Home About Me I’m Too Old for This Sh*t

I’m Too Old for This Sh*t

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I feel like this sometimes...

I don’t have a big intro today. Honestly, I’m just feeling like lately there are a lot of things that I’ve outgrown and I’m just getting too old to deal with. Here are a few things that come to mind since transitioning to the city that never sleeps:

The Club Scene

I learned this after an incident last year. I remember going out once and there was a group of about 4-6 people (more sausage than kitty cat) in line in front of us to get into the club. I thought these eager club goers were dressed for the festivities. One fellow however, who I estimated to be between 28 and 32, was wearing 3-400 dollar sneakers and a non-collared shirt. When the doorman told him he couldn’t get in with the sneakers and shirt, the man threw a fit.  He was enraged that his sneakers didn’t qualify as shoes. And when you piss the doorman off, that ruins it for everybody. It then went from each man must have a chick with him to get in, to only women can get in, to the doors were closed. And during all of this, the upscale sneaker dude kept right on b*tching and pleading to get in. I was turned off already by the strict dress code standards and being in line. While watching him act out and post up in protest on the corner, I couldn’t help but think to myself:



“Man, I’m way too f*ckin’ old for this.”

I’m all for good times with the people, but I’m at a point in my life where I’ll go somewhere else or go home before I stand in line pleading with the doorman/bouncer about why he needs to admit me into the club/bar/etc. It just isn’t that serious. I really don’t see what the big deal is about getting into the club. I’d rather drink in the crib with friends and partake in other “activities” than be out trying to stunt in line at a club. Just because an event has the grown and sexy label doesn’t mean it’s gonna be full of mature people.

See Also:  Breaking Old Habits

Notches on the belt just to get notches on the belt

Most decent-looking men with any redeeming qualities go through a period where they shatter headboards and spines across the country in a quest to tally up the booty points. I know men well into their 30′s who are taking down body after body after body with no end in sight. I know at least 3 men who’ve had sex with more than 100 women.  Some think that’s disgusting. I think that it’s admirable as long as the person is my friend reckless but that’s their own prerogative. My only question is at what point does it stop? Even at the tender age of 2*, I couldn’t imagine spending all my time chasing after bodies in a quest to be the all-time leading scorer. I’m too old for this.  Next…

Fighting

Last time I got in a fight was in college. After recognizing that I have uncanny strength when enraged, I decided to avoid fighting unless I truly had no choice. I’ve had friends get attacked and just last weekend I saw someone get shot. It’s not worth it. The older I get, the more substantial the consequences to my actions. When I see things getting heated at a social function, my spidey sense goes off and I leave the scene asap. What I look like going to work as a Black HR professional with scratches and bruises from brawling in the streets? Sh*t, what I look like spending a few nights in jail? I can’t blog from there.

See Also:  Don't call me sweetheart!

So folks, what do you think about these three examples? Agree or disagree? What other stuff do you think you’re too old to deal with or not deal with at this point in your life? I know everyone has something. Let’s get into it!

Never Too Old to Spoon,



Comment(124)

  1. I agree with all these points!

    I feel like i'm getting too old when people a few years younger than me start coming around…like on a college campus…being in grad school, i try to just go on campus when i need to be there and bounce. I especially feel that way about parties & some events. *shrug*

    Good post!

  2. I think I'm too old for drama. When people are fighting with each other over petty stuff and aren't willing to compromise. I think that if you're mature you can discuss things with catching an attitude, and a tone.

  3. i agree with all 3 points… point #1 is why you'll rarely catch me at a NYC club…i have to build up the patience to wait an hour to get into a crowded spot and pay 20-30 bucks.

  4. Cosign on the club scene. I mean I love to dress up and go out, however…the long lines, the bottle entry only, and the thirsty dudes/chicks are a HUGE turn-off. Definetely does not pique my interest anymore.

    1. Agree only if it's the only choice. Meaning, you and I don't have a place (you are homeless) or money for an hotel room…WTF ¡!?

      Other then that sHex anywhere anytime is perfect. Just not never, ever after a good meal…

      1. *nods* Yep, I'm against car sex if it's the only option. However, I've been in the car outside of my own spot knowing damn well we could have just gone inside.

      1. I tried car sex once.Very small car (peugeot 106) and tall man (6.4 ft), I was LOL, he was frustrated, we drove home to finish…

        1. most of the guys i've dealt with are in the 6'4 range…the opportunity has never arisen and your situation is probably what the end result would be! lol

      1. "Never too old for car sex" #FAIL..

        I don't want to ever see or hear that my parents/aunts/uncles are having relations (as they call it) in the backseats. *ugh*

  5. I always thought the writers here had mature heads…this post kinda proves it. don't get me wrong, I don't feel like there's anything wrong with hitting the club from time to time or hitting that guy if i feel like scratching an itch…but it's not a must for me so it's refreshing to see that a man in his 20s gets this already…dude u're grown 🙂

    I'm too old to be out and about with people that penny pinch when it comes to the bill…I'd rather pay for it all and get out of there instead of having to sit through an excruciating wait as each individual attempts to itemize their share. I just think it's poor form to want to do that cos somebody always gets pi$$ed off (e.g. x only paid for a coke and chips but she snacked on those chicken wings too so why does she get away with not paying). it ruins the fun for everyone.

    1. Amen to that penny pinching!! OMG. I avoid going out w/ certain girlfriends b/c I feel like we are too old for that. All of us are college grads with decent jobs, and we're not eating at Wolfgang Pucks. I mean this is Friday or Ruby Tuesdays or Ruth Chris' let just split the bill 4 or 5 ways and call it even. Must we really get into the fact that I ordered a vodka lemonade for $8 and your Rum & Coke was only $6?!

      1. They lack class. Sometimes you either have to lower your standards and do the same or choose not to go out with them. Maybe that is why I don't mind going to restaurents alone… I love good food, my bud tastes are picky.

    2. Yeah, itemizing bills is whack

      HOWEVER I be damned I split a bill and all I had was tea, and your up there ordering Patron margarita's like they're going out of style. It's only right that person cough up the extra cash. You're not getting drunk on my dime.

      1. Lmao!! Right. I mean if there is an extreme difference in price we'll work that out. Case in point, went to a fancy shmancy restaurant w/ my chicas. One ate before she came because she forgot so all she ordered was a salad while the rest of us when HAM on the T-bone's, sirloin, filet mignon's, etc. That's doable. But when we splitting hairs over "Oh she ordered that extra guacamole…" it's extra ridiculous and I don't have time.

  6. I don't really prefer the phrase "I'm too old for…" But I will say that lately I've been feeling I've grown out of the club scene as well. If its not VIP, away from all the crowds, pushing, & drink spilling then I don't need to be there. Oh yeah & another thing I've ENTIRELY grown out of is people at work asking my age. All you need to know is that I'm old enough to work here. After a person turns 21 all of that "how old are you?" crap gets annoying. Unless you're trying to date me & you're trying to make sure I'm legal (I clearly do NOT look like I'm under 18) my age really shouldn't matter. Everyone at my job judges me because I'm 'so young' which bothers me greatly. What's young to some people is grown to others, it just depends on who you ask. Other than those 2 things I really can't think of things that I'm 'too old' for because even when I reach my 30's I think I'll still feel young *shrug*

    1. HP – you sound like you're in the middle stages. Folks at your job ask you because they want to compare where they were when they were your age to where you are now. They will also use your position to hold over their own kids your age and pressure them, lol. This usually comes right before someone starts hating, so watch out.

      I must admit though – getting carded past 30 is an ego boost. *Back when I could drink* I looooved getting carded and watching some 22 yr old server's face when they saw I was born in the '70's, lol.

      1. ''getting carded past 30'' is bothering me when they need to double check if my ID is not a fake one… they usually call the manager to make sure I am past 21 years old (I am 32 ! I agree I may look younger but not under 21) or ask for a second ID ! Everybody look at me as if I did something wrong. My French (bad) temper comes back quickly in that situation.

        1. Went to a bar in Annapolis a few weekends ago with some mid-late 20 somethings. Everyone in front of me was carded, but when I walked up they took one look at me and said "Nah, you're Ok….SIR". >:0[

    2. Hebrew, I feel you on the "how old are you" comments. When working in a corporate environment, older people are often intimidated by young people. They feel like you're here to steal their jobs or become their bosses (which is, often times, somewhat true).

      They ask our age as a way of trying to make you feel unqualified for whatever you're heading towards. Best way to throw it back on them is to just respond with – "I'm (insert age), how old are you".

      1. @Most: yeah…that would be funny to see their reactions! Older people never like to be asked their age but will be quick to question a 'youngins' age…smh!

    3. You tell them you are old enough to know that the work place is not the place to discuss personal business! They sizing you up so they can see what they can get away with…corporate vultures

  7. Great list! Reminds of the customer i had the other day complaining about the color of her nail polish and how she felt she was too old (early 50's or late40's) to be wearing it. (It truly wasn't inappropriate; a pale purple and very cute)

    Honestly, i feel like I was born too old for the club and the ridiculous line, along with most other things my peers consider [age] appropriate.

  8. I'm too old for popularity contests. This is not high school. Even if a million and one people know you, I guarantee if you drop dead right now a billion people in China will continue on with their lives. Get over yourself!

    I'm too old for jealous grown adults. Lady, you are twice my age. It is not my fault that I am accomplishing more than your kids plus you put together.

    I'm too old to lie to protect your feelings. I will not pretend to like your boyfriend or think he is the "one" for you. simply accept that I will tell you he is not to be trusted, is a liar, no good for you, & just playing games. Then, I will let you make your own mistakes because I am not your momma, but you will only get a hour when you want to start venting about his antics.

    I'm too old for drama. Point. Blank. Period.

    Although, I'm not really old at all, 😉

    Great post!

    1. "I’m too old for popularity contests. This is not high school. Even if a million and one people know you, I guarantee if you drop dead right now a billion people in China will continue on with their lives. Get over yourself!"

      This! I know many people who measure their self worth by how many FB friends they have or how many people will show up to their birthday party. Not me, I'm a wolf pack of one anyhow. *shrugs*

      1. Yes!!!! It really is pitiful. What makes me even sorry for people is when they measure their importance by how many followers they have on twitter.

        Like, how old are you again? When did a social network define who you are and your worth. Get a life & real friends. I'm too old for that.

        & you can't be a party of one! I know there is at least a plus 1!

    2. Very true! People don't listen when they come to you for advice or want to gripe about their issues…wasting your precious time and then want to waste it more when the "I told you so" happens!

  9. @Teflon Temptress: Thanks for the insight…unfortunately the hate has already begun. I've gotten everything from: "How is she so young driving THAT car & I'm only driving THIS?" to…"She spends all of her money on Coach" (its actually Gucci but ALL of my money isn't spent on material things smh)…to my fav: "Her parents must take care of her." So now I'm labeled 'Daddy's Girl' in the office! Ugh!

      1. Right…the woman who asked me was a grandmother so no wonder why she mistook the G's for C's…lol. & I oh so politely corrected her!

      2. TRUTH!!!

        I told one of my girlfriends this same exact thing earlier this year when she was in the market for a new bag. Of course she looked at me like I was HELLA CRAZY and laughed it off and still went through with her purchase….. Oh well you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink *shrugs*

      3. 'Coach' is for grannies or teenagers, really ?

        Well I discovered Coach 2 years ago and I like their leather bags. My coach bag matches perfectly my MK hot shoes and my Alain Manoukian belt (trust me I tried to find them all in the same brand but I couldn't, now I need the boots for the winter).

        Where I come from Gucci is more for those who like to show off, it depends of the model you have though.

        (how come I answer the posts more when I am at work compared to when I don't work… Hope this is not something addictive)

        1. @MissMartinique

          I'm not saying Coach doesn't make quality products, they definitely do. Generally speaking though, there really is no comparison between Coach and higher end brands like Gucci or LV. Coach for the past few years has produced their bags, primarily, in China. They use high quality but, not top of the line materials. Gucci and LV are produced in either Italy, France or the US and they only use top of the line materials.

          In terms of style, most women don't buy new, expensive bags each season, but, those that do will tell you that Gucci and LV will always set the standard, and Coach will always follow their lead. If you're buying your bags a season or 2 late, you really won't know who innovated and who copied.

          Lastly, Coach will also produce higher quantities of each bag it creates. Gucci and LV will always have fewer. So, if you don't mind a million other chicks having the same bag as you, it's all gravy. If you like to be a little more exclusive, you'd go Gucci or LV. But, I'm sure you rock your Coach well, I'm not judging…

          And, for the record, I only know this stuff because I like to buy for my wife… (I can feel the side eyes you were all throwing my way).

    1. I feel strange carrying certain bags of mine around my coworkers too because its like I know they are sizing me up and scrutinizing. I don't drive a luxury car but if I did I know that would be the icing on the cake. I'm the youngest on my team–and the best dressed outside of my boss (just saying) and the only negro so hey all eyes are always on me… #shrugs

      1. So every morning they have they cup of hot haterade! Don't worry about them do you. You have to dress for the job that you want! *But do you feel you have to do all that, so they accept you as an equal? Because really they are not judging you by your body of work? They are just looking at your outside? And you look like you fly by nature *shrugs* they are probably intimidated by you.

        1. thx girl.

          "You have to dress for the job that you want!"–I believe in this also. but yeah most of the time because I am young–and look even younger I had to get around a learning curve and perceptions of not being capable–but 3 years in I think I've gotten past that. I do dress up to look older though. I pretty much HAVE to. Plus I was just raised to take pride in my appearance and I like clothes. lol.

  10. I'm laughing at this list because I'm too old for so MANY things!

    My tolerence level is exceptionally low…I'll continue reading and nodding my head.

  11. agreed on all items listed.

    Belt Notches: It becomes annoying and expensive (mentally) to drown yourself in a sea of pointless poon.

    …i can't help but think of the scene in Wedding Crashers where the father says to Vince Vaughn's character, "i hope she's not just another notch on your belt" to which he replied, "i don't even wear a belt"

    Club Scene: as a certified sneakerhead, #shoutout to Android & Supra, i hate having to worry about meeting dress code requirements when i know i'll be dressed better than 90% of the male population there…I'll stick to house parties and happy hours…i'd rather go to a concert anyway….

  12. c/s all points…especially going to the club

    In my case…clubs in NY. They're are ALWAYS trying to stunt…long lines to make you think it's popping inside when the "party" hasn't even popped off yet. I'm not beat. I'll keep my arse on the other side of the Hudson (NJ) where parking is generally free, drinks are cheaper, and the music is better.

    The last time I partied in the city was Good Friday and that's off the fact that we knew the DJ and we agreed prior to to order bottle service.

    I'm too old for Duck Tales. No, not the cartoon. But the friend or relative who ALWAYS has to one up your story…or they just telling sh*t that's not true. For example, in conversation I mentioned that I played 2 full court games this weekend. Now instead of letting my athletic prowess be acknowledged by others, Duck Tales has to one up my story and say they played 3 games of full court, while balancing a midget on their shoulders and doing the Dougie.

    What makes it worse…is that Duck Tales is lazy, so this story couldn't possibly be true…even in their dreams.

    Just be yourself B…let me and my story be great, you'll have your shine.

  13. I don't know if I've had enough life experiences yet to be too old for anything but watching nick/disney lol.

    BUT…

    I'd much rather stay in or just chill than go to the club. There are some times though when I want to get dressed up, go out and dance. New Years Eve is turning into one of those times when I don't want to go to the club.

    I've fought once. It was my little sister…. we tore each other up and that was quite enough. Although if I don't stop being sharp in the mouth I may have to retract this statement.

    I am too old for allowing bullsh*t in my life. My time is limited these days and if you're wasting it- I'm trashing you. Real talk.

  14. Oh, and I'm too old to deal w/ somebody's bad a$$ kid.

    Bad kids aren't cute anymore. A few years ago, I'd probably laugh at inappropriate behavior. Now a days, I'm liable to knock a kid's head clean off their shoulders…then demand they pick it back up.

    1. YES!!! I do not have the patience for other people's kids. Especially the ones that run around singing the latest Gucci and Jeezy song ugh!

      Get Yo Damn Kids!

  15. This is a poignant and timely post.

    Clubs – This is why i feel if I can't go right into the club (skip line, know people etc) I dont want to deal with it. This is why my next bday party will be somewhere free with no lines. Hate having my people outside waiting for no reason. I've also gotten spoiled attending madd industry functions where you dress however, wait for not too long, and party/network with good people. *shrug*

    Fighting – I recently lost another one of my peoples this weekend to senseless violence. Like, people are still killing each other on some "go to the trunk" sh*t? It's not worth it at all. I always say that if an altercation breaks out, especially in an outdoor area, you need to just LEAVE. You never know who has what on their mind.

    I'm too old to get hammered to the point of vomiting. Now, this may or may not happen to me, but one should not SEEK this out! Lol…

    Too old to party every single weekend of the year. I never got "burned out", but working full time tires your body to the point that when Friday comes around, unless someone hypes me, Im content to stay in the crib and rest/relax/bs on the net/read/play videogames/thronx.

    Too old spend money frivilously… i should say im too broke but it goes hand in hand. Need to start thinking long term, save, and make sure the check – to – check thing isnt a permanent reality.

    1. Yeah, vomiting from the drank is a no-no. I've had my fair share of sloppy nights and even that is something that I'm getting a little tired of…more so because of the toll it takes on my body. I'm too old to be waking up feeling too old.lol

      1. yea…i have to consciously make sure I eat before going out if i even THINK i may drink…i don't seek to throw up but sometimes, things sneak up on you…smh

    1. I am da bruhz. Hence my mention of uncanny strength when enraged.lol. I'm also da smart bruhz and the professional bruhz. Smart bruhz don't brawl. They just get away and don't snitch.lol.

  16. Definitely too old for the club scene. Only time I'm in the club is if someone I know is hosting something, and, in that case, I'm arriving early and leaving early.

    I just can't subject myself to the judgment of a 50k/year-AlmostMadeItToTheNFLbutGotCutInstead bouncer who thinks he's important because he get to decide who gets in and who doesn't. Even worse, I will not allow myself to be judged by a party promoter because, they are, generally speaking… corny as hell.

    ***The only time the above doesn't count is when in Vegas. In Vegas you're never too old for anything***

    I'm too old for big labels on my clothes. Also, I'm too old for celebrity clothing lines, i.e. Sean John, Rocawear… etc.

    I'm too old for fashion trends. By my age, you should have your own sense of style and it should be, for the most part, timeless. I have articles of clothing that are really old, that still look new when I break them out. This is because I wear what I like, not what's popular.

    I'm too old for a Mohawk, or FauxHawk or any time of designs in my hair or cornrows or braids. Fellas if your past 25 and not an artist or musician… you are too.

    There's more – but this is a good start.

    Oh – btw – I'm not too old fight, but only for the right reasons. Having a wife, I take protecting her very serious. I also take her respect very serious. You can't get punked in the street in front of your wife and expect her to respect you at home. The next time you're in an argument, and you tell your wife that she needs to lower her voice and speak, she'll say, or at least think to herself "Why you ain't tell that to homey that chumped you last week?"

  17. I can agree on all three.

    A lot of growing old also makes you feel a particular way about associates as well. For instance:

    1. Your homeboy that almost always brings a fighting situation into any outing gets left home or you ask for him to ride with someone else. This is usually the cat that even past 30 has to flex in the street and talk out the side of his neck. Ladies you probably go through this too.

    2. The Chronic Passer-Outer: I understand getting it in, but that person that you find slouched in a lounge chair or who you have to drag around like "Weekend at Bernie's." Ya'll know what I'm talking about.

    3. The "I Told My Girl I Was Somewhere Else" Cat. Nothing is worse than covering for the dude who has "the greatest girl in the world" yet he always has to have an alibi. Of course, your name is always the one used since you're the single and carefree one.

    I'm just too old for nonsense. I spend Fridays chilling at the crib and sometimes don't mind doing it on Saturday either. Those people that always have to be out can kick rocks. Amazingly the ones who have the lightest pockets always want to be the ones on the scene to add to their ever expanding "Out n About" album on FB.

    1. Words to grow on!

      Especially #3: It will get homeboy a serious redline and black x through his name as fas as the girlfriend is concerned…she will loathe him.

  18. Someone told me the other day that as of my birthday I'll be officially too old to wear ultra-short skirts and batty riders…what say you SBM fam??

    1. My aunt told me that the other day when I was in Jamaica. I'm only going to be 28. Plus I work out hard like 4 days a week. If the MILFS I see out and about can do it why can't I?

  19. I don't like to say i'm too old, because i'm on that Jay-Z path of thinking I can be young forever.

    I tell you one thing, i'll just substitute, "Over it." For a lot of these things… I'm not over the club, but in attempts to sound like a 20-something chick, "If I don't know someone with a table, i'm not messing with it." I only go to the bar at happy hour. In addition, i'm not like a college boy trying to scoop numbers and meet girls. I do not like being in the club for 3-4 hours. That's just dumb to me. I might be there for max 2 hours before I need to do something else. My good friend told me this, "If you close the club, you lost."

    I don't fight, some of you who have met me know this makes perfect sense. I will slap the crap out of you with whatever is in my reach. But the 2-5s, wasn't in my lifetime.

    Slim touched on notches on the belt. Dog to be honest, i'm through with bragging about women and stuff in general. I'm also through with accepting things I don't want. I like thongs, i've done something about it. I've started M.A.B. – men against boyshorts… it comes a point in a man's life when he realizes he ain't got to put up with what he doesn't want to.

    And the number one thing about getting older is when you realize that you can be as stubborn as hell and people will just have to deal with it or get away from you…

    If you don't pay to go to clubs, and the club asks for cover, you don't give two shakes about being the party spoiler. Y'all can go in there if you want, I drove, i'm going home. Work to hard for my money to drop $20-40 just to have a good night with y'all knuckleheads.

  20. Alright… my one addition for the day:

    I'm too old for men's girlfriends/ex-girlfriends/crazy stalkers to be calling my cell. Really? Really son? UGH. I'm on some Kelly Rowland Grown Woman ish and I really cant deal. She will not call my phone all indignant b/c YOU are out creeping. And furthermore, I'm too old to deal w/ disrespectful arse dudes. You knew you had a girl or a situation when I asked. Keep it moving. It's a shame when I my spidey senses start tingling at the sight of a certain unknown number on the phone.

    1. Oooh yes co-sign! I am too old for little girls to be involving me in their personal soap operas. Please visit your frustrations on your trifling ass man and leave me out of it.

  21. Oh, and I'm too old to have people playing on my phone.

    You call me, you state YOUR name…don't you dare ask me who this is…you called my phone. And don't start the "Oh, you don't know who this is" or guess who.

    I'll hang up in a heart beat.

  22. The Club Scene: Maybe it’s just my personality type, but I was over this long ago. Before I turned 24 I realized it’s not my thing to pay to get into a place with overpriced drinks, ignint negroes, and bad music. Barbecues & gatherings >>>>> clubs.

    Notches on the belt just to get notches on the belt: I don’t even understand this one anymore. Women are giving it up too easy nowadays, it’s not even an accomplishment. Lame, ugly and broke guys are getting it regularly now.

    Fighting: Definitely not worth it. Drama rarely follows me, but then most negroes see the 18” guns and reconsider their belligerence.

    Additional:

    Too old to sit in the upper section of a sporting event: Yes, I’m too good to sit up in the rafters, barely able to tell if that’s Dwyane Wade or Mario Chalmers that is dribbling the ball.

    Too old to ride the bus: I can’t do the public limo anymore. I’ll catch a cab if the car breaks down.

    Too old to dance: Once you hit 30, stepping and slow dancing is ok, just about everything else is off limits. And I may not be old enough to step.

    Too old to play basketball: Being too busy to play + too much weightlifting + sore knees = retirement from basketball.

    1. @Hugh Jazz – The reason why men go to the club is because there's a bunch of female dogs and garden tools in there with no clothes on.

      Those women don't hang out at Borders.

      1. That's cool. I just prefer to meet them at Borders, then rendezvous at a private location and have them take their clothes off. Then again, that's just me.

      1. LMAO!!! He shouldn't have had his *ss in the street. I drive like a I live on the race track. I would have hit him too.

        Goofy! lol

  23. I am too old for a lot of shit.

    I am too old to be going to events and clubs that have you waiting outside for hella long only to get in there and it is empty ass hell. By the way venues we are on to you o_O

    I am too old to be waiting in line ad-hearing to the said dress code only to get in and Ninja's is wearing shorts and sneakers!! So fucking annoying! Mature sexy crowd my ass!!

    I am on a party/network strictly during the week program. NYC subways be trippin' on the weekends and I am tired by Friday anyway. Saturday & Sunday is low key and chill mode…

    If you see me out on the weekend its a fluke….

    Nothing wrong with a romp in the car …granted I am 6ft so that may be a challenge…

    1. DivaKattGurl: "Nothing wrong with a romp in the car …granted I am 6ft so that may be a challenge…"

      My gf is 5'-11". It can be done.

    2. "I am too old to be going to events and clubs that have you waiting outside for hella long only to get in there and it is empty ass hell. By the way venues we are on to you o_O"

      Yup!!! The *comeearlyb4doorsclosecapacityswindle* has been cracked wide open. LOL

      I stopped falling for that lie years ago so now if I go to a club I just take my sweet time and chances and if we don't get in OH WELL on to the next one.

      Sidenote: The aboveforementioned swindle is NOT A GAME during certain times of the year like Labor Day Weekend in NYC/Brooklyn.

  24. I'm too old to play games. You're an adult. Stop playing them

    – I'm NEVER too old to play Splinter Cell and patiently waiting on Halo, Madden, I see you, we got a date.

    I'm too old to be hanging around some people. You're 28, stop acting 19.

    – I'm NEVER too old to play cougar with a 19 year old

    I'm too old for bullish insecurities. Get some confidence and self esteem.

    – I'm NEVER too old to be super confident

    Hehe… great post!

  25. I'm too old to be taking pictures in the club/ bar/etc all DAMN night long. I'm too old to try and see who can get the most phone numbers. I'm too old to go to the same clubs playing the same music. I'm too old for YOU to text me about nothing AT all. I'm too old for most of this new hip hop and so called RnB music.

    1. "I’m too old to be taking pictures in the club/ bar/etc all DAMN night long."

      OMG!!! Rotflmao. The notorius taking pictures in the club all night. Are you serious? Was it that much fun?!? People have actually brought new cameras to take pictures in the club!!! I never did the pics but I am definitely to old for that crap!! Get a life!!!

      1. That irks me to a high level and I know I am going to experience it in October at my Alma Mater's homecoming. I feel like I'm in high school, not College, all over again. UGH!

  26. I'm definitely too old for clubs. I went out Saturday with some friends and after about an hour of shaking my groove thang I had had enough and went home, much to the dismay of my friends. I'm definitely too old for drama and fighting. What do I look like going to jail? And better yet, who has bail money to get me out?!?! #notagoodlook

  27. Good list Slim! It came around right on time…I went on my porch this morning, sighed, shook my head and managed to get a "I'm too old for this bullshit" out.

    Thanks.

  28. You guys are so my virtual E-friends!!! This was a really good post and really good comments. I am to old for the club especially the "21 and up" crowds because most of them are 18. I am too old to play on the phone, smart phones are expensive and I would prefer spending my phone time doing something constructive (reading blogs and working on mine). I am too old to be playing around- either you want me or you don't.

    I am closer to 30 than to 20, I am just to old. Someone mention earlier it's time to start tinking about saving money, buying homes, havings families, etc. I just don't have time for unnecessary games.

  29. what am I too old for..

    – them grown a** men with the "psst, hey red" shullbit..

    i'm grown! open yo mouth and figure it out.. THEN i will nicely shut you down.. you know better than that.. i don't answer "sounds" I dont' even answer when someone calls me "Nikki".. I'm really gonna answer your sounds? #NahSuh

    – hiding

    if you live at home, i won't judge.. BUT if i have to leave before momma comes home or duck in the closet because she came home on lunch break consider it done.. not only will i not do it, that will be the last time you see me.. that's some "teenage love" crap..

    – i'm too old for peer pressure..

    stop trying to convince me that getting drunk is da business.. i've never been drunk a day in my life, you REALLY think I have that on my bucket list NOW? I have my own mind, and careful.. I know how to use it..

    – I'm too old to build up your ego..

    Stop fishing for compliments, it's not cute. If you don't believe it, then I don't believe it.

    – I'm too old for the "if my man calls I was with you" situations..

    Nah kid.. I'm not lying for anyone. Not at anytime. I don't even lie when it'll get me out of trouble. I'm REALLY gonna lie for you!? find another chump.. you grown enough to do your dirt, then be grown and stand behind your choice.. ewww

    – too old to be giving 70×7 chances..

    I'm not walking down the "let's try again, let's start over.. I know I gave you a disease from Peaches, but I love you" speech.. Nope.. I'll forgive you, but chances? Nah, you might not even make it to the 3rd strike..

    that might be it for now..

    1. YES!!! Similar sentiments I wanted to express, but couldn't find the words.

      I'm too grown/too old for you to be all up on me like this…*extends arm* gothataway

      1. exactly! Its annoying! I shouldn't have to wonder if i need to tell you that i need the living room to do my workouts…i also shouldn't feel this frustrated when folks walk into the door…if only my father finished his house! I wouldn't have to deal with all this!

        1. I totally agree…i almost exploded earlier (well, i lightweight did) when a few things got to me!

          When i do start my own family, it would be different, the child will be mine & he/she WILL know discipline!

  30. Good post.

    Clubs – I never was into clubbing. Never understood what was fun about doing the same stuff on a different day. I can say i clubbed about 5 times the whole of last year. I'm more into traveling and experiencing different cultures than clubbing.

    Fighting – Last time I fought was in high school. People think I'm pretty intimidating so they stay clear of trying to pick a fight with me. Some others a pretty surprised whenever I wave the white flag first even if I wasn't at fault. I think of it this way, just because I can beat the devil out of someone doesn't mean I should….a true gentleman always backs down until he has no other choice than to fist up.

    Notches on the belt – never understood what that meant till now. I date see the appeal in dating a lot of women. I date quality girls and I never talk about them with anyone, not even my brother. I don't think that is something to brag about. In my opinion, a man-whore is still a whore, doesn't matter if your boys applaud you. Quality beats quantity any day….too bad the quality of girls around keep falling by the 2nd and men too.

  31. You're living in the Bean now right? You may just be too old for clubs in Boston or any city not NYC or LA. Boston 's a college town, so the night life caters to a different crowd. There's something for everyone in NY.

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