Home Featured Five Pseudo “Crazy” Things Men Have Done That They Won’t Admit

Five Pseudo “Crazy” Things Men Have Done That They Won’t Admit

man singing
“I’m goin crraaaazay!” <-You will now think of this song for the rest of the post.

We hear a lot about women burning men’s clothes, keying cars, poking holes in condoms, raking faces, pulling out men’s teeth, filing fake charges, and pilfering men’s wallets in the courtroom, but we don’t hear too much about the crazy things men do…sans the ones that take it too far. The truth is, men can be just as crazy as women, but we just don’t like to admit it because that ain’t cool. Crazy ain’t cool unless it’s CrazySexyCool. You miss those days don’t you? Yeah, me too. Less gimmicks, more music. Anyway… check out the crazy things men do.

I was having a conversation recently about some of the crazy things a lot of us (men) used to do when we were young whippersnappers. At the time, the actions seemed logical. But there’s nothing logical about emotion even though we’ll swear that the craziness was justified in the moment. Looking back though, we realize that we kinda sorta were really possibly maybe wildin out (said with as much hesitancy and awkwardness as it reads).

You wouldn’t know that now because the average guy has learned from the errors of his ways. Why do you think we don’t ask too many questions? Do we ask women not to share certain things with us? Why do you think we have no interest in looking at your phone and want it as least 10 feet away when it rings? Why do you think so many dudes say Drake is wack? He’s striking suppressed nerves and making many of us remember the unsavory aspects of our younger selves.

We know where our minds may go, so we don’t inquire about anything that might turn us green. After all, every man knows about the Hulk gene. We’ve probably showcased it along the way, but just not to you. And that’s the basis of today’s post. I don’t expect everyone to get everything below, **turns and looks at camera** but I expect everyone to get everything below…cuz everybody knows somebody that’s done one of these things or some variation thereof. Let me share with you five generally crazy things men do have done that we don’t admit because crazy ain’t cool.

See Also:  Do Guys Care If You've Slept with Their Friend?

The Passive Late Night Drive-by (Circa 2001 and Still Common Today)

The following takes place circa 2001 between a man unsure of his girl, and his friend that regularly cheats.

Unsuremont: Yo, I don’t trust this chick sometimes.

G-Conscience: Dog, just do what I do to ease my mind. Hop in the whip, drive by her place and see if her car is in the driveway. If it ain’t there, you got some questions to ask. Nah mean?

Unsuremont: Yeah, you right. *Daps up GC and heads outside*

Impressionable and unknowingly insecure, ‘mont hops in his undersized ‘99 Sentra and takes a 30 minute drive to see a Neon, while blasting Black Rob and hoping he doesn’t get there and have to say whoa.

The Late Night Unannounced Stop-by (Still Common Today)

Jaquarius rings his girl’s doorbell at 11:45pm on a Tuesday talking about “Hey baby, just wanted to drop by and say I love you before going to bed three towns over.”

That ***** crazy girl. That ***** crazy girl. Don’t say nuttin’ to ‘em.

AOL Instant MessengerThe AOL Instant Messenger Active, Idle, Active, Idle with No Replies Situation (Circa 2002)

AOL Instant Messenger (AIM) died a slow painful death at the hands of gchat. I mean…AIM’s still technically around, but you don’t log onto that unless you want spam from xxsmoothbooty86xx. Not too long ago — maybe yesterday for you — that idle business (grey name) was a problem. If you sent your boo a message, saw them go active then idle, then active, then idle again with no reply to what you said, there was some splainin’ to do. It was like “Yo, I know you saw my message. The f*ck is going on over there?” And let that name sign off then you hear a door open on your computer speakers like two hours later. You back at your computer desk HULK SMASHING your e-Machine’s keyboard and flirting in another chat box with someone you had absolutely no interest in. Yep, dudes did this too.

See Also:  Battle of the sexes: The Power of the good good

DeadAIM or Any Other Hellacious Chat-Logging Software with Good Intentions (Circa 2003)

DeadAIM was one of the first AIM additions that allowed for tabbed conversations and chat-logging. It’d set up a folder in Documents that contained another folder called Chat Logs. People didn’t really lock their computers back then, sooo…yeah.

We lock our computers now.

It was a gateway to arguments and subsequent breakups. And as we all know, if you look hard enough for something, you’ll find it.

Confirmation Bias = “I F*cking Knew It!” Syndrome

In full disclosure, I set up an Ex of mine that I suspected of snooping. I told her I was using DeadAIM and how cool it was, said I was going to the store, then went outside to my bedroom window to see what she’d do. Within 60 seconds, she was at my computer and in the chat logs. Little did I know I’d set myself up for failure along with her. I turned into the Hulk, tried climbing in the window, got stuck in the frame, and scraped my knee.

hulk in avengers
Slim at the window pre-knee.

That Extra Beep on Call Waiting (Tonight) – One of the crazy things men do

Call waiting was cool until cell phone companies started letting callers know the person was on the other line. This led to men dialing at times they wouldn’t normally dial and a whole lot of “I was just calling to say good night” and one-ring missed calls.

See Also:  What Women Want From Men? ... That's Easy!

In summary and as you can probably tell, we’ve all done some “crazy” ish over the years. And “craziness” hasn’t went away, it’s just evolved. The same stuff men and women were doing 10 years ago, they’re doing today but in a different form. It never really goes away for a lot of us. We just know how to bury it.

By the way, I didn’t define crazy because it’s so subjective and recklessly tossed around by both sexes. Well, that and I wanted to hear (read) what you have to say. Ladies and gents, aside from the clinical, how do you define crazy?  Are the behaviors listed above “crazy” to you? Who do you think takes the overall crazy crown? Any other examples of “questionable” behavior come to mind that I didn’t cover? Let me know in the comments. 

Slim Jackson

P.S. SBM does not condone or support any type of violence. Please don’t take this post left and start talking about OJ or something. Just enjoy it and keep it the way like crazy things men do!


  1. i cannot tell a lie. i did the drive-by once in my life. after i did it asked myself, "self, what the hell are you doing?" the fact that i had to do that let me know that i didn't need to be with that chick. all the others???? can't say that i've ever done that.
    My recent post Take Me Back to 1953

    1. Exactly Mad Scientist…..when u feel like you have to resort to doing stalkerish things, common sense should kick in, and you should immediately begin to question Why. Why you feel that way, why you feel like you need to stalk or keep tabs on someone, etc etc etc. Nine times out of ten when it comes to that, whatever you suspect possibly is and you need to "let it go cause it's another love tko."

      1. I have to disagree with this one. In a lot of cases this may be true, BUT in my experience, some folks are just paranoid. My most recent ex was the craziest of crazies (don't judge me though lol) and he accused me of everything under the sun. None of which I was even remotely close to doing. But then again, come to find out he was doing everything he accused me of and much, MUCH more. Wait…. so maybe there some sort of weird correlation there. I dunno. Moral of the story: Don't date crazzy azz puerto rican dudes who only date black chics.

      2. I will respectfully disagree as well. Sometimes stalkerish behavior is based on men's own insecurities. Maybe that girl is bad (meaning fly) and they don't think they deserve her or think she's too good for them. I had a guy do things like this and I was on my best behavior. He was just cray!
        My recent post The Depression Diet

  2. Haha, especially @ peeking through the window. I'm glad someone is brave enough to admit that y'all some crazy asses too, though you'll probably get hit wit all kinds of man violation flag calls today.

    I actually don't think those things are crazy, unless done repeatedly and/or excessively. The getting mad at ignored messages and flirting out of spite isn't crazy, but immature. The annoyance, mind you, is quite justified. Crazy to me is more along the lines of extreme, obsessive and/or ratchet behaviour. As far as taking the so-called "crazy crown," women generally receive more encouragement to engage in passionate and reckless behaviour where relationships are concerned, whereas men are chastised and try their best to work the cool, calm, and collected angle. But a lot of women don't take kindly to the indiscriminate (or even justified) application of the term, and understandably so.

    Crazy behaviour includes calling [unnecessarily] every half hour, showing up everywhere you know your partner is going to be, insisting that they do every single thing with you and no one else, etc.

      1. lol I'm thinking by the 3rd time, it's a significant problem. People usually know it's wrong from jump.

  3. Crazy is when you call said crazy person crazy and they look at you deep into your eyes and say " Don't call me that "….I'm telling you it never fails, that's the test, call them crazy!

  4. Cosign on the things we don't ask for. And dap for calling Drake's music for what it really is. Alcohol used to be the solo soother to the Hulk's soul. But in any case we learned. Or did cause social media… @'s and wall writings can be triggers for the green fellow. …..

  5. *Cosign on the things we don't ask for. And dap for calling Drake's music for what it really is. Alcohol used to be the solo soother to the Hulk's soul. But in any case we learned. Or did we because social media… @'s and wall writings can be triggers for the green fellow. …..

    1. Sir Fariku I don't think it counts if your inebriated. I think u get a pass for that. Unless your doing it all the time…..then you may wanna consider AA.

  6. To this day i still dont have gchat, i’ve had bbm, kik, voxer, liveprofile and they all died quick painless deaths…maybe i need a chatting app with some stability *housewife shrug*

    Anyway, one person’s “crazy” is the next person’s “romantic”. There are plenty of other crazy keywords like “love hard”, “passionate”, which basically says i want what i want and idc what if i got to be unorthodox to get it. Its that irrational thinking that got you calling one more time even tho the last 12 went unanswered, barricading bedroom doors so you two can talk, and tatting her f___ing name so she knows it real. And for some that crazy ish just might work, for others it leads to restraining orders and having to name your baby girl Keishara now (true story btw smh).

    1. "Anyway, one person's "crazy" is the next person's "romantic""

      Enough Said…

      Just because it's crazy to you and damn near everybody else doesn't mean that someone somewhere isn't thinking "That's so Romantic" right about now. Botttom line, no man or woman has ever truly been head over heels in love OR lust with someone unless they've pulled a sideye worthy stunt or two.

  7. I'll tell you what crazy is. One night i called her cell phone and she didn't answer. I called her home phone and her mother answered and said she went to the store (at 1:00 in the morning????). So I called her cell phone every freaking hour on the hour all night long. (definition:Obsession) I woke up the next morning to go to work tired as hell.

    1. yeah I wouldn't answer your crazy azz either Sweet Mack…lol
      I'm surprised you didn't go to the store looking for her, unless you knew
      it was closed.

  8. Eh, none of that stuff is crazy to me if 1) I don't know it's being done 2) I know it's being done and it doesn't make me uncomfortable. Crazy is showing up to my old spot asking for me several months after we stopped speaking. Crazy is sitting in the front parking lot of my job thinking if your big ass turned your head when I drove by I wouldn't see you sitting there in a rental car with VA plates. Crazy is sketching me from various angles through the day then slipping it to me casually at the end of the day.

  9. Jasmine, I mean Jamal Sullivan anyone, and YES men do that too. I know!!

    Yeah I can laugh about that crazy ish today but back in 2010!!!



  10. One thing that you didn't mention was social timeline checking. Men joke ALL THE TIME about chicks checking timelines and username searching, but men are totally also perpetrators of this crime. I have caught many a man who claims security and being above such things quoting their boo's FB status or tweets from her twitter timeline verbatim!

    The funny thing is, most of the time, yall either ARE or can be pushed to be and do just as crazy things as us. Well…as women. I am a special, special brand of crazy, so I can't imagine a man living up to it. I know men who have keyed cars, busted windows, cut clothes, burned things, and showed up unexpectedly at events just to "check up" on chicks. But, typically, I will admit, those men are usually with/stalking equally as crazy women.
    My recent post The Absolute Train Wreck that is an Unaware Hoe

  11. Crazy to me is leaving to go to the mall with a friend and forgetting my cell phone, only to come back 2 hours later to 22 missed phone calls…. Needless to say that didn’t last long.

    On my part though, I maaayy have called someone a few times one week and not gotten an answer or callback even after leaving a voicemail. So I maaayy have had my roommate call from her phone to see if he’d pick up…. Yeah and he picked up soooo. That didn’t last long either.

  12. They say crazy folks are great in the bedroom! Lol! It's nice for men to actually admit they do stalker isht. The things Slim mentioned aren't that crazy unless done frequently, before spending enough time together or if done after the relationship was over. The craziest that happened to me was bf having a neighbor keep tabs on me and him threatening to kidnap my platonic male friends.

    1. MIA mad guys tell me that crazy chicks give them the greatest sex they've ever had.
      Outside the bedroom though in the light of day they know they just as crazy for gettin with the
      crazy chicks they got with just for sex.

  13. i think i attract crazy men. or something in me triggers a suppressed crazy gene. lol. idk.

    i've had my voicemail, email, and snail mail breached, i've had keystroke recorders (or something like that) installed on my laptop and had my files accessed via some computer remote. someone actually sat outside my place of employment for EIGHT hours while i worked, only to leave when i got off, but not without leaving 3 letters on my car. i've had male friends ask me why someone emailed and/or called asking why they were talking to me. lol. an ex showed up on a date i was on, etc. whew lawd. i'm almost deleted this comment in case my name is being tracked online. hahaha.

    men are cray. all the way cray. *side eyes Slimness*

    1. Muze my b/f was just tellin me how a woman he knows from highschools husband has a gps tracker on her cell phone and knows where she is all the time.
      My b/f now keeps "telling" me I need to be on his cell phone plan and do a shared minutes thing. I'm like "no thank you, I'm good wit my own plan and my own minutes and my own bill that I can pay my damn self."

    2. Well, hot damn! That's a boatload of crazy. I attract men who appear to make a mission of frustrating the crap out of me, but that's about it.

  14. I definitely fell for some CrAzY, a time or two..

    Ok, boy dates girl, girl and boy hit it off…all is well momentarily. Things get a little heated and boy starts to pull back. Said girl is disappointed, but doesn't chase boy and falls back…allowing both some much needed space. Now boy doesn't want to lose the advantage (I'm assuming) so TwentyEleven crazy is to call girl and leave the line open as if she was called by accident, girl falls for the trickery 🙂 and calls boy back and inquires about life after post "WE". Some months past and said boy pulls another phantom call…this time one ring and drops call. Girl is suspicious that boy is up to his old tricks again …but takes the bait. Boy asks if they can hang. A bunch of back and forth for the next few months…still leading to nothing serious. Girl knows that these phone calls are strategically made to stay relevant in said girls mind (heart) perhaps until boy is ready to stop playing around in the streets… boy is no fool…very calculated, Girl stays far away from said boy and his manipulating ways since its kinda hard to keep fooling someone who no longer wants to be fooled!

    *wonders what the new 2012 crazy is*
    I'll scroll up to read comments in a second ^_^

    1. lifecoachtisha the new 2012 crazy is social network ie facebook stalking and tracking and putting a gps tracker on your s/o's cell phone.

  15. Setting your woman up for a lie to see if she will lie is either crazy or dumb. Idk which. I'm leaning towards crazy though.

    1. Oh putting GPS on your woman's phone is crazy too. It's like a lazy stalker. My man didn't do this but I know of some people who had this done to them.

  16. how do you define crazy? I'll go with the dictionary definition – demented, having no sense, repeatedly doing the same thing and expecting different results.
    Are the behaviors listed above “crazy” to you? Actually they are more "stalkerish" in nature. Although stalkers are crazy so……………………
    Who do you think takes the overall crazy crown? Personally, my high-school ex-boyfriend. Circa 1993, my senior year. The days of Reebok classics, micro-braids, and really good hip-hop and R & B.

  17. He bought me a pager that I later realized he bought to keep tabs on me, though he didn't say that out-right. He always "beeped me 911" and when I rushed to a payphone, or to a friends house to use their phone and call back he would say something utterly stupid like, "I just wanted to see where you was and what you was doing." He would also constantly page me if I didn't get back to him fast enough, like numerous times – 10 plus times. One day we got into an argument about it because I was definitely not a chick to try to lock down and keep tabs on, and I through the pager out the window while we were driving to purposely break it and told him not to foolishly buy me another one, and he didn't.

  18. He would pop up at my house unannounced and once when I didn't come straight home from school and went to my girlfriends house he called my dad to tell him I was missing and have him look for me and get in touch with me. He actually sat on my front porch steps waiting for hours like a crazy azz stalker. He was beyond crazy, a total freakin stalker nut-case.
    Any other examples of “questionable” behavior come to mind that I didn’t cover?
    When somebody calls you more than twice after you haven't returned their phone calls. When that number gets past 5 phone calls your treading on thin ice and a borderline stalker and starting to show "stalkerish tendencies" and it's not a good look.

  19. The new age "Crazy" is falling through someone's Twitter mentions and not even following them. I may or may not be guilty of this. Lol

    1. HEY! That's not crazy! I'm going to say it's "curious." I'm not on twitter but ya'll stay talking about it so I get on there from time to time to see what ya'll are talking about, see if I want to join or not.

    2. Crazy is actively pursuing somebody who blatantly tells you that they Do Not want you and Are Just Not That Into You.

  20. Crazy is calling me (I didn't answer) to see what I'm doing and then stopping by my apt claiming to have $1000. for me. Mind you, he wasn't even my man. This was my loctician's man and he had a crush on me. I did not answer the door cause this man is a Vet. He got that PTSD and is capable of anything……negro would call me all hours of the night and leave crazy messages. Had to block every number he called from. Its been a while since I heard from 730 tho…..smh.

    1. Another crazy story is when I was in my early 20's a guy I met on the street coming out of Auto Zone asked for my number and tried to holla. I wasn't interested and I think was dating someone at the time.
      I told him I wasn't interested and he still pursued and kept trying to smooth talk and ask for my number, and ask me out. After a nerve-wracking 10-15 minutes of this I finally told him I was in an abusive relationship and if I gave him my number I would get beat up. He actually still kept trying and argued me down about how I needed to leave my abusive boyfriend and get with him and wouldn't let up. Held up my car door and all. Finally I told him I thought my boyfriend was HIV positive and I was actually coming out of the nearby clinic also. That finally drove his azz away.
      Crazy is also when the Vietnamese dude who just does your nails follows you to your car and tries to holla and holds up your car door and refuses to leave u alone until you give him your number.
      Men who can't take No for an answer are definitely "craaaaaaazy………. deraaaaaanged" <<<in my Martin Lawrence voice>>>

  21. I used to snoop hardcore. And it was a good thing too because I was going out with some seriously cheating men, lol. I'd get a bad feeling, snoop, and bingo: SIX ACTIVE dating profiles. Get a bad feeling, skip the movies and come home and bingo: Dude's cheating on me with a girl IN MY APARTMENT. I eventually just got tired of snooping at all and just trust the bad feeling. Life's too short to be Google-searching your dude's email and trying to guess his phone password.

    Jill Scott said it best: "Comes to the light, comes to the light…EVERYTHING."

  22. This post just makes me feel somewhat better about the fact that at one point in my life, I was super, balls-to-the-wall, over-the-top crazy. I was sneaky, stalker-ish, nosy… all of the above. [It was extremely stressful and not at all worth it, I know that now] Knowing that dudes do it too is somehow comforting.

      1. It just takes a toll on you, always feeling like you need to check up on someone all the time. I just finally realized that it's not worth it. I just had to learn the hard way.

        1. I was just wondering. My cuz was really going through it with her man's ex. She would be calling her and threatening her and carrying on, saying she's gonna win him back. Was cray. A few years later, I got a message on myspace from that chick and she apologized to me for the way she acted. I don't remember if she apologized to my cuz though. She said what made her change was getting a really good (new) man in her life.

  23. I've had only one vato loco in my life, but there was no question that he was crazy. He must have had a tracking device on my car or phone because he would just show up places and I knew I hadn't told him where I was. My friends knew he was crazy too. He got into my email accounts with ease, and emailed guys that I was seeing at the time to tell them personal things about me.

    Also, heads up there are products sold relatively cheap (I'm still paranoid so I gotta stay up on game) that allow people to listen to live phone calls, access text messages, and a host of other things. For those of you who attract crazies, you should research this…
    My recent post The Depression Diet

  24. Only thing I'm guilty of is the drive-by and that was a very weak moment in my life teenage life and first heartbreak. *clinches fist*

    I don't check phones, AIM, emails, etc etc because I'm not one to look for things I don't want to find out. I actually don't do a lot of crazy actions, as I prefer crazy thoughts – no harm, no foul. Plus, it takes a certain breed of woman to truly drive me crazy and I usually avoid or don't run into that breed very often. There was this one time at band camp…

    I will admit that I'm lowkey OCD so if I know how to find a woman I'm interested in, I may or may not find myself there more times than I care to admit. I'm a lot weaker on-line than I am off-line. My mouse has a mind of it's own. Thank God the Internet doesn't have a visitor log. That's all I have to say about that…

    My recent post New Girl: Sex is a sprint not a marathon

  25. I can't help reading this and thinking of the neo-classic Martin Lawrence stand-up You So Crazy–Crazy, Deranged Boyfriend bit!! Next thing you know dude is going to show up in his pajamas at the club coming to get you…good read! I too have had a dude drive by with the slow creep and PARK outside my house then call me.
    "You at home?"
    "Ummmm yeah, it's 3 am…I'm was sleep."
    "Oh..well come open the door."
    Dude didn't get in that night or any others thereafter.

  26. Well, judging from many of the comments by some women a lot of the things listed aren't crazy at all. I'll defer to their expertise in this area and blindly agree. 😉

  27. Crazy is when you break up with your EX and she threatens to kill/cut herself with a dull bootleg switchblade knife you gave her the weekb efore!! WTF was I thinking!

    Crazy women just have that "Look"!!

    1. What's hard is knowing when they're being serious. My friend threatened to shoot himself when his girl broke up with him… he did. Was just a teen. RIP.


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