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7 Tips For Discussing Relationship Problems Without Creating Drama

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I have my problems with keeping my cool during relationship conversations; let’s keep it real, we all do. This article came across our view and we think it is great. Check out the post and more after the jump.

One of the universal truths of a great relationship is that the partners involved are able to communicate with one another. It’s crucial to be able to discuss things that you are less than satisfied with. Discuss. Not interrogate, finger-point or blame. This requires two people who are willing to lay it all on the line, be vulnerable, and actually listen to one another.

But so often, when we sit down to talk about these things, it turns into an issue that we brought it up in the first place and rather than solving problems, more are created. Alternatively, some people leave their problems unaddressed until one day someone loses it and/or the relationship just crumbles. Here, my friends, are 7 principles to consider for effective communication:

1. Make sure you’re in a relationship where you can talk about your problems with someone who cares enough to listen, empathize and change… or at least make an effort to. Plain and simple: if you aren’t with someone who cares enough to work on things, you’re wasting your time.

2. Approach these conversations from the perspective of,hey, I really care about you, and I care about what we have together, so I’d like to share with you some things that are bothering me so we can talk about it.Not argue about it, not ignore the problem, but talk it through. You have to make sure you communicate that you are not attacking this person, rather you care enough about them to deal with the discomfort of talking about the things that aren’t so perfect between you.

3. The environment for these conversations must be a) neutral, b) private and c) when neither of you are angry. By neutral I mean don’t talk about these things in your parent’s house where they could possibly overhear and your significant other feels obligated to act one way or another because, for God’s sake, you’re visiting your parents. Which leads me to my next point of make sure you’re in private. These conversations are nobody else’s business. Lastly, and probably most obviously, nothing good comes of a conversation where one or both of you enter fuming.

Read the rest here.

Comment(10)

  1. # 1 is key. That's the glue and foundation that hold all the rest of them together. If you don't have number one as stated above, it's a waste of your time and breath and pointless to go any further.
    If your fortunate enough to be in a relationship with a mature person then your good. If not, stick a fork in it because it's probably done.
    I agree with Constance great list.

  2. i like to know what can i do i been in a relationship with this man for 8yr an it not going good now he move back with his mom to help her out when he move out an it is my apart now an i was helping a friend our an he got mad at me beause i let him stay one night nothing was going on with him man at all him an my son was doing some work on the build he got mad i told him that nothing was going on when he get mad he bronk it back up an wont let it go help me

  3. i like to know why is it when you met someone an they do all the thing to get you an do thing for you they stop an get mad an say they are trie me same way you do for that one you want is the same way to keep her or him i need to know help me i have talk to him about it nothing have change

  4. good list, but I think it all starts with you. You have to point out your flaws as well when discussing problems, because unless the other party is absolutely totally screwing up on all ends, you have to have some share in the problems. If you come into a situation with all guns blazing and fists swinging (figuratively of course) you'll never solve any problems. But if you point out what you did as well, or some of your shortcomings then you can solve a deal of problems… just my humble opinion
    My recent post Plain And Simple…I Fcuked Up

  5. Nice points.. Loved reading it. Truly communication is the key to solve any kind of issues that arise in relationships. When a couple fails to communicate and solve the problems in their relationships, they need relationship counseling, which shows the way to understand each other well and recognize well, what is causing a troubled relationship.
    My recent post Plea to Parents: Do Just this One Thing

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