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Love & Hip Hop: Why You Should Never Mix Business with Pleasure

When Love and Hip Hop Go Wrong...

Never mix business with pleasure. It’s a mantra that we have heard time and time again. It’s also a mantra that has been broken throughout the course of time. The separation between your personal and professional life can be a fine line, and when this line is overstepped, more often than not chaos erupts. No better example do we see of this cautionary tale, then on the latest VH1 guilty pleasure “Love and Hip Hop”. While I don’t watch this show often, I have enough friends and loved ones who watch it around me to be fully abreast of the plot lines and situations unfolding. Truth is, watching that show faithfully would be too easy, as I am a sucker for ratchetness and drama filled TV! We all have our vices right?

Watching the latest episode this week, it was clear that the lines between friends and business partners, family and friends, confidants and snitches, are crossed repeatedly. In this episode, you have Yandy (who was a manager for Jim Jones), beefing with Chrissy(Jim’s now fiancee). This rift caused Yandy to walk out and quit working with Jim Jones, but watching the show, she seems too invested in Jim’s life for someone who was “affected professionally”. I don’t know about you, but even if I was friends with a boss I worked for, if I quit, I’m not hanging around to meddle in that friends affairs!

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All signs in this one episode alone show me that Yandy is in love with Jim, and more than professionally:

  • She criticizes Jim for the money he spends on his FIANCEE Chrissy
  • She sends that ill-fated email ripping Chrissy apart
  • She still hangs out with Mama Jones (Jim’s mother), calling her mom and having quality time
  • She even tries to have a “working” relationship with Cam’Ron, who’s close with Jim and just reconciled with his homie after years of silent hate between the two.

Mama Jones pointed out during their massage session (smh) that Yandy pressing this issue wouldn’t be a good look. You can tell her motherly spider sense kicked in and she saw Yandy was trying to get crazy, and gave her that “you MUST chill” tone of talk. She saw what we all saw. Plus any one with any kind of sense would know that trying to work with Cam after you quit working with Jim would make it hot for no reason. Respect to Cam for telling her that he’d have to run it by Jimmy (#guycode), because doing otherwise would bring unnecessary drama.

I have to give a lot of blame to Jim Jones here. Yandy clearly feels comfortable in speaking her mind about her business partners personal life, which is a problem whether you were friends before or not. As the boss, you have to be able to set rules and regulations where situations like this won’t arise. Jim created an atmosphere for Yandy to interfere in his life, and now will have to reap what he sows until that can be squashed (or the women in his life chill, which they won’t). The minute you enter into a working agreement with another person where money is involved, there has to be a time and place boundary established. It’s the best way to prevent emotions from clouding your business judgement. I can see now why many people I know prefer not to work with friends, or significant others.

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There also has to be boundaries established between opposite sex friends when they enter into relationships. You have to show your friend’s significant other the proper respect they deserve, as they now occupy a special place in your friend’s life. Of course you can have your opinions and make sure your friend isn’t steered wrong. However, when you take into account that people already think that men and women cannot be platonic friends, you have to tread lightly and even go out of your way at times to show that you respect their union. Yandy in these situations is being blatantly disrespectful (even if she doesn’t think so), and her movements can clearly be interpreted as a side chick scorned.

Women’s intuition is the most powerful force in the universe since Hulkamania. When women get a certain feeling, they investigate and discover that more often than not, their fears were substantiated. How many times have you heard a woman proclaim “Girl, I don’t trust him, it’s just something about him.” Even better, on Twitter the amount of “Yandy clearly is fucking Jim” quotes I saw were astronomical! If I can see it, I know women see it, and Chrissy does too, so where does that leave your friend/business associate Jones? How does that not make you two look suspect? Unless that was your plan all along…

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This is why it’s better to keep business and pleasure separate. Build the necessary boundaries and ground rules so that drama is avoided at all cost. When you mix short tempers, ignorant behavior, and reality TV, it is a recipe for nuclear ratchet-like behavior.

So who’s right in this issue? What should Yandy and Chrissy do? Who do you blame in all of this? What rights do friends and business partners who were there before the gf/bf have in their friend’s life?



  1. 80 percent of the blame goes to Yandy – if your about your money and your clients and your representation as a business you never leave a client feeling like your playing with their money. So what if you have a problem with Chrissy that does not give you the right to mess with Jim’s money. You crossed the line with Chrissy and she told u off don’t let that effect your business. Also Yandy is hardheaded even her mentor told her she went over the line. All Yandy should have put in that email is I resign and feel we should no longer conduct business. Yandy was invited to one to many family cookouts and got comfortable.

    Chrissy- Yandy was wrong but Chrissy could have handle the situation a little better because she’s giving Yandy fuel to burn off of everytime she responds with anger. I wouldn’t have even paid Yandy any mind in the club. She said she would stop yandys checks and she did.

    This is why you have to be careful what you tell your work friends or decide how close you are going to let them in your circle especially when they deal with your money directly.

    Side note : Yandy had to have been sleeping with Jim at some point b/c she is way to worried about his and chrissy relationship . Seems like she jealous he picked Chrissy to wife up ( even though she has no known job) vs herself who manages and has helped him financially (booking shows events ) like jimmy I’m independent why do u want her I’m bringing you in cash she just spending your cash.

    1. Nah, Streetz got it right… As put together & rich & masculine as Yandy is… She is still a woman & the rules still apply… This all falls on Jim 90% (Leadership) & 5% each for the fiance & the side chick…

      I know we like to promote gender equality & all that jazz, but it is an illusion I love to exploit…

      1. I agree thats where Chrissy went wrong she should have just let Jim handle it. Yandy was wrong for running her mouth.

  2. Yeah, the shit wit Yandy is fishy. Her ass really thought she was in a higher position than Jim's FIANCEE. I don't get that. That's some SERIOUS delusion. Jim must've been feeding her some SHIT for her to believe she was on that kind of pedestal. She does sound like a side chick scorned.

    I feel bad for her. She seems so invested in Jim's career and his life, and I feel like she feels like she rode for him for real. She was his bottom bitch (word to NC-17) in her mind lol.

    And yup the mixing business with pleasure is a must do mantra. There are only a few friends and family that I would do that with, and that's cause I trust them with my life. But NEVER past or present romantic/sexual partners. I don't even want niggas I'm fuckin with to know where I work lol.
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  3. "side chick" knows her place.."jump off" doesnt……we all remember this, lol….

    Side Piece, usually a female that the guy uses only for sex and other pleasures, she is usually the one that he goes to for that 3-some or some late night head after the club. When Wifey is acting up and Baby Girl is at work, the Side Piece is usually the one to hold him over for a few hrs. He can meet with the Side Piece for reasons other than sex, but normally that only happens one week during the month. Side Pieces are hard to spot when they are out because most of her friends are either Wifey's or Jump Offs. Drawback of having more than one side piece, they usually know each other somehow…we kinda think there is a side piece network.com or something.

    Jump Off…every mans dream and worst nightmare. She is trying to move up in life, wants to be a Side Piece or Wifey but doesn't know how to go about it. They are just the girls he hollas at when he is with his boys…she is usually stored in the cell phone by a nickname because he barely remembers her real name and where he met her…he only recalls how fat her ass was. The Jump Off gets called in emergencies only, when wifey is moody, baby girl is on vacation and side piece is with her baby's father. The Jump Off is extremely dangerous in public for a number of reasons, she is usually 5 other guys jump off as well, so she might cause drama with you and one of those dudes if you slip up, she also has no problem confronting you in the mall when you are with Wifey (something that baby girl would NEVER do) and the most dangerous thing about Jump Off…she ALWAYS seems to find out where you live and or work.

    Jim Jones clean house, lol

  4. I think a woman's intuition is real suspect… Cause it almost never shows up when it comes to questionable mate selection…

    And as I & Teflon beautifully stated in WIMs classic blogpost…

    Jim Jones got sloppy with his sidepiece/jumpoff… And that is where the blame & accountability squarely goes…

    FYI – My big bro LOVES Yandy, and I would too if she had some "white girl swag" like Chescaleigh….

    1. "I think a woman's intuition is real suspect… Cause it almost never shows up when it comes to questionable mate selection…"

      Naw. It does. It does loud and clear. But we're trained to not listen. This stems from the fact that a lot of us aren't confident enough in ourselves and by extension, our intuition.

  5. Yandy in love and open like Walmart (24/7) This is so obviously above and beyond biz that iont know how she says that mess with a straight face!! Denial is a beast indeed. From my pov. Yandy want (andquite possibly already had) some Jimmy frm Jimmy…Chrissy a bit of a loose cannon but she feel that tension and Jim……well ole Jimmy boy just effed up. Bad! Even on the slim shot he didn’t stroke it or give Yandy hope….he still didn’t put her in her place as an employee while he had a shot at containing the situation. I need grown ppl to handle their scandals….or quit creating them!!

    1. So apparently, Yandy's dude got into it with Jimmy. Could it be that Yandy's dude also knows how she feels about Jim? Me thinks yes.

      1. I didn’t know that part but sounds like an affirmative to me!!!! Who wants to witness their mate going so crazy worried about the next person?? Hell I didn’t even know she had a man…she so wrapped up in Jim life when does she have the time? Lol

  6. I dont know who is/was screwing who but what I do know is….Yandy, everyone is NOT your brother! You have clients. Stop throwing around that word brother. Fact of the matter is Jimmy chose his fiancee over you because he had to make that choice. The two of you bickering forced his hand. One day I think you guys (you & Jimmy) will make up but stop it with all the crying and other shenanigans, it makes people suspect that Jimmy has gotten those drawers before. You dont want people to think that do you?!?

    Best of Luck,

    Hebrew Princess

  7. Yandy gets most of the blame here. Yandy made the mistake of trying to be family AND a business partner, which is clearly biting her in the behind. Jim made the mistake of not putting Yandy in her lane. Yandy also has a bad habit of bringing new people into the circle who create drama. Not a good move there. While I wouldn't go on record and say that Jim and Yandy were sleeping together, I do think Yandy has feelings for him that are starting to supercede her business sense. You can't allow your feelings to get you caught up when it comes to matters like this. It's the quickest way to crash and burn. I do think it was a slick move trying to work with someone in Jim's camp just to have access to him and keep abreast of his situation with Chrissy (uh, they're enaged. You will deal).

  8. Ok, let me just say I am soooooo glad you wrote this post. I have been saying from jump that Yandy liked Jim. I knew from the day she talked to Jim in the studio and kept telling him she wasn’t trying ti hurt him (while allowing her eyes to…ahem…sweat profusely) when she offended Chrissy yet she refused to acknowledge that she crossed the line WITH Chrissy. The email PROVED it all, and her mentor even pointed out the obvious.

  9. All I know for certain is that Yandy needs to stand down, remember how Kimbella got decked, and keep it moving, lol…

    What's way more concerning for me is that there are actually women who think like Winter and give wack advice to the Emily's of the world. Lawd, intervene!!!! Fab paid her to make that PSA, lol…

    In my own defense, lol, I do not watch the show regularly and have only seen one episode from start to finish. But, I need to pop in from time to time so I won't be so lost reading L&HH blog posts, fb statuses, and listening to discussions, lol… Its research, lol…

    1. Winter is what's wrong with girlfriend circles. Foolish people surround themselves by other foolish people. Essentially, Winter was giving dialog that reflected Beyonce's Ring The Alarm: Don't leave now cus another chick will benefit from your suffering.

    2. I'm glad someone else notice how silly Emily friend sounds.

      She mentioned Fab's Fame and Money like rappers and entertainers are the only men with money who can take care of a family.

      As far as Fame goes what would Emily be missing out on she has never been spotted on the red carpet with Fab, in magazines or pics, what would she be missing out on by not being there. Emily seems so unhappy forget if Fab had a little money it's not worth her sanity or happiness.

      1. "Whatchu gonna do? Date a school teacher?"

        So much wrong with that. I don't even know where to begin…


        *cue Heal the World*

  10. 1) Jimmy probably initially liked the attention he got from Yandy and eventually enjoyed the beef between Yandy and Chrissy.

    2) Yandy probably didn't think Chrissy would 'stick'. She probably thought she'd go the way of the chicks before her.

    3) Chrissy, for her lack of physical self control, is smart enough to calculate whether or not she should get rid of Yandy. She knows Yandy wants Jim. She knows Yandy was helping Jim make money–money that kept her in shoes and purses. Plus, Chrissy knew to keep her enemies close. But Yandy took the shyt too far. As you stated, Momma Jones knows the deal and has always.

    4) When Yandy was in that studio crying like a girl who got stood up for the prom, I pretty much knew she was in love with Jimmy. Those tears said, "Why won't you choose me? I'm so much better than these other chicks you've dealt with! I've been here for you Jim! Why won't you choose me?!!"

    5) I notice a theme with the women on the show. They are looking for validation through business (Yandy, Olivia, Samaya) or relationships (Emily, Chrissy). They believe men are the gate-keepers to the land of validation. When the truth is, these women could do better for themselves AND attract better men if they really got their minds right.

    1. agree with number 5 all these women at some point had their livelyhood in the hands of some man,Olivia and Rich (even though he is really trying to help her), Samaya and the chubby short guy, Yandy and Jim and Chrisy, Fab and Emily.

      Yandy should have known she would lose this war, Jim's own mother put up the white flag and got over her beef with Chrissy. Plus Im sure Chrissy has been there and done that she knows the game well and knows the stuff Yandy is pulling.

  11. I don't watch this show but here's what i'll say, i'm not sure that Chrissy won and i'm snitching. Jones giving a lot of women hoop dreams right now. That you can stay with a dude for the long haul and after he's done sowing his royal oats he'll throw a ring on it. Only problem with that is that comes at the price of your self-respect. A woman who is the only one who stands by a dude while he's out there hoe'ing it up, canNOT be proud of that ring, look at what it represents. And what's worst is he's got a chick that obviously is in love with him and possibly has had relations with him in the past, standing RIGHT there next to him. These are hoop dreams ladies. Hoping that if you stand the test of time, you'll be the one who makes it out of the rotation and into the mansion with the family. Come on b! You know how many women, Black women, Latina women are in this spot right now? Nobody gonna respect nobody but Jones in this situation. Good work my dude, to them women, Good luck.

    1. I'm sayin…when we gonna get a post about how that was the blandest, "are you happy now, Gina" proposal to ever go down on real life TV?????? LOL. At least Martin was purposefully sarcastic…

      Chicks all in *tears* on FB watching that crap like something wonderful had happened.

      Sad state of affairs, ladies. Real sad…

    2. BTW… Them latinas man… That's all I'm going to say about that…

      It's nothin wrong with women & the situations they go through chasing upper echelon men… It is all part of the fun…

    3. Gotta rock with Dr. J on this one as well. Although Yandy looks bad in this situation, she's still kinda just in the less fortunate of two unfortunate situations (can you tell I'm trying to be nice?) Let's not forget that Chrissy was ALREADY engaged to Jimmy before, or so she thought, because she got fed up and proposed to HIM! THEN to add insult, after not exactly saying yes, he lost it?!?! That was so extremely suspect. Then Chrissy was pretty much in tears and begging him to marry her before he came with that half hearted proposal. And the icing on the cupcake? Chrissy literally said in her post engagement interview "Even if we never get married, I'll love him/I'm with him forever after this (or something to that effect.) o_O

      I can't be the only one who found so much there to be troubled about. I have my doubts that they'll ever actually get married, but then again she seems to be pre-approving that so…Yea Jimmy won.

  12. Yandy probably thought Chrissy wasn't a keeper because Jimmy wouldn't marry her–or get engaged for so long. But that still doesn't mean he's going to choose the woman he comes home to over the woman he works with. Sure, it happens. But if Yandy wanted it to happen, she should have played it completely differently.

  13. Between Nancy, Chrissy, and Yandy, it is abundantly clear that Jimmy has issues setting boundaries. They each go beyond their respective zones and step into areas that really have nothing to do with them. For that I agree with Streetz– even if nothing really popped off between Jimmy and Yandy, the mere fact that she felt comfortable giving Chrissy that book and sending him that e-mail talking about how much he spends on Chrissy speaks VOLUMES about the nature of their relationship. She worked for him, so HE should have set her straight from the start. He obviously never did that, so a lot of this is his fault.

    Yandy is to blame, too…for someone who talks so much about business, she got waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too involved, and she should have known better. I do think that something probably happened between them in the past…just the things she says sound like she's speaking sidechick language. Like when she told Chrissy, "I do YOUR job. I hold Jim down!" Wait…what??? You were his manager, Chrissy is his fiancee. You never had her job and she never had yours. There's only one way you could get that confused…

    Yandy should move the hell on. That was a real snake move trying to work with Cam…then having a spa day with Nancy, calling her mom. Get a new client roster and get some therapy.

    I'm sure Chrissy knows what's up, that's why she brought up the e-mail. And I've always gotten the sense that she had her eye on Yandy. I honestly feel kinda bad for Chrissy– she stuck it out and got that ring, but like Dr. J said, at what cost?

    Also…what your business partner/client does with his/her significant other is not your concern, period. Even if you were there before. You get the rights of business partner and that's it…because that's all you are.

    1. "Between Nancy, Chrissy, and Yandy, it is abundantly clear that Jimmy has issues setting boundaries. They each go beyond their respective zones and step into areas that really have nothing to do with them." – ktcheval

      This is the issue in a nutshell for me! And because Jim Jones apparently never set any boundaries for ANY of them chicks is why I don't fault Yandy as much as most people seem to. I never got the vibe that she was in love with Jim Jones, although I agree that the "my brother" crap needs to stop…EVERYWHERE! Continues below…

      1. 1. Had Jim Jones set any kind of boundaries for what is and isn't acceptable for his mother's treatment of his girlfriend and vice versa, I don't think the sh1t-storm that is "Physichotic B1tch" would have ever happened. He would have never had to sit his Moms down to have that tear-filled conversation on her front stoop a few episodes ago. He wouldn't currently be watching clips of his girl calling his Mom a b1tch to her face…WTF?!

        2. Had Jim Jones set any kind of boundaries for his manager, Yandy wouldn't have been taking his girlfriend (Chrissy) to his show a few cities over (1st episode) like they were best-buds. His manager may not have known about the issues between his mother and his girlfriend. Even if she would have known about them, she wouldn't have given said girlfriend a book on how to be a good daughter-in-law. His manager would have never even been at the club to dance to a song that offended his girlfriend. Continues below…

        1. 3. Had Jim Jones set any kind of boundaries for his girlfriend he would have checked her when she tried to get all up in his business (if he didn't really want her in it, which I don't think he does). He would have nipped-in-the-bud Chrissy's bad mouthing his manager just because she wasn't feeling her. To me, he only threw her the task of "helping" him with his clothing line AFTER her issues with Yandy started and was was for the SOLE purpose of shutting her up, to take her mind off of that, without directly telling her to mind her own business and let him handle it. And we see how well that worked out… She got all into it, glad to be helping her man, but when she asked about her cut and possibly becoming a partner he shut her a$$ down quick, fast, and in a hurry! #Mph… =S And you know there were no boundaries set for Chrissy because every time SHE CREATED a disaster, she went running to Jimmy to handle it like a kid running and tattling on another kid who is being mean to them on the phuqing playground. Continues below…

        2. I'm not saying Yandy isn't wrong, I'm just saying Yandy's being wrong doesn't make ANYTHING Chrissy did RIGHT. That's probably my biggest problem with this whole situation of complete phuck-nuttery! Chrissy's a$$ is just as wrong as Yandy, although for different reasons.

          And I must also say… I understand keeping the peace in your house. I swear I do. But when you’re keeping the peace is starting to cost you every relationship you've ever had…? I think it's time to start questioning a few things. Just like your friends shouldn't put you in the position of choosing your man/woman over them because they'd most likely lose, your man/woman shouldn't make a habit of forcing you to make similar choices. They may not lose, but that resentment of constantly being put in that position will begin to take its toll on you and everyone you've ever cared about in your life. It should even be like that.

          Okay, I'm done. It made me split my comment into multiple posts… #Grrrrr!

  14. Yandy was wrong for sending Jim that email. However, Jim was wrong for allowing this situation to get this far in the first place and Chrissy is the worst of all for taking Yandy do serious. I am sure Yandy meant no harm and was joking when she gave Chrissy the book, as well as when she danced to the song. Was it stupid and distasteful? Yes. Did she mean it to hurt Chrissy? No.
    Chrissy is a miserable, mean, vindictive b1tch who doesn't seem to like anyone really. She might be jealous of the fact that Yandy is a more productive person than she is or will ever be. Seriously, what is Chrissy bringing to the table besides pussy?

  15. Its been obvious that Yandy got a thing fo Jimmy from the beginning of the show. If it's business, there's a line you just don't cross. For Yandy, Jim was more than business. Either she was the jumpoff or a jumpoff hopeful. Either way, she played herself. What she's doing is not a good look at all when it comes to business and no, everybody is not your brother. If you are a professional, you should be able to work with men and not have to call them brother in order to do so. I know some folks don't like Chrissy, but a woman's intuition is on point and Chrissy watched Yandy cross the line time after time. There's just so much a woman is going to take. Yes, Chrissy could have handled it differently, but she wasn't wrong in her assessment of Yandy.
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  16. The REAL reason why Yandy, or Mama Jones, doesn't respect Chrissy is because……Jimmy doesn't. I've been in this situation where I was close friends with a guy (strictly platonic…like family) and we also did business together. I was cool with all of his friends (male AND female), family (mom was super cool), and business connects. I saw all the young ladies that he dealt with and saw how he disrespected his girl on every level. I also saw his girl's flaws in the relationship. How??? Because he shared that information with me. And Jim did all of these things with Yandy too. His mother was also privy to all of it as well. So when Yandy looks at Chrissy like "She ain't nobody" its because thats how Jim looked at her at some point (and prob still does OFF camera). Chrissy doesn't like Yandy because Yandy has probably kicked it with some of Jim's girls, side chicks, and/or jump-offs. She knows that Yandy knows the REAL DEAL about his finances, their relationship, and many other things. Chrissy can't handle that…and THAT'S why she's mad. It has nothing to do with a book. Trust me.

    1. Thank you! I'm glad someone saw the total disrespect. That's why Chrissy disrespects others because he doesn't respect her. She demands it for everyone else but him and when she doesn't get it she acts reckless. Not a good look despite any feelings Yandy may or may not have for Jimmy. If I was Yandy I would move on to other things because obviously Chrissy thinks that Jim Jones is so famous that Yandy will never get another client (NOT!), I heard Cam loud and clear about him wanted to work with Yandy for a while so she must be respected in the industry if Cam is contemplating working with her. Besides from the looks of it everyone now knows about Chrissy and may not want to work with Jim because of her so called influence in his business affairs (remember the comment Jim made about the jackets "yours though default"). Meaning I don't want you running nothing because you don't get along well with others. Let's see how long Jim is relevant after this season of L&HH.

  17. I usually catch the show on reruns b/c a game is always on Mondays night…but from the episodes I have seen, is it just me or is Jim getting a secret thrill out of the women in his life being at each other's throats? I get the impression that Jim is the type of dude that will vent to Yandy and his mother about the ups and downs (95% downs) but then turn around and scold her for not knowing her role…it's the classic, "yeah dawg she's crazy as hell, but I can't leave" syndrome

    Yandy is the type of chick that holds onto that "hope". In fact, if the assumption is she wants to sleep w/ Jim or already has but he dissed her, she's no different than Emily (minus the child in the middle). And it's sad that she can't turn her emotions off, because she seems like a pretty loyal and savvy mgr

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  18. You are so wrong, yandy is not sleeping with Jim and if she is, let me know where I can find a jump off that willl help my husband buy me expensive items.


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