Home Dating & Relationships Rules of Engagement 5 secrets about women that men MUST know

5 secrets about women that men MUST know

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Fellas,

Some of you are clueless to the actions and movements of females women. Over the years I’ve noticed certain trends and behaviours that would otherwise go unnoticed by my bretheren. Here are a few observations:



When women are done with relationships, they start testing the market like free agents…

Just like when u shop for new jobs while still working at your current job – I always saythat women would make the BEST General Managers. If they see that you’re slipping, the relationship has gone as far as possible, and that she isn’t going to win a championship ring, she will gut the team and start anew. Think about what Otis Smith did in Orlando. You  thought that team would make another run, but Otis gave them 25 games. He saw their productivity level and decided to make the change sooner than later. I’m sure that the Magic players had no idea the trade would go down, and neither will you. She will start “innocently taking inquiries”, will noticeably stop harping on the things about you that piss her off, and slowly fade away until either she a) tells you its over, b) stops calling, or c) you see her relationship status change on facebook to a dude who isn’t you dawg *TI voice*! So in their mind they may be done with you, but may not express it verbally, until they’ve moved on and just..err…umm.. “forgot” to tell you.

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Women know how to speak our language, but they choose otherwise!

I spoke a while ago about the Male-Female Rosetta stone, and how I hate having to decipher little women phrases in order to get to the point. Truth is, women can be more straight forward, but they don’t want to do it the easy way. You know why? As a significant other, FWB, or even a friend, you should know them well enough that they don’t have to spell out everything for you. You should know their nuances, facial expressions, and that a loud sigh means you’re about to catch a Shawn Michaels superkick to the grill. Besides, they’re speaking ENGLISH so why should this even be an issue?!!! You can see I’ve heard this explanation a few times, huh? Doesn’t mean I agree, but it is a fact, to them…

Women and Kaiser Soze: SAME PEOPLE!

The greatest trick that women ever played on the world is convincing men that they don’t swindle. Women are WAY bigger liars than men, first of all. They know how to manipulate tears to their advantage. Finally, they got the good good, and know how to leverage that to get their hearts desires. Men are strong, but a vast majority of us have genuflected before the power of the P.U.S.S.Y., but don’t think they don’t know. Helen of Troy sent 50-11 men to their deaths to fight a war for her stankin arse. Cleopatra made legendary dictators trick (and they had it), so this is a recurring theme throughout time that will continue. Be aware my dudes!

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Women and their friends know everything about you and talk crazily.

Women converse about men in a different way. It’s more in depth, and intense. I stumbled upon girl talk before, and was lowkey traumatized! Just know that women might have seen those naked pictures you sent your shorty, know that story about you two and the balcony, and other things that might surprise you. If you hear snickers or giggles, or the respectful salute when you say what’s up to her friends, either she put in the CRAZY good word, or they know your….shortcomings. Reputation is a gift and a curse, so get your voodoo dolls out and make it rain!

The perfect man for women is a man full of imperfections

I’m convinced that women want a man who challenges them, well real women. If you did all the right things and had no kinks in your armour, women would suspect you to be phony. If you did everything they said and never conflicted with them, women would deem you a pushover and treat you like a used Kleenex. Now, some women want to be in total control of a man, so this thought appeals to them, but like I said, real women want that challenge. They want to know that you have a flaw that makes you perfect for them. They want to see you struggle to overcome that flaw, and rise from the ashes, you know why? If they see you as a potential future BF/Husband, they want to know that in any struggle you will be a man and do what you need in order to succeed and make you a better person. They want to see that you have backbone and can withstand the test of time. They want you to disagree with them, have your own opinion, and put your foot down at times. You may not be perfect, you may stumble, but women are turned on and attracted to men who fall from the challenges of life and get back on their feet stronger and more complete.

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Take these words home and think it through…

Comment(120)

      1. Have to disagree with you there, Tooshy1… Some people WANT to be complicated since they figure trying to figure them out will keep you around… The Rubix Cube Gambit, if you would? And, others are so in the fog with themselves that they unknowingly complicate things…

        1. You summed that up so nicely in one small paragraph….see folks are not so complex at all. lol! I kid, I kid…

        2. You're right. Some women like drama and they look for dudes that like drama.

          Not all women are like that.

  1. I was the queen at free agent shopping. I mean if he is slipping I was tip-toeing. However, as you get older and wiser you learn that ish gets old. Why, you putting us on front street E-bragas?

    Oh and all that talk about women being better liars….yes that is true too. However, we only usually lie if it is necessary. Dudes steady exaggerating about their job title, income, schlong size ( see yesterday's post), sex skills, whoreness (yes I made that word up), relationship status, credit score, stamina, baby mamas, NAME, address, education….you get the picture. Holla!

    1. My name is Symbiotic Loner, and I currently have a free agent shopper problem… Why? Ironically, YOU answered it…

      "…all that talk about women being better liars….yes that is true too…"

      If a woman downgrades herself to female by slipping in the truth department, I WILL start tipping… And shopping… And… Also, a woman can (and usually does) feed my distrust of her. Just the fact alone that women are better liars than men usually starts it with me. The rest is up to the INDIVIDUAL woman. By not doing the same things a woman did to "hook" me is how she usually loses me. That includes sharing of the truth, BTW.

      If a woman wants to kill MY free agent stance, she GOTTA step up trustworthy. That means, through the fire. Standing the rain… Having staying power. Holding back the years… Otherwise, I am and will continue to be a free agent since a woman worth committing to commits accordingly.

      "…we [women] only usually lie if it is necessary…" is shullbit by my experience. Point blank. If a man is only faithful by what options he has, a woman is only faithful TO THE TRUTH by what options she sees as available. That includes lying to herself. That's cool if a woman choses to lie to herself, but please leave ME out of Delusion-ville… Been through that town ENOUGH times…

      Also, that's not true that all men are chronic exaggeraters.

      1. "Just the fact alone that women are better liars than men usually starts it with me."

        Not so sure on which gender is the "better" liar as I've seen situations in which either gender could have taken the Oscar in the role of best in an untruthful persuasion peformance.

        Bottom line: People lie – to protect, to avoid, or to gain *fill in the blank*

    2. Cosign! We lie only when necessary. Men can lie for no good reason…stupid lies too. The more stupid the lie, the easier it is to get caught. I try to tell men this all the time. The reason why they get busted so many times is because the lies are stupid and not necessary. Plus women are smarter so we can catch them quicker. lol j/k…no i'm not.

    3. "Oh and all that talk about women being better liars….yes that is true too. However, we only usually lie if it is necessary."

      This in itself, is a lie.

      Thanks BP! 🙂

  2. The only thing I disagree with is the part about understanding someone. It sets someone up for the okie doke if you expect them to know everything. Yes little subtleties will be learned but its better to just say them outright if there is any confusion.

  3. I am going to agree with exception to some of your points….

    We test the Market for Free Agents – Only after we've sat our star player down several times to discuss his lacking performance, and made several suggestions of how you could improve and keep your star standing with the team….we've benched you, put you back out there and benched you again, and you still won't play right..so, don't act all surprised when you get traded.

    We Speak Your Language – That is not true. WE communicate very differently. We say one thing and you actually hear something else.

    We are way bigger liarns – No, I think Men lie more often and we lie better….but, if you are lying more often then you are the biggest lier. period.

    Women and there friends know everything – Sometimes, we tell our friends what we want them to know. I spoon feed my information and I definitely don't discuss what I do in the bedroom. I may come with an occasional dilemma to get some help with…but, I don't tell all of my business.

    The pefect man for a woman is a man with imperfections – Yup, this is the only statement I can't really disagree with at all.

    Good Post Streetz,

    1. "Yup, this is the only statement I can’t really disagree with at all"

      Dang Queen, you couldn't find the strength to say you agree with Streetz on the last point lol?

      It's like you went in trying to pick a fight..

      1. LOL..DeKeLa

        I am not trying to pick a fight with Streetz…he knows I respect his opinion and his knowledge…I just don't agree with him on this….but, I do AGREE witht the last point…lol.

    2. We test the Market for Free Agents – Only after we’ve sat our star player down several times to discuss his lacking performance, and made several suggestions of how you could improve and keep your star standing with the team….we’ve benched you, put you back out there and benched you again, and you still won’t play right..so, don’t act all surprised when you get traded.

      *bows down*

      All Hail QueenT

      You broke it down — nothing left to say..

      1. Maybe dude won't play right cause he knows you're out there recruiting players for his spot?

        Remember, men don't confront women about cheating. We know whats going on and allow you to play yourself.

        1. @ il Duce

          Not necessarily. I wasn't cheating or even thinking about. I feel that it is only fair to stay honest in order to get the best result when in a serious relationship. However..in the words of Faith, when I am 'Gone Already", all is fair.

          How many warnings does a brother need? How long must a sister be taken for granted before dude acts right?

        2. Recruiting while in a relationship is cheating. Not sexually, but you are being intimate with another man.

          Guys pick up on this and then we could care less about tryin to fix the relationship.

        3. Recruiting….who said anything about that. I smiled at a dude, and yes, I was interested, but if homie had been treating me right…NONE of that would have happened. I gave him plenty chances to act right.

          Furthermore, I can't cheat on you if we are not married either. I learned that early. Relationships are not marriages for THAT reason. Once I realize marriage is not in my future with a guy…I am on the market already. I don’t play house.

          "Guys pick up on this and then we could care less about tryin to fix the relationship."

          To that I say, well he should have picked up on my unhappiness and warnings. Because the smile didn't come until after that. If he suspected anything, it was me pulling away from him because he wasn't doing right. In my case, that dude was not trying to FIX anything EVER….he just thought I was going to continue to accept his bs.

        4. Remember, men don’t confront women about cheating. We know whats going on and allow you to play yourself.

          What?!!!?? *SucksTeeth*

          This is possible if the man is creeping himself, but if dude is being faithful and loving you best believe he is sniffing homegirls panties daily if he suspects something is up.

      2. Queen, you are speaking truth right here.

        I left my ex that way and he didn't even catch on until he saw me smiling at my now husband (it was way too late by then).

        Hey, at least we will warn you. Can't say we don't warn you…although that will be forgotten too.

    3. (smile) Shall we prove if you're right, DeKeLa???

      "Only after we’ve sat our star player down several times to discuss his lacking performance, and made several suggestions of how you could improve and keep your star standing with the team….we’ve benched you, put you back out there and benched you again, and you still won’t play right..so, don’t act all surprised when you get traded." This was assimilated some time ago by observation of women, and now I do THE SAME to women. (smile) With a vengence.

      "…WE communicate very differently. We say one thing and you actually hear something else." This is why so men are confused and frustrated with women… Why so many women give their man REASON to block such women out–get to the BOTTOM LINE of the beef of… Say CLEARLY what the problem is about… And, of course, why so many women give men the REASON (amongst others) of the following…

      "[Women] are way bigger liars" Yes women are… And you just proved it… "I think Men lie more often and we [women lie better…" "…Better…" (with reverb) Isn't the point of deceit to…FOOL somebody?! Women can lie to their man and live that lie for YEARS. (Cheating is a WONDERFUL example.) Women can lie to their homegirls. (I'm going to smile and leave THAT alone.) But, most tragically, a woman can lie to HERSELF, and her "MAN" get trapped in the delusion. (Especially when it comes to "the kitty makes the rules" and "the dirt MEN do comes to the light"–those are the "in-phrases" amongst women apparently.) If kitty MAKES the rules, then kitty shouldn't BREAK the rules established (but does usually). And, I won't even start on karma b-tch-slapping women time after time arter time after time after…

      "The pefect man for a woman is a man with imperfections" I do and CONTINUE to laugh at this one. Question: IF the pefect man for a woman is a man with imperfections, why do dudes like me KEEP getting complaints about men being a mess? And, going BACK to the last paragraph to connect with this one, why do it seems women tend to ignore that they don't walk on water, EITHER? Just asking…

    4. "We are way bigger liarns – No, I think Men lie more often and we lie better….but, if you are lying more often then you are the biggest lier. period.

      YES!! The fact that I got away with the 2 lies I told and you were caught in all 10 of yours doesnt make me a bigger liar.

        1. @ Symbiotic

          Being a BAD liar has nothing to do with who lies MORE. If I tell one good lie, yet you tell ten bad lies, you are STILL THE BIGGEST LIAR.

        2. So… by your definition. If two people are always (insert crime) but only one gets caught all the time that makes the one that doesnt get caught a bigger criminal?

          I think guys are getting qualitative and quantitative mixed up!

        3. "…the one that doesnt get caught a bigger criminal…" Yep, EXACTLY!!! Believe it or not, every successful lie requires actually two. Every successful crime is actually two–the crime and the lie to cover up the crime. BUT, eventually, the crime gets discovered. Plus, I look at quality (or the lack thereof) more than quantity (or the lack thereof)… ESPECIALLY when it comes to relationships. A woman eventually destroys her home with a man if that house was built on a successful lie…

      1. Oh… BTW… One common thing said about me (by family AND women) is that I'm too honest for my own good. That tendency has "cheated" me of p-ssy, but I would rather lose to the p-ssy race yet keep my honor and gain respect than lie like a cheap rug. "…lie like a cheap rug …" (smile) That works on SO many levels…

    5. QueenT, Im goin in!!!

      Point #1

      What you're saying basically correlates with my point, so we do agree. Im not talking about the reason WHY you recruit, just the fact that you do. You breaking down motive inherently agrees to my point.

      #2

      "We Speak Your Language – That is not true. WE communicate very differently. We say one thing and you

      actually hear something else."

      I actually said "you CAN speak our language but CHOOSE not to" so…. I guess we can add that women don't listen to the list as well.

      #3

      "We are way bigger liarns – No, I think Men lie more often and we lie better….but, if you are lying more often then you are the biggest lier. period."

      Id rather a man lie about what time they are coming home, than a woman who lies about the baby being yours. The fact that you know about lying so intricately makes woment he lying jedis!

      #4

      " I spoon feed my information and I definitely don’t discuss what I do in the bedroom. I may come with an occasional dilemma to get some help with…but, I don’t tell all of my business."

      You must be the exception to the rule. I still say that even the most DISCREET women stil tell sh*t that men might not want their ladies friends to know!

      #5

      I agree with DeKaLa, you couldnt say "cosign" huh? lol

      Great points as always!

      1. *Side-eye* @ "I guess we can add that women don't listen to the list as well" …

        I'm calling #foul on these points being 'secrets'. Unless a man happens to be a social hermit, many of these 'insights' were apparent from when we both were kids. I still laugh when my little nephew tells me about being frustrated by those "icky" girls at school that like him, but get mad at him for no apparent reason. And for those who are a bit older — if you watched Boomerang, Love Jones, Two Can Play that Game, or Best Man — there is NO reason for a man to be caught unaware that these traits may be present in a woman.

        *"I see," said the blind man to the deaf woman. (Fav line of my father's)*

        As far as #4 – QueenT is not an anomoly. But allow me to expound: Quite often, a woman will tell her friends about as much as her pride will allow her. We will dish with each other on relationship highs & "woes" — but the really personal, hurtful, and potentially self-demeaning details — oh, that is saved for later … like after she has broken up with ol boy. e.g.:

        HomeGirl One: *crying* … and then I told him I couldn't do this anymore!

        HomeGirl Two: Wow, didn't see that coming — you guys seemed so solid. Is this really over?

        H1: Yeah … *sniff* … I didn't tell you this before but — this was the 3rd time I caught him cheating

        H2: …. oh.

  4. We are simple, yet complex.

    As long as a man respects me and doesn't be dishonest with me, we will live a happy life together.

    The moment either one of those two things changes, problems will arise.

    1. Yes, women are simple yet complex. As long as a WOMAN respects me and doesn’t be dishonest with me, we will live a happy life together. Ain't with that "want of me but not willing to do yourself" nonsense…

  5. "Women are WAY bigger liars than men, first of all. ". Horsedoodoo

    We are not bigger liars just BETTER at it and that's because we only lie when deemed necessary but men lie just because they can form a complete sentence. O__o

  6. Lol, this is a good post.

    Speaking to you guys is quite frustrating. I mean if you've known me for quite some time now do I really need to tell you that it irks the living daylights out of me when you do this or that? Although, I like to talk but saying the same thing over and over is annoying.

    Also, I totally agree about being challenged. If I can walk all over you then it's not going to work and if you're a wuss that can't deal with life problems then you DEFINTELY can deal with me. 

    1. "…I totally agree about being challenged. If I can walk all over you…" Shullbit… The next time you bump into a man who seems argumentative or who leaves you behind because you're too slow for his pace of progress, don't come complaining to men like me… Gotta speak for the dudes who end up being the ones who listen to women spilling their guts…

      1. Being argumentative and leaving me while I'm walking is not a man challeging me it's one being a douche towards me. When I say challenge I mean expose me to new things, express your thoughts on different topics that may be totally different from mine in a respectful manner, show me different sides of you and etc.

        1. My point is a man who chooses to express his thoughts on different topics that may be totally different from a woman's is usually seen AS argumentative. ESPECIALLY when he stands his ground.

      2. Symbiotic Loner, I'm going to need you to stop challenging every point along these lines because you feel as though we're all just talking out of our asses. A lot of women are able to carry on discussions and arguments with other human beings without seeing them as argumentative, and this is no different with significant others. For as long as someone doesn't challenge every damn point I make or decision/stance I take for the hell of it, he will not be considered as such. I appreciate differing opinions, and I'm actually someone who plays devil's advocate most of the time, so the odds are that I'll be at least somewhat understanding when we don't see eye to eye.

        All that said, please believe that the lady to whom you were responding and the author of the post have it right when they say that women do not want a doormat. It'd be cool to have someone with whom I agree most of the time, so that's not the issue. He would have to be able to voice his opinion when this is not the case, and stand his ground when necessary. Naturally, I like to have my way, but that doesn't mean that I should get it 100% of the time. Even the most kind-hearted person will inadvertently fall into the habit of taking advantage of a situation, so it's in any guy's best interest to realize that he shouldn't be the only one compromising for the sake of a relationship. That goes for both genders, really. I've heard some guys tell me that they "know/can tell" that I always have to have my way, and most of them never stood a chance because I could tell that they were the kind who would roll over for me to trample on their other side after I was done with one, were I so inclined. I'm all for being spoiled, but I definitely need someone who is not afraid to butt heads with me when we disagree. I can't have a man who is shy or reluctant to do so. Again, this doesn't mean that I enjoy having someone who will see to it that I develop a migraine every time he opens his mouth — if there's anything I enjoy in this world, it's a stress-free state of mind.

        1. lol. I'm amused at the irony of me telling someone to quit challenging others'/my stance in a post where I say that I welcome differing opinions.

        2. "…I’m going to need you to stop challenging every point along these lines because you feel as though we’re all just talking out of our asses…" Never said that or implied that. I just see things differently, and I'm NOT going to shut up on what I believe and feel. If you don't feel me, you can either speak up or don't say anything. Believe me, I've done BOTH on this site.

          I know that there are "… [a] lot of women are able to carry on discussions and arguments with other human beings without seeing them as argumentative." Didn't say all women are that way–I said a man vocal with his own individual opinion differing from a woman's is USUALLY seen as argumentative. BIG difference.

          What's that saying? "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything." I've fallen MANY times because I chose NOT to stand up or speak up for myself concerning women. Time's out for being a doormat anymore. Said it on this page many times… (smile) IF you read my comments…

          Isn't THAT ironic–you don't think it's sexy for a man to be a doormat, the author don't think it's sexy for a man to be a doormat, and the lady to whom I was responding didn't think it's sexy for a man to be a doormat… (smile) Oh… Left someone out… I also have learned that it's not sexy for a man to be a doormat, and I voiced accordingly. Repeating myself–going on.

          It's ironic that you had said "…It’d be cool to have someone with whom I agree most of the time, so that’s not the issue. He would have to be able to voice his opinion when this is not the case, and stand his ground when necessary. Naturally, I like to have my way, but that doesn’t mean that I should get it 100% of the time." You respect a man who puts his foot down, and one did…all over this page. Not going to wipe my feet, either. If you keep a dirty house, expect footprints when feet get put down.

          You and I BOTH enjoy a stress-free state of mind. (smile) But, we don't get our way all the time, do we? You said so in your response. Going on…

          I'm WELL aware of "…the irony of [youj] telling someone to quit challenging others’/my stance in a post where I say that I welcome differing opinions…" I'm going to smile and leave that alone…

        3. While I did note that it was ironic, it's two different kinds of challenging that are being discussed. My issue is with you calling BS when someone states that she agrees about the need to be challenged (in the sense of the voicing of differing opinions of what should & shouldn't be, as opposed to someone trying to tell me about myself) and does not wish to have someone that she can walk all over, especially since I'm of the same mind. THAT, I could classify as argumentative. It's one thing to simply say that most people regard men as argumentative when they are merely stating their point, and quite another thing to put someone in a position to have to defend what they know is true of themself. That was what my first couple of lines were in reference to.

          I don't agree with the fact that men voicing their opinion are usually considered argumentative – if anything, women usually catch the short end of that stick. Nonetheless, even if it were true, it still doesn't justify you calling BS on a particular woman stating her stance on the issue, regardless of what you may have witnessed. "Putting [your] foot down" hasn't a thing to do with this.

        4. "…Nonetheless, even if it were true, it still doesn’t justify you calling BS on a particular woman stating her stance on the issue, regardless of what you may have witnessed…." I call it as I see. Point blank. (smile) I'll remember what you said the next time a woman calls a man's stance on an issue BS… Continuing… "…'Putting [your] foot down' hasn’t a thing to do with this." (smile) If you say so…

        5. Ugh… Maybe I need to clarify on what I called BS in the comment…

          “…I totally agree about being challenged. If I can walk all over you…” That was quoted. The BS called comes in when a woman who wants to be challenged COMPLAINS to another man about standing with her man while he faces his challenges, when a woman who wants to be challenged COMPLAINS to another man about a man who stands his ground when contradicing said woman's opinion as being argumentative, and when a woman who doesn't want a doormat wants a man to speak his mind–to a certain extent. THAT'S the BS seen, and THAT'S the BS called.

        6. @tellylonglegs: Thank you kindly.

          @ Symbiotic, Perhaps stance was the wrong term for me to use. You don't seem to realize that what you are challenging is essentially someone's knowledge and understanding of herself. I can't tell you how annoying it is when people claim to know me more than I know myself, and this is along those lines, although I am presently speaking with no ounce of annoyance (although it may have to do with the fact that your response wasn't initially directed at me). You haven't the slightest clue who tellylonglegs is for you to be able to confidently assert that what she has said is BS. She was not stating a general stance on an issue, but what works for her as an individual. It's like me telling you that I can't get with someone who has bad grammar for personal reasons, and you telling me that that's BS. We're not discussing the reasons behind it; we're talking about what works and what doesn't as a matter of personal preference. Let me find out you're trying to put your foot down on my preferences.

        7. "…I can’t tell you how annoying it is when people claim to know me more than I know myself…" When you claimed I was calling BS what I WASN'T calling BS, I though the same thing… Point blank. But, since I tend to be misunderstood, I've learned to try to overlook misunderstandings… Unless it requires explaining.

          "…I TOTALLY agree about being challenged" That ONE word–"totally"–sparked it with me…

          Next… "…The BS called comes in when a woman who wants to be challenged complains to another man about standing with her man while he faces his challenges, WHEN a woman who wants to be challenged complains to another man about a man who stands his ground when contradicing said woman’s opinion as being argumentative, and WHEN a woman who doesn’t want a doormat wants a man to speak his mind–to a certain extent. That's the BS seen, and that's the BS called…"

          Please pay attention to the word in caps… "WHEN" (with reverb) WHEN a woman complains even though she says she "…totally agree about being challenged", I call BS. Point blank. You haven’t the slightest clue who Symbiotic Loner is, either. He works OVERTIME in the "women who need a man to confide in" department… (Remember? "…Gotta speak for the dudes who end up being the ones who listen to women spilling their guts…" was said. That's what I had meant by that.) WHEN complaints come in from women who say they enjoy a man who challenges them but seem to mean contrary by complaining about standing beside such a man, BS is seen and called. And such complaints do come in…

      3. “…The BS called comes in when a woman who wants to be challenged complains to another man about standing with her man while he faces his challenges, WHEN a woman who wants to be challenged complains to another man about a man who stands his ground when contradicing said woman’s opinion as being argumentative, and WHEN a woman who doesn’t want a doormat wants a man to speak his mind–to a certain extent. That’s the BS seen, and that’s the BS called…”

        I'm going to need you to STOP being that man that your friends go to when they're having men issues because its obviously affecting your ability to not be bitter.

        fyi, I rarely talk to my guy friends about the issues that I have in my relationship.

        1. If I was TRULY bitter, I would have been either gay or with a women of some other race… Yelling "all black woman ain't sh*t", BTW… But, since that hasn't happened…

  7. True…women rarley kick a man to the curb without having a sucker in waiting.

    But my feeling has always been, "OK go ahead and play yourself." Instead of taking time to get over a relationship; to assess your role in its failure and think about how you can be a better partner next time……..you go right into some other relationship with some clown we knew about anyway cause subconciously you hope it will hurt the current boyfriend.

    Whatever…….six months later she'll be tryin to get back. Or maybe das just my story ROFL

    1. "True…women rarley kick a man to the curb without having a sucker in waiting."

      Hey… "sometimes the best way to get over somebody is to get under another."

      1. But it doesn't really help you get over anything. It just prolongs the pain really. That's why I say you really just playin yourself when you do that.

        To get over a relationship takes half the time you were in it ALONE. So if you were in a two year relationship you need a year alone to get over it. When you slide right in with the next man you just prolong the whole process.

        1. I was just kidding but once a woman is looking for someone else believe me… she is over the relationship.

          "To get over a relationship takes half the time you were in it ALONE."

          NO! That what it takes for you to get over a relationship (God forbid you are in a 10yr realtionship that doesnt work out). I know for me its the act of moving on… which is done by seeing other people.

        2. @ Kema

          They don't know, don't try and and school il Duce.

          Gone Already by Faith says it all….

          Not saying its right to do this, but I know I can get over someone even while in the relationship. It's something I learned about myself in my last relationship.

          However, I give enough warnings, so if those are taken lightly…joke will be on him. No one should take their partner for granted thinking they will always be there and that is what this boils down too.

        3. I'm not sayin you can't go into another relationship. But that doesn't mean you are over somebody. It just means you don't like being alone and you use people to get you through certain times in your life.

          Trust me, every dude has been in a relationship with a brawd that is obviously not over her last dude. We usually just get the pu$$y and recognize the relationship is not really goin anywhere.

          To be honest, not to throw shots, but what yall describin sounds a little immature to me. If a relationship is over…than end it.

          Slippin from one dude to the next is really just a mechanism to protect your feelings and interests.

          I'm just sayin…….can we call it what it really is.

        4. @ il Duce

          Come on now, the only person upset about a person moving on, would be the person that LOST that person. If I feel ready to take on the next person, who should say how long I should wait? And why I am waiting if I am over him…is it to give the bad dude a chance to come back…no bueno.

          Immature is a man thinking he can treat his woman like crap and thinking she will stay. How fast she moves on is neither here nor there. That's doesn't matter, because we all know people who slipped right into another relationship and somehow that relationship IS successful. It does not always work out or fail. It is what it is.

          And yes I agree, it should end before you move on. It did end for me (without me sleeping with anyone or even talking to anyone) It took me little while to actually talk to my now husband…but I did it. And you better know that my ex kept trying to get back in…but he used all of his chances and therefore lost (he still hates me to this day for leaving him…lol…going on 4 years) He had something great and didn't realize it soon enough…that's is not my issue tho.

        5. Not sure if I agree with that rule. Sometimes, a person needs that time to reevaluate his/her own self alone and in relationships. And sometimes it's not you, it's HIM (or HER).

          I broke up with one boyfriend because he needed to GO and I just happened to meet my next boyfriend soon after. I wasn't prolonging the pain jumping into another relationship because the reality was, I WAS JUST OVER IT. It's over and done, time to move on. Didn't think the last boy's douchery should keep me from a good relationship with a good man.

    2. That's funny. I was thinking that about men, not women. To my knowledge, women spend alot of down time being alone. I thought men were the ones who are constantly smashing something. Hmmm…interesting.

      1. I see it more in women. Women hardly ever move on without having someone alone. They usually have a rebound guy.

    3. See Beef Bacon das why I don't like dating brawds wit kids…..they swear they over a dude…..but then you still spend an hour on the phone three times a a week arguing wit the bamma……..supposedly over the kids. Really? You over him? LOL

      Too many brawds out here still stuck on dudes from their past cause they never take the time to self assess and develop.

      1. @ il Duce

        I agree with you about that. I don't want to argue with my SO let alone some dude from my past. That why he's in my past. I don't have the energy for that.

        Those women don't know how to handle their business. Baby daddies are a reality and some of them like to make the women's life hell, but if she allows that…there is usually more to the picture, she may still be feeling him as well.

        In addition, it is not just people having children either. People who are not over you in general will use anything to talk/argue/chat/ with you about. I have seen a woman use a house as a reason to call a dude that left her.

  8. well said streetz, well said. Although, I think all men know women talk about us, but I don't think women know that all men don't talk about them to other men. I do my confiding with other women…who are all out of state…and can't possibly leak stuff to anyone who matters.

  9. Yes to number one. I made up my mind on Valentines night that it just wasn't gonna work out, and for the last two or three weeks I've been envisioning my self back in my single outfit.

    The harping HAS stopped, when we take a break during sex I don't even go back to finish, I've been back on the lounge/ happy hour scene with my girlfriends more, I even catch myself looking at other guys more.

    After many chances, and slippage, and verbalizing my wishes/needs, it's obvious (to me anyway) what's coming down the pike. Women are VERY calculating about making their next move, and I guess I've been preparing for mine.

  10. OMG Streetz, please stop this madness! lolol Why you putting all of our business out there? You aint right. First off, yes we can be free agents but SO DO MEN. Ya'll invented that sh*t. Women are known for ending it before we move on and I can't say the same for men. Ya'll need a constant flow of poon so you'll find new poon and then kick the new poon to the curb. It's called cheating. What women do is get a "friend" and if we see he has potential to be with, then we'll send you packing. It's very diff, trust me. lolol

    Sadly yes, I am a master manipulator. I can't help it. I'm just good at getting my way. Call it a gift. I try to use my powers for good and not evil though. But I'm not a liar, far from it. Yes when we choose to lie, we're better at it but you'd be surprised at how much more honest we are because we're more emotional. Okay maybe I'm trying to justify everything. lol Good post….oh and who likes a doormat? Not I. You can have tons of imperfections as long as you're s.exy and laying the pipe right. I'm kidding…no I'm not.

    1. Penetration or no penetration….once you make another man your friend you have become intimate with him. That would be cheating.

      1. @ il Duce

        It sucks to learn that women do the same stuff men have been doing for years, huh? There is always that possibility no matter the gender.

        We don't live in vacuums, so men and women alike see potential mates on a daily basis. The only difference is, some women will at least TRY to stay honest, whereas men slip into strange nanas randomly as if they have no choice.

        For ME, I won't have sex or even entertain another dude if I know that's were I want to be. I don't even see other men when I am invested. It's once I know it’s over, that other people start to catch my eyes. At that point, I am already out of the relationship….you just maybe too crazy for me to tell you in person (lol). I don't let weeks or months go by at that point. I leave because that is only fair.

        1. @Grand Nagus

          Um…no. I haven't and won't ever sleep with 2 dudes at one time. (NEW POST lol) I said find a "friend". That fine guy at the gym that you ignored in your bliss…maybe start a convo, start chillin, etc. If you like what you see, THEN you leave the man.

          @Beef Bacon

          I'm going to start charging you rent for living in my head…and trust the rent is too [email protected] high. lol I cosign all dat der. My loyalty runs deeep. If I'm eye ballin another man, it's already over and I dropped nuff hints or even said it. I don't play games and wear truth like a snug blanket.

  11. Lmao @ Helen of Troy. She was a bad bische! I'm tryna get like her.

    Good post Streetz-y. I refuse to incriminate myself so I'mma stop here.

    El fin.

  12. Wow, that last one was so on point!! I've been trying to find the right way to say that forever, but that's it!! It is incredibly important to see a man face adversity and triumph and we definitely want to be challenged. Agreed!

  13. "The perfect man for women is a man full of imperfections "

    Well said, well summed, and completely on point. Since I realize how imperfect I am, I can't really stand someone who is "perfect" (in their own head). I'm not going to try to compete with you to be more perfect or anything like that, plus overcoming is sexy (look at how many women that bought MLK!)

        1. You're better than me. I've been with one guy who's like that and I know I can't deal with that. Next time I see the signs I'm running.

  14. I co-sign this entire post, specially the part about us being free agents, being best general managers, I like to be challenged, and yes some of my friends know SOME of the things… and the things they know are the good things, you know, the kind that makes them a little green with envy 😉

  15. I heard Michael Baisden talk about this "Challenge Theory" a few years back. That women like to be challenged. I'm sorry, just sound likes another excuse for bad behavior. I'm supposed to put up with your mood swings and irrational thoughts cause you want to be challenged. Ufck dat……you know what I want from a women. Salaam…Peace. I know peaceful, easy going, non-game playing women are rare but they do exist. Thank God for the few I've met. If I want a challenge I'll buy a rubix cube.

  16. Running on CPT this a.m. but you know I already big-upped this post over on the Twitter brother streetz. I'll add my 2 cents and some change…

    First off, GREATEST POST OF ALL TIME! Yes, I'm still referencing K. West in 2011, deal with it. I agree with everything so I'll only address three of your points.

    When women are done with relationships, they start testing the market like free agents…

    I agree but I think this is more limited to younger and/or immature women, which might be one in the same but not necessarily. A real woman breaks up with a man she's not feeling because she isn't afraid to be alone. Period. I feel women who usually use this method jump from relationship to relationship because they can't stand being alone for more than 31 days. You can usually identify these women because they haven’t been single since they were 12, have > 3 kids by > 2 baby daddies, and/or have been married and divorced > 2 times.

    Women know how to speak our language, but they choose otherwise!

    Women no "spreken de English" ~ (c) Madagascar. I wrote a post on this topic TODAY in fact: Men Are Dumb: And It's Women's Fault http://www.WisdomIsMisery.com #Plug

    It got so long winded I had to break it across two posts. Women are the most hint dropping-est no telling-the-straight-uping-est creatures on Earth. Women would really rather leave "clues" like I'm suppose to Sherlock Holmes my way into understanding why they do what they do when they do what they did. Aye….WIM has better things to do.

    That can basically be summed up in one of my many favorite quotes, "I love women but they are annoying" True story!

    The perfect man for women is a man full of imperfections

    THANK YOU!!!! Chris Rock spoke on this at length so there's no need for me to go into too much detail but women – regardless of what they might tell you – DO NOT want a perfect man, at all. You know what women say about perfect men? "Girl, I like him but he too nice."

    Too? Nice? How can a man be, too? nice? *throws hands up*

    Women want a man that's never hit them but they're never quite sure if he'll never hit them. He should be a gentlemen and a jerk. Strong yet sensitive. Lets her be an independent woman while taking care of her every need. Follows but knows when to lead. Thug but educated. Educated but not a know it all. Good conversationalist but doesn’t talk to much. In other words, women want everything and nothing at exactly the same time.

    – FIN –

    1. “Girl, I like him but he too nice.” LOL… Man, do you have ANY idea how many times women have said that to me on different levels?! LOL… Is THAT why a lot of women do that?! I was talking to a female friend of mine a few days ago, and she TRIED to break it down to me… She said similar to what you said in that last sentence, BTW. Not perfect, but apparently packaged together enough to be scary, huh? LOL…

    2. "…How can a man be too nice?" Gather 'round… Time to share some horror stories…

      1: Holding a woman you're in love with…while she's talking about another man… OUCH…

      2: Holding a f-ck buddy ALL NIGHT while you and her are naked…no sex going because "she just wants to be held"… A f-ck buddy?!?! Nice, nice, nice, nice…

      3: Taking a woman to dinner during the first date…then she talking about bringing her four kids along around the second course… And the dude's just going with the flow… Nice, nice, nice, nice…

      Got plenty of others. And women wonder why I'm so cynical and skeptical. I've been in those situations in what seem another lifetime ago… And, I'd be admned it I head back there again…

        1. EVERY woman I share that story with (just gave the jist of it here) says either of TWO things… "D-mn, Symb, that's f-cked up" or "Symb, she knows she won't find a man like THAT anywhere else"… (shrug) You get burned, you heal, you move on… (smile) You struggle to do and to be better…

    3. "Women want a man that’s never hit them but they’re never quite sure if he’ll never hit them. He should be a gentlemen and a jerk. Strong yet sensitive. Lets her be an independent woman while taking care of her every need. Follows but knows when to lead. Thug but educated. Educated but not a know it all. Good conversationalist but doesn’t talk to much."

      Let me add……. Looks like Boris but lays it down like RayRay

      ^^^^^Now this is The Perfect Man^^^^^

      ikid. ikid.. umm not really. *lol*

    4. LOL! Okay…whatever. I won't even argue with this. I'll just walk away from this one.

      *twirls back into thread Julie Andrews style*

      Wait! You know what? No one likes to be alone. Plus you can be in a relationship and still have "me time" where you reflect and what not. And there is such a thing as too nice. It's called a door mat. And why ya'll mens gotta be putting women out there today? You know you can't live without us. Stop this madness.

      Okay, good points…Bye.

  17. Women want a man that’s never hit them but they’re never quite sure if he’ll never hit them. He should be a gentlemen and a jerk. Strong yet sensitive. Lets her be an independent woman while taking care of her every need. Follows but knows when to lead. Thug but educated. Educated but not a know it all. Good conversationalist but doesn’t talk to much. In other words, women want everything and nothing at exactly the same time.

    __________________

    See this is why I decided to just do me. You'll drive yourself crazy tryin to give most women what they think they want…..today…..it'll be somethin different tomorrow.

    1. Man what!

      I have a friend that doesn't have the best luck with dudes but she says she likes a guy that is "Ike Like". Yeah…I keep telling her she needs to get out of that cuz Ike Like turns into Ike before you know it.

    2. [email protected] skippy. lol Aint nothing like the inner thug….yes not inner child but inner thug. The guy who is laid back, sophisticated and manly YET you know there's a hood n*gga dweling on the inside so you don't push it. When he gets real mad, you see the rage in his eyes like he wants to hit you…but doesn't. Instead he beats it up and has you yelling out "OW SORRY".

      Whooooo *fans self* Good times. Same thing like ya'll want a lady freak like church h0e…same thang.

      1. "Same thing like ya’ll want a lady freak like church h0e…same thang" Not really. Female hos are just speed bumps placed in a man's life to teach him to pump his brakes and ride slow as he learn to cruise looking for a REAL woman. Don't really dig church hopping for f-ck buddies…

  18. I don't know if we can call these secrets. I think that this could have easily been called, 5 secrets about men that women must know. I'll admit, i'm the Isiah Thomas of scouting. I pick them early and I know that the woman is going to develop into a star. I'm not married, so obviously something is going wrong with the great draft picks that i've been having over the years, lol.

    Women know how to speak our language, but they choose otherwise!

    Here's a fly on the wall quote from just about every man with his boys. "So I asked her what's wrong, she said, "Nothing." So you know what I did? I acted like nothing was wrong and went about my business. If she wants something she better speak up!" You see we speak your language, we just don't want you to know we speak your language. There's football, strip clubs, and nights on the town with our boys to be had.

    Women and Kaiser Soze: SAME PEOPLE!

    How the hell you think Most keeps disappearing on these garden tools?!

    Women and their friends know everything about you and talk crazily.

    Men gossip more than women do.

    The perfect man for women is a man full of imperfections

    Cigar please… You know what men call the perfect girl. Wifey material. Funny thing about wifey material: Men don't date them initially they want to keep them on reserve for later. Well… what ends up happening is a lot of crazy ish… Real talk, word to my mother on this, wifey material is like Kevin Garnett winning the championship. "Anything is possible!" yeah, tell that to Karl Malone. Here's what actually happens:

    (1) He gets that jumpof pregnant

    (2) He figures out that wifey material ain't gonna f*ck him like non-wifey material is going to f*ck him

    (3) They convinced they can turn a ho into a housewife.

    (4) This is the harsh reality… most men end up wifing the chick who just stayed around… they never really end up with wifey material, they end up with the chick who just hung around the longest. Trust me on that. There's a chick who got wifed because she hung around, there's a chick who got married because she hung around. Men do have a conscience and we are lazy, we'll fall victim.

    NOW… should he make it out of that guantlet, he's assuming that his "wifey material" didn't get married yet, but wait…

    Theorem 1.2 about Sex, Dating and Relationship –

    Because most people will see bad people experience great results, they will abandon their good ways and crossover to the dark side. Most men will find this out in their freshman year of college. Women will find out after logging into Facebook to find out the man they've been sleeping with for years is now engaged.

    So thing is men can save themselves a whole lot of trouble just by dating a chick with some issues or imperfections. Perfect girl, probably not gonna happen. They'll end up walking away from the game like Jerry Sloan.

    1. This wasnt meant to be flipped. This was meant to show what women do that men might not be aware, Its an easy argument to say "Guys do that too"

      You also didnt catch my Kaiser Sose point. Its about the swindle not about fading away. To fade away is simple. to swindle is complex.

      Lets not take the easy way out and put the onus on men.

      1. I'm not trying to flip it, i'm not even putting the onus on men. I'm just saying that both of us do it. And about Soze, it wasn't the disapearing act, it's convincing women that he is something that he's not. That's the biggest swindle and that's how he was able to walk out of the police station and walk down the street unarmed and without bodyguards. He had convinced everyone different.

    2. Hear, hear.

      Although I do have to give it to the men.. on average, your gender is more tight-lipped about relationships when truly invested in a woman.

  19. '“…I totally agree about being challenged. If I can walk all over you…” That was quoted. The BS called comes in when a woman who wants to be challenged COMPLAINS to another man about standing with her man while he faces his challenges, when a woman who wants to be challenged COMPLAINS to another man about a man who stands his ground when contradicing said woman’s opinion as being argumentative, and when a woman who doesn’t want a doormat wants a man to speak his mind–to a certain extent. THAT’S the BS seen, and THAT’S the BS called."'

    That's great and all, except that, once again, you have no idea who you were quoting. Picture you telling me that you want a nice, sweet girl, and me calling BS because all the dudes I see on my block go for the bad ass heifers. As I said previously, there are a lot of women who take a man stating his opinion for just that. You somewhat agreed when you said that not all women see opinionated men as argumentative, so how do you think your post sounds in the event that tellylonglegs happens to be one of those understanding ones? There have to have been some assumptions made prior to your post.

    1. "…Picture you telling me that you want a nice, sweet girl, and me calling BS because all the dudes I see on my block go for the bad ass heifers. As I said previously, there are a lot of women who take a man stating his opinion for just that. You somewhat agreed when you said that not all women see opinionated men as argumentative, so how do you think your post sounds in the event that tellylonglegs happens to be one of those understanding ones? There have to have been some assumptions made prior to your post."

      Picture you telling me that you want a nice, sweet dude, and you calling BS to such a nice, sweet dude being nice and sweet because all the women you saw on your block go for the bad a*s dudes. I'm bombarded by such every day…So, how do you think such a post sounds in the event that Symbiotic Loner happens to be one of those black men who tries to do what's right? (shrug)

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