Home Advice 5 Things Men Say That You Can Take With a Grain of Salt

5 Things Men Say That You Can Take With a Grain of Salt

Not included on this list: "I would never date a white girl."

In my former life, you could have expected a post called, “5 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Listen to Women.”  They way I’m feeling these days, eh… you may see that post one day, but it doesn’t really interest me, probably would have only written it for your entertainment.  (This is an example of seeing the change in Dr. J, congratulate it, or he’ll think it’s pointless.)

Check out today’s mix from @CarverTheGreat, it’s called William Leonard Roberts, and it’s a nicely put together mix of Rick Ross tracks.  A tracklist can be found below, but download it here, or stream below:

Honestly, I don’t get upset when women make statements that I don’t agree with, or that I think are false.  I get upset when I’m listening to a woman explain something to me about her man and I’m caught between laughter and blurting out, “That fool is lying!”  Even in my own conversations with men, I find myself looking across the table with my best Bill Duke expression thinking, “This fool is full of ish.”

Me: I find myself troubled when I look at pictures of Rosa Acosta.
Him: She seem bad, but if you had money you would probably think different.
Me: I don’t have money though.
Him: She doesn’t do it for me, she comes across as ghetto.
Me: I don’t know what you’re talking about, you would wife down Rosa if she gave you two seconds before she went to the ladies’ room.
Him: Nah, I would never wife a girl down like that.  That’s not wifey material right there.
Me: [Thinks to himself, “Negro I’ve seen who you date and I know that your standards are way lower than you’re proclaiming right now. Rosa Acosta would easily be the most attractive women you’ve ever dated in your life and you can go head with all that bullsh*t.”]

I’m well aware that the mention of the name, “Rosa Acosta” leaves a sour taste in a lot of women’s mouths.  If the way men gush over Rosa bothers you, make this list “Six things…” and make that the sixth thing you can take with a grain of salt from a man.  If not, let’s move on to my list.

  1. They don’t like implants. – I can’t count the amount of conversations that I’ve had with men and women where men claim that they don’t find implants or plastic surgery attractive.  I think it was the big homie who said, “Natural breasts or Fake breasts? Trick question, the answer is breasts.”  That’s actually the gospel brought to your front door by Wisdom Is Misery and it’s true.  Men might claim to think that but when it comes down to it, they don’t mean that.  If non-matching panties don’t ruin the mood, then ass shots don’t either.  Seriously, stop and think for a moment of what a dude would do forced with the decision to take something down and his thought process was inundated with, “I’m not sure how I feel about ass shots.”
  2. They mind if you got a sex tape. – Recently, video vixen and model Suelyn Medeiros released a sex tape.  I’ll just speak for myself, it had no effect on how I view her.  In fact, it only made my slight obsession a little worse.  It could be Suelyn or Kim Kardashian, it doesn’t matter, that tape doesn’t have anything to do with a man’s decision.  Of course, he’ll tell you that he wouldn’t date a girl like that, but that’s because he doesn’t want you thinking that he’s attracted to high-end women with no class.  But in the words of the late great Patrice O’Neal, “Be a dirty filthy whore.”  Do you really think it matters that she has a sex tape?  I got a friend who was using his girl’s laptop and came across a folder with the title, “[Her ex’s name] Pictures.”  He clicked on it and it was a video in there of some dude and his girl doing a Mr. Marcus & Karrine Steffens impersonation.  He watched the whole thing and never told his girl he found it.  Anytime she didn’t want to put out, he knew he could just watch that video.
  3. Their credit is above 800. – Men like to boast about their credit score because women want to know their credit score.  In reality, “I got a couple past due bills I won’t get specific.”  I’ll keep it 100 and funky, it’s almost impossible to get it above 800 unless you’ve never made a mistake in your life.  Raise your hand if you had roommates in college or in early adulthood that may have left you ass’ed out on a couple utility bills?  Raise your hand if you ever had a “I just ain’t got it” moment in your life?  Raise your hand if you carry a 30-day past due balance on your cell phone bill because you know that on the 31st day is when they turn it off?  Yeah, 1x is the death of persona.  Raise your hand if you won’t pay your rent until the 10th this month?  Christmas and New Year’s threatening the entire month of January’s bills?  800 credit score, my arse.
  4. They want a supermodel.“I mean I’m not being picky, She don’t even have to a big ol’ ass you know, Just something well proportioned to her body, You know a nice little tail you know.” – Andre 3000.  Nothing could be closer to the truth.  There are only a few men out there who really want to date a supermodel, I can’t find them.  Next time you are at a nightclub or strip club, let me know if you see any men in awe over the super tall and skinny women in there.  Nope, not going to happen.  Men want something they can reach out and grab, it’s like Toys R Us, we like grabbing the toy and touching to see how it works.  En Vogue had it right.  Put down the fruit bowl, and pick up a bowl of ice cream.

    In the middle of authoring this post, I had an epiphany.  Thought i’d share it with you today.  I always thought that sex for a man was completely unfair because you have to focus on NOT doing something.  That’s just horribly frustrating.  Well, I imagine that for women trying to have TNA without ever getting to the point of fat, has got to be the female equivalent.

  5. They don’t cheat. – Asking a man if he’s ever cheated is like asking a woman how many men she’s slept with.  You have to ask the question several times and multiple ways to get a straight answer out of her.  “Have you ever slept with another woman while you had another woman who was referring to you as her boyfriend?  Wait, do you think that having sex outside of your relationship whether meaningful or not is considered cheating?  Man, just give me your definition of cheating so I can understand your answers.”  Some of the greatest men to ever walk this planet happened to have some faults and cheated once or twice.  It happens, the men will keep this to ourselves and you young ladies keep your real body counts to yourselves too.
See Also:  Rantings of an SBM

Every man who says one of these statements is not lying, but if someone held a gun to your head and asked you to bet your life on it, “Always pick, “He’s lying!””  This list isn’t all inclusive, so if you have a few others that you would like to add feel free to list them below in the comments.  I took a handful of the most popular ones that drive me crazy, I’m sure you’ve got a few that bother you just as much.

– Dr. J

Today’s Tracklist: Tracklist: 1. Here I Am, 2. All I Really Want, 3. No. 1, 4. Hello Good Morning, 5. Break My Heart, 6. Fly Together, 7. Magnificient, 8. Aston Martin Music, 9. Super High, 10. I Love My Bitches — Check out Carver The Great at his personal website, where you can also find booking information and more music!


  1. "Man, she let me f— within the first day/week of meeting her, I can't girlfriend a chick like that." Two months later girlfriend and baby due this month. Who you trying to fool besides yourself? Why lie? I don't understand.

    1. I've heard women and men say that sometimes the chemistry or vibe is off the chain…and one thing leads to another. If it's a case such as that then a relationship at some point down the line doesn't seem hard to fathom.

      On the other hand, if y'all just hooked up at the club(yup! he knocked it down in the bathroom) and he fed that line…I'm sure most people would eat it up. I know I couldn't fathom someone taking someone they popped off with like that too serious…but at the same time…anything is possible when you're dealing with people. Ya know?
      My recent post What the Hell You Mean My Sex is Wack?!

  2. Going along with the implants thing, I hate when men say they “prefer girls who don’t wear make up. The natural look.” Oh God. Like, just shut up, you lyin ass nigga. But all the girls you’ve dated wear a significant amount of make up. The saddest part is that when dudes say these things, I’m not sure that they’re tryin to pull the wool over anyone’s eyes or anything like that (although that’s most probably true with the credit score one), they’ve literally lied to themselves.

    1. lol, they just like pretty girls. If she's pretty first thing outta bed, even better-but if it takes makeup to get there, they aren't leaving. Good one, although the way you worded it, they're correct…I mean who doesn't PREFER natural beauty. I prefer a man that does all the cleaning and can financially support the entire household, but I'm not walking away from a man over some dishes!

      1. "they just like pretty girls. If she's pretty first thing outta bed"

        This is my test…if the face is dope in the am then shes INN!

        1. When do ya'll decide this though? Like if ya'll were out all night drinking at the club or whatever and then you see her when she wakes up, she WILL look busted after only three hours of sleep but if it was after a night of eating early and going to bed at ten and waking up after seven or eight hours, she would look a lot better. Is there a grading curve?

        2. na ugly is ugly if she look good regardless, 3 hours of sleep wont have her go from Gabieral Union to Whoopi Goldberg.

          Some girls cake on make up and weave so thick that if you washed it all of their face they would look like a whole new person.

        3. "3 hours of sleep wont have her go from Gabieral Union to Whoopi Goldberg."

          Laughing Out Loud!!!!

          You right tho.

        4. Guys be having these archaic ass stringent ass imaginary rules about beauty. "If she looks good in the morning, she pretty…" "Ugly is ugly…"

          Like, I get it. Some of y'all been hoodwinked in a dimly lit bar by bitches with weave and makeup but come on. I'm a "pretty girl" but I can literally go from a 1 to a 10 in a day. I don't know why. I just have range like that lol. And its not make up that makes the difference, I hardly wear make up, but it just is what it is.

        5. typically during the courting process…we can usually judge natural pretty vs makup pretty after a date or two…i know i can

        6. IDK Smilez I think there can be a difference. I mean, that morning puffy face is real. My husband has said I’m beautiful in the morning and for the most part I believe him but when I go to the mirror and see that my nose is greasy and my eyes are almost swollen shut because I got very little sleep, I’m thinking this ninja is full of sh@t.

        7. aww thats so cute … lol

          I mean theres a different but not so extreme that when you and him wake up next to each other he has to double back and be like "What the h3ll".

        8. *thinks back* He might have done a double take a couple of times. Seriously. And don't let me forget to take off some mascara, it just looks like Shrek got into a fight. Sidenote: I don't wear a lot of makeup because I was under the impression that my hubby thought I looked good without it but I was inspired by Max to wear it more often and now he gives me more compliments. So, score on that and thanks to Max.

    2. I typically tweet quotes on twitter. They are typically things I choose to leave out of a post because of how spiteful it might be viewed. And basically, me and my boy were having a conversation about chicks who don't wear makeup and he said, "I don't get it, are you trying to prove a point?" I think a lot of guys just don't realize that there are very few natural things about women. They put a lot into how they look. A little makeup can go a long way. Now I will say this is different for sisters and everyone else. If you've ever dated a Persian chick and woke up and she didn't have on eyeliner anymore… it can be startling. But yeah, I'm all about her just looking her best, however, she gets to that, I ain't tripping. Somebody told me once, "But Sofia Vergara looks like crap without her makeup"

      My response, "Why would I hang out with her if she ain't got makeup on?"
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

    3. I don't normally put on make-up unless I'm going out or whatever, and because I was friends with my SO first before doing other stuff, he hardly ever saw me with make-up. Then when we were going on our first official date I put on make-up and I was like, "don't I look good now" and he's like yea, but kinda quiet about it and reluctant to say more. So I asked him "you don't like it when I wear make-up?" and he said no, because it makes me look completely different. And he liked the way I looked.

      That's when I decided this one was a keeper! Cause most men do lie about make-up, just like you said. Even if they think you look okay without it, they always think you look better with it. So they "prefer" that you wear make-up.

      1. Yeah, I hear you, my ex wasn't about that makeup life… whenever I put it on he would say "we goin somewhere?" lol. Mostly because it changed how we interacted- he was a white tee guy, and make up just got in the way because I wanna hug, lay my head places, kiss you and all that, and it just wasn't convenient!
        My recent post Pondering Intensity

    4. I agree with starita34. My man always tells me there's a difference between a "cute girl" and a "girl with cute days." Everyone has their peaks and valleys but you need consistent ingredients in order to qualify for the former. For example, every woman looks better with their hair done and make-up on. Yes, even Halle Berry. But give Halle no make-up and a Lil Kim lace-front, her features still let you know she's cute.

  3. Good post Doc. I pretty much agree with you. I feel you on the supermodel thing. I m pretty much allergic to super skinny women. As for the woman with a sex tape, I might be hesitant to wife her but I would not mind both of us doing some academy award Winning HD 3D stuff. Avatar got nothing on us baby.

  4. "Let's take a break and take the time to get to know each other better, make new friends, etc." bullshit, nigga, you searching for a new girlfriend!

  5. Really? I thought implants were hard. Not that I've touched any but I've seen a couple sets and was not impressed. Guess that's because I'm not a dude. They even looked hard though. But I guess that's better looking than deflated whoopi cushion breasts. *scratches head* And the sex tape thing? Um. I don't think a lot of dudes would wife down a chick that released one to the public. If you have one hidden in your panty drawer or something then he MIGHT be cool but I doubt if errbody seen it, he'd be alright with that. Didn't WIM have a post on his site about Karrine Steffens? Or did that have to do with more of her reputation than the vids? And wouldn't a dude be like "how come you do that with him and not me?" if it's a something she's been holding out on with him?
    And you're on point with that epiphany. Good night folks.

    1. Implants ARE super hard! I always hear guys say they don’t like them but then I wonder if they ever had any real life experience with them.

      1. You get what you pay for.

        I feel like I've been assaulted when my friend's mom with rock hard implants hugs me. Like her breasts are angry at my person. Just rude.

        But my girlfriend with ends breasts feel like buttery heaven with a nipple. No wonder that when she first got them she was always letting folks feel on em and deading that stereotype. Seriously, imagine being flat chested your whole life and then having like, immaculate breasts…I'm happy for her.

        1. But my girlfriend with ends breasts But the breasts of my very wealthy friend that invested a lot in her implants and surgeon feel like buttery heaven with a nipple.

        2. That good to know! My only experience was from a hug. Felt like our breast were fighting and hers won. Rock hard! I personally love the way they look. That may be my 40th birthday present. Lol!

        3. "You get what you pay for."

          This is true. I used to be anti-fake breast because all I had experience with was the fake boulders. Then I've seen/felt some decent ones and I softened my stance. Just lets you know that you can't get your boob job done at Wal-Mart.

        4. This reminds me of a story about a chick who tried to get azz implants on the cheap. She went to some random tranny who injected cement and fix-a-flat into her rear. Awful.

      2. first off that avi tho #thirst48….

        but yeah like i said, i dont think too much about implants because im not sure if i've ever encountered them personally. I thought this one girl was TOO perky but she drives a Nissan. I dont think she has racks to spend on racks

        1. thats the thing she was older like 30 suttin…i dont think chicks my age are gettin implants? are they?

        2. I can't answer that without knowing how old you are but if you're talking about the young ones I'll share that when I was graduating high school, I knew a girl that got them for her graduation present. Her parents made sure she got them early enough for prom.

        3. Oh. Then yes and some way before. They're getting their noses done earlier and earlier these days too.

        4. LMBO!

          Yeah, girrrrrl….these youngins will have you catchin a case. That Similac done changed the game…plus all those growth enhancers in food. Gotsta be mo' careful!

          "May I see your license please?"

        5. I know 2 women that got reductions in their teens and my gf with the nice ones got them in college. Happens at all ages.

      3. Over the past 2 yrs ive become a boob man and just knowing that them joints are fake would piss me off…not to say that i wouldn't smash but i def wouldn't wife!

        You see Doc left out that part…..as men we DEF would smash….but momma taught us what to bring home..we not dumb..

        1. lol its all fake to me…if ya boobs are fake it leads me to ask what else about you is fake..

          mama taught me to bring home something authentic!

        2. Okay so what if nothing was injected, just altered? Technically, that's not fake but it's not really natural either.

        3. I was just curious. I used to be adamantly against getting work done besides the reduction. I had a friend in seventh grade who could literally use hers as a pillow for a nap. (no hyperbole either) And once I'm done being a milking cow I might just get a lift. Is that considered a swindle?

        4. Lifts are all good! I do understand that having children can change ya boob swagger..so a nice lil lift is all good!

    2. WIM did write such a post (Click Here!) but I was actually explaining why men might marry the "promiscuous girl" instead of why not.

      As far as implants go, I think most are hard but men are visual creatures. Most dudes only care if they look good then they go from there. I actually don't think most men care one way or the other but they may have preferences which are different from deal breakers. As of December 06, 2011 8:28 MST, I've never met a man that did not wife up a girl he liked because her breasts werent real. I can only speak for self.

      My recent post N****s in Paris and Beyond

      1. Oh yeah I remember now. lol

        I guess implants are more about the visual than the feel though. How many men didn't wife a girl he liked because of something else about her breasts though? If he liked her wasn't he already passed that though?

    3. My favorite TV show used to be Dr. 90210. Trust, we've come a long way with implants. In fact, you won't know 50% of the women who have them. Ironically, it's not usually women who want DDs who get implants, it's usually women who want a full C, or at least a B. Some women just hate being flat chested. Now with that said, this doesn't even include augmentations and reductions. Some women sculpt the Children of the Coconut up to be perfect after a few years of them just hanging out and loitering.
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

    4. I don't have a lot of time today. But I feel like a lot of people are talking about a woman's body, but they don't love these b!tches like me, Just Blaze and Rozay do.

      Part of my deep Love of the female anatomy is the uniqueness in natural curvature design. Have you ever seen a man made forest, can't you feel the difference in the lack of randomness that exist?? Its not suppose to be perfect its suppose to be personal and intimate. The point is what she is showing to you is what she developed over the years, even the fact that she is insecure about them only makes me harder. You lose that with a foreign object. You can't recreate nature, I don't MIND good implants just like I don't mind fake wood floors. But at the end of the day I know the reason why I am so attracted to a woman's body. I'm concious of how my art is formed, I can't turn that switch off. Not all men are like that…. but my bed room approach is very unique to say the least. Very unique.

  6. 1. Impants I am always re-evaluating what I like… And I am not sure about this one… I look at photos on tumblr often, and even though I know most women are 50% real, I enjoy the painting/photo in front of me.

    2. Sex Tapes I effin' mind from the point of view of ownership… If a woman has a child with a man first or is the first to have s s*x tape with a chick, in a way he owns her & feel the feelings of leftover spoils, (and Adonis has ways to nullify those feelings & situations, but that is not the point)… For me part of the relationship game is control & getting there first, and I have been beaten to alot of desirable women in my life. 🙂 S*x tapes are a good way to weed women out 7 years after the fact. When you are looking for something serious

    3. My credit is lower 600, but that is irrelevant. Thank you ladies

    4. I had this conversation with my self & my brother… I doubt I will have a serious LTR with society's "dream girl".

    In my formative years, I grew up around regular chicks (most men did), and in 2011, the regular chicks today are sexier sans the FAT than in the 90's (chalk it up to genetics, etc.) That is irrelevant too. An above average regular girl is just fine for me. My d*ck has a different agenda Don't listen to him

    5. I cheated when I was like a early teenager, and mismanaged that sh*t worse than a relationship rookie… You can cheat & make your relationship better… But now, now that I understand relationship frames & integrity I don't need to secretly lust for & sleep with foreign broads…

    Men need to be completely honest about their internal sh*t & constantly re-evaluate themselves as they evolve & acquire more information… I'm Game


    1. You will always be beaten to a lot of desirable women Adonis…unless you manage to find a virgin….and if you do you may wanna check that she is over 12 or 13 and that you not on some R. Kelly ish….lol.
      And if you knew a grown azz woman that was a virgin you may get tired of how inexperienced she is.

      Which brings me to lie #6……."I don't want a virgin" roflmao…..Never in my 36 yrs have I know any man to turn down pu$$y for any damn reason, Unless the chick is absolutely repulsive to them, they know she is a potential stalker, or they question if she is actually a "real natural born" woman or not.
      I have heard men say they have still had sex with women who had not so Summers Eve fresh odors…….so if you will hit that, then you will damn well break off Virgin Mary if you could.
      Lyin azz "ninja's" be killin me……

      1. Lol @Breebree u r on point. For the most part a dude will sleep with a virgin if she’s willi to learn nd not prudish. Same with ” I only mess with chicks that have no hair down there” yea ok some men be putting their face in hairy box on the regular.

      2. Breebree: "I have heard men say they have still had sex with women who had not so Summers Eve fresh odors…"

        That would completely kill it for me. I'm sorry, if the panties come down and it smells like tear gas, I'm out.

        1. lmao….I heard that Hugh…..for some fella's thats not enough to keep them away…I've even had 1 or 2 men tell me they just held their breath……lol
          I think the funniest thing I've ever heard was my guy friend in college who really liked this girl in our major. I introduced them and thought they would be good together. He smashed and said he could never date her. I asked why and he said with the most serious face. "that girl had the nappiest pubes I've ever seen. she need a serious super bantu perm down there. forreal" And he was serious…..lmao…I'm like, "fool women can't perm their pubes…are you out ya rabid azz" mind….lmao…I'm laughin right now just thinkin about that whole convo……

        2. Why can't you perm it though? Not even Just For Me? If you can put Nair down there, why not a perm? Mine aren't nappy I'm just asking.

        3. krystll because perms have chemicals too strong for the pubic area….chile more American women would be circumcised just like Africans but there's would be burnt off from trying to perm their pubes……lmao.

        4. So see I know that about the chemicals and what not but why then is it okay to put scalding hot wax down there and I've seen pube hair dye too. That's got chemicals in it. I swear I'm not a total doofus. I'm just asking for the sake of convo. lol

        5. ok krystll I'm goin to pass on some info because I've been an Esthetician for almost 7 years now and been licensed for 3 years. And been to Cosmetology School but no license in that.
          Anywhoo….there are no real harsh chemicals (if any) in bikini wax…….it's mostly composed of a mixture of beeswax and liquid rosin.
          The worst bikini wax can do is burn if it's too hot. Dye for pubic hair does not have the same chemicals in it as hair dye. Not sure what chemicals it has in it but I know the chemicals aren't as harsh. I also believe pubic hair dye contains chamomile and aloe to soothe.
          The skin around your genitals men and women is much thinner than any other part of your body with the exception of your eyelids. It is also more sensitive than any other skin on your body.
          If bikini wax is too hot it can literally take off the top layer of your skin on your bikini line….seen it happen and not a pretty site.
          Now remember most perms/relaxers have lye…even ones that say no lye have small amounts of lye. Also relaxers have some alcohol in them….you definitely do Not want this anywhere near your genital area. I've personally Never used Nair in my bikini area…only on my legs.
          So no matter how nappy a womans pubic hair is I as a professional Strongly Advise you to Never Ever Ever put any type of perm or relaxer there unless your willing to risk doing some serious damage.
          And no your not a doofus….glad you asked. Hope it's clear now. Any other questions on that subject ask away….

        6. lol dang girl you are thorough! I was just thinking this may be an underserved market. You and I should go into business together and create a gentle pube perm. You be the brains and I'll be the other person. lol

      3. I dont do virgins because either their young, or they saving themselves for the right one and i really dont want to be "that guy"

        1. I've got to ask because I'm genuinely curious. What is the cut off age for guys to want virgins? Back in my day (lol), seemed like everybody wanted a virgin. Now nobody. What happened?

        2. Super head happened, Celebrity sex tapes and pole dancing lessons, aint no excuse for women not to be "Freaks now"

          plus men always wanted freaks they just did'nt want everyone to see their women as a freak. (Good girl to the world, Freaky girl to your man)

        3. i say 21. After one has gotten a few women under his belt (no pun intended) i just dont see them taking steps backward in order to be with a virgin

        4. To all this anti-virgin propaganda I just gotta state:
          Virgin =/= non freaky, boring, unadventurous, lacking of sexuality, prudish etc.

          The ones I've met are resourceful as I'll get out and usually h0rny as he||, present company included. #ThereWillBeNuts

        5. agree virgin does not= boring not freaky.

          But remember talking that talk and walking that walk are two different things. Everybodies a freak until those clothes come off and you realize that sex takes practice and that all those freaky things you thought you could do off back will take practice. Plus theres very few virgins that like super freaky and willing to go the distance right away and those who just think about it to get hot and horny.

        6. my suite-mate was a virgin in college and far from boring, non freaky, prudish and unadventurous…she was a Scorpio…(nuff said) lol
          We always had very candid convo's about sex with her and I like to think we taught her very well……*smile*

  7. "I don't get with girls who smoke".

    I've smoked pretty much my entire adult life and every man I've ever been involved with would never get with a smoker. So either I'm irresistible or that "never" is negotiable.
    My recent post Never Say This To a Man

    1. Cosign on that Max…..I’m not a smoker but very few men will not get with a woman that is fine and they really like because she smokes…Now a few will if they are looking to “settle down” and seriously couldn’t be married to a smoker…..but again very few.
      Another thing is just because a man won’t “get with” a woman Does Not mean he won’t “smash.”
      Took me a minute to differentiate but I finally “got it.”

        1. Exactly! I think a lot of people might be confused today. A dude will always smash if you’re at least cute with a decent shape. Doesn’t mean you’re meeting the folks, or even metting his friends for that matter. Rosa, Kim K, Suelyn, fake breasts, smokers, ass shots, all smashable. Marriage material? Eh, probably not, maybe, depending on the dude’s standards in life.

        2. Co-signs life insurance policy to NIA and Wis.
          Huge. Huge Difference.

          Just because I put up with it doesn't mean I am not disgusted by it. But I am a man and I can suck it up for the good of my Jolly Ranch Her.

        3. I think face is a luxury, b/c the price of brown paper bags has come down significantly in this economy.

          But unsmelly vag. All I need.

    2. Damn Max you got me feeling guilty over here..lol i swore up and down I'd never get wit a chick that smoked..she was temporary from the start but sooooo damn sexy…I can admit, I smashed the ashtray and loved it…lol I think it was because she never smoked in front of me and she never smelled like cigs..or maybe she looked so damn good i ignored all of the above…..i still say id never wife a chix that smokes tho…

    3. Negroids take chicks to smoke hookah and then be like, "I don't like a chick that smokes."

      Negroids smoke a Black and then let the chick hit the joint a few times and then be like, "I don't like a chick that smokes."

      Negroids roll an L with a chick and then be like, 'I don't like a chick that smokes cigarettes."

      Inconsistent negroids.
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

      1. To be fair all of those examples aren't very comprable when speaking of a person that is a chain smoker that may go through multiple packs in a day and possibly surrounds you with constant second hand smoke.

        At least I'm assuming the context of "smoking" here is chain smoking/ smoking consistently every day. In that respect there's nothing inconsistent there at all as they are a completely different variation.

        1. Yeah see if we had clarified chain smoker then it wouldn't make sense. But I didn't assume to classify the term "a smoker." But yeah I mean, that's probably what they mean to say, "I don't like a chain smoker." And even that is up for debate, there's some people who go through a pack a day and others who go through three.
          My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

      2. "Negroids roll an L with a chick and then be like, 'I don't like a chick that smokes cigarettes."

        All day long.


        But I get it though…. cuz I say it too…. won't date a man who smokes cigarettes but prefer one who smokes. *shrug*
        My recent post Pondering Intensity

  8. 5)They don’t cheat-

    lol I think some men lie just for the hell of it. But yea number 5 from some guys you have to take with a grain of salt. Most men mentally leave a relationship thats not working at the moment before they even tell their current girlfriend. So in their head if they didnt cheat when things were all good then it dont count. (Remember men dont break up they drift off and act up until the current chick gets the hint)

    4) Listen we all want the sexy super models we see on tv, but in real life you take what you find attractive and get over it. Nothing worse than I guy who is ok looking talking about he need a Rosa Acosta or he’ll pass (suuure) then next time you see him the chick he with looks no where close.

  9. Funny post but I disagree with the Rosa Acosta thing and #5.

    Id never wife that. She is a slide at best. Nothing id ever bring home to the family. Just have my fun with it and dip when its over. Look good (or even great) == Wife Material

    As for #5 I can honestly say I have NEVER cheated. Believe it if you want or not. Some dudes will tell you Im lying because so long as they can believe that all guys do it it makes it easier to validate their own actions. But at any point that I’ve been in any level if a relationship I have been faithful.

    Now im not saying I am at all perfect. I have a number of faults but cheating has never been one of them.

    1. larne I do believe that there are a few men who have never cheated, however it's very very very few.
      Another lie I think men tell is to their boys and sometimes fam that they don't love and aren't in love with a woman they really are in love with.
      They try to make it seem like the relationship is more casual than it really is and play that "cool role" and act like they don't love her when they know good and hell well they do….

    2. I don't think you would treat Rosa like a slide. That's what you are saying right now, but you not mixed in the ooh-wee. I seen a lot of dudes say they would never wife down a basic broad on campus who had a rough freshman year. But as Richard Pryor said, "It got good to them…" and that's when you realize that you basically go ta campus jumpoff as your #1. Just get over it. If she doing what you want her to do for you and she make you feel a little bit better than the next chick, just admit it, that's wifey.

      But still, you can't say what you would do with a chick like Rosa until you do it.
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

  10. I’ll speak for myself and say I’m honest about my number, but I don’t think I have a number worth lying about. Honestly, I don’t think anyone really does. A number is just that: a number. Not always a character statement.

    Likewise, as there are women who are honest about their number, I think there are men who actually don’t cheat. I kinda think that men who insist EVERY man cheats are cheaters trying to lessen their mistakes. Sure, we all make mistakes, but we don’t all make the SAME mistakes, so not everyone cheats.

    Basically, these are just generalizations, and not even as common as people like to think.

    1. "I'll speak for myself and say I'm honest about my number, but I don't think I have a number worth lying about."

      Same. I'm torn on the second part. The number of people you sleep with does actually speak to your character, whether you're liberal, you've made some mistakes, you have some baggage, you just love sex, or whatever it is. But I do think that people should simply be honest with each other, because at the end of the day, you shouldn't be with someone from whom you have to hide your past or some aspect of your character.

  11. Heaux stay winning these days, former strippers, sex tape distributors, chicks who've spread their joy for all the world to see in King, Mens Magazine, Smooth, etc stay with a baller and then become a brand and get rich to boot.

    Kim K. enough said
    Amber Rose-chick is a judge on a tv show and has a campaign with Smirnoff vodka
    Karrine Stephans-on book #4 teaching other chicks how to be a heaux and win.

    If she has a pretty face, small waist and her booty round, then she could have let the LA Lakers run a train and and ninjas would still be clobbering to get to that arse.

    1. Some women understand man's nature better than others and aint afraid to exploit it for all it is worth. Don't hate the playette, hate the game (and men).

      1. "Heaux stay winning these days, former strippers, sex tape distributors, chicks who've spread their joy for all the world to see in King, Mens Magazine, Smooth, etc stay with a baller and then become a brand and get rich to boot."

        Don't worry Brit, when it REALLY matters, they won't win if they continue down that path. Have faith that righteousness will ALWAYS win.

    2. Brit speakin of LA Lakers have yall seen Shaq's minibyte of a girlfriend? That girl is miniature compared to him…me and my grandmom were talking about it last nite and had the funniest convo….Even grandmom was like how the hell does she have sex wit his big azz…….he would smother her if he got on top of her……..lmao….hilarious…..gotta love my hip grandmom….*smile*
      Sorry I know that was off topic but hey………………………….

    3. It ain't even about "heaux stay winning". It's about the fact that those women don't let how people view them affect their decision to make that money. A woman who is confident in herself will always go far. Think about all the women who aren't thinking about what article or book they can read to find a man… they usually in relationships and married. It's the ones who lack confidence who are losing.

      Low self-esteem Bassica stay losing…
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

      1. We can agree to disagree. How they make their money is up to them. I would not release a sex tape in hopes to gain fame and riches, its not in my moral code and I do care how my parents and grandparents view me but more power to the chicks who don't. What I'm saying is I realize that doesn't make them any less desirable as a mate.

        In my circle of friends, those who are single are not reading books and articles on how to find a man and they also don't lack self-esteem. It seems as if you're saying if you are willing to pose naked or scantily clad then you have high self-esteem when the exact opposite could be true.

        1. I didn't say any of that, and I wasn't attacking you personally. All I was saying is that they are not focused on what others think and that's yielded some good results to them. You may have a different system of morals and those results wouldn't be good to you. Your moral code is your moral code, doesn't make you a better or worse person for having it.

          And I hate the comment about "my circle of friends"…. people have a circle of friend with 4 people in it and think that's any type of representative sample. Again, not an attack against you but vice versa, I am a member of a college fraternity and that's like me saying, "I don't know any Black men who aren't college educated."
          My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

  12. ” I love u” ” i care about you” take that phrase with a grain of salt when A man says that, 9 times out of ten he does” t feel that way about u he feels that way about what’s in between your legs.

    1. Actually I take "I care about you" with a grain of salt for real, but not "I love you." They ain't crazy, they know the difference. I think I've rarely, very rarely, been told "I love you" from a man I might doubt meant it. But "I care about you" ?! Ninjahs say that shyt all the time.
      My recent post Pondering Intensity

      1. Cuz we care….doesnt mean we want to spend the rest of our lives with you, it means we'll be hurt if you got hit by a bus or suttin

        1. @Tristan lol listen yall got to stop assuming every women wants to spend the rest of her life with everyman she likes. when i refer to “I care about you” like I have deep feelings for you I would never try to hurt you,or ” Baby I care about you that girl dont mean nothing”

        2. when one is unfaithful i think its more greed than anything, he might care for you he might love you but he's trying to get more bang for his buck #nopunintended


      Stop asking dudes how they feel about you when y'all about to have s*x, having s*x, or had s*x. Beforehand, i'm focused on the bigger picture, during, i'm just not trying to stop, and after, i'm emotional. I'll pay your rent if you lay it down something proper on a dude if you ask after sex.

      Ask a dude when he's sober and chilling at home watching an adult film how he feel about you and I bet you he'll tell you the truth.
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

      1. Personally, I would never ask a dude how he felt about me. I don't want to solicit that type of thing. If he cares about me, I should feel it and if he loves me he should tell me. I would never ask, "do you love me?" at any point. That's lame and makes people mad uncomfortable.

      2. I never said anything abot the women asking him "do u love me/care about me, Im talking about him saying it. Men say these kinds of things without women asking them when they think they will lose acess to the box, or if they know she has feelings for him and he's in the dog house.

    1. What kinda man in 2011 is still talking about he doesn’t eat the box????? That ninja would be playing himself. That like a woman saying she doesn’t Rock the Mic. What!?!?!?! Slide to the right shawtie. You are no longer an option.

        1. ROTFLMFAO at you sayin "don't get mad" first. Really SD?! Really? you just sayin that cuz I'm a black gurl. See now I'm pizzed.

          Just kiddin, lol.

          Ummmmm I don't know if it is or not, lol. Maybe? Maybe it's just me, but it's actually more intimate to me… so it's reserved… I intended for my husband to be the first and last, actually, lol. But if we're in a relationship, then it's a given. (but so is receiving it, so… lol)
          My recent post Pondering Intensity

        2. "but it's actually more intimate to me… so it's reserved"

          Right but that's the things..its like y'all saving it for marriage?!? I never understood that..

    2. A lil known history-

      Back in the 70's a lot of black men did not do that and felt like it was something other men did because they were lacking where they were packing….

        1. Im sayin eatin the arse is a delicate situation….I guess it depends on the dude..we not all fans..

          My take is if you eat cooch u prob eat everything else..lol..its all on the plate, so get to it!

        1. Hmmm nah, the perineum (space between the two) aint but so big, and is highly erogenous, lol… so my guess is it'd take you a minute to even know that's what's happening- especially if he's literally face deep… So you might end up bringing him back to where you want him… but I doubt you'd levitate away from the tongue.

          But that's just my guess, lol.
          My recent post Pondering Intensity

    3. My ex use to say that mess. I would look at him like what kind of man are you?? Then he do it like a pro. hehe good times….

    4. First of all, I stopped calling it "coochie" when Uncle Luke decided to run for Mayor.

      Second of all, most sexual acts are basically trying to keep the course. Back in the day, a dude could give a shorty some yards and cab money and she would be fine. Now the game is all inflated, you got to do a little more than just giving yards. Don't matter to me though, because women have come a long way too. Some of the stuff we asking them to do now, never would have flown twenty years ago… correction 40 years ago. I know some freaky 50 year olds.
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

  13. 1. I never think too much into real and fake because i just dont think people within my social circles have fake breast/ass money so i assume everything's real.

    2. Like Adonis said its not so much the tape as much as its a ninja got you to do it.

    3. My credit score is -___- but i blame it on the student loans (not the credit card, 3 ex gf cell phones etc)

    4. I rather be a cute couple than be the "how the hell did YOU get HER" guy.

    5. No comment.


    6. We care about your tattoos: Most ninjas dont care about tattoos especially if its somewhere like your arm or suttin

    7. It Aint Even Like That: If you even have to ASK where he and her stand most likely they are together. I was just clowning my boy about that he stay tryna deny his girl like im a female he like n whatnot

    8. Au Naturale: Guys front like they dont date girls with weave, or wear makeup are bull hittin.

    1. Tristian why do men do that????? Deny deny deny their girls around their boys…
      Like Jay-Z on Pharell's Frontin track……
      "Everytime your name was brought up
      I would act all nonchalant in front of an audience
      Likeyou was just another shorty I put the naughty on
      But uh, truth be told you do me for a loop, this Hov
      I'm too old to be frontin when I'm feeling Denzel
      And acting like you ain't appealing when you are
      Stuting like you ain't my only girl when you are (I was just frontin)
      I'm ready to stop when you are"

      Whats that about……?????

      1. Its Tristan (sorry its a pet peeve of mines)

        but yea i think its a vulnerability thing (as if being in a mongamous relationship is a sign of weakness)

    2. 8. thank you, guys always yelling about girls with weave, but the mintue they see a girl walk in the room with some 12'inch Remy, lip gloss , cute face and a fat butt they are all over her. To me it's not that men dont like weaves (THEY DONT LIKE BAD WEAVES/ BAD LACE FRONTS)

  14. "In the middle of authoring this post, I had an epiphany. Thought i’d share it with you today. I always thought that sex for a man was completely unfair because you have to focus on NOT doing something. That’s just horribly frustrating. Well, I imagine that for women trying to have TNA without ever getting to the point of fat, has got to be the female equivalent."


    I think another thing is a man who said he's never been hurt before. Thats just false. If you've been through real shyt, you've been hurt. real talk!
    My recent post 5 Machines to steer clear from at the gym! vol. 1

  15. Post had me cracking up. I appreciate the shout-out and I stand by what I said. Let me address all 5 because they are worthy of addressing.

    1. They don’t like implants. Men who say they don’t like implants are more than likely men who don’t like breasts. That’s not a bad thing. Some men are “ass” men. Nothing wrong with that. Plus, most men don’t know sh*t about women so how they seem to think they can always tell implants from real is beyond me. Most men think these big booty model women in ‘Black Men’ are natural so miss me with that. Final question: Would you prefer some ugly natural breasts are some fake nice breasts? Not all fake breasts look good…neither do all real ones. Chill.

    2. They mind if you got a sex tape. Let me get this straight, most men would willingly make a sex tape but wouldn’t date a woman who would make a sex tape? GTFO.

    3. Their credit is above 800. What J said.

    4. They want a supermodel. Most men actually do want a supermodel. Actually most men want the perfect woman. They can handle neither. And that’s all I have to say about that.

    5. They don’t cheat. Not all men cheat but there are two types of men who don’t cheat. A) The men who have a strong moral code and equally strong resolve. I respect them. B) Wack men. Wack men don’t cheat because no one ever tempts them to cheat aka no one ever tries to cheat with them. Because they’re wack, even when they go out of their way to cheat, they are still rebuffed. Wack dudes are like “I never cheat” but I’m staring at them like: Bro, you have 18 kids, no job, no muscle definition, no hair, and no prospects. But out of respect I just keep my mouth shut because you know what they say about De-Nile and Egypt. Anyway…

    I’d like to end by saying most men are conditioned to give women-friendly responses. Even their conditioning is conditioned. It’s not that men lie, it’s that they don’t tell the whole truth. They often prefer to tell women want they want to hear, not what they need to hear, even when talking to their boys, because they’re scared it might somehow get back to a woman. True story.

    1. "I'd like to end by saying most men are conditioned to give women-friendly responses. Even their conditioning is conditioned. It's not that men lie, it's that they don't tell the whole truth. They often prefer to tell women want they want to hear, not what they need to hear, even when talking to their boys, because they’re scared it might somehow get back to a woman. True story."


      I think we confusing supermodels and video vixens here today. I nay never said I wouldn't date a video vixen. I mean, Chanel Iman, Adriana Lima and Alessandra Ambrosio are my type, but… damn yo.. that was one of those Lil Wayne moments. I was putting that in there for the dudes on the struggle out there. Not that I actually lived that lol.
      My recent post My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)

      1. Nah, I agree with your overall point. I think the difference is between grown men, men and boys. Boys, I don't feel like discussing today. But even men fall victim to not being able to decipher between what they want – the video vixen or supermodel – and what they need. A grown man realizes that if a man is with a woman he does not like or whose company he does not truly enjoy (outside of the bedroom, if that) simply because she is pretty is not winning. Mind you, I've been with woman I don't like because she was pretty lol. I understand this struggle. In fact, I will no doubt do this again. I'm aware of it though and I would not take the next step I hope of putting a ring on a pretty girl I don't even Love.

        My recent post N****s in Paris and Beyond

      1. Possibly. I think that falls in-line A. Most succesful, handsome, grown men will be desired by women. This is only natural. As such, they will not be able to avoid situations where cheating is an option their entire life. Some woman, at some point, will test that man. Plus, as Common said in his song aptly title Faithful, "Even if they don't try, some ladies test men."

        That's why that man needs to have strong resolve.
        My recent post A One Woman Man

    2. "Let me get this straight, most men would willingly make a sex tape but wouldn't date a woman who would make a sex tape? GTFO."

      Wait a minture. You are telling me you would wife down a chick who made a sex tape of herself getting trizzed by the Hampton Football Team and posted it to the internet with her twitter handle?!? So you are telling me you would wife a WSHH Honey? After she pours that nasty cherry chocolate sauce they all pour on themselves? That is what you and Doc J look for in a wifey.
      I am not saying I am not going to wife a chick who sent her ex man a nudey film. But I am not trying to wife something that everybody can google.
      And Rich chicks don't count, b/c than I would be wifey for the money. So I would wife Kim K, no pre-nub. But I would never wife Montana Fishburn. NEVER!

      1. I think for the sake of this discussion they are not talking about Porn aka WSHH Honeys. Porn = public content and Sex Tape = private entertainment between 2 consenting adults.

        Not that I know anything about these things….

    1. Kids arent a dealbreaker per se, but i'd prefer not to, i wanna spend weekends out of town, i wanna slide thru on a late night and i want all the attention…its hard to get that from mothers

      1. All the woman needs is a good co-parenting plan. I have two kids every other week. That's right…a whole 7 consecutive days of "ME" time. During "kid week", we do lunch dates and occasional drop-in visits. But, the 7 "ME" days gives me time to vacation and all that.

        Full attention can be given…just takes good planning.

      2. Trist, you missing out. you can do all of that stuff..and the cool thing is they don't have time for games so the time they spend with you is 100% good quality time

        1. I have a child, shes 9..best thing I ever did..BUT i was young and felt like I was ready…I take pride in being a father and I know its real work..its a lifetime commitment that I enjoy every day…so meeting a women that has A child understands the work it entails…its like we part of the same gang..lol Its a sign of responsibility as well…I take that into consideration when selecting a wifee…as a parent you spend a lot of time sacrificing for a greater good..that quality alone requires strength…and that's admirable..I think it was Most that said how great it is to admire ya lady…a single mom (in my eyes) has already had a head start on winning me over..

        2. awww, this is sweet, I love this response and its one of the reasons why I actually prefer dating a man with a child because they understand and respect that I can't give them all of my attention.

        3. And in reality that's the way it is. When you live with someone and yall have kids together the attention given to each other as partners can be very limited at times

        4. I absolutely love your response! I have a daughter myself who is 5 years old and I think I had convinced myself that I would never meet a man because of how much attention a relationship needs coupled with the fact that I have my daughter 100% of the time. I figure/figured why would any man want to bother with me because of my situation (and what I hear men say about single moms). Your response at least makes me consider that there are men who will not have a problem with that and will actually admire me for my efforts…now if only men like you lived within 100 miles of me lol…..

        5. Having a kid is a great filter too. If a dude wont deal with you because you have a child then eff him! You don't need him. Hes gotta love you and ya child(ren). I meet women that wont date me too seriously because I have a daughter, and im an active dad and some women want your full attention, they wanna be #1. That's all good, at least I know up front how you feel..and i typically give them their walking papers quick-fast..lol

        6. Soooo Mr. SD I've got to ask now. Do you TARGET a woman with a kid or do you find an attractive woman and just consider it a bonus if she has a kid? I was just grocery shopping with my two kids in tow and a dude approached. It made me think about what you were saying here today and now I really gotta know because I used to feel kind of bad for a dude who would approach me while I have a kid with me but now I'm like dang am I a target?

        7. Kryst you're a target because your beautiful! Beautiful is beautiful, it don't really matter how many kids you have..men will flock

          Personally i don't target women with children. Its a huge bonus tho.

        1. Not really…for some reason women with multiple kids scare me away…I think its because I feel like they made the same mistake twice or three times..like you placed a band-aid onto of another band-aid…..like you had relationships issues with this dude (who your not married to) during your first pregnancy..why do you now have 3 kids by him?

          Its not always the circumstance but its typical

        2. Lol SD. It certainly depends on the circumstances, if she is a divorced mother of multiple children then that could be a whole other ball game with dynamics that you could tolerate.

    2. Just because some men wont date women with kids does'nt mean others wont. I mean if I had a kid and met a guy who said that I would be happy take it as a early red flag and find a guy who loves kids and understands my situation.

      The real joke is when a man with 1 kid says" I wont date a woman with one kid" like bruh we in the same boat 0_0

      1. This is funny because it's true — but for the most part just like with a child, men will find a way to make it work or work around it with the furbabies too if he's feelin you. #LivingProof

        *Aint that right Babies…. … Canoodling with my 2 toybreeds*

  16. Gotta disagree with some of the joints listed here:

    1) I actually (really) don't like implants, ass shots, collagen injections or anything of the sort. To me, it means a woman is insecure with her own body (and likely insecure period).

    2) Number two depends on who you have a sex tape with. If it's an ex, then it's cool. If it was some random escapade that you foolishly decide to tape, then it hints at you being loose. Which isn't cool.

    3) Cheating……I never have, nor would I. And I mean in the truest sense of the word. Cheating to me is totally unnecessary and I find it far easier to just be single and not have to explain anything to anybody.

    Though I do enough to where I won't even bring this up unless asked….and I don't expect any woman to actually believe it because "all men cheat" regardless of what they say, right?

  17. I take every last thing that comes out of a man's mouth with a grain of salt. <– true story #unsuccessfullytryingnottobeangry

    1. Hmm. Out of curiosity, how would you feel if a guy told you that he's going to take everything you say with a grain of salt until you prove it's true? The way I see it, the only thing on this list that can be proven is his credit score.

      Everything else falls under either you believe it or you don't.

      1. Men do it all the time. We all to a certain extent go " When I see it I believe".

        Just b/c I said i'll take it with a grain of salt doesnt mean im calling you a liar it just means im not hanging on to your every word. For example you say " I going to treat you good blah,blah" cool but your actions will show me if your about all that talk until then I just keep what you said in the back of my mind and dont take it to heart

      2. It would'nt affect me at all. I am true blue. What you see is what you get over here. And I am game for being called out should smtg I say not match actions.
        Although I don't generally go telling guys that "everything is going to be taken with a grain of salt" but I have been told I am sort of blunt about thing.
        And a lot of things are said before you can actually see ppl in action. So when I say "grain of salt" thing I mean I take note of what you said and then I watch to see if your actions line up. So I believe it can be proven eventually.

    2. I grew up with five brothers so I have heard it all. I don't think men always mean harm they just have a goal in mind and they doing what is necessary to reach that goal. I can read bs from a mile away. Im the type of women you are going to do better with laying all your cards on the table and letting me decide if I am willing to deal. The problem is most men are use to having to lie for so long its hard to believe that I mean what I say. It takes them out of their element.
      But I baby step it for them. They will try to tell a few mild truths and see how I react and I remain calm and discuss the matter at hand. We keep at it until we build a certain level of honesty. Chronic liars generally don't last long tho cause they always in the back of their head like "if i tell her about this she gone be out". And that may be true but what's even truer is if I found out you lied that's automatic disqualification. I done got to old to be playing silly games.

      1. I think its a mixture of men telling "the mild truth" and women not asking the right questions for example women ask: have you ever cheated /man:no or na you no we were taking a break vs a women asking: what do you consider cheating for yourself , I think asking the question that way gets you more infor and allows you to dig a little deeper

        Most women get mad when men tell the truth 80% of the time b/c you told us 4 lies before you just came out with the truth

  18. I think its more of a level headed approach. As women we get a little to excited over our new boo and dont take things in prespective. We let all those sweet things he says get to us on to many levels and end up screwed in the end. It's not about being mean or calling him guilty until proven innocent, its understanding that he wants something out of the situtation and it might not be what you want. So until he's action match what he's saying fully and consistently .. "take it with a grain of salt"

    1. While, I get what you're saying. It's one thing to think that in your head and another to demonstrate that to the guy and act on it. When is what many women who share your sentiment would do, demonstrate that to the guy.

      As a man, the worth of my word means a lot. It'll hurt if someone I liked or was interested in acted as if my word didn't mean anything unprovoked. That'll deter me from continuing any type of association with that person. True story.
      My recent post How to implement an OODBMS (pt. 1)

      1. I agree, I think a lot of women confuse take it with a grain of salt with being mean or nasty or consistenly putting up a unnessary fight.Again this is not about me calling you a liar it's just letting you know that your words only hold weight with me on a deeper level if you back them up with solid action.

        But like you said the weight of your words means a lot, that’s probably true for you b/c you stick to your word. A lot of men don’t .

      1. And remember to clear her name(s) from your text and call logs before you get home. An ounce of prevention and all that good stuff.

  19. Thank you for thus post. Tell the truth! But I’m not congratulating you. seem like you need too much praise. Are you an only child? I can’t stand people who need all kinds of attention. There are a few billion other people, I mean STFU. Anyways, men will wife the girl who makes them feel complete. She can be a certified heaux or a virgin fresh out the box. It’s about chemistry and compatibility. Period.

    I have a theory. Dudes who talk loudly and frequently about what they won’t wife are, how you say, largely free of naked fun partners. They have a lot of time to ponder and declare their “highly selective” policies. They might feel the need to explain why they get none. As you find a variety of more people you encounter who want to be with you, your deal breakers tend to dwindle. Because you did it and discovered its not that big of a deal. If you got a long list of deal breakers, maybe its cause nobody wants your azz. IMHO

    1. I mean STFU

      I can say this is one of the best idioms to insert into an explanation. lol

      As you find a variety of more people you encounter who want to be with you, your deal breakers tend to dwindle.

      I've seen this go in the other direction. I think it's well known that those who can be picky will be picky. I'm not trying to disprove your theory though.
      My recent post How to implement an OODBMS (pt. 1)

  20. I definitely loved this thought-provoking and hilarious post but I'll be honest- I fell off the wagon somewhere around #2. What manner of f*ckery is that? Watching your girl get smashed by another dude? I'm so confused. I couldn't be aroused watching a tape of another person pleasuring my significant other. And I don't think it has to do with jealousy. I completely accept the fact that you've been with other people- but I definitely don't wanna watch it, let alone use it for "personal time" in the future.

      1. LOL!!! My comment was less related to the concept in question and more directed to the example used. I would like to think I'm mature enough to let the past be the past, because after all, it is what it is and has really nothing to do with the present nor future. However, I'm human. The fact he made it wouldn't bother me, the fact he kept it- that's a different story. Lol.

      2. Hell naw… well, other than the fact that I know you'd probably eventually want one of us… and the fact that you still have one of someone else means that if something goes wrong with us you wouldn't destroy the tape- all of which means I'll date you but I'm not making a movie with you.
        My recent post Pondering Intensity

  21. Ive never cheated while in a relationship, but readin the last one kinda makes me wish I had. I guess, just so I could fall in that 'everyone else' category (Hot-mess sarcasm). That goes both ways though because I dont know any female (at least any that I considered dating) that would tell if they cheated either.

  22. You know what else:

    1. Being called "thirsty." Seriously, there's groups of us laughing at how riled up women get from the simple mention of that word. You would think they've been called b*tches. lol

    2. When a guy says only women with X physical feature are beautiful. Ya'll act like these few guys speak for the rest (and that he's 100% serious). So if two guys on different days speak opposing opinions it's like: "Oh so we (women) can't W?" then "Wait. We(women) couldn't W and now we can't Z? I wish ya'll would make up your minds!" We laugh… I may or may not be speaking for all other men. LOL

    3. Doing act Y makes a woman a ho3.
    My recent post How to implement an OODBMS (pt. 1)

  23. Late to commenting but I gotta say, this dude Mr. SD needs to take a victory lap. Son had all y'all women-folk noses open. He said "I'm a good father, I love women with kids, I'm well endowed and i eat everything on the plate" all in the comments section of this one post.


  24. I agree. Men don't really know what they want. That's why I don't take love advice from my guy friends anymore. Scratch that…. there are very few men I will take relationship advice from. My male friends have sent me off a few times, but my female friends usually keep it real with me.

  25. I have to address #4, you said it correctly the next time you go to a NIGHTCLUB or a STRIPBAR is where you will see the men gravatate towards the ice cream eating chicas but if you want to go to the Island's or a convention you will get the men who want fruit eating chicas. There is nothing wrong with being a heavy women if that in your nature but if you want a quality man…..stability, honest, supportive…he wants something fit and healthy…not big butt Bertha, only look good to the local drug dealers and wanna be rappers…..if you believe me…try it yourself….I have been a size 14 and got every "yo ma" when I am rally looking for a "hello, my name is Dr. Moore and yours, if you dont mind me asking….

  26. How many men and do you cheat seem to be the hush-hush questions. However do you cheat is asking if you is asking if it is one of your personality trait. How many men have you been with is asking how many experiences you have had. They really don't size-Up. And it is a week analogy. Bringing up her past to suite something one may do in the heat of the moment defeats the purpose. And it is a lame card to keep play'in.

  27. kisscougar.C­ óM——it's the most effective site in the world­ to connect with, date and marry successful, beautiful­ people.-Meanwhile, . It's worthy a try. You do not­ have to be rich or famous. !


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