Home Featured Have Women Become Too Expensive to Date?

Have Women Become Too Expensive to Date?

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woman after money

Let’s crunch some  numbers. According to the most recent Census data, the median paycheck for Americans is $26,364, which means half of Americans made more and half made less. If most women can’t see themselves dating a man who makes $26,000 or less, then we have our answer: No, the average man cannot afford a girlfriend.

I found this quote buried in a HuffingtonPost piece rebuffing the advice of a Princeton Alum who suggested that young women must find their husbands in college or else, because at no point in their lives would they ever be surrounded by so many college-educated suitors with bright, well-paying futures ahead of them. The original letter, which you can find here, ended up going viral and it received mixed reviews from both men and women. As it relates to today’s topic, there are two main takeaways…Click Here to Read More: Can Average Men Afford Girlfriends?

WIM SigRumor has it that these modern day women expect dates of $200, on average. Fellas, has dating gotten too expensive? Ladies, have you found it difficult to find a man that can afford to take you on a decent date? Speak on it!

Comment(115)

  1. I read a quote somewhere that went something like “The cost of dinner is the price you pay for your lack of imagination”. There are so many options that I can’t see how people cannot date within their means. If men outchea trying to do cost benefit spreadsheets for dates then just give up dating. Whether the date was $2 or $2,000 you can’t make me feel guilty or like I owe you something, so why not either do something with me you’ve always wanted to do in the city but couldn’t without a plus one OR just take every girl on a dessert date? It’s fun, you get to know a person, and I don’t have to deal with the beyond-stupid double-standard of not being allowed to bring my date baggage with me but accommodating the “meal-ticket hussy” baggage you brought along with you. All win!!

    1. This…..as a shameless dollarnaire I’ve spent $20 on a date #sheainteemknowit. Free events, groupon, using a cousins EBT to get food so I can cook instead of going out, renting my nephew as an excuse to spend a date at the park….I spend time not money.

    2. Well, on the one hand, it’s good to know that every woman here is a cheap date. On the other hand, speaking for self, when I was single and mingling, rent and dating were my two most expensive line items. Clearly my imagination sucks, but Im just saying since most women’s expectation is that the man pay for *everything until they are in a serious, committed relationship, it’s possible you might underestimate how much it cost to date assuming you’re not paying for anything – maybe all of y’all go 50/50 on all of your dates. This hasn’t been my experience.

      Also, as has been discussed at naseum on SBM and abroad, most men are “dating” more than one woman at a time – not saying this is right or wrong, I’m just saying. If it sprinkles long enough, it will flood; just as even “cheap dates” done enough over time will add up for someone making the average income of $26k, especially if as a man, they’re expected to pay for everything on said dates.

      – sent from iPhone

      1. I agree with the first part. It does take imagination to get out of those froo froo restaurants for every date. However, I don't think every woman expects a man to pay for everything until a relationship. At least I hope not. If this is what is going on then I have been missing out on some free dates. I kid. I think the expectation is probably most dates, but not all.

        Second point, hey, if you got the time to date a bunch of chicks then that is cool, but it will cost ya. : )

      2. "since most women's expectation is that the man pay for *everything until they are in a serious, committed relationship, it's possible you might underestimate how much it cost to date assuming you're not paying for anything "

        I apparently have been hustling upside-down. ( ,._.,)

    3. As a DC native and resident, I'll happily take advantage of the free things going on in the city and plan around those, especially early in the dating game. I remember taking a date to see the WW2 and FDR memorials and just sitting on the benches and talking for like 3 hours. Cost zero dollars and zero cents.
      My recent post What is a “Hard” Problem?

  2. $200 for a date :O??? i would rather want you to buy me shoes instead… i don't know, do something useful with that money… there is no reason to spend all that money for a date!!!

    1. in nyc, (can't state for other citys)…if you hit up a spot and get a top shelf plate…for 2…an appetizer…for 2…2 rounds of drinks…for 2…and add tax and tip…

      you can get close to the mythical $200 date.

      1. I have no problem going to Brooklyn to eat some jerk chicken… LMAO i'm dead serious… Men shouldn't go broke trying to impress women… It's hard outta here, people loosing jobs and stuff, keep your money, and try to get to know me… Or if you really wanna spend that money, i'll take some shoes, no food por favor, i can cook :)! I'm about that simple life :D!!!

      2. WHA????

        When I visit NYC to visit my sister, we definitely eat cheap. There are too many options for us to sit up in some expensive spot. Also, my favorite Thai restaurant is up there and I am not paying a bunch of money on Thai food.

        My favorite dates have been at regular places. Personally, I like Chilis. I am always up for Chilis.

        1. y'all don't really exist in NYC… Lemme tell a double-degree educated chick, from a big name school with a best friend named Sallie Mae, we going out to Friendly's….

        2. Well, you're right. I definitely do not exist in NYC. I live in the South. lol. I do have the double degree and a so-so friend called Sallie Mae.

          But…my sister lives in NYC. She is a double degree chick from a pretty good undergrad and an ivy league grad school. Somebody snatched her up though. She's been married for a few years now. They are out there though. : )

        3. lol But there are restaurants between Friday's and Che Piere's … lol There are a lot of nice Thai food, soul food and other gems in the city that people eat ate, you just have to be creative, plus Groupon never hurt no one.

        4. If a double degree from a big name school means she can't eat out somewhere regular then you have found yourself what I shall call a "bougie poser". There are waaaayyyy too many great places to eat in NYC that don't cost an arm and a leg. My girlfriend, now wife, blew my mind when she took me to this little spot called Mardi Gras that was on Queens Blvd out in Forest Hils. I'd been going to that area for years and never knew about it. Some little small spot but the food, cajun style, was RETARDED!!!! Sad that spot is gone

        5. Totally agree with you and larnelw. Just pick something unique/different with "that" type. If she doesn't like it, I'm sure another woman would. There's a shortage of good black men, remember? Just no chain restaurants.

        6. Excuse me while I go send e-mails to my double and triple Ivy League degree friends in NYC to inform them that they no longer exist. This is urgent. I may need to find a therapist too because I've been talking to imaginary women for almost a decade . . .

      3. I'm a steakhouse man. Ive eatten at some upscale quality steakhouses in NY and still not come close to the $200 mark. Talking $35-$40 steak, 2 sides, appetizer and drinks (non-alcoholic). There are plenty of city restaurants that wont break your pocket out here.

  3. while i think it does get expensive, over time…i think we as males do ourselves a great disservice when we just get lazy and look for a spot to eat. i guess males need to figure out what their objective is when dating the opposite sex…and if their intention is to find a mate to marry…they should find activities that bring the female a bit closer to his world (this is where groupon, livingsocial, sh*t, even travelzoo come in). even with the restaurants, there are enough small spots, dessert spots (if you live in the east coast) that it won't do you too much damage..if money is a big thing…first meeting should be a (non-starbucks, non-DD) coffee house.

  4. My thing is I date for me. There are times when I'd like to spend an evening with a beautiful woman over a meal. W can enjoy good conversation laughs and each others company. I try not to focus on the dollar amnt attached to that moment and just enjoy it for what it is.

    1. This right here!!!

      But seriously, I hate it when people are so concerned about money on a (first) date, if you don't have enough to pay, then you don't have enough to date. And that goes for both parties. Women don't order a steak, if your account is low. Guys, take her to a spot that will be friendly to your wallet.

      The goal of dating is to get to know people right. Unless you are just looking for a free meal, or potential applicants to your "roster"

    2. I must agree also SD. If I want to hangout and wouldn't mind the company of a nice attractive female, than it is what it is…The price should not be the main focus because I am doing something I want to do also. I will say though since I am in the process of looking for a wifey, I have to date smarter out here.

  5. 1. If you are a simp or as Maris says have a “lack of imagination” than yes dating is expensive.

    2. If you are going to she’ll put $200 & you want some poon at the end of the night, get the poon first then take her out. This way all parties are happy.

    3. Don’t date with your wallet. Just go to the park, library or museum or your house.

    4. If she wants to go out, let her finance it.

    Goodnight

    1. Co-sign on all your points, except the second part of #3. I don't understand why you got so many negatives.

      Regarding the second half of #3, I wish a dude WOULD attempt to take me to his house for a first date. No bueno. There's nothing going on at your house that is conducive to getting to know someone.

      And #4, agreed, if the date is her idea (AFTER like the 2nd or 3rd date), then she should offer to pay for some if not all the activities. It's up to guy if he'll let her.

      1. " I don't understand why you got so many negatives. "

        folks will shoot the messenger, even if his message is 2+2=4. funny enough it doesn't faze him.

  6. No.

    And a $200 casual/non-relationship date would make me nervous, lol. I also prefer lunch/brunch/day time dates, which would make $200 dates all the more weird in my opinion.

    The only expensive outings I've ever been on were for special days, and even then it was with a significant other.

    This idea of the mythical $200 date really bothers you, huh Wis? Pretty sure I've seen you reference it a couple times before on Twitter, lol….

  7. It becomes too expensive when the young lady just want to rock with you in the sense of a girlfriend that take her everywhere and pay for everything rather than it being a mutual exchange. Expensive women to date simply do not respect gender roles IMO.

  8. It’s odd that people (women) go to immediately talking about how they don’t need an expensive date, they’ll take less. That’s not what this article was about. You have to read first. Also, when you make 26k unless you live in super rural America, you’re broke. You could never date even yourself.

    The funny thing is, I’ve never felt I couldn’t afford to date anyone. Anyone who I felt someone would need to “afford” I’ve never dated. This is all a funny conversation to me but its likely because I don’t date in circles where degrees and salary are conversation topics. Not that it doesn’t matter, I just don’t talk about it.

    Most of all, you could flip it. Lot of women can’t afford the men too. Cats want hair done, nails done, everything waxed, matching panties and bras, fresh pair of heels, even the dress down has to be lululemon and Tom’s. that’s just so a man will feel he’s dating an attractive woman. That’s expensive as hell.

    I digress.

    1. +1 .

      "Most of all, you could flip it. Lot of women can't afford the men too. Cats want hair done, nails done, everything waxed, matching panties and bras, fresh pair of heels, even the dress down has to be lululemon and Tom's. that's just so a man will feel he's dating an attractive woman. That's expensive as hell. "

      Add in: your grocery bill …cooking for one becomes cooking for two

    2. Good point, J. Another point of interest I’ve seen so far: If dinner is not the only or primary means of dating, then why is everyone focused on “dinner dates”? Inquiring minds want to know.

      1. I'd say that most dates have a concept of dinner (or a meal) in them just because we tend to get hungry if we're out for a long period of time. But you can do things without making that the primary part of the date. Take for instance Washington City Paper. It lists a whole list of free things going on that week in and around DC. Sometimes they're corny things that I wouldn't be caught dead at, other times they're things like art exhibits or poetry readings or plays – just things to do.

        If you plan a date around something like that, then (from my experience) you're more likely to get away with going to a carryout to grab a meal instead of trying to go to the place that's got 5 stars on Yelp.

        There's also the option of doing something original like a picnic which can be both romantic and pretty cheap. Its all about imagination and using all the resources available instead of just having a prescribed "dinner date" every Friday night.
        My recent post What is a “Hard” Problem?

        1. Dinner dates don't take as much effort for some ppl. It’s a quick idea vs. having to go online or in the newspaper to look up events.

          I actually don't mind (especially in the summer time) walking and talking outside… South Street Sea port, Central park, Bryant Park, etc… in the beginning I rather just do things were we can talk , it doesn’t have to be something big, just something where we can enjoy each other’s time.

        2. I think somebody said it above, there's a whole rack of things I've been wanting to do for a while but didn't have a tag-along, or didn't have the time to do it, or are things I do regularly. Some of these things are costly (like going to a Wizards/Caps/Skins/Nats game), some aren't (like going for a run or a bike ride). But depending on who you're going out with you can make stuff creative and lead to your own conversation topics which is another problem on some of these dinner dates – cause I hate that "how was your day" conversation.
          My recent post What is a “Hard” Problem?

        3. Washington City Paper

          Good point Aftermath. Actually someone recently introduced me to a similar, free paper in our neck of the woods that I didn’t even know existed. I’ve def used it as a go to source. Also, when I first moved here and didnt know anyone or anything, I used the “visit Denver” website to see what events were going on throughout the year. I still do, sometimes. At the time, it wasnt for dates but I do think most cities have a “free paper” or “visitors website” that people are probably sleeping on as far as cheap or new date alternatives to the traditional “dinner and a movie”.

        4. YAY on the Washington City Paper. We have a local version where I am in SC as well. AWESOME reference. I can find out where local bands are playing. What shows, musicals, or tours are going on in the area. Any festival, exhibit or food truck location is in that paper. A lot of times the events are free. I love it. It is definitely a good resource.

        5. Thanks for the Washington City Paper tip. I live in DC myself and about to get back in the dating game after being idle for a minute (grind mode trying to get a crib). Never knew the City Paper had events and such. I am from the south and we traditionally do the dinner and hangout or going to a comedy show which can be expensive(considering the chick is a newbie that I am trying to get to know). I must say, I have never spent 200 on a female that wasn't in the wife category.

      2. Seems most people don't really think of two people spending time together as counting as a date unless it involves sitting down around some meal. Honestly when I think "date" the idea of food is always involved though I am very aware that it doesn't have to be.

    3. Most of the wimmins were answering the question in bold, not responding to the article. I've long given up on saying I'm a cheap date cause I haven't BEEN on a date in ages, lol #CuffingSeasonCasualty

      But seriously, while I completely understand the article, I think the only place it really makes an impact is in major metropolitan areas (and even then, the convo is mainly in the Black community), because 70% of us are walking around these parts without degrees (& 85% don't have a passport), but you wouldn't know it if you lived in NY. So, while 26K seems unfathomable to US to maintain a social life, you got men working in McD's with 21 babymommas outside the city.

      1. Ok amaris79 i'm in tears, laughing way too hard because of your message… olala, 21 babymommas? no passeport? LMAO stop it already i'm dying!

        1. i stand by what i said. if you live in manhattan by times square with four kids and a wife that doesnt work, 26k is dead broke. if you single and live in west virginia where you can get a 1800 sq foot townhouse on the water for $300 a month, 26k is far from broke. you need to look at regional and state to state poverty lines to get an actual idea of how people are living rather than the national one which is generic and doesnt apply to all 300 million people.
          My recent post GUN CONTROL – WHY?

        2. This is absolutely correct. I think because so many contributors on this blog live in or near major metropolitan areas they either forget or simply don't know how in expensive it is to live in some places.

        3. That's accurate. Being from the south (SC), if you are making $10/hr which equates to about 21K a year, you can live ok. I know cats paying $800 a month for a decent crib living in Columbia, SC, but here in the DC Metro area, you would definitely be dead broke renting out a room somewhere.

        4. Agreed…$26K is broke..im a student who makes about that much and still cant afford ish..parents still gotta help me out with a few things…i call that broke beyond words

  9. I definitely get the point of the article. To be clear, broke people been dating and getting married since forever so I don't think it is holding anyone up. It all goes back to priorities. If you prioritize expensive dinners, clothes, etc then yeah it will probably hold you back. If you are in it for other less superficial reasons than it probably matters less.

    And no, never found a guy that couldn't afford to take me out on a date. Didn't even have that problem in high school.

    1. To be clear, broke people been dating and getting married since forever so I don’t think it is holding anyone up.

      Well, statistically, the less educated a person is and the less money they make, the less likely they are to get married, so it’s holding some folks up.

      never found a guy that couldn’t afford to take me out on a date

      Are we/you assuming that because he did take you out on a date that he can afford to take you out on a date? Because people do things they can pay for but can’t afford all the time. Dating is just one of those many activities.

      1. Statistically that change has occured within the last 5-10 years. Only recently have the marriage rates for those with only a high school diploma been less than those with a college degree. The stat I looked at was checking at age 30. So, for the most part, before that period of time, the rates were about the same, if not slightly higher for those without a college degree.

        My statement was in reference to the fact that it does not cost an arm and a leg to date. And even in high school I didn't have a problem finding someone who could afford to take me out. Quite sure it didn't even cost $30 for us to eat pancakes at Alex's or a salad at Ruby Tuesday. It was high school. We weren't heading down to any place he couldn't afford. Also, whether it is high school or even now, what you can and cannot afford is on that person. If you say funds are low, I can treat, we can stay in, or we can go to a free event. I don't know anyone's financials so it is up to them to inform the other person if they just can't do it. If you fail to do so, then that is on you.

  10. Lol. I really wish we could put an end to this 200 date conversation. IDK who started it .

    In all honesty dating is an expense but it’s not “too expensive” unless your jobless or messing with someone who isn’t realistic about your circumstances.

    I’m 22 a yr out of college working an entry level and a side job, most of the guys I’ve dated are in the same predicament or just starting off their career. I’m realistic about what they can do for me. At the same time I appreciate the effort and enjoy doing various things that don’t cost 200$. I don’t mind going to Red Lobster once in a blue, I’m from NYC so there are a lot of affordable non-chain restaurants that are great eats. Now of course on a special occasion like a birthday I would like to do something extra if possible.

  11. i am an older woman, trust when I tell you I have been to very expensive places and the food is not always good or filling. (small meat and a lot of sauce). I am a healthy girl with a healthy appetite and red lobster does me fine, lol.
    In all seriousness, its not the food its the conversation. Spending time and getting to know someone should be the priority and not the cost of a plate of food.

  12. $200 bucks? Where? Who?

    I would not want anyone Im dating to spend $200 on me. Especially not in the early stages. I dont care if you have it like that or not. Im very frugal and I want a man to be more conscience about where his money is going. $200 on one night is ridiculous anyway.
    My recent post Real Housewives of Atlanta Part II

  13. $200 for a date? WTF!?!?!?! Have I been out the scene that long? When did this happen? I can't fthom dropping that much on a single date unless it was a special occasion. Perhaps an anniversary of some sort. A holiday or some other special occasion. Especially being in NY. There are too many places to eat nd things to do that are relatively inexpensive even without Livingsocial, Groupon and the rest.
    If I was single and some women came at me with a $200 date expectation my reply would be simple "Well…..sweetheart….let me tell you what I expect…"

        1. $200 is not unreasonable to spend on a date. It is unreasonable for anybody to think they only deserve $200 dates, but best believe they do happen. And nudity down not always ensue.

          And really, if you feel that after spending a certain amount of money that sex is automatically owed, then you have a problem.

        2. Your sensitiviey to my response is leading me to believe that you are just such a woman that expects to be wined and dined to the price of a car note….LOL

          Well as I said, if a woman came at me with expectations about how much I have to spend to take her out then I have expectations of whats going to happen when I the date is done. Don't go talking about you have caviar tastes and can't eat anywhere where the bill is less than 3 digits and think that you aint coming off something on the back end….pun intended LOL.
          Bring no ridiculous expectations and you get none placed on you.

        3. No, I live in South Florida, so your money can get spent really fast down here if you're not paying attention. Going to a Heat game or most of the plays, performances, or restaurants (non-chain) with a bar tab can total upwards to $200 on any given night. Just saying, from my experience, that's not unreasonable. However, some women do trick off for guys that do that.

          Personally, I'm not impressed by how much money a particular guy spends. I just don't like cheap people. Period. It does seem by your response, that you may be such a person that may enjoy all that nickeling and diming. You can have that, lol

          And the issue was your expectation of sex IF you were to spend that much. That's the problem I had, and still have.

          Lastly, if a woman came at you with expectations of how much you should spend, then you ought not to date her. However, if you are trying to get to know a lady, then WOO her. Woo does not mean spend money lavishly. Be creative. Do something else.

        4. Are you still on this? Really? You seem to be picking at a couple of my words here. A couple of my words there. And then coming up with…..well, all of that.
          Why is it everyone else seemed to get the joke but you?
          What man would really date a woman that put a price on how much it costs to date her?
          How is it you have so heavily latched on to this post I made but completely glanced over the rest in which I very clearly state that there are a number of ways to go out and enjoy a woman's company without spending a fortune?

          And as for woo'ing a woman. I need no instruction. I'm very good in that area. You could just ask my wife.

      1. WTF? 45k a year and a $1475/month rental. She is crazy. $500 or $1000 a month for credit cards?

        Where they do that?

        Also, I should note that she was dating investment banker types. In NYC especially, they usually bring in well over 6 figures. The ones I knew were making over 200k depending on their level. I just don't think dudes making "okay" money would be tricked as easily. Also, not to be controversial, but I saw pics on the second link and I have to admit, that only a certain type of chick could pull this off. Maybe I am wrong, but both women were extremely attractive.

        Not saying that regular women haven't done it, but…

    1. Why they gotta be "hoes"?
      Just saying…that's the type of lady that he wants to be with.
      Seriously, if anyone wants to date that kind of person then more power to you. *shrugs*
      (SN: And men talk badly about gold diggers…but still date her? What do you expect? hmph!)

      1. Just figuratively speaking, LOL. I'm just trying to reiterate my point that any woman is ridiculous to expect a man to drop that much money on a date, especially if it's their first date/just started dating, I think any woman who expects C notes to be dropped like that should be able to do the same for a man but we know it often doesn't go that way. And some women are all to happy to drop their draws once they realize a man is spending money. But to some of us women, money is the root of all evil…….I'd rather go to sleep after a good date knowing we connected and had a great time rather than getting off on the fact he blew a huge wad of money.

        1. I got ya…Im just tired of ladies getting pushed under the bus when it takes 2 to tango!
          If he's got it to spend then YOU deserve the same treatment, period.
          It ain't tricking if he's got it…

  14. Do guys like froyo? I'd take a Red Mango date over a dinner date any day.

    But to be quite honest, if I'm attracted to you, just spending time with you is good enough for me. Whether it's sitting on your front stoop just talking and laughing, or taking in the sights on the Coney Island boardwalk or Brooklyn Promenade, I'm down. Just keep in mind…there's a difference between being frugal and being plain ol' cheap.

  15. Who you take out on a date and how much you spend on it is ENTIRELY your choice. ENTIRELY. There is nothing more mind-boggling to me than people who cry about the cost of dates all the time. You know you don't have to right? You know you can go through life not having to spend $200 on a single date right?

    This is the issue we seem to be having. We want to keep up appearances all the time. And then wail about how much it costs us to keep up those appearances. There are women who would balk at the idea that you're spending $200 on a single date, because they consider it an insanely high amount of money. Then there are those who will wrinkle their noses at how cheap a date you are for only spending $200. YOU HAVE A CHOICE, SIR.

    1. Truth Be Told: "There are women who would balk at the idea that you're spending $200 on a single date, because they consider it an insanely high amount of money. Then there are those who will wrinkle their noses at how cheap a date you are for only spending $200. YOU HAVE A CHOICE, SIR."

      Being that I'm late to the party, I'll add my cosign here. I ain't never pay no $200 for a date for someone that wasn't an official girlfriend. And yes, I just used a triple negative.

      $200 on a date for someone you barely know is the definition of tricking. Yes, it is even tricking if you have it.

      1. Co-sign all-a-diss!!

        I would spend $200 or more to take my wife out for a special occasion. But if we are just dating and I barely know you…aint any tricking happening over here. Putting your best foot forward during the initial dating phase goes but so far. I WAS more inclined to let a woman see what she will be dealing with on a daily basis.

  16. I agree dating is expensive. I don't live in an expensive area, so I think $200 is a little on the high side. Although I don't think any new guy I was dating spent upwards of $200 on a single date on a regular basis, he may have done it once or twice, he's definitely spent $200-400 a month on me for various dating activities. I could see how if a man was dating multiple women, this would indeed become extremely expensive.

  17. Discussions like this are IMHO exactly the reason i've checked out of the "dating game" I found myself floundering in during my 20s. I personally have no desire to prove my worth to anyone based on the venue I take them and the amount the check equals too. Any woman that thinks like that is underserving of my attention and company.

    I do "hang out" whereas there is no pressure and I don't go over say $30. That could cover a light appetizer and a drink or two, but the focus is getting to figure out Who the F this person is on the other side of the table, not to make plans for a future wife. The last outing I was on was cool: Wings, walking around stores talking about any/everything and then a drink at Starbucks. What was good is that homegirl broke bread and bought the drinks, but it showed that she wasn't out to mooch like a lot of these Professional Meal Hounds.

    I actually feel sorry for the youngsters coming up behind me in my family. I have no clue what to tell them about dating.

  18. It's pretty funny that I was having a conversation with a few guy friends of mine that referred to me as having a couple of the "Date Heaux" characteristics. A Date Heaux is an opportunistic woman that agrees to go to dinner with a man for the sake of a free meal or outing. I'm a foodie AND a broke college student. So I would not hesitate to take up an offer to a free meal at a new restaurant! lol but after our conversation I re-evaluated my dating decisions.

    If you guys are familiar with the 5 Love Languages, it is a book describing the 5 ways people express and interpret love. My top Love Language is Quality Time. I don't care as much about a man spending his car note/rent/child support check on a date with me as much as I care about us spending time one on one. Honestly I much rather have a Call of Duty date where we snack on some food and play video games all night, go to the gun range, go to a game. All of which I would offer to pay, but maybe male ego wont allow them to see a woman pay for her own.

    Is it impressive that a man can wine and dine me at the fanciest restaurants in the city, yes. But at the end of the day we can eat frozen burritos from 7/11 and find less conventional ways to spend our quality time than at an overpriced restaurant. I plan on doing a video on this topic soon.

    1. The ego thing. No one brings up the fact that some dudes insist on paying. Had one dude snatch my card back when I put it in the folder to give to the waiter. I fixed him though. When the waiter came back I just gave him the card directly. He was MAD about that. What, pray tell, do we do about those dudes?

      It isn't always women demanding expensive dates.

  19. As a writer I have one thing to add: never generalize. Growing up me and my crew werent into gossip. Rumors spread we either confirmed or denied and that was it. While in the hood as a teenager or in college of course there are rumors but I don't discuss rumors. I still have no idea why half the dudes who got shot got shot and really don't know if that's sons baby. I don't care.

    Also to stay above the fray I went the old tried and true methods. You'd be amazed at how effective "I dont know" or "no" or "so" is, you guys should try it.

    I didn't care who was sleeping with who. If she ain't sleeping with me there was (and is) nothing to talk about. And if she does sleep with me there is even less to talk about.

    Gossiping is arguing everyday the world is flat.

    1. As a writer I have one thing to add: never generalize.

      I read and re-read your comment, and I have to say “never generalize” is easily in the top 5 dumbest pieces of advice I’ve ever heard a “writer” give. I hope I’m misunderstanding your assertion – and maybe I am, but frankly, every opinion is a generalization. There are very few arguments that are not subjective in nature. This is why I think the retort, “well X doesn’t do that” is such a stupid comment to make by most people on the Internet because aside from facts like “1+1 = 2” very few, if any, arguments/debates account for 100% of the population 100% of the time.

      As long as people don’t argue opinions as facts, I’m fine. If people want to generalize, as long as they are open and honest about their generalization, I have no problem with them choosing to do so, as is their right, especially in the case of opinionated, free-thinking, or creative writers. However, concluding that no writer should ever generalize makes no sense. In fact, saying that very statement is a generalization of writers in itself, which makes the statement make even less sense than it already does not make – generally speaking.

      – sent from iPhone

  20. Oh the $200 date debate! Gotta love it! I don't expect anything when I am asked on a date other than respect. Whether a man takes me to the halal cart or Masa I only expect he treat me correctly. If I want to go to an expensive restaurant – I take myself. If we end up at an expensive restaurant I say thanks and keep it moving.

    If a woman has "expectations" you can't live up to – then don't & just accept you aren't meant for each other. I think there definitely are women who expect the $200 date but truth of the matter is – most men who can't afford said date would never get said woman's attention ANYWAYS…

  21. The thing is, and has always been, broke men have to be more creative. Wendy's probably won't work as a good date for any woman. But a $15 comedy show might turn out to be the night of your life. Or maybe that free spoken word show. Or a picnic in the park. Bowling alley. Maybe a free concert in the summer time. A game of pool. The list of dates under $200 goes on and on and on. Hell a simple google search can give you some ideas of things to do if you really have NO CLUE. A woman just wants to know that you put the effort in to show her a good time and get to know her. Unfortunately, a man's financial status has almost NOTHING to do with how creative he is or how much effort he will put in. As a result, it often looks like the guys with more money put in more effort and do the things that ladies want to do. And many men suffering from a light wallet use that as an excuse to put in less effort. So they get looked over and passed up.

    I don't care what's in his bank account. But I will not settle for someone who doesn't think I'm worth the effort of putting a decent date together. And decent doesn't mean expensive. It just means planned and thought out.

  22. I agree dating can be expensive. I also find it hilarious when women keep saying they haven’t been on a 200 date. Maybe it’s because I live in DC, it’s very easy. Try tickets to a wizards game and eating. You can easily spend that kinda money. But I digress. I guess the “expensiveness” of dating is why negros always trying to get girls to be friends with benefits or booty calls.

    1. Yahtzee!!!

      Oya, Wizards game, Bar Louie after the game for drinks and that's an easy $200 even with a LivingSocial coupon.

  23. ANNOUNCEMENT

    "Ladies, have you found it difficult to find a man that can afford to take you on a decent date? Speak on it!"

    Me and WIM HAVE some things to say about the women who are very successful at this. COMING SOON.

    1. No not at all. It's easy to find a man willing to spend too much money too soon. There are a lot of dudes who think that's the magic recipe. Like an expensive date all of a sudden makes them more attractive. These are the same men who get PISSED if you don't act like it's your first $200 date in life and throw your panties in w/ the check.

      1. It's not that at all.

        I'm also not one of those dudes who think that's any type of magic recipe. I think it's odd when people tell me that it's dudes out there like that. I think in my network, that's just the minority. I mean, where does that convo really go?

        guy #1: I spent $200 on a date.
        guy #2: I got my girl a table for $1,000 on her birthday.
        guy #3: I met a girl one time in Vegas that I fell in love with on one night, flew her to LA for the week with me, all expenses paid.

        Like where does that go and what's the purpose of that conversation?

        Now getting away from $200 dates and ish. I think it's tacky for men to allow women to know how much they spend on them unless it's hindering them from achieving other relationship goals. For example, "I don't think it's wise for us to go to that restaurant when we're trying to save for a house."

        PS – I also wouldn't pop a girl's "$200 date" cherry.

  24. If you have it spend it. All the women are saying $200 is insane for a date, if a guy takes her to dinner, plays, sports, etc. every date, they're not going to complain or even notice the amount of money he is spending. Most women are going to fall into the lifestyle that the guy is presenting. If he presents broke, making ends meet lifestyle, walks in the park will do. Or if he presents Benz, nice home,and Capital Grill. Red Lobster will get the side eye (Red Lobster is broke food, just saying). And the same goes for guys, if the women presents a certain lifestyle you adjust finances or don't bother with her.

    1. so sorry! i tried to hit like and hit unlike 🙁 i really like your comment. and i really love red lobster LMAO

  25. “Ladies, have you found it difficult to find a man that can afford to take you on a decent date?”

    I haven’t. I only date men with money so this isn’t a problem. Lol…I’m jokingly serious. I like nice things however this does not mean I can’t enjoy going to Chili’s, Friday’s or Outback.

    I keep myself up and look my best. Men appreciate this and spend money on me. Two hundred dollars is nothing for a lot of men.

  26. I'm not sure if the right question is being asked here. 1.) I don't think women have become too expensive to date. Dating can be expensive but it's not women's fault. 2.) Paying for the date should not be the responsibility of the man…I know a lot of people won't agree with me on the latter point but it's true. I think it's lovely when men offer to pay for a date but it should be an offer and not an expectation. If both are on the same level regarding this principle I think dating would be easier and more relaxed for both involved. I also agree that there are many options besides expensive options to date that people can choose to do. Dating should be fun and carefree and not wrought with tension and expectations because folks don't want to defer from the norm.

  27. Usually on a first date I setup us getting a drink, going to the park,hit the arcade up, or something also those lines. I will tell a woman not expect dinner and movie or anything like that because I feel like thats for later on in the relationship. The last date I went on with this woman I just meet, We went to walmart and movie. The one I had with another woman, we just went to the park.
    Women do want men to do different things instead of dinner and movie but what fool is going turn down a free dinner(most of the time) and a free movie?

  28. Guess it helps I enjoy food, I have no problem spending $$$ on a nice steak/sushi dinner. Spend according to your interests. You can make an evening of put put seem like a honeymoon if you do it right.

  29. $200? Apparently I haven't been on the dating scene in quite a few years, cause that missed me. Whether one is able or incapable of scraping the money together for a lovely evening is irrelevant, as the cost of the date shouldn't matter, but instead the quality and connection the two individuals have despite what they decide to do. In the end, women are definitely not too expensive to date, but they can be if the man feels some sense of obligation and pressure to go all out to impress his love interest.

    I'm going to go a little left with this.

    If you're a male relegated to dating in 2013 out of necessity, something is seriously wrong with your ability to procure the attention and affection of the opposite sex. Have you seen the streets? Its flooded with punash. In these times, dating isn't necessary but is more so residual pageantry of the mating dance of yesteryear. To engage in such outdated practices as a means to garner the interest of the fairer sex is laughable.

    If it is to gauge your own interest, then paying $200 seems hardly worth the investment to determine if you merely ''like' the person. There is far better things to do with one's financial resources than to pay someone to allocate a moment of their time with you. One is better off spending that money at a strip club. At least he is guaranteed to see some @ss that night.

    But all jokes aside, unless it is someone you have been dating/seeing/spending considerable time building with, I find it difficult to justify treating someone you don't know or even HOPE to know to a lavish evening on your dime. If the two of you are mutually interested in getting to know one another, there is no need for one party to foot the bill. Dutch. It is 2013 not 1950. Additionally, if it is only one person who is interested, then the date shouldn't be happening in the first place saving both time and money in the end for the poor chap who has to fork out loot on reciprocity that is not guaranteed.

    I really have to stop commenting so late at nights. Incoherence…..

    Mr. SoBo
    OpinionatedMale.com

    My recent post My Rants On Twerking, Interracial Relationships And Celebrities

  30. Our American women are clowns who lead the world in abortion,obesity,single motherhood and divorce,who as independant women are always flat broke having massive credit card and college debts,while claiming to be strong women are morbidly obese,leading the world in obesity.

    Most women dont know how to play any traditional roles,while refusing to play them if they are able,while requiring a man at all times to provide for and protect a woman,to play his male traditional roles,to open “super womans,”doors,buy super women drinks and take super woman on a trip…like they are an adopted puppy…..

    Women in America think they are gods and are looking to be adopted financially,emotionally and given a free place to live,a house,car etc….We have some of the most spoiled rotten,entitled,overpriced,narcissistic,oversexualized selfie phenomenon kind of women who stick their as#es out where the poop comes out,like oversexualized insane animals….Who bring nothing to a mans life strife and pain.

    American women initiaite 75% of the 50% of all marriages that end in divorce,have aborted 60,000,000 babies with the morning after pill available, while men are denied the right to opt out of fatherhood,who celebrate fat acceptance while little kids in the world die of starvation,who claim to be equal to men who have salty balls,while everything a woman will touch today was delivered,manufactured,invented and set up by men.

    Men created womens epidural,c-section,abortion,morning after pills,daily contraceptive pills,their i phones,every inch of road women drive on,every building they walk into….etc…

    When women declare that we are all equal,women are saying men are equal to women who endure the pains of child birth and the pains of their periods,which men are not.This is how insane the western woman is….Her mental illness is so obvious,that men are starting to avoid her for the first time in world history.Men are starting to say,”ENOUGH!!”

    In America,we have the lamest,most over priced,delusional,mentally ill poor excuse for women,the entire world has ever witnessed…..Of course women as described who are so shallow and destroyed are never going to the message.

    American women are the nuttiest nuts in a countries moral collapse salad,the world has ever witnessed.Our women are so insane,that they have men running from their low cut blouses,and have kicked in mens fight or flight mechanisms,who run right past the willfully oversexualized western woman….

    I predict that womens behavior is going to worsen in the future,in the idea of their own oversexualization,as more men refuse to date or marry them.False rape accusations for attention and money will escalate,especially in a system where women make false rape claims and get no jail time.Skirts are going to get even shorter and blouses even lower….No thanks.

    Kermit finally got fed up with the inner and outer miss piggies of America,hopped away and gave them the double flipper.Real men are back!!

    The average woman of America is an abomination.

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