***** Admin Note *****
Because we really love you all and listen to you … here is another post based off of a skribit suggestion. Keep suggestiong topic using the little tool on the site … we do listen.
Also … the survey is done with. Thanks to everyone who completed the survey … and expect changes to come soon.
– SBM … aka … The Management
To my ladies …
You’re walking down the street, heading from work to your local favorite happy hour. You’re looking good because this morning you knew you were heading out looking for a new man after work, with you little power suit, that now has been adjusted to show a little post work cleavage. As you walk down the sidewalk … you hear that familiar phrase …
“Excuse me miss … can I get some conversation?”
You roll your eyes, turn around smiling because you don’t need to be called a stuck up b*tch this early in the night, and politely say … “I’m in a rush. I’m meeting some friends”.
“Well can I meet your friends too?”
*sigh* … this isn’t going to be simple. “No, we are going to a spot with my boyfriend (a lie), and I don’t want to surprise them with anyone”
“Why don’t you just slow down a little … and I’ll just talk to you while you walk. You can tell me about your boyfriend.”
Yes … even as a guy who accepts and demands the right to “holla” at any woman at anytime, luckily (for women) I can take a hint and am not going to harass someone who is not interested … I got better ways to spend my time. But, sadly every guy isn’t like me, and some are just relentless. And as someone who has been harassed by drunk, forward and fugly women at the club … I feel your pain. So, for all the women out there (cause I love ya’ll), here is …
SBM’s List of ways to get him to leave you alone
Tell him it’s your boyfriends birthday … and he’s in the club/restaurant/bar with you
Saying you have a boyfriend is the first thing women learn in “How to Duck a n***a 101”, but even a nice guy like me (I’m so considerate … really) won’t take that mess half of the time … because your probably lying. It was one of my good female friends who expanded on the classic. If it’s his birthday, and he is on the other side of the club … well … even I’m gonna give up. Just make sure he doesn’t catch you giving out your number later … women are getting called a stupid b*tch out now.
The Super Silent Treatment
As a guy, you need some sort of response. You need some small sliver of hope that your words are gonna end in some draws and backshots a number and a date. If we get nothing but silence and a mean mug … even the hardest of pursuers is going to have to give up. And for this to work, no smiling, no talking ot your girls, no nothing!!! *Warning* … There is a high probability you will get cursed out as a result.
Here … let me get your number
Women take numbers from guys all the time … every day … all day. How many women actually call the numbers that they take … 10%. We know what is happening, but like I said … all we need is a sliver of hope. She has the number … and if she does call … we know your down to ride you upside down in a seedy hotel room interested. But … be careful … don’t give him your phone to put in the number … we’re smart. All we gotta do is call our phone from her’s … and boom … got the number.
Ask for a drink … and some food … and a necklace … and some shoes … and …
We all know that simps exist … and they’re out there f*cking up the game for all of us good Cocksmen … but 75% guys are going to be turned off ASAP. The key … you need several hundred dollars from this guy and you just met him. Again … delivery is what sells it. No smiles, no laughing, no giggles, and detailed serious demands. “I know you just met me, but you need to buy me and my girls a bottle of patron platinum (club retail price of $1000) if your serious. I don’t drink anything less!”
Spit in his face
Sure there is a 50% chance that you’ll get punched in the throat by a guy if he’s willing to ht a woman (80% chance your gonna get spit back at, a drink thrown in your face, or possibly cut) … but I bet he’s not gonna try and get in your pants anymore.
Talk about how hard life as a woman is since the surgery
If this doesn’t get him to run away … well … you might as well just go ahead and marry him because there is no person on this earth more dedicated to you than this stranger here … or he’s just gay.
As always … practice makes perfect. Go out to your local street corner and practice these techniques on the teenagers posted up on the street. Once you can deter them without getting called a b*tch or having something thrown at you … your ready to take your newfound skills out into the world and happily make it down the street.
I’m not a woman, so I know I missed a couple. Got any more to add? Which ones are the most effective? Guys, what things will get you to stop … if anything?