If She Ruled His World…


***Jesus told me to be easy on Good Friday, so here’s a throwback. Happy Easter and what not…***

No warm and fuzzy intro, let’s sit right down and go to church.  Today’s message from my pulpit is about controlling women.  From my novice observations, there are two types of controlling women.  The first type of woman has her man under physical control, known to the rest of the world as “p*ssy-whipped”.  We all know a dude who is egregiously whipped by his woman.  No matter what happens, whether this woman is right or wrong in any instance, she knows she can rope her man right back in with a roll in the sack.  This is problematic not only because of the way the power shifts in the relationship, but it sets a horrible precedent for both parties.  The man leaves the relationship thinking being whipped is OK, and the woman leaves thinking she can continue to use her goodies to dominate the men she encounters in the future.  Until she runs into a cocksman, of course.

The second type of woman has her man mentally whipped.  While being physically whipped does carry a mental aspect to it, the woman who has her man whipped mentally has a more deliberate hold on her man.  She does even need to touch her man to put him in check.  This doesn’t necessarily mean she’s verbally abusive to her man, but she knows how to push his buttons and psychologically manipulate him into doing exactly what she wants. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not throwing a pity party for weak minded men because men have been doing this sort of thing to women for years.  But as a man, it’s difficult to watch a dude with his girl in Macy’s holding wifey’s purse while she trying on clothes and yapping to her girlfriend on her Blackberry about how much fun they’re gonna have in the club tonight once she finds the right dress.  I often want to put on my “Captain Save-a-Bro” cape, swoop in and bring this brother to the light, but then again, who am I to upset nature’s balance.  After all, what he eats doesn’t make me sh*t.

See Also:  Die Kobe Die: Are We Cheering for Love Not To Work?

If you are reading this, and you are whipped either mentally or physically, there is not much advice I can offer.  If you’re p*ssy whipped, go to your nearest Duane Reade, pick up a p*ssy patch, and try to break your addiction as soon as possible.  It may sound like a daunting task, but if you want to reclaim your life and not end up as a lifetime purse holder, you have to make it happen.  I know you think right now that you can’t function if she doesn’t give you her loving, but trust me, you’ll survive.  If the patch doesn’t work, my second tip for you would be to turn the tables and whip the p*ssy.  Whip it, whip it good.  I guess it’s easier said than done, because if you could whip the p*ssy, you wouldn’t be in this situation to begin with.  But now you’re here, and you need to figure something out, so get it together.  If you need help, contact your local chapter of the League of Extraordinary Cocksmen, and they can advise you further.  If there’s not a chapter in your area, contact me.

For the mentally whipped man, all I can say to you my brother is run.  Run for the hills.  Run like your life depends on it, because it does.  In this situation, you are simply being mentally dominated by another human who clearly has a higher mentally capacity than you do, and has no problem using it for their own personal gain.  This is very problematic especially in a relationship.  Anyone involved in a situation where they are constantly being mind-f*cked by someone else is in a bad way.  And before the women try to rip me a new one in the comment section, let me state for the record that there is a difference between a strong woman in a relationship, and one who is purposely manipulative and vindictive.  Relationship or not, male or female, that’s just the type of person you need to avoid, period.  (Is saying period followed by a period redundant?)

See Also:  Being Cruel to be Kind

This is usually the part of the post where I would query of our dear readers if they have ever seen or experienced this phenom.  But I don’t even think I need to ask the fellas if they’ve ever seen or known a man who was whipped.  That’s like asking whether or not the sun rose this week.  Ladies, do you like to control your men or do have a friend that has her man wrapped around her finger?  Let’s build people, and hopefully today we can save a life.  I’m out.

Cocksman Extraordinaire,


  1. Being first almost makes me as happy as am booty. Not quite, but close. Yaaaaay!

    *ahem, puts on grown-up face*

    I can't speak for the rest of the ladies, but I like a man who can put his foot down. As an Aries, I am by nature a little forceful and can get tunnel vision on what I think is a good idea. Does it make me controlling? Only if you roll over, bruh.

    The Boo always surprises me with how good he is at getting exactly what he wants. Maybe it's a Libra thing. He's very soft spoken, yet he manages to get his way. Like, erry time. Sometimes I don't even know he's getting his way until I'm: making his favorite meal, having chex when I was supposed to be studying for that masters, watching a ufc fight, rootin' for Carmello before they lost to that shrewish man Kobe, etc. and I'm like, "How did I get here?" Only place I REALLY put my foot down is on 4th and Long. Dayum Dallas and dayum their little bogus show!


    Anty-who – I'm with Lex on this one. Women need to feel powerful, too. We may not be able to out arm-wrestle you, but we will submit you with our minds. Which can turn ugly. Run away if she uses her powers for evil.

    Oh, and this: "…my second tip for you would be to turn the tables and whip the p*ssy."

    reminded me of Craig's daddy in Friday After Next, "I'm not p**sy whipped. I. WHIP'S. P**SY! Whap! Whap!" LOL!!!

    Happy Friday!

    1. I'm an Aries woman too and I have SUCH an issue with men I can easily control. It's nice to be able to do what you wanna do when you wanna do it, but I like a little fight every now and then to get sh*t started and have ballin-a$$ angry chex, which I LOVE.

    2. As an Aries, I am by nature a little forceful and can get tunnel vision on what I think is a good idea. Does it make me controlling? Only if you roll over, bruh.

      Thats why we agree so much lol

      Happy Birthday Girl

  2. while I was impressed by the content of this particular blog, I have no comment. and that's where I'll leave it.

  3. @ Anna.

    "reminded me of Craig’s daddy in Friday After Next, “I’m not p**sy whipped. I. WHIP’S. P**SY! Whap! Whap!” LOL!!!"

    that's exactly what i thought of. i love that movie.


    i hate to see a man controlled in a relationship. i really feel like telling them to grow a fucking backbone. i don't know which is worse, the physical or the mental.

    as far as the physical, i'm like shit if you wanna cut me off for some shit, go right ahead. i might be a man but i bet i have more willpower than you do. especially, if i feel like you're trying to use sex as a form of punishment or to get what you want. i mean your sex might be good but i'll be damned if its going to make me do something that i normally wouldn't do. i think that goes right into whipping the pusssy. lol

    the mental part gets at me too. like ana said, no woman wants a man that she feels she can walk all over. put your foot down <del>often</del> every once in a while. she'll respect you all the more for it. you don't have to do it by yelling or being disrespectful but let her know she's not going to always get her way. damn.

  4. the pussy whipped situation makes me wonder. if a man is married to a woman for a very long time, what happens when sex stops being the focus of the relationship? will the woman suddenly lose her control over the relationship? will the man suddenly turn feral?

    on the mental side, after a long term mental whipping, wouldn't the man eventually get tired? wouldn't he eventually stray? won't they end up like many of the numerous couples in family court on any given weekday with kids in tow to dividing up the assets? (more likely than not, she will come out on top because he doesn't have the smarts to outwit her).

    i say that both situations are lose lose. find yourself someone that is compatible to you — and if you feel a shift in the balance you better empower yourself, or prepare to be miserable!

  5. I am always in control, however, it doesn't have to be known that i'm in control. I'm a Libra. I really don't like doing things that I don't want to do. I'm an only child. If I said, i'm not doing it, i'm not doing it. I'm a Black man.

    You can't p*ssy control me because i'll just go eff some other chick. And you can't mentally whip me because very few people can ever get inside my head to see how I really think and work.

  6. RCLS : The P Patch reference is crazy funny. Men wish it were that easy.

    Do I like controlling my man : The second I manipulate a man, and he's not in on it, is the second I lose all respect for him.

  7. I guess I can’t relate. I don’t care if she’s Laila Ali or Gina Carano, there isn’t a woman on earth who can physically abuse me. Mentally, she can certainly try, but not too many people can crack my head. I wouldn’t say I’m mentally abusive, but I usually end up getting what I want.

    Redlady: “on the mental side, after a long term mental whipping, wouldn’t the man eventually get tired? wouldn’t he eventually stray?”

    Yep. You can’t keep kicking a wounded dog. If you are a woman, don’t think because a man is silent when you are arguing with him, it means you won. If he’s just silent or looking at you crazy, it means he’s likely going through his mental Rolodex to call the other woman, or just contemplating if staying with you is even worth it.

    Redlady: “(more likely than not, she will come out on top because he doesn’t have the smarts to outwit her).”

    This has nothing to do with smarts. This has to do with a biased court system against men. And then women wonder why men are so hesitant to get married.

  8. This Post Is A very Good One!

    I think the loss of respect aspect has been made clear with previous comments, if I can control you, I dont need to be with you. I cant be with someone whom I cant respect. However Just like Dr. J I am also a libra and I love getting my way, so I need someone who can keep me in Check because a relationship is about complementing eachother not controlling eachother. Furthermore, I find it kind of sexy when a man puts his foot down and stands by his word that shows me that he has character.

    I would like to second Redlady's comment, "the pussy whipped situation makes me wonder. if a man is married to a woman for a very long time, what happens when sex stops being the focus of the relationship? will the woman suddenly lose her control over the relationship? will the man suddenly turn feral?" What happens when the man finally gets over the P*ssy or can he even get tired of the P*ssy?

    The sad part is that some men dont want to admit they whipped, mentally of physically therefore you cannot help someone who does not want to be helped. I know some people like that and it worries me because I see how destructive that Shyt is. Is worst because the woman is not whipped so she runs wild whipping and abusing dudes like she some kind of d*ck master!

    I was dying at "“Captain Save-a-Bro” cape" and "the League of Extraordinary Cocksmen" Hilarious!

    PS:I want to know how does a woman who finds herself in this situation gets out, because once a woman gets D*ck whipped is over for her and her Life!

  9. @Anna N.- As a fellow Aries, I know exactly what you mean.

    I know how I can be sometimes, and I expect that the person that I am with can at least reel me in. I have never been with a punk a** man. However, I can't stand manipulative people and hate watching them in action.

    I had a friend who used to control her man and talk to him like he was 5. I couldn't take it, he was such a sucka. I finally told her about herself and she stopped after a while. She didn't realize how bad it was until I mentioned it.

  10. The first man that I ever loved was the first man that ever stood up to me. There is something to be said for the type of man that will stand his ground and not give into the whims of every request made of him. Paradoxically, we both at times made large sacrifices for each other. If there is little balance in your relationship and you are just being beat down and manipulated, then why stay? That is obviously not a healthy relationship. You can do bad all by yourself.

    Plus, men it's your responsibility to stand up for yourselves! People only treat you the way you allow them too. If you are being controlled, it's your own fault, and the same goes for women. I know very few women who want a weak punk. Breaking the control cycle will most likely increase her respect for you and restore balance to your relationship.

  11. There are few things more disheartening that a cat that is just straight whipped. However, my question is:

    What do you do when you know your boy is whipped, but it is clear that he has no idea that he is?

    How do you make him see the light?

    How do you clear the murky waters a whipped-dom to give your dude a chance to win at life again?

  12. You can’t p*ssy control me because i’ll just go eff some other chick. And you can’t mentally whip me because very few people can ever get inside my head to see how I really think and work.

    ^^ Dr J., I salute u noble sir!

    Understand something: Both my sisters are Libras, so I know EACTLY how "you people" operate, lol. I can cosign on the Libranomics.

    UNderstand also that Im a scorpio. THe mental games dont work because im hyper perceptive to the point that I can figure out a mystery even if i dont like the solution to the puzzle. THe physical dont work because I'd make sure that I put it down to the point that depriving the intercourse would hurt you >= me

    Finally the negative scorpio traits of being vendictive hold true. You eff around and play me, and then the real games begin. Sad, but true

    1. I commented on pu**y whipped in an earlier post that went missing. I was saying that, I don't think a man is ever really pu**y whipped because there is just too much pu**y out here and too many options to find new pu**y. I think men really want us to think they are whipped when really they're not……

      No I don't like to contol my man. I like to be controlled especially in the boudoir 🙂

  13. Like someone said earlier (I'm on the 'Berry and too lazy to scroll up), its hard to see cats just completely tore down by their woman. I gotta homie who when he first got with chick, n*gga fell off the map for about 2 months. When he resurfaced, me and the fellas instituted a "Captain-Save-A-Bruh" operation, and I'm proud to say dude is in recovery.

    As for the women out there who are gettin' over on p*ssy power for the time being, karma is a bitch. Eventually you'll find the guy you become convinced you can't live without, and homeboy is gonna *slap! slap!* Break. That. Ass. I refuse to be whipped, its just not possible for me. I'm a dead-in-the-middle Scorpio (Oct. 31) and have a very dominant personality. Shots will and do get fired where necessary, with no hesitation.

    I challenge my bruhs out here to step up, if they haven't already, and come to the Light. I promise, life is much better when you don't take that sh*t. And I also sgree with another cat on here who said that it can be achieved without being blatantly disrespectful. I just happen to enjoy being agressive.

    But there's more than one way to skin a cat.

  14. @ Coach Phil

    Eff his girlfriend. If that doesn't work, show him the Best Man and ask him if Murch is his favorite character. If that doesn't work, try waterboarding.

    1. Murchie! Lol, he still ended up losing the girl even after he stood up for himself. Or did he break up with her? I don't remember, but she was crazy… until Terrence Howard's character turned her out.

      All in all, Murchie still ended up looking stupid.

      Question: Was Morris Chestnut's character p*ssy-whipped if he knowingly married a girl who slept with his best man years ago? Is he just hella enlightened? I was always curious about the ending to that movie.

  15. Dr. J – I've seen the best man a couple times and don't remember a character named Murch. Then again, I uset to smoke. A lot. Saving Silverman was a good flick for that, though. Dudes went hard with the kidnap and faux funeral.

    You sure you're not my man? Because you 2 have some similar ways – Sounds like some ole Libra nonsense to me. If you are, and you were out getting some ex-heffa a dog the other weekend iQuit you, lol!

  16. Murch was the guy who kept get played by his girl Shelby. The actor is the same actor who played Mercutio in Romeo & Juliet. He ended up getting with Candy the stripper at the end.

  17. Since everyone is throwing around zodiac signs… They don't call us Taurus the bull for nothing. I'm very head strong and I definitely need a strong man. Not to say I'm about arguing (bc bulls don't argue)n but there is nothing more unattractive than a weak man.

  18. I think by nature I am not very controling. i cant have a man i can control. i need my man to be strong, not just physically but certaintly mentally. Saying this, there have been times when the P***y has been used to get my way. Like " Baby, will you do the dishes while i take a shower, i promise it'll be worth the work" And the dishes get done, i get my shower, and i reward my man exceptionaly well. Those incidents are on occasion. i dont think they mean my dude is whooped. if anything he whoops the P***Y!
    As far arguements go, dont like them. would never withhold sex from my man cause of an aruement. if anything we argueing i'm gonna try to throw it am more.
    I agree that each person needs to find someone that compliments them. I love me a strong man, that speaks his mind, says what he wants , and wont let me get away with nothing unless he wants me too.

  19. while we all agree its easy to be not pussy whipped by regular women

    i want to see the dude who wont be pussywhipped by Naomi campbell or lykebede or girls of their like

    or maybe even haille berry when she was in her twentys (she is over 40 now…so i wont fall for that mousetrap)

    1. lol well sh*t, it seemed like Halle's ex was f*cking everyone BUT Halle, so maybe she's just not the best example to use.

      And as for her being 40, studies have shown that while men reach their sexual peak in their 20s, most women get there during their 40s. Hence, cougarism.


  20. Personally, I don't see an issue with physically whipping a man TO AN EXTENT. I want to be addicted to what the d*ck did in the case of a long-term relationship because I don't want be unsatisfied and end up on the creep. Same for him, I'm sure. But I'm not the type to withhold sex as punishment, 'cause that's just childish. I think of the Golden Rule and I KNOW I'd be out if a man tried to sequester the d*ck over a bullsh*t fight about which movie to get from Redbox.

    Mentally, nobody should be whipped. Both halves of the relationship should have independent thoughts, largely uninfluenced by what the other person wants. More often than not (notice I'm not saying always or everytime), men will take advantage of a woman they can easily control and women will abuse the hell out of a brother whose wallet they can influence. There has to be some give-and-take.

    Personally, I've been with both sides of the spectrum. One guy refused to compromise ever and it drove me CRAZY, because it seemed like the world rotated around him. In contrast, right after that, I went with a man I could mold like Play-Doh, but that sh*t wasn't fun either because I need a man who can stand his ground and not be so easily raped by me in our sexual relations disputes.

      1. thought mine was gone too but for some reason when i checked 'previous entries' i saw that this post comes in twice…so the post prior to this one is the same article (and not DJ's post on Jill Scott)…that's the post with our comments on RCLS' 'if she ruled his world'…cant quite be bothered to drag mine over

  21. I think there are two posts. One of them is the original post from June of 2008 or something and one of them is today's re-posting.

    I was confused by it too.

  22. As another Scorp up in here I'll just say there's nothing more pathetic than a p-whupped man. And if it ever happens to me I've asked all my friends to please take me out behind the shed and set me free "Ol Yeller" style… Lulz!

  23. hmmm…

    I find libras, pisces, and sags to be some of the most submissive men I encounter.

    I'm dominant all around and have a pretty good understanding of BDSM and female led relationships (FLR). Its not an easy task to commit to submit to another individual. Many in the scene consider it the ultimate show of love and devotion.

  24. "But I don’t even think I need to ask the fellas if they’ve ever seen or known a man who was whipped. That’s like asking whether or not the sun rose this week."

    One of the funnies of this post. Well not much of a comment but damn, I read this and all I can think of is "A Family that Preys" where Sanaa Lathan was a TERRIBLE cheating wife who mentally abused her loving man. Okay.. I'm done. I hate her for that still.. But men, get it together. You can definitely crack women. Good luck =/

  25. There is nothing wrong with a woman having more control over the relationship. Is it allegedly better as woman, to be the one thats "whipped", "open", "strung out" or whatever you want to call it? I know some will argue that neither situation is preferable, but lets be realistic. 9 times out of 10 it is one or the other.

    So I say ladies kudos to you if you're man treats you like the queen that you are and does EVERYTHING that your heart desires. Dont let anyone tell you differently! This is not always a sign of weakness!!!

    *speaking of manipulation… Men let your fellow brothers, fathers, cousins, and friends DO THEM!!! And stop with the "mind games" telling them that they're "WHIPPED"!!! Find you that SPECIAL one and I guarantee you will be "whipped"as well!

    Woman are POWERFUL creatures my friends!


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