Everyone wants to talk about how to make sex better.  Four words, in this order, but don’t feel married to it.  Harder, better, faster, stronger.  Trust me, send the person you’re having sex with this article and see how they react.  Their face lights up, woooooooooooooo!

Hit it a little harder next time, don’t be acting timid. You know you get a little soft around the edges.  A guy jumps in the ring circling his opponent and throwing combinations, but then towards the later rounds he’s hugging his opponent and trying to ride it out.  Try harder.  You may break beds, you may break shower doors, you may even break the coffee table? (#shithappens), but you can’t break her.  So here’s what I think, try and break her.  Try as hard as humanly possible.

(Suggested position: Bend her over a table, or up against any hard surface, so that there is nothing to soften the blow.)

In order to get better at what you’re doing you need to treat it like it’s important to you. Prepare, perform, debrief and review.  If you aren’t having team meetings with your mind, body and manhood outside of the bedroom, you can’t expect to perform well on the field.  I’m not opposed to taping and having a whiteboard in the bedroom.  Open your mouth and start asking your partner about what just happened.  If you are unsure, something went wrong.  The best compliment a woman can give a man about sex is absolute incoherence, I want you to give her vertigo.  “No, Stop, Please, Don’t, Thank you.”  I want you to make her slide across that bed like she just found out there was a rattlesnake under the covers.

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(Suggested position: In the living room with a camera connected to the big screen on a live stream.)

Um… a lot of women would prefer if you could do it faster.  Some like it slow, most like it fast.  Teach yourself how to go faster for a longer period of time and this will take you far in life.  Me, personally, I oscillate the alphabet.  Sounds weird, but hey I’m with you, it’s damn hard to concentrate on not doing something.  Have you ever been riding on a straight road with your date, looked in her eyes and gassed the car to like 100MPH?  That’s the same as looking her in the eyes and thinking about something completely different.  I’m just being honest with you, the way it’s going to feel physically is not in your favor, and the look on her face … that look of impending incoherence, mentally will send you into another space.  #spacejams

(Suggested position: Her on top, she raises a little and you thrust upward from the bottom as fast as you can, hold her sides to push her up and down.)

When a woman says she wants to feel like a ceiling fan.  She wants to feel like a ceiling fan.  Flip her, twist her, bend her, do whatever you got to do.  I want you to push her head so far into the pillow she starts to tear up.  Put, not place, put your hand on her shoulder and the other in her hair, close to the root though, (sh*t can go horribly wrong if you grab her hair by the ends, you’ll end up rolling back like Cassie), but grab hold of that shoulder and be as strong as you can be.  Keep in mind though, you can squat as much as you weigh, so don’t be scared that you can’t pick her up.  Pick her up, the wall wants to help you too.

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(Suggested position: Standing with her legs straddling you, and her back against the wall.)

Recap: Harder = break her, Better = Incoherence, Faster = Until the wheels fall off, Stronger = to the window to the wall.  Our goals are simple, a better sex life.  This is not to say that you should be this way each time you have sex with your lady, that just isn’t good for business.  Trust me, sometimes they do want that passionate flow, like one out of ten times.  Remind her that you’re a man and she’s a woman, these days if she wanted to have sex with a soft sweet woman who can make her feel special, she would.  You’re a man, be a man.