As I continue to present both sides of the proverbial relationship coin, I am forced to do some self examination and admit my mortality. In addition, I must dig deep into my infallible wisdom to figure out the failures of my infallible wisdom. And every once in awhile I need to put it out there in a public forum (that means here) in order to keep my humble.
Come help keep me humble …
And before all the females get around and start pumping their fists in the air, throw their confetti, and start kissing each other ever so gently shouting for joy … please refer to posts 1 through 400 for your shortcomings (there are about 20 wildcards though).
Today I acknowledge the stupid things that us men do (as it pertains to relationships). This was hard … very very hard. It was like looking at diamonds for flaws … but I have dug deep and found em.
SBM’s List of Stupid Things that Men Do
Try and smash on the first date
So, I think it’s a well known fact that most men will take the poom poom if it is offered to them on the first date. The “stupid” part about it is we may really like a girl … I mean dreaming of the kids and all kinds of simp isht. We know that taking the offer will ruin our vision of the girl and kill any wifey potential … but still … we smash.
Ignore emotions, feelings, and anything related to it
If the game is on or we are in the zone on our Xbox, we aren’t trying to deal with crying or “upset” feelings. It’s usually a lot easier to ignore it and hope it solves itself. Sure, this may end up in withholdings of the dirty dug out, curse outs, or wifey stepping out … but … the Redskins are down by 3 and it’s the 4th quarter.
Refuse to Acknowledge a Fragile ego
All men have pretty fragile egos. Not only are we not quick to admit, acknowledge, or accept this … but they must be stroked in a very special way. It can’t be obvious and blatant, but we need to feel it at the end of the day. The peculiarities of the male ego are … peculiar. *sidenote* The Female Ego is just as bad if not many times worst than the male ego
Allow S*x to Rule … Everything
To say a man thinks with his d*ck is an understatement. We think, live, and are defined by it. As a result, every guy especially me has a slew of horrible horrible stories that pertain to the pursuit of the good googly moogly. Whether it’s a bad baby mama, car windows busted, or a bullet wound to the chest … every guy has negatively suffered at the hands of this addiction. I one time tried to shed my body of this cursed addiction. I was good for awhile … until I got the wrong text, from the wrong person, after reading a King Magazine. Next thing I knew I found myself waking up in a strange place, covered in sweat, smelling like caramel sauce, and with a g-string on my ear.
I actually don’t want to put this as a “stupid” thing, but it kind of counts. While it is not every man that fears kids and a picket fence, there are enough of us running from it. I don’t know why the idea of shackling ourself to one individual for an eternity and bypassing every new experience is so scary … oh wait … I just said why. Sure, our entire society would benefit from more black men looking for commitment … but who is trying to give up their freedoms for that?
I know there are other things that us “stupid men” do … but it took almost 3 months of research just to compile this list, there were deadlines. Men are pretty great ..
What did I miss? What did I get wrong, probably all of it? Have I sold us all out by listing these few things? Are these really stupid things that we do … or unique aspects of the male psyche that make us so great?
– SBM aka Still A Great Man