SBM: “Dawg, did you get 22″ rims on your car?”
Jerome D: “Yeah son, I had to stunt on em.”
SBM: “Stunt on who?”
JD: “You know son … the haters!”
SBM: *loud sigh* “What haters? Who is hating on you?”
JD: “You know, the people who don’t wanna see me riding clean”
SBM: “You got a used beemer that is costing you a grip and …”
JD: “So?”
SBM: “and … n****a … you live at home with your mom!”
JD: “I mean … she don’t bother me and its just for now.”
SBM: “Your 31 and your car payments match my rent!”
JD: “I’m saying though, I could move out … but I wouldn’t be riding clean.”
SBM: “Damn you BET!!!!!”
I can’t stand the hood rich.
I mean … I detest these negoes. Women are bad … but the make version is so much worst. are like a plague.
And as much as I hate to admit this … as much as it hurts me to say this … it’s almost entirely a black thing
I love my people. I really really love all of us, the strength we exhibit, and our unique way of doing things … but if I catch one more motherf*cker who is riding around in a car nicer than mine and paying for his grocery with food stamps … I’m personally leading the charge on BET and single handidly snatching T-pain and Soulja Boy’s chains … and making a $500,000 donation to Teach for America.
So, today I’m going to take SBM.net away from the usual woman bashing witty relationship advice, and issue a public service announcement to you … you … you n*****s!
Before I end up going into a rant that get’s me blocked at more work sites and has BET sending trained assassin’s to my resident and Aaron McGruder (think Boondocks) … let me share with you all the:
Top 5 #Fails of flossing/stunting/blinging ass negroes!
You don’t own sh*t
Credit card is maxed out. Rent to your mom’s is past due. You think a mutual fund is when you and your man’s both pay for a shared set of Gucci shades. The bank actually owns everything you ride around in, wear, and claim is yours. When it comes to amassing some actual assets … #FAIL.
You aspire to … stunt harder … that’s it
Who needs an education, career, or assest … you got some 22s … and them b*tches stay clean. You have no long term goals in life, except to look flyer than the guy next to you. Funny thing is, that guy riding around in his Camry has a 401K, two Master’s, and an earning potential that will leave not only his kids rich, but their kids. When he does buy that Benz, straight cash my friend. Real aspirations in life … #FAIL
You refuse to buy used, live with other people, eat at Ruby Tuesday’s, save, ….
When it comes to what you won’t do … the list is pages long. It’s funny how every single thing you refuse to do would save you money. Sadly, the one thing I have noticed between a lot of 2520s straight out of college and a large population of us … is that they will sacrifice now, to be better in the end. I first noticed this when I was looking to buy an Audi, and my co-workers gave me this weird look. Who knew their recommendations to buy stocks would have been a better look in the end? When it comes to taking it a little easy today … so you can go so much harder tomorrow … #FAIL
Investing … what’s that?
Rims don’t appreciate … sorry. That 6 series … it’s not gonna go up in value. You refuse to read a book on finances. Stocks are a “hustle”. A broker is for “rich white folk”. WTF? When it comes to people who have no idea that you are supposed to take some of your money … every month … and make it grow … #FAIL
Jay is on BET with a new Maserati … Lets go to the dealer
It just hit me. BET is a joint project by diamond makers, luxury car makers, clothing lines, and rent-a-rim shops in order to sap every last dollar out of the black community. They all got together, figured out the best marketing strategy is to make up a bunch of words to make spending money cool, mysogyny the “hot” thing, and “booty butt cheeks” an everlasting staple in the black community. To you … the secret conglomerate … #SUCCESS. To the longevity of our people … #FAIL
Barack … save us
Now, don’t get me wrong. There are a lot of people with nice things, taking care of home first and making sure they avoid these ills. There are plenty of people with legitimate money, with legitimate nice things, and know what the f*ck they’re doing. But … that’s not who I’m talking about.
We all know who this is aimed at. I was him for a short period (I’m human), you might have gone through the same thing, and you probably have at least 3 friends who need to hit that stunnaholics anonymous meeting.
Did I go a little too hard? Am I just some uppity negro talking out my ass? Or … are you fed up with this too and ready to grab them torches, and take down BET and every rent-a-rim, payday loan, and ez credit place along the way?
– SBM aka Mr. Waking ninjas up
I totally agree. Like Will Smith said "Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like".
True Story – sitting in Starbuck's Sunday getting my latte on when brother rolls up. Whatcha reading? I show him – it's the stock market page. He frowns, "Oh you one of them uppity intellectual chicks." And walks off. He buys a drink and a muffin, swipes his ATM card and is declined for the $6.22 sale. He scrounges up five one dollar bills to pay for the drink, tells them to keep the muffin and stomps out to get in his bling-blingiddy Escalade. Backs away with rims spinning ya'll! SMH
LMAO… Idiot.
OMG
Oh say this mess ins't so! Where was America's Funniest Videos when this happened!! That's a life fail!
I wrote a post like this:
http://singlesisterspeak.wordpress.com/2009/08/02…
And he!! no you didn't go too hard. lol. I agree with everything u said.
Chuuuch, family. I fully co-sign with Nicki on this, Hell naw you didn't go to hard.
@ OneChele: Wow, what a f$#kin moron.
"Did I go a little too hard? Am I just some uppity negro talking out my ass?" HELL NAW you didn't go to hard!! Do you see how hard BET and every other blitz that has been created to undermine success and digress Black folk?
"When you control a man's thinking you do not have to worry about his actions. You do not have to tell him not to stand here or go yonder. He will find his 'proper place' and will stay in it. You do not need to send him to the back door. He will go without being told. In fact, if there is no back door, he will cut one for his special benefit. His education makes it necessary."—Dr. Carter G. Woodson
Great post….
i might be the only black male that i know that detests rims. i never really saw the point of them. whenever i see someone riding on anything that's larger than 22's all i can think about is chris rock "they spinning n*gga, they spinning!". i'm so glad that most of my friends don't think or behave in this manner. i don't think thats a coincidence either.
i also hate that phrase, "I'm killing em".
I actually was trying to fit that Chris Rock quote in the post, but it didn't make it. I was thinking about it the whole time I was writing.
And don't get me started on negroes "killin em" …
its a couple of dudes i go to school with now that have that mentality. but they are trust fund babies. they stay trying to "kill em". i just look at them and shake my head. dude don't nobody care. lol
I too, loathe the hood rich. and I also can't stand people always saying they have haters. most people that think they have haters…do not! ugh it annoys me to no end when folks feel the need to "flex" on their invisible haters, or make them their "motivators" I blame T.I. na boo, you need to motivate yourself. and getting a fly whip is not the goal that should be sought after.
No, you didn't go too hard. Trying to be flashy (this is what we called it before it was blingin') has done Black folks in for a while. I agree with your points and will add a few more, mostly from my own files of youthful indiscretion:
1. Don't get a credit card in college. For any reason.
2. When you leave college, move back in with your parents. Work out one of those "mom specials" on the price, and then pay them as close to market rate as you can. Have your folks store the difference in an account for you down the line. A year or 2 of this can be the down payment on your house.
3. Everyone can't stay with mom and dad. If not, find some roommates. Preferably more than one.
4. Get acquainted early with items that will grow in value(home, investments, certain jewelry) versus items that will decrease in value (everything that constitutes bling). Anytime you think of putting yourself in a position to pay off something for years, make sure you're making a real investment.
5. Pay sh*t on time. If I had every dollar I've paid in late fees, interest hikes, etc. I would be a very rich woman.
6. Liquor, clubbing, weed, ciggies, club clothes and all other vices cost money. Keep track of how much you spend in a month.
7. Pay yourself.
8. Don't mess with the MVA. Especially on insurance compliance.
9. Guard your credit with your life. Even when you don't have any.
I could go on – mostly because I took a lot of stupid financial hits in my 20's, lol.
Preach!
This is some solid advice that most peopple will completely ignore. I will say that I had a CC in college, but I barely used it and paid it of in full every month. It left me with good ass credit after graduation.
You are a better spender than me! CC in college led to the premature downfall of a lot of people's credit. :shudders:
LMAO. The key is to be a self admitted cheap ass, which I am. Doesn't matter if its cash, credit, or glass beads, I'm trying to spend as little as possible on whatever I am doing!
SBM: ”
BET sending trained assassin’s to my resident and Aaron McGruder (think Boondocks)”Yep. BET should be sending Big N!gga and Crazy B!tch to ambush you outside your house any day now.
SBM: ”You refuse to read a book on finances.”
Peter Schiff’s Little Book of Bull Moves in Bear Markets is an excellent one I just read.
OneChele: ”He buys a drink and a muffin, swipes his ATM card and is declined for the $6.22 sale. He scrounges up five one dollar bills to pay for the drink, tells them to keep the muffin and stomps out to get in his bling-blingiddy Escalade.”
You should have laughed and pointed until his car left the lot. Or maybe he could have traded one of his rims for a muffin.
”Young enough to know the right car to buy
Yet grown enough not to put rims on it!”
I co-sign laughing and pointing at that silly dude. Childish? Yes. But worth it, lol.
You should have gone harder.
1. Everyone should have enough money saved up to last them a YEAR!!!!! This means when you get that fancy job, don't run out and buy a new fancy car.
2. Live below your means. This is how you accomplish #1.
3. Go to a professional tax person, financial planner, and get a will.
4. After college, get a roommate–or two.
5. Find friends who discourage bling.
6. Eat and drink a home.
7. Discounts are your friend.
Big fan of eating and drinking at home and one reason I love having a girlfriend. She will actually chill with me, crush some malt liquor, watch a downloaded movie, and this is a date.
LOL…dude, I had pizza, wings and four shots of courvoisier w/ mrs. steele yesterday before entering the rampin shop. Felt like heaven.
yep. being in a relationship is a good look. LOL. and I can cook too! its on. long as you work off those good calories from the good food and good liquor.
Aw man…Thanks for this post….I was hoping somebody tell these negroes something…I live in Miami and it is nearly impossible to meet a real black man who is not "frontin on what he got".
Dudes are renting rims, cars and pretending they are someone they're not. Even when you meet someone you might be slightly attracted to, he pulls up in a ridiculously expensive car with rims so big that he has like an inch of tire left…It's obvious he is living ghetto fabulous because he has never mentioned career aspirations, a college experience or a day at work since the day you met him….
Then there goes all the lies….Lies to cover up their fake ass persona and appearance….Lies lies lies…UGH!!! SAVE THEM ALL!
: Starts the slow clap : I've been telling people that since my first year in college. What's the point of Spring Break in Costa Rica if you can't eat the rest of the semester or buy your books for class.
Now that I've graduated I've seen it worse. An acquaintance of mine took her first three paycheck and bought Gucci and Chanel purses without paying her rent and is on the verge of being evicted. But she has the nerve to tell me my purse are not hot. Well never is being homeless but I guess you'll find out in a little bit huh?
Yea B…you're an uppity ass negro. And as communications director of the uppity ass negroes club, I'd like to welcome you!
You aint going hard kid, you just preaching the truth. Although, I must point out, if you look at some the folks in our generation that spend like this, it's actually because they got it from their folks. Instead of passing on wealth to us, some of our folks passed on bad spending habits. It just so happens that we have entered the era of bling. I have countless friends who tell me their folks have told something to the effect of "might as well spend the money on you while I'm alive". I actually had my pops check me a few weeks ago for being frugal, or as he calls it, cheap. My mother stay watchin QVC and HSN like she's a damn addict. Matter of fact, she told me the other day that "shopping is my hobby" at which point I had to check her and tell her that may be a hobby for someone like Paris Hilton, but for someone in her tax bracket, there's no reason Macy's and JcPenney has first dibs on your social security check.
@ Ms. Smart
Marshall's, DSW and TJ Maxx are your friends too!
@ Anna N.
Liquor, weed and cigs are in my budget under THERAPY
Mmmhmmm, I feel you on some smoke-filled therapy with a chaser of Patron, lol. But when I finally calculated how much I was spending….Yikes!!! I almost slapped myself! I had a lethal combination: Good weed in abundance + top shelf liquor + ciggies.
Yea I been cuttin all kinds of corners to make the therapy ends meet…buying in bulk from my pharmacist, saving clips, blazing for dolo…which may seem nuts, but when you don't have an extra lung breathing in your good canibus while not throwing in 5, you can stretch that L out…unless it's trash then you gotta blaze two bags to feel something. The next step is to have my good southern friends send me cartons because apparently cigarettes are cheaper than water in the south and they are just murder here in NY.
CHUUUUCH on this post! Im glad a lot of my people have awaken, but its time for all of us to WAKE UP!
I definitely have the save mentality. I worked in the collections business so I know the effects of bad credit. I worked to get my credit rating to that of my 2520 constituents, lol. I can also say that at one time I've been hood rich, and to an extent we all indulge:
"But I ain't even gon' act holier than thou
'Cause fuck it, I went to Jacob with 25 thou
Before I had a house and I'd do it again
'Cause I wanna be on 106 and Park pushing a Benz
I wanna act ballerific like it's all terrific
I got a couple past due bills, I won't get specific
I got a problem with spending before I get it
We all self conscious, I'm just the first to admit it" – Kanye West
Finally, you should have a CC in college, but only if you have a job or someone who can pay that bill. Thats the easiest way to travel down the road to perdition
my parents paid my cc bills in college. enablers. I graduated and they handed the statements back like "your turn". LOL. I definitely didn't get good money managing habits at home, but I learned by reading books and wanting to improve the quality of my life. I hate when people try to count my money–I like nice stuff and therefore I do buy it, but I shop on debit. no more running up credit cards for me!
I'm mad you wrote this on my pay day. I'm at my job right now listening to Plenty Money – Plies. "Let the Streetz know…" he listen to it too. I do some ignent things with my money now, but that's after I went straight cash like Randy Moss over a year ago. And this fall, I got a college loan and a car note coming off the books in the Spring. I'm gonna act a donkey.
I don't know if anyone brought this up, but while i'm on the subject, and Nicki can attest that i'm qualified to say this because i'm not cheap. Would you ignent negros please stop spending all this money on these women? DO NOT TAKE THEM TO THE STORE AND HAVE THEM THROWING ISH IN THE BAG? (Besides, if you gonna drop $3K on a chick, throw some D's on that bicth.) I'm tired of hearing about couples where the dude is in debt and the chick is sitting on a nice savings account. You spunt your whole paycheck on that chick, and she ain't giving you nothing but some sideways poontang 3 times a week. That's dumb.
PS – I'm still drunk, in a way. And this white chick at my job can get it. I bet her family is loaded. And that my nigras is how you get to rich quick. #berealfridays
I can of course co-sign that there should be no line item for simping. Its in excusable, and if you are a self admitted SAN (simpin ass negro) … kill yourself.
Everytime this subject even come up, reminds me of the boughiest girl I ever dated and the ridiculous demands she triend to exact on me. The sad part is, the is proly some soft ass negro taking her on trips and buying her moet. *sigh*
Naw, SBM, you didn't go too hard. I think the problem is that we all need to go HARDER on each other. Our mentality regarding finances as a people is so arse-backwards it's Kris Kross. Like they say with cars, those mofos depreciate in value as soon as you drive it off the lot. Though today we have "Stuntin is a Habit" It reminds me of that Big Tymer's song "Still Fly", "ain't got no job, but I stay sharp. Can't pay my rent, cuz all my money's spent". lmfao…I used to always love when they said "shahhp" because my auntie/mama STAY using that word to mean fly. Whenever I think of the word I think of Steve Harvey. He's the epitome of "sharp"…but I digress.
What I truly hate about stuntin' is not only being overly flashy, but being overly flashy for SOMEONE ELSE'S BENEFIT. Like those clowns that rock Reese's or Dora the Explorer on their car. Um, boo boo, that is FREE ADVERTISING. Not only are you wasting your money, you are wasting potential money that the company could have paid you to display their logo/image/likeness. But no, you gon' do it for free. My people, my people…
Cheekie, if you want to get real country, the phrase is: Sharp as a tack on Christmas mornin'! lol!
That Big Tymer's line was what got me thinking about hood rich in the first place.
"Got everything / In my mama's name / but I'm Hood Rich / la da da"
I will admit the song was tight, but gotdamn man … gotdamn you!
This is not getting to the right people. They don't read blogs that aren't dedicated to the very things you are talking about. If you turned this into a rap over a tight beat, maybe, maybe, they'd get it. Eh! Who am I kidding?
im coppin a 7 series off the strength of this post!
Ms. Smart,
Is this what you had in mind?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlKL_EpnSp8
r-e-a-d-a-b-o-OK!
Streetz…
Just one? I say you get a 7 series big body, a 6 coupe and a X5 on twankies nucca…then get some of these:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nnzw_i4YmKk
LOL X5 is for wifey son… I just need a pair of 24s and that new Kenwood system and im str8! Fuk a rent!
This is Temps but I just got my blog up-hence the name change
Well I posted on my FB page dude on the 3 train had a "gucci" bag in one hand and a Benefits card in the other-looooser!!!!!
I would like to look at this from the perspective of relationships.
Interesting topic being a few weeks back on this blog or maybe another one a woman wrote on "what a man should have by a certain age" with no distinction she threw any male under the bus for living with his parents.
Yet I see some of yall up here (and the men on that blog) all cited the FINANCIALLY SMART reasons why we should (just like every other race-dirt poor or very well off at some point go back to mom and dads pad.
But even our women (some) see that as some sort of sign of weakness. I aint blaming women for dumb men blowing their money but I dont know any young black couple in which either one of are living with a parent. Or are living somewhat modestly. Instead they are paying (NYC rent) $900-1500 for a shoebox with two holes in it, place so small half of their stuff is in storage which they pay for that too on a monthly basis. Still cant find a parking spot, shopping centers are "i-ght" and the schools are awful to decent and the service are also awful to ok. Yet best be assured idiot men who live like this have a GF.
Yet me, who moved back in to his old apartment in the bricks is able to save and REINVEST in himself by starting his company. No girl but I am doing my film thing like I said I would when I was 20 yrs old. I brought a G5 and Final Cut Studio with some of that loan money I had, eff some gear and a car…I live in Brooklyn!!!!.
So I guess if some black women insist on their boo having (in the words of Rolland Martin) the "full buffet" upon their initial meeting how can she get mad that her man has lousy fiscal principles?
And if these men are such wimps that they feel they cant live with out their frilly a$$ toys well then they need to Die. Slow.
*****Slooooooow Clap!**
I wish we had stats on just how many people are living at home and are really saving their money and investing it. I wish we had the numbers on how many people who are living alone really can't afford it. Even if they stayed home, would those people every make financially sound decisions when they did get out of mom and dad's basement? We'll never know for sure but I think this problem deals with our societies unwillingness to re-embrace DELAYED GRATIFICATION and financial responsibility, and long-term investment strategies.
Also, whoooaaa on the Black women. Have you not met any white women? I have a good number of white friends as well as unfiltered access to white women. If you think they don't have a problem with a man living at home, you're mistaken. They're just passive-aggressive in their disdain.
OMG! Thank you so much for putting this up! I cannot stand to see these "hood rich" type of men. I swear when I pass through the hood (because I sure as hell don't stop), I see every luxury vehicle parked outside of the PROJECTS from Lexus to Escalade! I do not understand why a man feels that having a nice car with no true assets is sexy. Sure the ride is nice but seriously, what makes you think I want to go back to your mother's apartment and go to your room and keep quiet so we don't wake her? Negro please! (Just because your favorite rapper has it doesn't mean you need it!)
I don't think this is a black thing. Being "hood rich" sucks, but stunting in general, as in living above your means, is something that the american culture as a whole, ESPECIALLY WITH WHITE PEOPLE (who by the way lead in foreclosures and bankruptcy filings), has embraced. Hood dudes might do it with a $5,000 chain or some designer frames, white folks do it with new lawns, $8,000 rugs, and designer gowns.
Your point is well accepted though, but there are those of who contribute to their own Roth IRA, add to their cd's, paid for their vehicles in cash, etc… such as myself. And you'll STILL see me with Gucci loafers and $400 Air Force 1's. I just make sure my bills are paid and I save 15% out of every check first.
@Ms Smart Does about this quote:
"Also, whoooaaa on the Black women. Have you not met any white women? I have a good number of white friends as well as unfiltered access to white women. If you think they don’t have a problem with a man living at home, you’re mistaken. They’re just passive-aggressive in their disdain."
Does this come from anecdotal reasoning or from empirical deduction? I wouldnt know what white women dont really like because I have never nor plan on dating white women.
I have enough trouble with some black (yes materially driven) women. Why would I date an entire race of women whose brothers (some not all but far too many) think Obama aint an American citizen and he's Hitler reincarnated?
My opinion is based on the couples I have seen. College educated or not most black couple I HAVE SEEN dont believe in that moving back in with the Folks…so let me be clear THIS generation of blacks looks down on moving back in with the Folks under ANY circumstances.
Well IMO buying all that crap before thirty and you single is hustlin backwards and it reeks of being an insecure nouveau riche avaricious snobbish SOB. As they say in psych all this is done to impress the Imaginary Audience..other known as "They and Them" or more popularly referred to as Haters.
This also includes doin the roommate thing for the most part I see some black women do it but they are more the exception not the rule. I suppose too those white ppl that you have unfiltered access too speak for all whites?
I'm a white woman, and we have the exact same pet peeves as black women. Why would anyone think it would be different? I would tend to frown on a man living at home. Shoot. I am 33. You should have your own spot by this age. for sure. I am also QUITE unimpresseed with the material possessions. I think the people impressed by that are people who have grown up in poverty? When I see the escalade, I'm thinking, damn, I bet he is broke! LOL
LMAO
This post is definitely what's up. I think this is nuts for these hood ass idiots to be trying to spend money they don't have. It's so stupid. But again, I think the problem is definitely the media. These rappers should take social responsibility for their community, and teach these fools that there's a small chance in hell that you (a regular black dude) can make it in that business. And moreso those rappers are renting those chains and cars and everything for their videos. Jake the Jeweler is making a ton because these fools are renting. The basketball players need to be schooled as well. Such a waste of talent.
I think part of the motivation for these guys is that they want to get girls, and unfortunately, this is what the girls are now driven by. I know it sounds old, but again, if women decided to stop chasing after these triflin ass bums with cars and jewelry, and got their own sheeot in order, maybe dudes would follow suit.
@ juli I was responding to a comment made by a poster about having unfiltered access to white ppl. Her silly line about ww would put up wit lame fiscal behavior but you guys don't speak on it was foolish. My point is one wk a blk women says under no circumstances is it cool for a man to still be @ home. Now on perhaps the same blog some of those black women are sayin move back in wit the parents wtf? In addition I made a point as a black man I feel as a generation we look down on movin back in, or roommating. Being defensive, or self conscious she brought "what whtie women really do" argument. I suppose that was meant to say why don't I (if I havent-already) ww as if you guys would put up with the same lame behavior.
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