool

    I say eff all that. Be honest and do you (as long as you being safe )!!

    just my opinion by the way

  14. @ DukeTexMix,

    Yes, I get it. That makes perfect sense. Because apparently once a dude gets wifed up, there's a 0% chance he'll cheat on you and still expose you.

    I'm not naive to the realities of life, but you can also walk out your front door and get hit by a stray bullet…but I bet you still go to work faithfully everyday…

  15. lmao right coast has done it again. Umm ok when it comes to spitting my lyrics I have to feel like our dating can lead to a relationship. If we've been kicking it for a while and i've met some of his posse and am still around things may be heating up. And as such its ok to show your lyrical skills. But only if you feel compelled to do so. Spit your lyrics when you feel like it.

  16. It's rarely on the to-do list (#4 give Lex a BJ today) and it's not one of my all-time favorite things to do. So, in a job context, I wouldn't see this as falling within the parameters of my ordinary duties. I see this as a promotion with overtime pay, lol.

  17. @ true

    Trust Ive gotten wack brain… it was like watching a bad movie… "when will it be over"

    I let chicks know up front im nto goin down anytime soon, so if you roc the mic, dont be mad if i dont apear on your album to bless you with my cunnilyrics

  18. I'm all for it, you just gotta do me 1st. This is how it goes:
    Our first sexual encounter, no oral.
    Second: You do me.
    Third: You do me, I do you.
    After that, alls fair in love & war!

  19. 22. 100%Redbone
    April 17, 2009 at 1:48 pm

    I’m all for it, you just gotta do me 1st. This is how it goes:
    Our first sexual encounter, no oral.
    Second: You do me.
    Third: You do me, I do you.
    After that, alls fair in love & war!


    no-sign. ladies first, chivalry is alive! lmao

  20. @ SBM: You fail to understand that even if we're just dating and/or chilling, you're not getting anything. NADA. When the foundation is laid and we have come to an agreement that your d*ck is mine and my p*ssy is yours, and we are not cutting with anyone else, then by all means have at it. Until then manually bless it yourself.

    Now I don't have a 90 day rule or anything but just like your D has a degree requirement, my mouth, my p*ssy and every other part of me has a commitment requirement and much more.

    Do all the guys here think the same? That all women should slob the nob as a prerequisite? Wait till you all have a lil girl then you'll think differently.

    That is all. I need to get back to being an unproductive worker and finish my movie.

  21. Not tryin to spark up somethin or deal in stereotypes, but I just don't think black women do this. It's as simple as that.

    Now, I understand that some BW's do this. Bless all of you. Unfortunately many of you do not. We need to work on those women.

  22. the ones that DONT do it are the ones that are married more

    men think because they DONT do it that means they are good girls, not promiscuous etc

    it means that THEY DONT DO IT


    The irony

    the ones that do it get a bad rap (and stay single cause of it) of course we are reluctant to do it

  23. @ Stank-O: No I think the difference is that white women do it to whomever… they guy they just met at a bar, the dude that sits behind them in Micro-Economics, their boss. Black women give head, we just have our conditions… as this post so eloquently stated.

  24. You can call me a freak if you like, but I don't mine blessin the mic! Yes sir! It's a straight turn on! After I speak I get the the best cut ever!! But of course I just don't put these juicy browns on any dude. If we cutty buddies fosho I give it to you! No prob! And I don't expect you to go down. I'm cool with that, BUT after I give it to ya, you just might chnage your mind!

  25. @ True: It's a little funny but, white women are in a rush to be married, so whatever gets them there I guess. Even the virgin ones will bless the mic… I know, my homie married one. And they're not all happily married either.

    What's so wrong with building up the sexual desire… makes me want to ravish a dude even more when we make it official.

  26. Whatever your preference is fine, after all this is America. I just dont think women should use head as their trump card. What if you suck at it and no one has bothered to tell you (or you havent done it enough to get a good critique) or what if you're not as good as his ex, who not only sucked it, she licked him in some other strange places, swallowed, brought that ish back up, spit it on the wall and drew a picture in it? I been saying this for years…p*ssy needs new tricks…

  27. Daaang, how did I let office drama distract me from this little post?? Anywho…

    Don't be mad, Lex. Some ladies just aren't that into it. Some ladies are into it but are afraid to do it too soon because they don't want guys thinking they're freaks. Maybe she just wolfed down an entire box of Cracker Jacks and her jaws are tired. Maybe she didn't like the fact that started nudging her shoulders down as soon as she gave you a kiss on your chest. Maybe she was about to before you asked, now she's feeling stubborn. Maybe your spunk tastes funny. Pineapple and junk food will flavor you up right. Maybe your LexSteele is so big girls don't want to choke on it (sidenote: this was the thought that crossed my head the first time I was ever with a guy known to my friends as Big D**k Leon. No known relation to LexSteele).

    My point is, there are plenty of reasons – and a grown azz woman who is stingy with head is probably not the main one! If a person (man or woman) needs to control you with sex or sexual favors you just need to run. Otherwise, you may be standing with your mic out and the song just isn't about you, lol.

  28. New commenter/semi-new reader but had to join the convo. If she says she only does that for her man (which I've said and isn't always true, fyi), it may mean she's not really interested in YOU as a full-time employee. Hanging out, sex, having a good time – fine. But all that effort for someone I'm not trying to boo? Fuggetaboutit.
    Obviously not true for all chicks but something to think about.

  29. Interesting comments. I'm sorry but good head is a requirement if you are going to move up the food chain with me. If I am going to be committed, I need to make sure that what I am getting at home keeps me happy. If you do not give great head and ENJOY it, then you're probably not keeping me happy and it probably will not go there.

  30. Well whats interesting is in life, there are so many groups that would seem to fit perfectly "peanut butter and jelly" "ham and cheese" and so on and so on, but they never mix in real life ie; good guys and good girls… I find this amusing b/c i represent a BEAUTIFUL group of beauties who actually LOVE giving head.. im serious! Tall, some short, but healthy, sexy, confident, swagg is strong, careers, etc. We have our chats and our meetings.. sometimes just to do a monthly check to see who has fulfilled their monthly quota. Our problem: we cant find the MAN that can even come close to how we put it down. We got the few small % of men that can lick a girl so good, it would make her want to slap her momma, but most of us have the same complaint: he scared to eat, dont know how to eat, aint hungy enough, too busy slobberin' in it… LOL the whole 9!! Sooo too bad our 2 circles need to mix!

  31. Only 17% of American woman enjoy sucking dick … compare that to 80% of Austrian woman … so hey answer is simple.

    As a free agent, my agent tells me never sign with a team, that can't guarantee you benefits with you're contract.

    Like Katt Williams say "You don't got to suck dick, but it don't look good on your resume"


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