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** Read a lot of preference blogs in the last few days and the issue of height has arisen hella frequently. Decided to touch on this topic one year later. Enjoy!**
I had a conversation with my homegirl about Sotomayor’s appointment to the Supreme Court men and women issues. She read my article on relationship dealbreakers and said that I forgot one important dealbreaker: Height. To give you some background, she’s about 5’11-6ft barefoot, same height as me, (and DON’T try to dispute this Sea Sea!), and she emphatically stated that she refuses to date a man shorter than herself. I wasn’t aware that height was that big of an issue, but she quickly pointed out a few reasons why dudes would be denied from getting on the ride if they didn’t reach her height line:
Can’t have a man shorter than my mom – Her mom is about 5’6″ – 5’8″ and she can’t have a man shorter than mom dukes. I laughed at this one. I didn’t see the real logic in it, but I guess because she doesn’t feel her mom should tower over the man she’s dating? I’m like damn what if they were a WNBA family, I’d look like a boy amongst Amazons!
“I want to wear heels!” – My homie is obsessed is worse than Carrie Bradshaw would cook dinner naked for a man who copped her Louboutins loves high heels! Heels are a must when she’s hittin the runway or the hottest party in the city (LOL @ me sounding like one of those fashion show emcees). She’s taller than me with heels (but not by much), so I can see how a short brother would look like her son next to her. She doesn’t want to compromise her fashion for a dude’s ego, and I can respect that.
Security – This goes hand in hand with the mom point. She wants to feel secure with her man, that she can protect her and take care of her. Height plays a role in this for her. A man taller than her has more presence and stature and comes across as that dude who can break her back in 7 places hold her down if she needs assistance.
Masculinity – In her own words “Being tall gives you that athletic persona, and makes you more of a man”. **shots fired**
I know that dudes have similar height biases as well. Men may prefer a shorter or taller women depending on their personal preference. My older cousin loves.women.taller.than.HIM! It’s damn near comical that he’ll stay with a woman at least 3 inches taller than him or better. Some dudes love the endless sexy legs on a taller woman, all the advanced moves you can do in the bedroom with that extra height, and just the model chick aesthetic in general. Other men feel insecure about having a woman taller than them, want to tower over their lady, and not feel like she can beat them down like a little boy next to them. They also don’t feel like standing on stepping stools anytime pictures/video is taken! I’ve never heard a real negative to dating a woman shorter than a man.
I have no real preference when dating in regards to height. I don’t know if I could date a woman extremely taller than me, just because my neck would hurt from looking up all the time. Seriously, I’ve dated taller, my height, and shorter, and I see no big deal. I know women who inquired about me ‘breathe a sigh of relief’ anytime they hear my height, so I know its a prevalent issue. I spoke to my twitter family and here’s what some had to say:
LADIES, Would you date a man shorter than you?
ActnJackson@streetztalk probably not. Don’t wana feel lk I could punk him. Besides tall is sexy. Did someone call u short?!?
MissEricka@streetztalk yes because it seems like short men are the only ones attracted to tall women like myself
butterflyylost@streetztalk Not ever shorter than me, though ppl should get a fair chance, I just might be vain. U wont catch my eye if ur shorter than me.
d_sassy1ne@streetztalk ehhh, no. Not NEmore *sorry short boys* My pref has always been taller & bigger. U better b all around fly if u my height lol
Fellas, would you date a women taller than you?
macariojames
@streetztalk i don’t want 2 date a shorty taller than 6 ft lol i like being in control lol so a shorty taller than me smh 5’1 area is yummy
TAUT_7RT @streetztalk Fellas: Would you date a woman taller than you? Why or why not? <– not unless her name is candace parker.
LastoftheBest@streetztalk Yes. I am ready for an Amazon… Almost promised I will have a LeBron or Dwight Howard on my hands…. That my retirement plan
lonnie1906@streetztalk all my g/fs were taller than me…u can’t help who you are attracted to
HCharlesRT @streetztalk Fellas: Would you date a woman taller than you? Why or why not? -hell yeah as long as the height to weight ratio isn’t crazy
kerbito@streetztalk damn that would make her at least 6’1″, got damn.. I’d need a step ladder to pleasure the titties even
I know a few height-challenged brothers who I will directly send this blog to hear them voice their opinions of this height discrimination. Are these points valid? Are they superficial? I know my amazons have to speak on this too. Is height really just a number, or is this “deeper than stats”?
Sincerely Yours,
Your homie is right.. having a man being taller than you just makes you feel secure, commands attention and some sort of respect.
I love being able to tip-toe up to kiss my man and wrap my arms around his neck, there's just something that makes me feel super girly and romantic..
you short Streetz? Lol
Definitely gotta cosign the feeling secure thing! If you're shorter than me, I feel like I'm in the role of protector. Not hot. And I'm only 5'5 so if you're shorter than me . . . you're really short for a man, lol.
i do understand the protection thing…it's nice a be with someone that steps in and you know he can stop any kind of nasty or crazy coming at you..
another thing about being with a shorter man that I ‘ve seen with a friend is her short bf couldn’t stop the onslaught of advances towards her from guys tripping that think they got game…he always stepped in but cos it happened so often he started blaming her that she encouraged it…from what I witnessed a couple of times that wasn’t the case…I just put it down to the fact that it's not exactly healthy being in a relationship if guys keep trying to step up to your woman and chat her up with you (her man/husband) stood right there cos they size you up and tag you as a non-issue…who wants to be thought of an insignificant pesky little thing that can be swat aside like a fly…
LOL.. Nah homie im 511-6ft depending on the day/situation
I don't believe you. I guess I'll bring the tape measurer when I see you. lol
How do you not believe me?! Why would I lie?
Ask Teflon and So Flyy lol
Depending on the day/situation? What, one pair of shoes might have a much thicker sole than the other?
Una chisteza…lol
height has been all over lately.. but that's cool, cuz it's a break from people tellin me why i won't marry..
the height thing is an issue.. i don't wear heels all the time, but i have some friends that are my height with heels..and i have to bend down to take pics with them.. it's a lot of readjusting..
i will say, if the guy is secure with being shorter than me, that's fine.. but a lot of the time, that's just NOT the case..
ex- was my height.. and heard that such and such liked me.. proceeded to FIGHT (yeah, i said it) said dude.. to this day, i'm like "i was WITH you, you didn't have to prove your manhood.."
note: dude that liked me was on the football team.. HUGE!!
other ex- my height with heels.. he already had insecurity issues, so needless to say, he was quick to tell me that i was emasculating him by being his height when i was dressed!..
note: walking along riverfront one night.. saw sketchy characters and i said "dang, i need to get some pepper spray" fight ensued.. "you don't think i can protect you?" he said.. it wasn't til that moment that i realized i didn't..
it's a mental thing.. height= strong soldier-man the same way that to most people glasses=intelligence..
like i said, i DO need my man to be able to protect me.. how's it gonna look if gunshot ring out and i get hit cuz YOU'RE the one closest to the ground..
that's a nono..
Gunshots tho? done. thats funny though.
Is this a first-time poster… with a pic up already? Thanks for saving me the trouble of linking to gravatar.
I've dated a few 6'0+ tall men & i have to say I prefer them to the dudes closer to my height. I'm 4'11 so if I procreate w/ someone who is shorter than me, our kids would look like they belong in the lollipop guild! I can't have my chillrun (yea, I meant to spell it like that) go out like that!
And my LS loves men that are shorter than her and her fiancé is just that! She has some sort of "napoleon complex" where she needs to be taller than her man. She loved standing next to me too cause she is so much taller than me (and never had a problem voicing that)!
Hopefully, i'll find someone that has some height over me (that's still taller than me when I have heels/wedges on) but that's a hope! #cantalwaysgetwhatyouwant
o_0
You will have no problem finding anything taller than you…with heels on.
LMAO! I've talked to a dude that i would've been a bit taller than in heels, like 2 inch heels, LOL! He tried to clown me on my height but i gave him a wake up call every time!
I swear fo gawd if you cant find a man 5'4 or taller, there are bigger fish to fry
I hope to find someone over 5'4, more toward the 5'9+ end, my children will need height as my fellow vertically challenged cohort has stated! lol
CO-SIGN! I'm 5'0…i'm really just being considerate of my future children who I really hope will get some height from that future SO cuz they probably aren't getting any from me. #flop
Damn L.Dejean, over a foot difference? Why you worried about meeting someone over 5'0, I wouldn't think that'd. be an issue.
Anywho, I'm 5'4ish and don't really run into this problem much, but when I do, it's not an issue.
Right!? And we over here are like yeah tall is good – you know, thinking maybe a few inches – but over a foot taller? Damn!
I ain't gonna front tho, I've seen many couples like that and I'm always curious to know how the mattress mambo functions lol #curiositykilledthecatbutnotthep*ssy lol
I am 5'4 (almost) & I would never ever in life date someone shorter than me! 1st of all as a man, if you're my height you're kinda like a midget lol. I only date guys that are taller than me. I prefer 6'3 & up but 6' even will do (barely). I like tall dudes for the protection aspect, the fact that I wanna rest my head in his chest when we hug & I wanna be on my tippy toes when we kiss. I think dudes being a foot taller than me is cute. Oh yeah & big hands is a MAJOR turn on (just looks more manly)! I've dated a basketball player who was 6'6 with the same size hands as me (no bueno). I have very long thin fingers. Anywayz, guys have found my preference offensive (only the 6 footers of course). I don't think it should be taken that way as it is my preference & not a requirement. My father is over 6 ft, my mother was 5'11, my brothers are over 6'4 (1 is still growing) & my 14 year old sister already towers over me so I'm used to being around tall people (I feel safe around them). So yeah, tall men are manly, sexy & I'm almost guaranteed to have a tall child if I procreate with a tall man (looking at my genes). *Short guys need not apply* Hee Hee
I've dated women from as short as 4'10" to as tall as 5'11", i'm "5'9 with the soul of a 6'4 aggin." I got a few things to say about this in general and about relationships. 1) It's all about who you are and how confident you are in your heaight. I knew a long time ago, I wasn't going to make it to 6' tall, I left that decision up to God and kept it pushing. 2) All, if not most of the people i'm seen out with are taller than me. I always joke that it's cool that my friends are 6'3 and taller because it makes me look like I have bodyguard going in the club. 3) It's real cool to be 6'4 and taller until all y'all have to pile in a car. I used to play AAU basketball and trust me it was painful for some guys.
But in other news, I never been afraid to talk to any woman I thought was beautiful. And I love me some long legs. So I dated a couple volleyball chicks who was tall, I even spent a few years only dating basketball chicks so they was 5'6 to 5'9. I think about it like this, it's my problem, not theirs. I think a lot of dudes think the woman is worried about it, man they been taller than men they whole life… your short a*s is not a problem. A lot of dudes even who are their height won't approach them, and i'm not about to stand around allow celibacy de facto.
I can't lie, when you dating a chick that's your height, you do sometimes get frustrated when she wants to rock 4-inch heels, but it's only a joke. Luckily for me, when I was dating the volleyball shorty, Diesels was in style. (Don't date yourself J.) Oh yeah and my best friend, who is a girl, is 5'9 and we go everywhere together, and yes, she wears heels everywhere we go. I don't have a Napoleonic complex, I think I am fine all by myself.
My shoes look flyer. My clothes look crisper. What can I say? If a girl thinks i'm too short, that's cool. It's too many women out here to ever get upset about one who doesn't want you. "Women are like buses, miss one, next one coming. BURR."
I concur!
"It’s too many women out here to ever get upset about one who doesn’t want you." <– and there it is
I've accepted the fact that I wasn't going to be tall a long time ago. No use crying over spilled milk. I've mostly dated women shorter than me or my height (w/o heels), but it's never been a problem. Work with what you got and recognize who you are.
I'm not gonna lie, having a chick that's taller than me is a bit emasculating, but it's not like she intentionally became taller than me for the purpose of negating my genitalia. If I like you & you like me, then we'll deal with the rest along the way. I do prefer women shorter than me though.
most of the best dressed men I've ever met are around 5'9 5'1-. seriously. maybe they are fly to compensate but I can't call it, I love a well dressed man! and since I'm short too its never ever bothered me…
there are so many other things that make a man attractive and height just isn't one of them for me. I've never had a man not seem masculine or lack in the ability to protect me…
most of the best dressed men I've ever met are around 5'9-5'10"
Agreed. That 5'8-5'10 crowd are a flyy bunch. & shoe game = immaculate.
I was tempted to not reply, but I will go ahead and answer. For me, no I would not date a woman taller than me, unless she was undeniably beautiful (inside AND out). That would mean she is 6'5 barefoot or taller since I'm 6'4. But the chances are finding that are damn near impossible, especially since a Celtic scrub copped the only one most men would date back when she was a freshman in college (Candace Parker).
Me personally, I have always been attracted to tall women (5'9 to 6'1), even when I was younger and wasn't as tall. When I was a freshman in high school, there was this girl on the basketball team who was tall and very beautiful (she was 6'1), and felt very insecure saying anything to her. Keep in mind that I was a 5'4 freshman. But a year, and an 8 inch growth spurt later, that conversation became more possible, and we became friends throughout high school (couldn't holla because she had a man that was 6'5 and on the basketball team himself).
Although most times I attract short women (under 5'4), taller women have always done it for me. But as women get taller, having one that "does it" for most men becomes more rare.
Welcome, and I'm glad you did reply.
LOL Sane Rich has posted many times here… U welcomed him earlier this week!
**Carton Amarillo**
I will say this much: I feel more welcome here than at any black church in Chicago. MESSAGE!!
Damn it, and I remember that now too. It was the "I was tempted to not reply" that threw me off. Don't mind me, Richbrand, my brain is all muddled right now. I'm glad you feel welcomed though. Also, this wouldn't happen if you have an avatar :).
You're 6'4?!? Hello my name is Satya how are you lol.
Well, my daddy was the shortest person in our house at 5'4" – and he was an awsome dad so I have a soft spot for shorties. He was no stranger to standing on the box at Sears photo time, lol. But at not quite 5'5" I really don't run into too many men that are shorter than me. I don't look at short men like they're not masculine. Most make up for their short stature by working out a little more so they're still strong, plus shorties tend to have a take charge attitude (read: Napolean Complex) that I like. Most women look at tall men like they'll automatically protect them/are more manly – but shorter men tend to show and prove while tall guys stand around lookin' cute.
One caveat: just don't be short where it *really* counts, bruh, lol.
Every (and I do mean every) woman that I know who has the "6' and over only" clause in her requirements list is single as the day is long.
ditto on this (except the dad part, mine is only 5'8 though)
I read daily and rarely comment, but I believe this post was written with me in mind. I am 6'1 barefoot (and love heels) and if I never dated anyone shorter than me, well, I would never date. It took a long time for me to get to this point, but a man being several inches shorter than me really doesn't bother me. Many of my friends who are much shorter than me (some as short as 5'2") won't date men under 6'0. One of them went on a date with a guy 5'7 and said it was great, but the only con was that he was too short. I just had to SMH. Anyways, I will be back later to read more.
Great post!
Co-sign 100% with Dr J. It really is about confidence. On both sides. The girl has to be confident kickin' it with the shorter dude, and the guy has to be confident kickin' it with the taller woman.
I dated a guy shorter than me. It was… well, just really awkward. His hot spot was at my waist. Can't get down like that.
Since then, I'll only date guys taller than me, but I'm only 5'4" so that's no real hardship (I hope). I don't however feel like I need someone who towers over me. 4-6 inches is plenty.
My girlfriend, who is a little over 6' hates that short woman go after super tall men, "leave one for me!" As though her chances are diminished because all the tall men will be taken. Idk bout all that, but height does seem to be a huge issue for tall women…
streetz if she's got a #meanshoegame = likes sporting 4-5 inch heels…she's taller that you by a lot in them! lol
i get the party thing…legs looks better in heels…& women can pull off all kinds of sexy strutting in heels…
it's not a real deal breaker for me… but i will say that had an ex (he's was ever so slightly taller) that started begging..yes… begging me to stay in flats when his friends came by…i didnt get it but for the sake of peace i did cos #dude betripping….figured the peer pressure issues were his and not mine
I prefer a man taller than me….so, no, I probably wouldn't be attracted right off the break. But, if a shorter guy approached me really confident, cute, with humor and he said something really clever about his height to set my mind at ease…I probably would be so intrigued I would give him a chance…..I would try it and see how it goes.
I guess at 5'9 and some forgotten fraction I qualify as a shorter guy, so I can weigh in.
To me, height preference only becomes a bias and extremely superficial when it's some outlandish expectation. Like women who are 4'9 to 5'6 only dating dudes that are 6'5. Same goes for shorter men who can't deal with taller women because they feel inferior.
Height preference falls in line with skin complexion, body type/weight, facial features, etc. – You like what you like but when you turn down a good person because they don't fit one or more of your "checklist items," you're cutting your nose off to spit your face.
Let the church say….Amen!
And I meant "spite." Whoops.
I like em big i like em tall i like em slim i like em small i like em all
LOL!
I keeps it simple girl.
Well I am 5'8. But not small. Never been small. Over 200 pounds my entire adult life. I think that makes a difference as far as how women perceive you. But not that much of a difference. Discrimination based on height is so real. I date women taller or smaller. Don't really care. I think when you carry yourself with confidence and are not self concious about your height women respond. But here are a few observations/reccomendations from me:
1. When your girl wears heals….you wear heals. This will keep you from looking like a midget in the club. Get a pair of Kenneth Coles or Cole Hanns etc etc. Anything with a heal and you'll be straight.
2. Ladies….In boxing they seperate divisions by weight. Not height. I know it's all about perception. But the truth is in a fight between a guy 6'5 210lbs and guy 5'8 240lbs. 9 times out of 10 the short guy will win. But hey I know to women height equals protection. Honestly I've known more than my share of punk tall dudes. I mean they don't get in as many fights so half the time they don't know how to fight. Now the dudes that can really scrap are usually like….Mike Tyson for instance. Mike is listed at 5'11 but from most pictures I've seen he looks to be more like 5'10 maybe 5'9.
3. The napoleon complex. This is the most unfair thing in the world. Cause if you are short guy and you get into a fight with someone bigger than you….people say you have a complex. But what am I supposed to do? Go around letting people punk me. Truth is, as so many of you have pointed out, when you are short people test you more. So if you aint no punk you end up getting in more fights.
Just a few observations.
#cosign
I guess none of these women with height fetishes have ever watched fights on the pro basketball courts. These dudes may be 6ft Mandingoes in every day life but in a real scrap they start slap fighting like bitches….:0)
Right. Basketball players are dudes that didn't want to play football because of all the hitting. 🙂 Plenty of football players are short. I always root for the short dudes. Loundon Fletcher, Pro Bowl Middle Line Backer for Redskins, 5'8. 🙂
funny how all you shorties are trying to justify your ability to protect a woman by throwing salt in the game of tall dudes. i'm tall (6'6) and trust i got hands.
#Cosign Mad Scientist! I'm 6'1 and I definitely am confident in my hand game…HOWEVER, if the hand game fails me…I have what you may refer to as "TD Jakes" cuz it'll help ya see Jesus!
#boystop!
Ya remember when Charles Barkley slammed Shaq? #noroo
Chris Childs punked Kobe?
Guess who was sshorter…
Does that L for Shaq count in his Wrecking w-l total?
Well, I gotta come out of lurking and comment on this one. Height is not an automatic dealbreaker, BUT, the guy would definitely have to be extraordinary. I am 5'9, thin with long legs, therefore I look even taller.
I co-sign all the above about height making a woman feel secure, it looks more masculine, AND the heel thing
I have a friend who's 5'9 and he doesn't like when I wear heels around him, so whenever we hang out, I have to wear flats, LOL.
Another instance, this guy I met (he was in the car, so I couldn't see how short he was) was probably only about 5'3 when I finally saw him standing. We became friends, and he was the sweetest guy (to me), although he did have the Napoleon complex, and I just couldn't do it. I could not overlook it, no matter what. One time, my cousin and I went out and he invited himself along well after the plans had been made. Since I wasn't expecting him to come along, I had brought some 4" sandals to change into before going out. My cousin and I got there first and then he joined us. No lie, he was the same height standing as I was sitting (on a stool), so when we got up to leave, it was a disaster. I heard people snickering and it was not a good look. I looked like Andre the Giant next to him…from that night on, I decided height was an issue.
One guy told me he always wanted to have sex with a tall girl so she can wrap her legs around him, LOL. He was around 5'5 or so; he got the side-eye.
Most shorter guys tend to try to holla though…LOL
My current SO is 6'0, which to me is still not tall, when I'm wearing 5" heels, but it's cool. My ideal preference is a minimum 6'2, so I can wear heels and he's still taller than me.
Welcome!
I think that height would be a much bigger issue for me if I was taller, and your story would be one reason. I wouldn't not appreciate that happening.
Thanks SaneN85! I read this blog frequently, but rarely post.
"One guy told me he always wanted to have sex with a tall girl so she can wrap her legs around him, LOL. He was around 5′5 or so; he got the side-eye."
*DEAD*
right. like a short girl couldn't wrap her legs around him. o_0 unless he had an abnormally large waist line.
LOL, I actually asked him the same thing and he said that he wanted a girl who could wrap her legs ALL way around (ankles crossed), not just stop on the sides….
And yes, he was a lil on the chunky side..
Please don't make me go in on that topic..LMAO
Im mad he said he needs loooong legs to wrap around the tummy!
*DEADDD*
Such bias 🙂
So if a man is short he is not masculine but if he goes around pistol whippin tall dudes all day he has a complex.
Dam….Can I live? 🙂
Lol. I know J.
They need to let you be great. lol.
I used to be all about tall men. If you were under 6-foot you needn't apply. My first boyfriend was 6'5" and I went up from there to the last tall one I had who was about 6'8". I'm about 5'7" and despite the fact that I pretty much live in 4-inch heels, I had a permanent neck-ache during my relationship with this man. Holding hands was an ergonomic nightmare. If I wanted to talk to him seriously and look him in the eye, I had to stand on the bed.
We were never ever on equal footing in that relationship and I think it has something to do with the psychological implications of continually having to look up at your man while he looks down at you.
Now I'm a lot more relaxed about height. I like the dainty feeling of being with someone who towers over me, but I also really, really like the Amazonian feeling of towering over a man.
aaah yes I've experienced the neck thing and thats when I had to rethink my height standards. lol I lowered them to 5'11 (remember I'm 5'9, so I'm not too shallow lol).
I have some real psychological dominance issues so I need the height…else the games no fun hehe
Uggghhhh, hearing all these short women state their preferences for extremely taller than them guys is crazy. If your 5'1 there's is no need to date a 6'1+ guy to feel 'protected'. I agree with Chris this is generally the time I consider bias and superficial and along the lines of skin color preference, etc.
Its just a pet peeve of mine to see height wasted (yes, wasted!) on tiny women lol
As a woman who is 5'9 and 6'1+ with her standard platform heels on a tall guy is a must!! I just cannot with a short man…and trust me I've tried. I couldn't take him seriously. I'm sorry.
My good male friends are short and they get on me (jokingly) every time we hang out and I'm in heels, although they love to look lol
100% co-sign!!!
"Its just a pet peeve of mine to see height wasted (yes, wasted!) on tiny women lol"
tell em how you feel then. lol
I agree with you. It's so annoying to see girls under 5'5 with 6' plus men. I'm always like wtf?!? I'm 5'7 and only ask for 5'10, taller is than 5'10 definitely apply =)
I think the height thing is definitely a matter of preference. I don't fault women who are attracted to really tall guys – I can see the appeal, but at 5'8 – I truly Adore (#Prince #SeeWhatIDidThere) women who couldn't care less.
I've never felt that not being over 6 feet was a hinderence to my dating life – only to my athletic life. I'm really good at basketball and football… and in high school… I was really really good – but, alas, I've been the same height since 12th grade and I don't have a larger body. I'm athletically built, but anything over my normal weight of 175 would look fat on me. I always assumed that the extra 3 inches God didn't bless me with in height, he blessed me with someplace else… #KanyeShrug
As far as my dating life has been concerned, I've always done better than average so I've never felt the effects. For whatever reason – I'm really not sure why – women have always liked me. Most of the women I've dated or been with, have been between the 5'0 and 5'7. My wife, is actually 5'0 even… so… we look great together, even when she wears the 4 inch heals.
OK, I lied i'm 5'10.
#shotsfired
I don't get it?
Just read your post #ISeeWhatYou'reTryingToDoHere – same difference, overall point remains the same.
Like you said, I was tall enough for every woman I ever wanted in my life, including my wife…
To your wife, you are tall. She's 5' 0, everyone is tall.
Hmmm… this is interesting. Most of my friends with the height requirement for their dates are like 5'2. How dare you at 5'2 demand a man be over 6' ?! Like really?! When in your life are you going to wear 8 inch heels? I mean if you are 5'2 why isn't a man at 5'7 good enough? I don't understand. Lol. They told me they are looking out for their children. #shrugs.
Maybe I have an opinion on it b/c I'm damn near 5'8, which I found out is kinda tall for a woman seeing as average height is like 5'4-5'5. I guess I never realized b/c to my family… I'm one of the short ones. All of female cousins are at least 5'9-5'10… My mom is taller than me and I've accepted the fact that she will always be. My preference has been for a man who is taller than me. Never really stated by how much b/c I figure if he's taller than me usually then a pair of 4" heels isn't gonna be too much of a problem.
Lately I've been "dating" guys are close to my height. The last three have been 5'8-5'9. They haven't seemed to have a problem w/ it & I really hadn't noticed, except one kept calling me an Amazon. o_O Weight to height ratio does help… b/c I did perceive those who were more lanky to be "smaller" than me than those who had more substance.
🙂 I love a Tall Glass of Water!!
5'7-5'9 is the perfect height…especially if you have a mean walk in some heels..Magnificent…
5'4 – 5'6 is nice too 🙂
And I've decided that I like wrapping my arms around the waist of a dude who is my height (or possibly plus an 1" or 2") and looking him in his eye as much as or maybe even better than putting them around the neck of a guy who is 6' or better…
& can a representative for the Tall Men of America please speak on why you all seem to have a preference for women who are 2 inches from midgetry.
Thanks.
Tall Man Representative…right chea!! Personally, 5'4 is the shortest I will go now…anything smaller I start feeling a little like R. Kelly and I dont like it! Not in all instances but feeling like that one more times is enough…LOL
Preferred = 5'7-5'9
#kanyeshrug
Wow. I was just about to say……I can't really explain it but I have always felt I had an advantage over other dudes because I can look women straight in the eye. Women seem to connect with me faster than they would a tall dude. Can't really explain it.
All i ask is that he be taller than me in flats and at least the same height in my "tall" heels. Since I'm 5'7 that means he needs to be 6 feet.
I have done shorter but if I have to make a preference- well let's just say I refuse to look down to notice you.
I'ont like the attitude that comes with short men.
I don't like the attitude that comes with tall men!
I was talking to a 6'6" friend of mine the other day about how he and other tall men know how much women rate them and that they really don't have to do much more than tower over the crowd to get attention. I like men with a better work ethic than that.
I don't think we're talking about the same thing. I find that short men have a level of arrogance that turns me off. It's like the ones I know are always trying to prove they are the 'shyt' in some unattractive ways.
I get what you're saying. I'm just saying let's not forget that some tall men have attitude problems too. They know a lot of girls are checking for them and that translates into some pretty egregious behaviour….
Or is this just tall Toronto dudes?!?
standing out in a crowd is not always a good thing. sometimes you want to blend in. also when a taller woman comes around everyone expects you holla at them because they're tall too. how bout no.
Shooottt. I'm BARELY 5'2"…only 'men' I've met that are my height are children, lol. I've dated a guy who was my height (5'4"- 5'6"ish) when I had heels on…HE had a problem with it.
I laughed the entire time I read this, because I'm six feet tall and I'm always dating short dudes. In fact, I think there's only been two men I've been involved with in my life that have been taller than me.
Funny enough, the tallest one had a tendency to pick on me – because he knew I was always chased by shorter men – and call me a "little girl" 'cause for once I could finally BE the "littler" one. LOL
I've always been a short men magnet, and I dig it. I'm almost always wearing heels – making me look 6'4/6'5" EASILY – and the ones I've dated have loved that. It works out because they treat me like some kind of trophy, LOLOL.
I just couldn't imagine being attracted to a man who gets hung up on something like that, which works out because they wouldn't be attracted to my extra tall self, anyway. LOL
LOL at a lot of the comments. A man who is 6’-4” may make you feel secure. A man with 18-inch arms will make you secure.
Like Most, I’m 5’-8”, and never had a problem with women with my height or taller. I’ve dated several 5’-7” to 5’-10” women who are over six feet in heels. I guess I’m just arrogant enough that I make her feel lucky to be with me than vice versa. I can’t complain about the hand God dealt me. I wasn't given Dwyane Wade's height, but I was given Michael Jai White's body. Technically, since average height for a US man is 5’-11” with a standard deviation of three inches, I’m average height anyway (just barely made it!)
My current girlfriend is 5’-11”, beautiful, light-skinned with long hair. I have no problem going out with her wearing four to five-inch heels, and neither does she. A lot of tall dudes look at the size of her chest and think about trying to holla. Then they look at the size of mine and reconsider. #BarbellShrug.
Lola: “I ain’t gonna front tho, I’ve seen many couples like that and I’m always curious to know how the mattress mambo functions lol #curiositykilledthecatbutnotthep*ssy lol”
Very well. I can provide references from women 5’-8” and up. Again, I can’t complain about the hand God dealt me.
"My current girlfriend is 5’-11”, beautiful, light-skinned with long hair."
**waits for the sky to fall**
lmao
You too?? I just KNEW there was gonna be a backlash behind this one.
LOL, me too. I started to comment, but just let it go. I rarely comment here, so didn't wanna start nothin'.
yeah i was wondering what light skinned and long hair had to do with height. but if he likes it, i love it.
It has to deal with stereotypes and physical ideals, which is what the whole post is about.
Tall, attractive women have their choice of men. The physical ideal for a man in this society is tall, as many women have confirmed in this post. Women with light skin and long hair is also a preference in this society.
So what is this tall, good-looking woman doing with me? To paraphrase Biggie to describe myself, "heartthrob never, short and yellow as ever!" You never know what type of partner you are limiting yourself from having by adhering to societal standards instead of finding someone that is compatible with you. I was pointing out a stupid societal standard as it relates to men and juxtaposing it next to a stupid societal standard as it relates to women. Not to mention if you are confident in what you have, you can get just about any type of partner you want.
This has nothing really to do with light-skinned women in particular, or saying that is my preference. Trust me, there is nothing like a dark-skinned woman wearing all black. Wooooo glory!
Not to mention, it's quite telling that people focused on the "light skin" and "long hair", yet completely missed the "5'-11""
Im calling #Swindle early…
lol jokes But i see your points!
I'm 5'3.5-5'4. I see few men that are shorter than me. However, I did date a guy my height and it was awkward, because I'm use to looking up. My preference is tall. Short men seem to have some huge insecurity issues.. Eh!
Well I got to say that I am baixinho aka vertically challenged aka practically a legal dwarf…I'm 5'0 so i'm sure it's not hard to see why I have a bit of a qualm with dating a guy within my height range (no suh, the devil is a liar!). All that aside though, I try not to date anyone shorter than 5'11…porque? Because I want my unborn chil'uns to have a FIGHTING chance at height!! Not that i'm planning on having any remotely soon. I don't mind being tiny, but I don't think 'tiny' men are cute. I once dated a guy that was 5'7…but with my heels on he was really too close in height to me and that is a problem. I suppose I do have a protection/'manly' complex because I like the feeling (even if it may be false lol) of standing beside someone I think can protect me. And in my head, someone taller seems to provide that sense of security that a 5 and 0 like me cannot provide to anyone lol.
I'm only 6ft in the morning. And i've dated 4'11 chicks and I've dated 6'2 chicks. I really dont care if she's talling than me in heels. Here's why: 1) Being a svelte 275lbs makes alot of ppl feel safe and prevents other dudes for trying me, 2) i'll climb any tree and 3) we're the same height laying down.
Not gonna lie, even though I'm not short, I get upset when a 5ft chick says they need a 6ft man. Its ridiculous. You're too short to be able to tell the difference between 5'9 and 6ft.
Sidenote: Its funny how height is relative. I guess I'm considered tall in the real world but when i played football i was considered undersized at 6ft 310
'I’m only 6ft in the morning" LMAO!!
Peyso: "Not gonna lie, even though I’m not short, I get upset when a 5ft chick says they need a 6ft man. Its ridiculous. You’re too short to be able to tell the difference between 5′9 and 6ft."
You're attracted to who you're attracted to, but I always thought 5'-4" women demanding a 6'-2" man was ridiculous. It's like a 230-pound woman saying a man without a six-pack is a dealbreaker.
Ppl are attracted to what they are attracted to but you cant be attracted to a number
LOL! I watched some reality dating show [BW/BM] a while back where the woman professed to only date 'pretty boy, model types' even though she was smuggling more than a few jelly rolls under her shirt. They actually fixed her up with a guy who did print/runway modeling and he basically spent the date rejecting her and giving her a taste of her own medicine.
"You’re too short to be able to tell the difference between 5′9 and 6ft."
you are absolutely right. as a short woman I considered everything "tall" for most of my teenage life. LOL. I didn't REALLY understand this over 6 foot phenomenon looked like until maybe 5 years ago. seriously. maybe its just too many "short" men where I'm from…
"i'll climb any tree"
LMAO @ this!
One more thing: I have 2 prophytes, 1 of them is my ADP. Both of them were all american wrestlers in college. They are both under 5'6. They have both put on some good weight after college. I've seen them both slam bruhz 6'3 and higher
yeah team. it's all about center of gravity. shorter people have a better center of gravity. my lb was a two time state wrestling champ in high school. he taught me a few tricks and sprawls. my record is impeccable.
I'm short and usually attract taller guys, but out of all of my friends, I'm the only one that has no problem with short guys. I don't care about height as long as you act right and the sex is good…No complaints from me.
I've dated all types, and the two shortest (5'4-5'6) were the ones who put it on me in THE worst (best) way.
Most recent was short, and kinda fat. Cute and sweet but not gonna lie, he was not at all who I was checkin for on the night we met. I fell so hard words cant describe. Since he was one of the shortest I wasn't sure what the sex would be like…Easily the best I ever had.
Lessons learned about height:
1. Its just a part of a persons overall makeup (for me) not a deal breaker
2. A mans height doesn't indicate how he will treat you or how much happier you'll be (unless you just cant get over whatever his height is or he has a severe complex).
3. Don't underestimate short guys*(in the bedroom or otherwise)
***Maybe its karma for not being initially attracted, but short and fat kinda played me out a little. All I could think was… wait a second, did this plus sized keebler elf just try to play me???!!!!
***Maybe its karma for not being initially attracted, but short and fat kinda played me out a little. All I could think was… wait a second, did this plus sized keebler elf just try to play me???!!!!
___________________
Phaaa.
Subscribing to comments… gotta read this at work!
Women are attracted to traits we deem masculine, just as men are attracted to traits that are deemed feminine. For women, one of those things is height. You don't have to like, but is what it is.
I'm 5' 7, and I am naturally attracted to height. That doesn't mean I've never dated a man my height. It means I am more inclined to be physically attracted to a man I can look up to. That can be anywhere from 5' 9 to 6' 9.
If you are a 5' 7 man, and you routinely date women shorter than you, than why are you concerned about the preference of taller women? You are tall to the women you date, so get over it.
*sniggles loudly* and there it is, lol
and there it is. let the masses know.
Oh boy! I feel the need to post again. Some short females prefer tall guys. Its not shallow nor is it taking the tall guys away from the tall girls, blah blah blah. If a tall guy wants a tall girl he'll be with her. If he's with me, clearly he wants sumthin short & cute. Funny how people keep mentioning how short guys can fight better, etc. I personally couldn't care less b/c its the sense of security a tall man provides not actual protection (that's what the 40 cal is for homie). As for the bedroom the tall guys I've dated were def not lacking there either so hey! There are plenty of dudes that prefer big tits &/or booties on a chick. I don't fall into either of those categories but you don't see me saying things like "well is that big booty chick as smart as me? Is her hair as long?" Because I don't need to take up or make up for what God has given (or not given) me. Like some posters stated, confidence is key. That is all & I'll ALWAYS like em tall! Lol
I approve this statement. I think you're spot on. I think folks are attracted to what they're attracted to.
I never take offense to girls only date past (insert height taller than mine) because, I have my own things that are deal breakers. Personally, I've never been able to date a big girl. I see some, and think they're awesome, smart, and gorgeous, but, the attraction is never there for me. I feel bad about it sometimes. I imagine height is the same way, for some. You're attracted to what you're attracted to.
"Personally, I’ve never been able to date a big girl. I see some, and think they’re awesome, smart, and gorgeous, but, the attraction is never there for me. I feel bad about it sometimes."
this is exactly how i feel. only thing is i don't feel bad about it. *shrug*
Your comment is so much different from what I hear. I think there is a huge difference between a 5ft woman saying "I only date tall guys" and "i only date guys over 6ft". One is a number that doesnt really mean anything and the other is very specific to you as a person
Well in my 1st post I explained my reasoning for my preference (not that any1 should have to explain their preference but…) Height is relative to the person. I prefer tall guys & since I'm almost 5'4 people would say that a 5'9 guy is tall. Well not in my opinion, so I guess that's where the specific # comes from. Someone also stated that a short girl preferring a tall man is like a fat chick requiring a dude have a 6 pack. I sooo beg to differ. A short girl can't help being short nor can a short guy, however a fat girl can lose weight. With that being said she better not have that requirement until she tones up her damn self! Btw I am not single & have never had trouble getting a man so I'm not "missing out on my blessings" because I prefer tall gentlemen. Besides preferences are just that, preferences. You can't help who you end up falling for. Sidebar: I find myself always agreeing with TheMostInterestingManInTheWorld :).
Someone also stated that a short girl preferring a tall man is like a fat chick requiring a dude have a 6 pack. I sooo beg to differ. A short girl can’t help being short nor can a short guy, however a fat girl can lose weight. With that being said she better not have that requirement until she tones up her damn self!
Which was exactly the point I was making. I wasn't referring to whether you can change your condition or not.
You're always pretty on point yourself… there Hebrew Princess.
BTW, I've always wondered, is that name literal?
Most of the women here are shallow.
as.
hell.
Its hard enough being fucking 5' 5". Its like the most reason I have to be attractive is my potential career choice.
Why do I have to suffer? Its hard enough to be naturally attractive. Its so depressing.
#youmad?
why shouldn't I be?
tall dudes most of the time aren't ANY different. I've seen dudes that are much taller with no personality that pull women while the worthy people are left out to dry
Should ugly ppl feel the same way? Fat ones? Ppl w/ horrible injuries that have made them ridiculously unattractive?
If its really that bad, its probably you #noshots
i promise i was just about to type this. he seems really affected.
Well it does beg the question….Are our so called preferences genetic or learned? Cause if they are learned than our preferences really are just shallow grasps at conformity.
Anecdote: I know plenty of dudes that will sex a big girl and be friends but won't publicly date her. You rarely hear any many admit he has a preference for big girls. But plenty of men do. But in public we say "I prefer slim women," cause it conforms with what society expects. 200 years ago no white women would admit they liked black men. Do you really think that was preference? Or just conforming.
So yeah, if preferences are learned I think we do need to examine our motivations.
i remember reading a study in the uk carried out by scientists…on genetics as a driving force for fertility cues…thus it looked at what made for better potential mates
think it said something like taller men were deemed more sexually attractive but in contrast, shorter women appeared to have greater reproductive success partly because the fertility of tall women is reduced/delayed as a result of their bodies spending more energy on growing…how men are genetically pre-disposed to know this i do not know…fellas do u?!
so yeah here tall men (6 ft) and short women were, the less likely to be single or childless than an average men (5 ft 10) and an average women (5ft 3)
i guess i'm considered too tall at just under 5ft 8 and with 5 inch heels on i'm apparently a freak #gofigure
short girls are actually better for chex.
There size makes them easier to man handle and split open. They only draw back is they have to be on something for doggy or you have to bend your knees to get in there and lose stroke speed and power.
She has to either bend over all the way (losing leverage) or you can put her on something (like make her stand on text books).
But most you can really get in small girls and toss them around, hold them down to get the best angles. They are fun to pick up and when they ride you you get a better feeling.
@Cheekz did you say Text book?!!
Im done!
You have to have some use for those expensive ass books after you are done with classes, right?
See, CHeeKZ, this is the talent I was mentioning the other day :).
@Streetz.. you know I aint go to class my ninja
@Sane. I have alot more talents to show you sweetie.
It's not that they're shallow, they just have their preferences. I'm willing to bet you do too.
I think this is yet another reason why some women complain that there are no "good" men out there. If we add height as a reason to not date someone, we have crossed out a great number of quality brothas. I used to be narrow minded and think it was a wrap for short dudes, until I met an incredible short guy. He is taller than me–I am only 5'1 but he is still short in society's eyes. The thing is he treats me better than all of these so called tall men with short characters. He is stronger and more athetic than most dudes. Let's jump out of our boxes and stop limiting ourselves.
Although I understand what you're saying, this is always funny/ironic to me coming from a short person.
I mean seriously. Just read through this post. I always thought the magic number was 6'0. Turns out half these sisters are looking for 6'2 and 6'4.
OK. Next time you are the club count all the dudes that are over 6'0 and all the dudes under 6'0. You'll get a pretty good picture at how many options you have dismissed.
Yes that is what I am saying, we dismiss quality cuz we are looking for the top 5 percent, and forgetting about 95% of the other men out there. Every woman wants a Denzel when there is only one of him and he has been taken. LOL. We need to look for quality and someone who we will have a healthy, nurturing, spiritually grounded relationship with. Not just a tall dude who may treat you like crap.
Let’s jump out of our boxes and stop limiting ourselves.
Easy to say for you… you are dating a "tall" man.
I was just going to say something about your Kelly Rowland picture throwing me off again, and then you switched it up on me. LOL
I will say this though… for the record… If you're a guy under 6ft and you're having trouble getting women. Don't blame it on your height. It's probably because you're lame.
Or, maybe you just don't know how to play to your strengths. If you're not tall… you need to be super engaging. When you open your mouth you need to be Moses, Barack Obama, Jay-Z and Chris Rock all rolled into 1. Women need to hang on your every word.
Another important thing is to keep good posture. If you're not tall, don't slouch. Men in general, should keep their shoulders back and their spine straight, but, if you're not tall, don't walk with your shoulders forward and your head down.
Next, you need to be in shape, dressed impeccably and well groomed at all times. Short is one thing, short and fat is another thing altogether. Short, fat with no style, an unkempt philly beard and lint in your hair – no chance whatsoever.
Lastly, play to your strengths. Just accept the fact that you're not gonna be the type to pull brand new chicks out the club on most friday/saturday nights. Understand that you excel by talking. If you're like 5'9 and below, chances are, most chicks aren't gonna look at you and think, "damn, I wanna lick the sweat off this dude tonight". So, if you're in a spot with loud music where, you can't talk and verbally put her on to your non-immediately-visible awesomeness – and you see someone you like, don't try to dance with her, because she'd rather dance with the 6'3 guy over there. Instead, say something witty in passing and keep it moving. Later on, when she's at the bar… and can actually hear you talk – then go in.
Or, avoid the "club scene" all together if you're looking to bag something. Those are away games. Only go if someone's having a party and you're going to be able to have fun with people you know, and people who already know you and all your awesomeness. Besides that,if you're tryna go out, work the lounges in the winter and then the BBQ circuit in the summer. Those are all home games.
Package this and publish this for your bol theory please
I would say the same thing toward anybody who is not the "A-typical" type of attractive. If you're kind of a fat boy. It's the same thing. If you're face isn't really that handsome – same thing. Everybody should always play to their strength.
"Short, fat with no style, an unkempt philly beard and lint in your hair – no chance whatsoever."
iDied.
ITA with the entire post!
I cosign this whole comment. No one is perfect, everyone is lacking in some area. Use what you have. Even a tall guy will take an L if nothing but nonsense and lameness is coming out of his mouth.
Hilarious…but alot of truth in this post~
All this advice for men who are not tall is all good and everything, but it's also a word to the wise of everyone not just short men.
How does a man pull women? Immaculate Swag. Define Swag. It's how you carry yourself. It's that simple.
I get squeezed, chased, and hugged a little too long for comfort in the club. I have about 30 some odd pages of my honesty box on facebook of women who either know me and secretly crush on me, or who don't know me, but want to get to know me because "they seen me around."
I put it to you like this that quote, "5'9 with the soul of a 6'4 aggin" is from Clifford Harris. I been in the club with this guy and several NBA athletes and not a single one of those ladies wanted any of those 6'6 guys in the club.
I agree… TI plays it well. What I'm saying in the advice is useful for anybody. The point of it is – when you're not tall, when women first make eye contact – it's like 1 strike. You're already behind in the count, so, you need to make the most of the next few pitches.
But yea… I feel where you're coming from, we've never really ran together but you should have at least heard a little something about me. I've never had issues with ladies… just tryna help those less fortunate.
"If you’re a guy under 6ft and you’re having trouble getting women. Don’t blame it on your height. It’s probably because you’re lame."
real talk
Yep, definitely have to agree with this entire comment. Some guys aim TOO high. It's nothing wrong with being confident, but you have to know what works for you, what you're confident in and use it to your full advantage.
Most: “Lastly, play to your strengths. Just accept the fact that you’re not gonna be the type to pull brand new chicks out the club on most friday/saturday nights.”
One more comment on this: If you play to your strengths, almost anything can be overlooked. I was talking to a 6’-3” chick at the gym, and she spoke about how she only dates taller men. However, I knew she was feeling me anyway, although she knew I had a woman. She asks how tall I am, I tell her five-eight, and she says, “no way, I thought you were five-ten or five-eleven!” I’m like, get outta here, you know I aint no damn five-eleven! But other attractive traits can make you grow like Apache Chief. Inuk Chuk!
Women and Men a question:
What height is considered "Short"?
At 5'4, a short man to me is 5'3 and below. I'm more than okay with a man my height, if he is okay with not towering above me. Although at 5'4, you'd think he'd have gotten used to that kind of thing by now.
Being 5'9, any man shorter than that is short to me.
In the US (you have to specify country) I think below 5'7 is like, really short. 5'9 and below is short, 5'10 to 6'0 is average, and 6'1 and above is tall.
in the uk, 'tall men' do not equal the same thing as the tall men i see in america…tall here is probably 6ft and above….short is probably about 5'6 or shorter…
i'm just under 5'8 so i consider anybody shorter than me short
Average height for a black man living in the US is 5'-10".
Average height for a black woman living in the US is 5'-4-1/2".
Always on the same page w/ my Hugh 🙂
According to stats alone, in the US average height for a man is 5ft 9.75, for women 5ft 4.5.
So short would be less than that?
This is getting dumb quick…
If the average height for a man is 5'10, then normal height would be considered 5'8-6' tall. Above average would be 6'-6'4, and anything above that would be an outlier. 5'8-5'4 would be below average, and anything below would be an outlier.
Height Count
5'3" 1
5'4" 3
5'5" 4
5'6" 6
5'7" 7
5'8" 12
5'9" 17
5'10" 17
5'11" 12
6' 7
6'1" 6
6'2" 4
6'3" 3
6'4" 1
This is a table of 100 men randomly samples in the US.
i think streetz was asking what you personally considered short. not as in statistics.
OK,
So from what is being said, you've used four factors:
1) Geographic Location
2) Race
3) height Perception
4) Statistical information
I would say that #3 is the most widely used for everyone. I say that because Sea Sea (my homie in the story) would always call me "short" although we're the same height(shes 75% joking). Also, I've had everyone say that I'm anywhere from 5ft 10 to 6 ft 2, all based on their knowledge and perception.
The stats are logical and factual, but who carries a tape measure, an abicus (sp), and has "an app for that" to calculate your height? Logic doesn't always reign supreme.
Also, #1 to me would be the next factor. In a world of blind people, the man with one eye is king. A country/area with mostly short men/people (5ft – 5ft 4 lets say) someone 5ft 7 would be considered Manut Bol!
I say this to say we need to realize that outside factors, aside from stats, govern our perception of height.
QED
Any other factors?
I'm around 5'5ish…so, anything shorter than me…is short..but, I said I would give a short brotha a chance..but, like MOST said he would have to play to his strengths….
Short is my height 5'2"
from my perspective for a woman i would say anything under 5'5 and for a man anything under 6'0.
"What height is considered “Short”?"
It's relative, ain't it? Short is below your height. *kanyeshrug*
But in general?
Short = Kirk Franklin
Lmao. Amen to that. And Kirk Franklin is still taller than me! So I don't know that I can agree that short is below my height since short IS my height and a 5'5 man is STILL hella short to me.
The consensus from the women is that men should just suck it up and deal with it. "You like who you like".
My question is: if we replaced tall w/ light skinned, would women feel the same way?
*three snaps in a circle*
"My question is: if we replaced tall w/ light skinned, would women feel the same way?"
In theory, I would agree with you. But that situation has so much more dynamic tied into it, both with internal and external forces as well as across racial lines…it's not the same thing, IMO. It's interesting that you didn't say, replace tall w/ dark-skinned. #justsayin
"In theory, I would agree with you. But that situation has so much more dynamic tied into it, both with internal and external forces as well as across racial lines…it’s not the same thing, IMO."
Is it exaclty analogous? Naw. But is it close enough for a comparison? Yep. All of our "preferences" are determined/influenced by external forces. There's a reason that there arent many short people (especially men) in media and when they are, media either attempts to make em look taller or make them take the funny Kevin Hart role.
"It’s interesting that you didn’t say, replace tall w/ dark-skinned. #justsayin" – I dont think its interesting at all. Had I done that, the analogy wouldnt have been… well, analogous. I compared a perceived preference to another perceived preference
u really hit it out the park with this one Peyso.
"u really hit it out the park with this one Peyso." – Cheekz Money
"Pause" – Gus Johnson
The Commisioner's office and the Players Association met and decided we could not let this one go.
#Allthepauses
Yep!
Seriously though, men definitely have preferences and a lot are focused on things women can't change about themselves and we are always basically told to get over it. Besides, for the taller women having preferences for taller men, there are clearly practical reasons behind it. I'm not even going there in regards to the short women.
Cool. I'm going to save this one for the next time that discussion comes up
Peyso, I'm light-skinned, so it wouldn't bother me in the least. I am not speaking for any other women on here. The light-skint issue bugs me. Why does it got to be because I'm light-skinned that I get more attention? ON the other hand, I understand where the darker ladies are coming from. Some of the most beautiful women I've ever seen are have darker-skinned, but when "beauty" is in the media, it's rarely dark. I think the comparison is similar, but again, MOST of the women looking for tall men are tall themselves. It's more than just an attraction thing, it's the aesthetics, ergonomics, etc. There are practicial reasons, whereas I can't think of one practical reason that a man would prefer lighter women.
@ Sane
"The light-skint issue bugs me. Why does it got to be because I’m light-skinned that I get more attention?" – For the same reason tall dudes do. Its "preference"
"ON the other hand, I understand where the darker ladies are coming from." – I'm not short so I dont have a personal issue. I just feel for the short bols.
"Some of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen are have darker-skinned, but when “beauty” is in the media, it’s rarely dark." – Or short.
"MOST of the women looking for tall men are tall themselves." = Most of the dudes on here dont have a problem with this, at least I dont. I do have a problem with a 5ft chick demanding a 6'2 dude.
"It’s more than just an attraction thing, it’s the aesthetics, ergonomics, etc. There are practicial reasons, whereas I can’t think of one practical reason that a man would prefer lighter women." – I can create reasons why someone would date light skinned girls only. They feel its aesthetically pleasing. They feel that their skins contrast/match in a way that makes for better pictures, etc. I say this to disprove the notion
@Peyso
"For the same reason tall dudes do. Its “preference”. -I've yet to hear the term "tall-points".
"I’m not short so I dont have a personal issue. I just feel for the short bols." I feel for 'em too, then I remember that these same men may be the first to discount a woman because of a gap in her teeth, her hair, her shoes, etc.
"Or short" – To this I say: T.I., Micheal Ealy, Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Leo DiCaprio are all under 6'0 and considered some of the sexiest men on earth (the first two are my personal choices).
"Most of the dudes on here dont have a problem with this, at least I dont. I do have a problem with a 5ft chick demanding a 6′2 dude." – I think we're on the same page here.
"I can create reasons why someone would date light skinned girls only. They feel its aesthetically pleasing. They feel that their skins contrast/match in a way that makes for better pictures, etc. I say this to disprove the notion" – The reasons you've put up here are more to do with how they appear, whereas the practical reasons I'm referring to are more concerning how it makes the woman feel or physically being uncomfortable. Those are still different situations to me.
For me yes and Imma just gon head and co-sign Sane85, it's a preference.
Folk can't help being whatever complexion any more than they can help being whatever height. We are all shallow about something, we just put a nice ring to it and call it a preference…one man's preference is another shallowness.
*another's*
haha. i remember you asked this on twitter. i don't have a height preference. i'm taller than maybe 95% of the women i've personally come across so i don't have to worry about dating a woman taller than me.
the reason i said candace parker is because i met her a couple years ago at UT's homecoming. she is simply beautiful and we are at about eye level. i might have her by maybe an inch. in heels she would be taller than me.
i would date a woman as short at 5'1 and as tall as 6'0. the only thing about dating a really short woman is that some s*xual positions are harder to pull off because of the drastic height difference.
i guess my ideal height would be somewhere between 5'7-5'9.
I had to comment on this post (long time reader 1st time poster). I am only 5’6 maybe 5’7 on a good day and I have this conversation with ppl all the time. I agree with everyone who said you attracted to what you are attracted to. If I was to come up to you at a bar/club and try to talk to you and u automatically count me out becuz im not 6 feet that’s a problem (especially if u 5’6). I don’t have the napoleon complex or anything but just becuz dude is 6’4 doesn’t mean that he will protect you better than me. Oh and I have dated women between 5’2 -6’2 I don’t discriminate. Check list are the reason a lot of WOMEN and MEN are still single today…
Sane, Please do the honors
See, and I read your comment a while ago too. I guess I was too distracted by my convo with Peyso to remember to go back and welcome you to commenting*. Thanks for getting my attention, Streetz.
I'm with you on checklists being a reason why a lot of people are still single (not always the case though). I try to keep my "checklist" to a minimum (I've got four basic requirements) and if I'm feeling you, I'm feeling you. Once something is put in my mind as an issue, I will not be able to get it out of there and it will take more mental effort to overcome. For instance, there was a post up about age not to long ago, and when I met a guy 13 yrs old, it's all I could think about when before I wouldn't have stressed on it.
*I am very, very curious as to what keeps people from commenting, maybe you could enlighten me. Sometimes I envision all of us having a discussion in a room made of windows and a whole lot of people staring at us like we're in a an aquarium.
Thanks Sane!
Kev welcome, thanks for the comment, and stop lurkin nukka!
Sane, I was gonna give you another Yellow card, but you'll just get a normal "falta" for now..lol
I'm mad that you gave me the first yellow card and I didn't know about it. I don't even know what I did :(.
Or, avoid the “club scene” all together if you’re looking to bag something.
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This is funny. I've known this for years. Clubs are horrible for short dudes cause all the women have on heals. Women that would normally be shorter than you look like they are taller than you.
People who subscribe to the school of thought that tall is a preference are the same people who condone light skin, long hair, good hair, light eyes, big breasts, muscular, big butts, etc. preferences.
Beware — A lot of you have described complexes and not preferences. A preference is what you prefer, more likely to find attractive, but not absolute. A complex is when you unequivocally disqualify a type. Meaning if you say, I only date men 6' and taller. You have a complex, you have disqualified every thing below 6'. Now if you want to get mad at the man with the light skin complex then maybe you should think twice.
Of course someone will say something about how race and height are completely different. And i'll ask a question like, "Do you think height complexes or skin complexes have been around longer?" And then i'll say, "Don't worry, i'll wait."
You said it better than I did. Calling something a preference is a cop out. What are your motivations for your preference is the real question.
But then some people are incapable of self analysis.
I'm reading a lot of women saying that they are checking for the taller man, but quite a bit of those women are also saying that they have or would date a shorter man. So, most of these women are stating preferences. As far as those women stating that it is a requirement, I mostly agree. I still don't think we should be discounting anybody unequivocally when we are talking about find love.
@Dr. J
Well said, and I agree.
As a female that is the same height as your friend, I have to totally agree. I cannot date a man shorter than me. It just doesn't feel right. A lot of my friends say I am missing out on great guys, and to them I say tell me you have no preferences and I'll shut up. Always complete silence at that point. I don't have a problem finding tall men so I feel no need to compromise on this.
Yeah, all I ask is that he's taller than me when I'm in heels. I'm 5'3'' so that ain't askin' much. And I'm not a
hookerextremely-high heels type of chick anyway.So, don't fret taller ladies, I ain't tryin' to take your extra tall men! I actually feel for ya…ya'll have a much narrow gap in terms of availability. I support you. #sisterhood
LOL I agree, I just want to be able to put on my freakum pumps and not tower over him.
@Hugh Jazz: I think I see where you were going with that comment but my disagreement was in the fact that it seems like you were saying a short girl shouldn't be saying she wants a tall guy because she's not tall (correct me if I'm wrong). I don't see being a short female as being unattractive or "bad" but many people see being fat as being unattractive or "bad". That's the difference. I don't want to be tall so I feel I can still as a short woman say I want a tall man. A fat person should want to be fit (for health reasons if nothing else) so her wanting someone who is in excellent shape is a bit much until she herself gets in shape. But hey just my opinion. Btw, I feel the need to point out that shorter men are more attractive to me in the looks department BUT I'd take a taller less cute dude. Don't shoot! I'm just bring truthful! Lol
It's also funny how women are saying, he just got to be taller than me when i'm in heels. Woman, you ain't even that tall!
"Oh yeah, i'm not that tall, but you got to be taller than me. The bar is set higher for you than for me."
#typical
So a perfect dude get's tossed aside over some shoes. That's freakin sad.
Not by me. I mean I can't do anyone shorter than 5-4. I want my kids to have a fighting chance…but a good man is something to hold on to, so I'd work it out.
Preferences are no absolutes…they are likes/desires…we don't always get or NEED what we want.
"It’s also funny how women are saying, he just got to be taller than me when i’m in heels. Woman, you ain’t even that tall!"
Dude, you have no idea how much difference a few inches make. ESPECIALLY the higher heels ya'll seem to favor. I mean, check it, most of the time we're out with the nicca, we're probably gonna be in heels. And pictures will be taken. Step-stool jokes galore.
"Dude, you have no idea how much difference a few inches make. "
that's what she said….
So interesting, my friends and I have the height convo all of the time. I'm a tall chick, 5'9 to 5'10 ish, and I have always been uncomfortable dating guys my height or shorter. I usually only go for guys 6'2 and taller because that's what I'm attracted to. Like some of the other women have said, it's awkward enough when I have to bend down for pictures with my friends….don't want to have to do that with my man too.
I don't wear heels often (flat feet, so heels are terribly painful). But when I do, it's weird to tower over a guy. I too like the comfort and security of a taller man. Not that I discriminate against shorter guys (I've dated them but it usually doesn't go very far because I'm so conscious and aware of it). I usually try to sit down ALL of the time with them, so no walking in the park, or something similar. After awhile it just doesn't work. Maybe that's why I'm still single (message, lol), but I can admit this one flaw.
When I wear tall heels I'm at least 6'1. Now put the mental image in your head of me trying to bend down to hug or kiss a guy that is like 5'8 (like 5 inches shorter)…no bueno!
Some slight exaggerrating going on. I keep seein girls say, "I'm 5'9 or 5'10 and I can't be bendin down……." "He has to be taller than me…."
OK you 5'9 and 5'8. You wouldn't even have to adjust your neck to kiss me. 🙂 In heals the difference is still only about 3 or 4 inches. No effort required to kill or take pictures.
I give a range and say 5'9 – 5'10, because the last time I was measured by a doctor (years ago) he said I was 5'9. But for some reason when I meet a dude and he says he is 5'9, he's usually shorter than me.
Or a dude who says he's 5'11. but isn't taller than me. So either I am underestimating my height, or men measure themselves differently and are overestimating, lol.
Nonetheless, it's not bad when I'm shoeless. But putting on shoes and even be the same height is awkward, so it's really awkward if the shoes make me inches taller. Again we all have our preferences (or complezes) and this is one I am willing to admit to.
I co-sign and find that a lot of men OVERestimate, LOL….
My father is actually about 5'11 ( & 3/4 let him tell it), so he "rounds up" to 6'0, LOL….
I believe my SO is only 5'11 too, but he says 6'0, so I roll with it. Not that serious to even debate it…
Welcome, miss lady!
"I usually try to sit down ALL of the time with them, so no walking in the park, or something similar. After awhile it just doesn’t work. Maybe that’s why I’m still single (message, lol), but I can admit this one flaw."
I've got this dating montage (like in the romcoms) of you having entire relationships where you avoid standing next to the person and always try to be sitting down. It's pretty hilarious actually, I wish I could post it. I also love the Don't Be A Menace callback. Nobody gets it when I say MESSAGE!
@Most….: well the Hebrew part is (I'm a Hebrew Isrealite). The princess part is what I consider myself to be lol.
This is interesting for me… I think this is the closest I've ever come to 'knowing' an Isrealite. Bout to get my wikipedia on and find out more about you…
You seen an Isrealite before. They in time square jonin on every non african that walks buy with a bullhorn and Parliment Funkadelic outfits.
That's why I said "known". We all have seen them. I didn't wanna be stereotypical though because Princess doesn't seem like the bullhorn carrying type. That's why I'm gonna do some wikipedia research.
This way, should I ever meet someone like princess… who happens to be a non-bullhorn having Isrealite, I'll have something intelligent to say.
It’s also funny how women are saying, he just got to be taller than me when i’m in heels. Woman, you ain’t even that tall!
_____________________
Phaaa. That's what I'm sayin. Like a tall women to me is over 5'10. So 5'11 and up.
There was this doc on BBC a while back and they were basically discussing what attracts men and women to each other. Anyway, they asked a room full of women to create their ideal man (aesthetically) on a computer. The scientists predicted that most of the women would create this super-muscular guy, but what they found was that most women preferred a tall man vs. a muscular man.
I am 5’2 and I have dated men between the heights of 5’7 and 6’3. I like to wear heels and when I do, I’m some where between 5’6 and 5’7 (depending on how high the heel is) and my rule is that the man should be at least a couple of inches taller than me when I have heels on, making him 5’9 and up.
I have always loved a tall (5’11 +) man, and for the most part, its just something about the way he walks and the air of confidence he gives off. Its just SO sexy! Its actually the first thing I notice about a man… Then his face, then his shoes… And then I work my way back up…
I do kinda feel sorry for shorter men though because, being a man in this society is hard enough and people constantly judging them based off of something they cannot control… Ehh… Not really good.
I will say this though, from the few shorter men I have dated, I will say what they lack in height, they tend to make up in other areas.. And well… I don’t think I have to go into much detail on that 🙂
Women are shallow gold diggers. Scientific proof. 🙂
CHARLOTTE OBSERVER — "A forthcoming study by a Duke University researcher and several colleagues confirms what not-so-thin women and short, broke men have long suspected: They don't get nearly as much romantic attention as skinny women and tall, financially secure guys.
With the $1.1 billion online dating and matchmaking industry growing in popularity, researchers say dating sites' gigantic databases make fertile ground for study. The study, still under peer review before publication, analyzed 22,000 online daters and found that women put a premium on income and height when deciding which men to contact, said Dan Ariely, a Duke behavioral economist who worked with University of Chicago researchers on the project.
For example, the study showed a 5-foot-9-inch man needs to make $30,000 more than a 5-foot-10-inch one to be as successful in the dating pool."
"Women are shallow gold diggers. Scientific proof."
Women dig for gold, men dig for T&A. We all gets paid at the end of the day. Baddabingbaddaboom.
According to that survey….a man can be a midget and still pull dimes as long as his pockets are swole.
I don't think they neede to do a survey. Lil Wayne proves this theory every day. 🙂
LOL…as long as everyone knows their role….
I know, right?! lol
"For example, the study showed a 5-foot-9-inch man needs to make $30,000 more than a 5-foot-10-inch one to be as successful in the dating pool.”
Wait, a one-inch height difference necessitates a $30K increase in income? Can anyone really tell if a guy is five-nine or five-ten just by looking at him? You can differ by a foot in height depending on what kind of shoes you wear.
its probably more like 5'9 and 5'11-6'0. most people can't see the distinction of just one inch. no way. I do believe most men that lie about being 5'11 are really more like 5'9 barefoot though….
I'm hella late…but oh well, I will be heard.
I prefer men that are 3 to 4 inches taller than me. I like the idea of looking up to my man, and I do wear heels 75% of the time. That being said, I'm 5-4. So I'm not asking for the world.
That is my preference. I've dated men the same height as me, and had one tasty gent that was 6-5. All of my friends that were taller than me we pissed. Called me selfish and what not. Whatever, I rode that thing until the wheels fell off. Twas fun. 🙂
"All of my friends that were taller than me we pissed. Called me selfish and what not. Whatever, I rode that thing until the wheels fell off. Twas fun."
hahaha. word. and you know I feel you…
That’s why I said “known”. We all have seen them. I didn’t wanna be stereotypical though because Princess doesn’t seem like the bullhorn carrying type. That’s why I’m gonna do some wikipedia research.
This way, should I ever meet someone like princess… who happens to be a non-bullhorn having Isrealite, I’ll have something intelligent to say.
____________________________
I actually enjoy watching them crush bammas with knowledge.
The thing I never understood about the Isrealites that stand on corners talking to people is that, traditional Judaism is not evangelical. I think most Jewish folk view themselves as part of 1 big family of people, so, they're not really looking to bring other people into that family. They are God's chosen ppl. Israelites consider themselves descendants of Hagar, which would make them sort of like the prodigal stepchild of that family, still, no reason to be all evangelical. Would love to hear Princess' perspective on it though…
I thought the Ishmaelites or Arabic people were descendants of Hagar and the Israelites were descendants of Isaac via Jacob.
#noshots My experiences w/ them have been that they take a little bit of knowledge, make some crazy conclusions and then wrap it in rhetoric. Maybe i'm just meeting the radical ones though.
I've never met a woman Israelite
I'm a proud 4'11" 1/2. I've never been one to subscribe to the height B.S. because frankly, EVERYONE is taller than I am. Like my god son who is only seven is already at my chin. I say get over it. Neither one of my parents are tall but somehow my brother is almost 6 ft. Genes shmenes. I think height skips a generation anyway so all y'all looking for tall kids are going about it the wrong way. My fiance is just a little taller than me and weighs a good 10 lbs less than I do (he's slim build with stupid muscles and I lift digustingly heavy weights) but he could whoop my ass without even trying.
There you go Andrienne…
Side bar, is your mom's name Andrea and your dad's name Adrian? Or maybe, your mom's Andrea or Adrian, and your dad's Andrew? Just never heard the name Andrienne, trying to figure out if it's combo. Either way – I like…
I'll touch on the Isrealite subject by telling you guys exactly what I tell everyone else that has only seen the bullhorn carrying Isrealites. We are not Jews & all of us do not preach. Just as there are Christians that go to church & praise their God without forcing their beliefs on others there are Isrealites like that as well. What you see in Times Square, on Jamaica Ave, etc is NOT the norm when it comes to Isrealites. Its the exception. Just like there are people of different faiths that tell people they're going to hell if they don't convert. I'm sure all people of that faith aren't going around saying that to people. I have my beliefs & I don't judge people for theirs. Our way of life (not religion) is way too deep for 1 post tho. But thanks for trying to open your minds a bit & not condemning me right away! 🙂
I had a feeling I was meeting the radicals!! Maybe one day you should write a post though
wait.. I'm late b/c I was on threeways all day.
How did we get into talking about Jews?
I never thought the hebrew princess was actually hebrew… wow I'm slow.
I had a lengthy debate with an Israelite brotha on the corner in Philly one day…..it was quite interesting. Neither of us was backing down..so, finally my bus arrived or I would've stood there rappin' all night…
I love a good debate!
I knew already that they were radicals, I just don't get why they feel the need to be evangelical about a non-evangelical religion. I guess you can't reason with unreasonable people, regardless of their faith, or sect of a faith.
But yeah, I was able to find a pretty good amount of info on the net. I feel more than prepared should I meet someone like Princess (a non radical Black Hebrew).
Alas, were Princess and I both single, a love between us would never work. I couldn't date a non-christian, and she couldn't date someone my height. Hypothetically, it sucks being that we seem to agree on so many other things… lol.
I didn't think she was with the Parliment Isrealites. Like someone said. I never seen any women with them. What women would want to hear that ish all day. 🙂
The bullhorn ones kick a lot of knowledge but they can be very racist and they disrespect people often…..But it's still funny.
I prefer a tall man for security purposes. I was once in a relationship with a man fairly close to my height (I am 5 ft. 3 in.) and I was concerned that I would be the one to defend both of us if something went down. I had zero confidence in his ability to protect me/him/us. Besides, after a while, he began to display tendencies that caused me to believe he would actually RUN the other way if someone came at us. That relationship did not last long.
My husband is 6 ft. 5 and I don't even think about defending us if someone tries to attack us.
Was your man Kevin Hardey? His whole act is about bein short and not fightin. 🙂
The "protection" excuse is the lamest of all. We're not in the caveman days. Who even fights fairly these days? Fist to fist is long gone. Tall dudes are cut down by bullets and knives on the regular. One of my good friends was a linebacker back in the day. He had this girl who was a friend. Her boyfriend, who was smaller than the linebacker, was beatin' her. She calls up the linebacker to straighten dude out. When the linebacker shows up, the boyfriend shoots him in the chest, killing him. So much for the "protection" his size would have provided.
Just admit you buy into the media's concept of beauty. Don't hide behind lame excuses. Because a couple of bullets negates the "protection" you tout pretty quickly. My friend died trying to be some woman's "protection". Damn that.
@ Hugh Jazz: u r correct & @Peyso: maybe I will 1 day
@ Most….: lol. You are too funny! 🙂
random: my father is 5'8" and my mother is 5'4". i'm 6'6". for all short women who want to marry a tall man for the sake of their children's height, all hope is not lost if you end up with a shorty.
Correct!
Both of my parent's are considered short and my brother is 6'2"!! The genes do reach back. So, don't go in thinking you know what your kids height and complexions will be based on the father/mother dna……..
Ur Grandparents mustve been Giants!
nope. as far as i know no one in my family is over 6'1". maybe i was switched at birth. *shrug*
Exactly what I was thinking…my mom is 5'3, my father is 5'11-6'0, I'm 5'9 and my brother is about 6'1 or 6'2, so it's not always an indicator based on the parents…
I have the same issue, both my parents are 5'6 and I have 2 sisters and I'm the only one this height 5'10. I get my height from my grandparents on my mom's side, who were both above 6 feet.
You really don't know. My dad is 6'-0". My mom is 5'-6". I'm 5'-8". My brother is 6'-3". It's a crap shoot.
As a woman who is barely 5'4", I have no room to judge on height. Short, medium, tall… Luv'em all! (As long as you're not CRAZY) lol.
Btw… Icannot.com with @lastofthebest's retirement plan. That is all. LOL
Wait, where's @lastofthebest on here Mika?
I took his Twitter comment and put it at the end of the blog. Scroll up cousin!
How is treating a man worse because he's short different to treating him worse because he's black?
Welcome Tyrone (another poster with my sibling's name)!
I don't think anyone is saying to treat the shorter men badly, unless you equate not dating/giving up the goods to treating people badly and/or racism. This is no different than you not giving Shaniqua with 5 kids (3 baby daddies) a chance. She can't exactly get rid of her kids, but it's not your thing to date women with 5 children.
No man, it's nothing like that. Shaniqua made choices to have kids, I made no choices to be black or short. The point is, short men face discrimination across the board, across the whole of society – in the workplace, in media, in politics. The dating is just the tip of the iceberg, but it's where short men feel it most personally.
The good news is, some women is bigots, and some women isn't. At least you won't end up with a bigot!
You're right about Shaniqua, it was more of a choice.
Oh, well we aren't discussing mistreating short men out in the rest of the world. We are talking about short men in relation to dating, and I don't think it can be compared to actual racism. Besides, there have been plenty of people here who have stated they won't date outside their race, and while I don't agree with them, I don't think it's out-n-out racism. That word is a little too strong when talking about dating and individuals' tastes.
Either way, I don't stress over height, so I guess I'm no bigot 🙂
Sidenote: SBM is getting VSB-level number of comments. I see ya'll!!! *proud*
yeah i noticed that as well.
I had to comment on this because while I was checking for a new VSB post I noticed that as of 9:41pm PST, the two sites were tied for comments and I wanted to change that.
Well as a tall female 5'10, and because I'm slim, people think i'm taller than that. I will say that I prefer a man who is taller than me, especially since I like to wear heels. On a day when im going to work or the club, I'm probably more like 6'2/6'3. My last SO was shorter than me and it bothered me non stop. He claims it never bothered him, but a few times other guys will try to kick it to me like he's not with me, or he's not standing there.
Some people will say it's shallow to only date people who look a certain way, but I believe in preferences, and you can't help who you are attracted to.
I'm 5'6, slightly taller than average, but essentially average height for a woman..in general, most men are taller than me.
But I just prefer to date a man who is taller, not 6'5 or anything, but 5'11 and up. 5'10 is even fine. I used to be really hung up on height (demanding only 6'1 and up, dude I was young), but there are more pressing issues when it comes to picking a mate and when everything else lines up, height is the first thing to go.
Would I date a guy shorter than me? I can't ever see that happening. It's just something that is based in our most fundamental of instincts, in evolutionary biology, women prefer their man to be bigger than they are, it's masculine, there is that protection factor etc. Naturally, most men would like for their woman to be smaller than they are.
If I am bigger than a man at 5'6 and 130 lbs, it makes me feel awkward. I can't mentally get past it.
When women reject men based on their height, it is just as legitimate, objectively speaking, as men rejecting women based on their face. These things are genetic and beyond anyone's control so I'd hate to label it as shallow. Bc everyone would then qualify as shallow. But even between these two things, there are people who become unreasonable and take both preferences overboard.
I can't believe I read all 237 comments on this entry (before I started writing my response) and I can't believe the comments.
It only confirms to me why the black dating scene is so screwed up since so many of us place high value on stuff that shouldn't matter.
A man or woman's height or man's or a woman's skin tone has zero correlation to how someone will treat you in a relationship and how they will be as a boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife.
I dont see anywhere in which I specified this as a Black issue. This is a DATING issue.
Welcome and whatnot! I know the comments are getting up there in numbers (although, I'm betting there are still 50-leven lurkers who could be adding to the discussion much like yourself).
I'm with Streetz on this one, not only did he not attribute this as a black issue, but I don't recall any posters doing so either. Also, my opinion is that this is no different than somebody not wanting to date Flava Flav or Precious (it's who you're attracted to). I don't think it's a good look for a person who is 5'0 tall eliminating anyone in the dating pool who isn't 6'3, but that's their perogative.
Hey ya'll dont forget to vote for this blog…I just did it..it takes just a few minutes..so get on over there and vote!
I've voted twice already with different emails. Is there a limit on how many votes per email address?
Wow, this has been illuminating.
If height were replaced with skin tone, race, or socioeconomic status, would there be as much acceptance of these preferences?
Considering we've had conversations regarding race/skin tone and it didn't end up with e-thuggery going on (minus a Chocolate Drop classic or two), I'd say yes.
Gooooooooood DAMN! Short and simple answer: I'd date shorter. Height hasn't proved anything. Not even the big
d*ckhands "theory". I'm 5'8". If he wants to be my height or shorter, by all means. When we're in the bed, we'll kinda be the same height anyway. My head shall fall on his chest. And that is that!!!Crazy discussion. Last I checked Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, John Paulson, Mike Bloomberg and many of the richest men on the planet aren't that tall! Those with the real power rarely have to play to their physical strength to wield power. It brings to mind the facade that a lot of brothas like to hide behind to project some semblance of power when they actually have no power at all. They get all kinds of tattoos, mean mug and all kinds of sh!t to give the appearance of power. They have no power. When some short, wealthy develop can come and snatch the block the "hold down" right from under them. Or some CEO of a privatized prison can push for legislation to increase headcount!
Black women need to stop with the fantasies and bullsh!t. Yes, we know you all buy into the media's definition of beauty. We men do, too. But, for the sake of the Black community's future, don't discount shorter brothas. A good bit of them may actually have their stuff together. I get the impression that a lot of you sistahs would turn down a well-to-do short brother for a kat still living with his mama simply because he happens to be tall. If true, that's just dumb. And we wonder why our community is messed up. And there's no surprise why so many Black women end up raising little ones by themselves.
We need to make better decisions.
This has got to be the funniest stuff I've read in a long time. I read above where some sistah was basically implying that a "tall" brotha doesn't have to do much other than be tall, whereas a "short" brotha would have to be extraordinary to get at her. Really? It's that simple? These are the same sistahs that'll sh!t on a brotha for dating white simply on the basis of white skin. Yet, they turn around and allow access solely on the basis of height. A lot of those brothas who went white–usually pretty successful brothas–were probably given no play by sistahs simply because they weren't 6'5". Come on. We've got to do better as a community, people.
My question for all the sistahs making the demands is this: what exactly to YOU bring to the table to permit you to make such demands? Other than an azz?
I never had many issues dating women and I am 5'5. Heck My Dads side of the family is short and I have a grandfather whose about 5'3 and has over 10 kids. My father also has a brother who is 5'9 and has over 14 kids. My dad is 5'6 and pulled a woman who is taller and 5 years older then him.
So I definitely agree with the comment that if you are having trouble dating woman, most likely, it isn't because of your height.