From the many stories I’ve heard from friends, associates, and conversations that I eavesdropped on happen to overhear, it’s evident that men and women differ on fundamental issues. You’re a Republican, she’s a Democrat. You are a mac, she’s a PC She lives in my lap. You root for the Redskins, she’s a Cowboys fan. although they both aren’t as awesome as the NY Football Giants, but to each their own It is my goal to help the SBM community better understand one another so that the sex communication can improve. So I present the differences that men and women must know in order to have the best sex ever a better understanding of one another:
Venus: Emotions not EMOtions
Men, women are more in tune with their emotions. Our problem is that we always may dismiss these feelings as collateral damage from that time of the month. Open your eyes and see their responses to certain issues or actions. Their feelings aren’t as cryptic as we know they are one may think. It doesn’t make you emo to be in touch with feelings, it makes you smarter. Learn to empathize and you’ll get far.
Mars: The Spike TV Effect
Ladies, we as men enjoy many things that you would consider “childish” (i.e. Video games, comics, gadgets, anime, wrestling etc). Understand that these guilty pleasures don’t classify men as immature, it actually serves as an outlet for entertainment, stress relief, and overall enjoyment. We can have interests in “sophisticated” type of entertainment, but we need a balance. We need an escape at times from the harsh realities of life, and to be honest some of those things are just cool! You don’t have to watch WWE or know how to play Street Fighter, but just appreciate that we love this stuff. Its in our DNA I’m sure of it*
Venus: Its the little things that count [II]
Men sometimes think too much when trying to impress a woman. Our judgement gets clouded by reactions we can’t decipher, along with our simplistic nature for pleasure. We also at times don’t care for the details in courtship. Those minuscule, insignificant displays of affection that we abhor, women will adore. That’s why they remember every milestone in a relationship because they are super dooper snoopers they pay attention to detail. You should do the same or end up delinquent and past due on the pums (see what I did there?)
[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yirVFf03g3Y]
Mars: “I never change this is J every day”
Ladies, I have to break you off it to you gently: You cannot change men. If he changes, he changes because HE wants to make that change. Don’t sit in a corner and chant “Yes We Can”, because you’ll be disappointed. In fact, I would say show me a man that you can change with ease, and I’ll show you a relationship that won’t last. Unless you’re a woman who likes weak men #noshots I’m not saying to accept mistreatment or neglect, but you have to make him aware of your feelings and then the rest is up to him. Remember at the same time that we all have good and bad qualities, and if you truly believe his negatives are deal breakers, then tell him to get.the.steppin!
Venus: The Secret to Understanding Women
Fellas, I’m going to give you the greatest tip you will ever need to know about understanding women: You’ll never understand women 100%. No, I’m not kidding. I finally understood why women call us simple. A +B = C for us most of the time. For them the equation looks more like this:
They have constants and variables for which we have to solve. There’s the inverse, mod, and least common denominator to decipher. For my NYC brethren, they’ll make you feel like you are stuck on “red book” math with no chance ever of getting to AP Calculus. We can give you all the advice in the world, and a base knowledge pool of resources from which to formulate an opinion, but sooner or later you will have to analyze and act based off of unique situations. Don’t beat yourself up about failing to completely understanding a woman. You’ll see a unicorn in the hood before that happens. Remember your experience and heed the words of the wise and you’ll be fine.
Mars: Shortie get it in!
Women I’m about to bless your sexy bodies minds with KEY information. As men, we have the weight of the world on our shoulders. We go through things, more than you’d ever know, because we don’t speak on every single conflict we endure…unless dude is emo You have your inner spider sense which tells you that we exhibit some type of concealed stress. Sometimes we don’t want to talk about it. Sometimes we don’t need a lecture. These are the times where we need you to embody every sexual fantasy we have and just do it (no swoosh). You say we’re simple right? That’s as simple I can be to explain how that one gesture will have a dude appreciate you in ways you cannot imagine, and will have him reciprocate the sentiment.
These are some of the more prevalent observations I’ve made. My people, what other defining characteristics of men and women should we know in order to survide in this cold world? Let’s talk,
Streetz alias “We are NOT the same, I am a Haitian Martian”
nice post. LOL@ "Yes we can". Women have to realize that they cannot change a man- a lot of women have this misconstrued belief that if they show a man so much love- he'll change.
As for the emotions- yes we women are emotional, but i've met men way too bloody emotional for me- it's like wth?!!! I can't deal. lol.
agree with tigress here. i dont give a damn what anybody says, ive yet to meet a man that was less emotional than me. i'm tired of being told i "think like a man" by men, especially men who are far more emotional. i think men are late getting into the game of "emotions" and expressing them, and (for the most part) have no fucking clue how to handle them.
You know whats funny? my mom would speak to me when I told her about women issues and say "Listen, if she doesn't understand that you will change when you want to, then she needs to leave. If she chooses to stay she cosigns"
Realest talk. I paraphrase of course because if it aint about loans, she doesnt say cosign. lol
Cecelia, late? Some are rather early- even before u guys start dating.
I'm with Tigeress and Cecilia on the guys who are way too in touch with their emotions and show it early on…they need to STOP it!!
And the 'YES WE CAN' chanting women need to understand that you can never change any-one and I wouldnt want a man that every time I say jump he's asking 'how high?' I've heard my fellow women say 'give him time he'll change once he realises you're the one' and yes those women and that guy didnt work out, with most cases guy ending the relationship.
Good post
Well said truth….. you can't change a man, you can't get him to always tell you whats wrong cuz like u wrote, men don't like to speak on every single conflict they endure…….
Women should also understand that sometimes, when a man says he doesn't want to talk about an issue, he really doesn't wanna talk about it, its not cuz he doesn't want to talk to you.
Yo this is so true!
Sometimes as men we can get over stuff by not speaking. Every little thing does not need to be discussed! We will be ok! DAMN!! lolol
"Women should also understand that sometimes, when a man says he doesn’t want to talk about an issue, he really doesn’t wanna talk about it, its not cuz he doesn’t want to talk to you."
I think 95% of women don't understand this.
Hmm, this reminds me of a post I wrote for this site a while back that also starts with a Venus vs. Mars reference. It was about communicating in a relationship when there's a problem.
http://www.singleblackmale.org/2009/05/12/whats-w…
I co-sign on that…I use to be one of those girl who would practically force you to talk about an issue…and sometime i end up hearing things I didn't expect/want to hear. So, I have falled back in that tip…lol
Yea man. Its like… what about the term "pick and choose your battles" sometimes women pick ALL the battles to fight!
I'm going to have this damn song stuck in my head all day homie. Thanks a lot.lol.
lolol word!
This was interesting… I have to admit what caught my eye was the S.C. refereces. Someone has great taste in music…
Ha! The 'red book' intro to algebra takes me back lol….
Cute post…kind of elementary but cute none the less. I must have 'anti emo dude' on my forehead because I have NEVER met this guy. Where are these men? But as stated by SBM "learn to empathize and you’ll get far." That's GOLD right there. I only wish folks would learn empathy in relationships; would've saved a sistah a lot of heartache.
I loved the style of this post, good one, Streetz.
The mathmatical equation that is a woman had me dying. And shut up, ya'll know you love it.
Never said I hated it. I took Physics and Linear Algebra in College. Ask me if I know every solution to every formula tho. lol. Doesn't mean I hated the class 😉
True enough, but you guys do tend to complain about it every now and then. Guess it's a sacrifice for what you get out of it later. *shrug*
Yea, just like in school. You solve that shyt, you get satisfaction. You dont, then you cheat, lol
Girls love to call guys sensitive… this has become as common as women who think it's perfectly fine to admit they don't like cooking… whatever…
I really wanted you to put in a line saying, shorty calls me fwb, i call the chick my side piece. Just to bring it back full circle with how the girl bigs up her role in the relationship, but the guy DOES not.
i sustain your point on little things, at times, it's as simple as remembering that she likes extra cherries in her Dr. Pepper that makes her toes tingle.
Good post man, now let me put my post up before SBM shoots my ass.
Ciao.
Information so simple yet so complex….I saw myself in this, ya I can be that equation and the fact being I have NO clue how to solve the damn thing either! Whata challenge! Anywhooo I had to learn that when he doesn't wanna talk, he doesn't wanna talk. I just do my best to support without being a problem. I take his word for it and usually in a couple of days he comes back and "fills" he in. I've come to understand he's got enough problems trying to be a man I don't need to add any more nonsense to his already fragile shoulders…
Oh yeah let me append… Women are not that complicated. A wise mean once told me, "Just tell them what they want to hear." This works well. Try it some time.
only works on girls who cant tell the difference
Co sign…
Lol..why am I saying co sign all of a sudden…
SBM is changing my lingo and ish…
Accept the change my Nubian sister