What’s good everyone,
The award winning Single Black Mail series returns and returns in a BIG way! Today we have a classic email for you, one that I think we can all relate to or have heard before. So big, that we will drop the letter, and let the SBMassive assist in the comments, including the writers! Check it out and enjoy!!
One night, I’m at the club with my boys. One of them, let’s call him Corey meets this chick (lets call her Samantha) and her homegirls. She has this one friend, a pretty dark skinned girl, but she wasn’t my type. I like chicks that are LHTRB (long hair, think red bone). Corey & Samantha hit off and I go with him to meet up with her b/c she was staying with the dark skinned chick, let’s call her Stacy, while she’s in town. So when we get to the house, Stacy opens the door and I was like damn, she looks better than I thought. She tells me how she just bought her home and gives me a tour to show me the renovations she’s making. They cooked dinner, we watched the game and by the end of the night I was feeling her.
A few months had gone by we were together pretty much every day. Let me just say this, I get it in. I usually spend about week at the most with a chick and that’s it. I travel often with my job, so usually I meet a chick on the road and deal with her in her city and I’m out. I’m not the relationship type, PERIOD so spending so much time with this girl was a stretch for me, but I was willing to do it. She was so different from the other chicks I mess with, usually its some girl with a big ass, I spend money on her, she can’t hold a conversation, but gives good head. But Stacy was ambitious, set goals for herself, had a real career and could cook her ass off. She always had a smile on her face and genuinely cared about people. She grew on me and I felt myself falling her and it scared the shit out of me. I could tell she was falling for me too, she started to make everything about us. I would be an ass and try to cancel dates and she would move her entire schedule around just to spend time with me. She did what could to accommodate me and make sure I was happy. Something in me had changed because of Stacy and as good as it felt I couldn’t take it and I need to be my old self.
An opportunity came up with my job to be out of town for a few months and I tried my hardest be on that project. I told her like two days before I was leaving, I knew it hurt her but I needed to get my old self back. When I left she called, left a few messages but I never called her back. I wanted a clean break. I went back to my old ways. When the project was over I came back home and thought about her. I drove past her house one afternoon saw her car and called her, asked if I could come in since I was outside already. Her voice was different, but I thought it was just because I was an ass to her and there was tension, but I knew I could talk her into getting over that. When she opened the door it looked like the life had been sucked out of her, she tried to sound happy and smile and ask me about my project but I wanted to know what was wrong. It felt like I was pulling teeth, but she finally told me what was wrong.
After I left a friend (this sneaky motherf*ucker who would always be at her house “studying” since she was in grad school and he was in law school, but both of them said it was strictly platonic) told her that he could “ease the pain I put her though”. Long story short, she’s about 6 weeks pregnant and he wants her to abort it because the girlfriend he never told her he had would probably leave him. Now I know for any other man this would be a RED FLAG TO LEAVE NOW!!! As much as my mind told me to leave, my heart wouldn’t let me. Somehow I felt responsible, so I stayed until she fell asleep later that night, I watched her sleep for a while turned on her alarm system and left.
That was about a week ago and honestly I feel fucked up on the inside. I feel like I had the chance to be in love with this amazing woman who was everything I ever wanted and I fucked it up. I didn’t protect her or love her the way I should have. I had the chance to man up and be her hero, but I let her down and I can’t say enough about how fucked up I feel on the inside. I think about what we could’ve had by now and its getting to me. Honestly the first thought that came into my head was that that baby growing in her should be mine. I want to be there, I want to experience that journey with her and be the man she needs. I think since I feel that way about her, it must mean that I more in love with her than what I thought. I want to step up to the plate and make her situation right. My boys are telling me that I am being stupid and need to let her be, but I don’t know. Let me know what y’all think b/c I don’t know if I’m tripping or what?
What Would You Do?