As I get older, I’ve noticed that there has been a paradigm shift in normal traditional and cultural practices in this country. Smoking used to be as popular as baseball here once upon a time. Women would even smoke while pregnant! However, now with increased health awareness and state regulations, we’ve seen less smoking indoors, and astronomical cigarette prices. One shift that baffles me is the presence of men at baby showers.When I was younger, it went unsaid that baby showers were for women only. These were like private parties, where friends and family of the expecting mother got together to celebrate the new bundle of joy. They play games, open gifts, and cackle and kee kee into the night. Men? Yeah we were to stay at home. Any gifts purchased were sent ahead of time with a respectful bow filled with best wishes. Why would we want to go anyway? Other men were guaranteed not to be there, and it wasn’t our place. I knew this thought process changed the minute I got an evite to attend a baby shower. This piqued my curiosity, but it was for a good friend so I said why not? I went and was shocked to see a bunch of other dudes there too! Enjoying the EXCELLENT food and having a great time! That’s when I knew we were in different times.
When did men start attending baby showers and why? I don’t really understand when it began, but I began to theorize so I could comprehend this phenomenon. Did they hear that there was free food and alcohol and were willing to absorb the increased amounts of estrogen to do so? You have a lot of dudes who are “strongly suggested” to attend these events by their significant others and end up at these events. You also have men who are friends with the expecting mother and feel the need to attend. You also have dudes who are invited by the father-to-be, who may entice their boys with food and eye candy as incentives to stop by a baby shower.
Is it because more and more people we know are having kids, and since it’s a younger/more social crowd this is acceptable? I tend to think that now that I’m “grown folks age”, and more of my friends are having kids and getting married, that this may be the circle of revealing itself. Maybe men were always at baby showers and I didn’t notice? I don’t know. Baby showers always felt like a territory dominated by women which men should not tread, similar to bridal showers, sex toy parties, and trashy novel conversations.
While I don’t think baby showers are my speed, I do appreciate women incorporating men, especially the father-to-be’s friends and family. It shows that 2 people made the baby and everyone is being considered. It also doubles up on those registry gifts (sidebar, NEVER be the person who double buys items already purchased. If it’s THAT serious, just bring money!). I also appreciate my friends and family who invite me to these special events. I just don’t think it’s natural for men to be at a baby shower.
What do you think? Have men always been in heavy attendance in baby showers? What do you think is the worst/best thing about attending this event? Which one of you ladies are the one who openly disrespects suspect gifts that are revealed?
Here’s some advice for Father to be, just check out!