Usually the time between the NBA Finals and the start of NFL training camp is super-boring for anyone who isn’t into baseball. Instead, there were seemingly endless headlines across a variety of sports that each took their turn atop the Twitter trending topics. How else to break everything down than ranking them based on Sunday’s BET Awards?
Without any further ado, the winners are…
Paula Patton Trainwreck Award:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2ebM-iWeBg
The question isn’t if Patton was drunk, but how drunk. She stammered through her teleprompter lines before having the mic taken from her…twice. I’m not a huge fan of her acting, mostly because she acts in movies like she acted on stage: like the a-little-too-drunk friend you have to babysit when you go out. Clearly Patton is too pretty. Most other people have been shaken by the shoulders and told to “calm the f— down” at some point. Beautiful women get away with this all the time.
Her “performance” perfectly represents the Dwight Howard free agency tour. Howard, who most recently played with the Los Angeles Lakers, started the courting process by meeting with the Houston Rockets over dinner. In total, Howard will meet with about a quarter of the league before deciding where to take his talents next season. He will spend a little time with each team, declare each one his favorite afterwards, then pick a team based on who sucked up to him the most. Hopefully he figures it out soon; watching him twist in the wind for the second straight season is annoying.
Look, Mariah is one of the greatest singers ever. Can’t say that enough. But her performance was a singing shot of Nyquil. Whether she was lipsynching or not, she just…stood there giving a desert-dry performance.
Serena Williams, and almost every American tennis player in Wimbledon, have to share this award. On the Men’s side, American tennis has taken a backseat for a while. Our women have fared better recently, but Williams’ early exit might signal the tide turning on that side as well. Serena is 31, which is a relic by tennis standards. So Sloane Stevens has the juice now. Let’s see if she can reclaim some glory on our behalf.
Chris Tucker “Worst Thing Ever” Award:
I don’t think hosting an awards show is easy, and no host has proven me more right than Chris Tucker. After a decent start, Smokey slowly devolved into a dumpster fire by the show’s end. The impersonations that all sounded the same, telling us he was “wasting time,” then doing so horribly, the just-as-bad scripted jokes…all bad. Again, this is not an easy job, but Tucker seemed like he wasn’t trying about halfway into the show (probably the same time the check from BET cleared into his account).
Obviously the Aaron Hernandez murder arrest was the worst thing to happen in sports this week. This was a case so outrageous it completely overshadowed another arrest of an NFL player for attempted-murder. Since it has been covered to death, I won’t go into too many details. Whether Hernandez committed the murder of Odin Lloyd or not, it’s clear he had something to do with it. Hopefully the friends and family of Lloyd are soon able to recover emotionally. There really aren’t any positives to this story, so we’ll move on.
Badu, Good, Wilson “Best Thing Ever” Award:
Clearly this (probably NSFW), these (less SFW), and this performance (completely SFW) are the only palate cleansers for the Hernandez story. I’m glad Wilson had a chance to get some shine. The heir to Nate Dogg’s throne as “Hook Singer Extrodanaire,” Wilson led the show’s best performance of the evening. Erykah Badu and Meghan Good did what they do: sing well, walk away from the camera, and…I guess be pretty in Good’s case. All together, they easily highlighted the show.
The only sports story from the week that can stand up to these are the Blackhawks championship celebration. Working in downtown Chicago, I’m obviously biased, but it was so cool to see the entire city rally around the NHL champions. I mean, just look at this picture. If you’re a sports fan, you have to love that.
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That wraps up an eventful week in sports. What did you think of these stories and the BET Awards? Were you higher on Tucker’s work as the host than I was? What else caught your eye this Sunday?
Let me know!
This has been an awkward week for Boston, the Bruins lost the Stanley Cup in shorter time that it’ll take me to finish this comment. The Patriots went from one of the most prolific offenses so one who is depending on a rookie, a Wes Welker ringer, a star who can have his own Operation board game, and a backup qb who throws 20 yard spikes. The Red Sox are in first place but the AL east is top-bottom easily the best division in baseball, oh and the Celtics are in full #riggingforWiggins mode but honestly a Rondo, Bradley, Green, Sullinger, Olynyk, team can maybe be a 7-8 seed in the East, so this could be all for naught. And just as a final parting shot, the hometown kid went from being a consensus #1 pick, to out the top 5 and immediately traded
Oh and Chris’s monologue was fine but he seemed to run out of material by 9:30…..a Michael/50 cent joke, he probably had that one since rush hour 3
Yeah I aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalmost wrote the "Boston had the worst sports week ever" post. Because y'all definitely had the worst sports week ever.
I think you're a little high on the Celtics, but I get that. Kentavious Caldwell-Pope is going to be the next Dominique Wilkins.
Chris ran out of gas super early. All hosts have to fill time, most don't actually say "The told me to waste time…". That's so terrible, lol.
" Rondo, Bradley, Green, Sullinger, Olynyk, team can maybe be a 7-8 seed in the East"
*Reads over 2-3 more times* bwhahahaha.
you telling me that 5 is not as good as a milwaukee or cleveland
…but Cleveland sucked though. Milwaukee maybe.
*weeps for my Bucks*
Ante..Anteto… how the hell do you say his name? He sounds like an Egyptian king, not a basketball player.
Back to the damn lottery.
Not sure exactly how Cleveland creeped into being a possible 8 seed, but whatever, lmaoo. But yes, that's exactly what I'm saying. Boston was a 7 seed this PAST year and I'll go out on a limb and say that starting 5 is not as good that one that finished 7th (even without Rondo since January).
Im just curious who out of that 5 is gonna hit a jumpshot? (consistently).
Don't nobody give a damn about Boston.
I hope Boston continues to suck for eternity actually
All I have to say is this was one of the most creative ways to analyze a group of events based on 1 event. I see the genius coming out.
Thanks man. Your check is in the mail.
I just want to say that people always attack me for saying that I don't think Serena is as great as people make her out to be. She gets like mad points extra from the Black community but it ain't for nothing but they just started being up on tennis. Ain't no way that someone should be in a conversation with Steffi Graf and they can't handle the fourth round of Wimbledon and they're supposed to be the best player in the game both men and women.
It's going to take a long time before anyone regards her as one of the best female tennis players of all time and that stupid loss is a perfect example of why.
I don't think you can count this year in Wimbledon as a valid excuse for her not being one of the greats. … there was carnage all around. Nadal was out in the first round, Federer out in the second, Sharapova and Wozniacki out in the second…..Nothing went as planned for anyone involved. And Federer's the greatest man on grass since Sampras.
Also, Steffi's been bounced out of the 3rd and 4th round several times in her career, at various points in her career.
Serena Williams is going to go down as an amazing athlete, period. Not many tennis players are given that general title. That doesn't mean that Steffi's not one of the greatest tennis players of all time (I say one of because I personally give that title to Navratilova).
But if you look at the pace Serena's going at, she has a very clear shot at beating Steffi's record – especially since the gap between her and the rest of the women's field (save for 1 or 2 pros and a couple of amateurs coming up) is impossibly wide compared to the men's pool.
Oh, and Monica Seles was gonna stop Steffi dead in her tracks if it wasn't for "the incident." It still hurts me that we never saw her fully develop.
I write this all to say that I think it's valid for a discussion to be had.
A lot of what you said shows me that you watch tennis but it was mostly factually incorrect.
Steffi during her prime never lost in a Grand Slam tournament in the round play. In fact, in her entire career she has only had 4 times since she became relevant (i'm not counting her first couple years) losing in the rounds. They were all due to injury.
Serena will go down as an amazing athlete but that has more to do with her fans than her accomplishments. Also the game is much different. There isn't the same level of competition now that there was before.
Serena's pace suggest that she will NEVER come close to Steffi's Grand Slam total. Steffi doesn't even hold that record, she's second at 22.
Steffi played for 17 years, won 22 titles, and won those titles over the span of 12 years.
Serena has played 18 years, won 16 titles, and won those titles over the span of 14 years.
What about that suggests that she will catch Steffi? Steffi retired at 30. Serena is 31. It ain't happening.
Graf lost the first round of Wimbledon in 94 in straight sets. That wasn't during her prime? And Seles, her biggest competition at the time, wasn't back in tennis yet.
I think you're downplaying Serena's accomplishments. Outside of her grand slam titles, she may have the most dominant serve in history. Most powerful two-handed backhand in history. She took extended hiatuses from the game and came back and dominated, over 3 years of that was due to injury. Graf did the same but was never sidelined for as long, both in individual stints as well as cumulatively. (Which to me impies the Serena has played for less, but I won't argue that)
Serena has a good 3 years left. 30 isn't the ceiling anymore. That's what makes it possible, because as you said, the competition now isn't what it was before.
However, that doesn't devalue Serena's accomplishments. While the gap is wide now, Serena took a long time to rise to the top, as opposed to Steffi (she always had rivals, but she was established as the cream of the crop early) ; she fought against the era of Martina Hingis, Jennifer Capriati, Clijsters…she wasn't even considered the best of the two sisters for years. And now she stands far above the rest of them, which yes is partially due to the lack of power players, but also due to her slow rise to dominance.
That lost in Wimbledon was because she was injured. I already addressed that.
If you think she's going to win 7 more grand slams, that's just crazy. If it happens, i'll be shocked. Like completely shocked. That would be some feat.
She wasn't injured in Wimbledon 1994. She came in injury-free planning to reassert herself after getting embarrassed in the French open semifinals.
"Seemingly free of injury for the first time in years … In the Hamburg final, she lost for the first time in 1994 after 36 consecutive match victories, losing to Sánchez Vicario in three sets. She then won her eighth German Open, but there were signs that her form was worsening as she almost lost to Julie Halard in a quarterfinal.Back-to-back losses followed; Graf lost to Mary Pierce in a French Open semifinal, 6–2, 6–2, and followed that with a first-round straight-sets loss at Wimbledon to Lori McNeil, her first loss in a first round Grand Slam tournament in ten years. Graf still managed to win San Diego the following month but aggravated a long-time back injury in beating Sánchez Vicario in the final. She then began to wear a back brace and was unsure about playing the US Open but elected to play while receiving treatment and stretching for two hours before each match. She made it to the final and took the first set there against Sánchez Vicario—Sanchez Vicario's last victory over Graf. Her back injury, however, flared up and she lost the next two sets."
You're trolling right now.
1) Nobody will tell you that Serena is better or more dominant than Steffi. Maybe in a few years… but not now.
2) This is really about Serena.
3) Serena should be compared to people who have the same or around the same accomplishments as her.
1) I don't think having counterpoints equals trolling. You said she's overrated, I disagreed, hence the discussion.
2)Show me where I said that Serena was better than Steffi today. I said its a valid discussion to have, again because you said that Serena is overrated.
3) I believe the US Open comes after Wimbledon… Graf did a whole promo tour claiming she was ready to retake Wimbledon, which made the loss all the more embarrassing. The Wimbledon and French open losses were never attributed to injury.
But you got it. This back and forth doesn't pay my bills, and all I wanted to point out was that when you look at the totality of Serena's accomplishments, past, present, and future trajectory, and contributions to both the singles and doubles game, she has a right to be discussed in the greats conversation.
*goes back to making July 4th BBQ plans*
Seles didn't challenge Graf, she may have just been a close second if that… the rivalry turned out to be 10-5 in favor of Steffi. Most people wouldn't call that a rivalry. Monica barely won.
The truth is you can name three women's tennis players better, greater and more dominant than Serena based on facts. I can name five men too. However, everyone wants to put her in this top 3 conversation and it's undeserving. Let her be what she is.
We never got to see Seles fully mature with her precision til the end. She brought pure physicality, but it took her a while to get to her peak. My point was, just as she was starting to get into her stride as a dominating force, that was cut short. The stabbing happened in '93. They were 6-4 (Graf) then.
I think its to fair to have the conversation because it seems clear that Serena's not done yet. We're not talking about if her career ended right now. We're discussing if she continues on this trajectory for another 4-5 years, which seems a lot more plausible as we see her perform. (especially if she continues to take well-timed breaks).
The only thing I quibble with people about is how Serena "changed" the game. She wasn't the first female player to bring more physicality than finesse to the game. However, her level of power may be unparalleled, especially when it comes to her serve and two-handed backhand.
Said it way better than I ever could have. +100000
Believe the hype. Serena is/will be on the short list of all time greats when she's done.
She is not the greatest tho.
Short list. I didn't say GOAT.
Lmaoooo! @ this whole thread. I don't even understand the real debate. Fine, she's not better then Steffi Graf….and she will go down as one of the best female tennis players when it's all over said and done with. AmI missing anything else?? lol
My facebook newsfeed was split between Paula being drunk or high on cocaine. But, my entire newsfeed was in complete agreement with the fact that she was flying on something, LOL!
Erykah's stank walk made me take notes. The Adventist conference is calling a board meeting sometime soon about the Pastor's wife, lol…I'd put MONEY on that. And, that Charlie Wilson performance was pretty awesome. Pharrell WON'T AGE!!!! And JT had some pretty footwork.
That Reggae set was HOT too! A first that shouldn't have taken so long to happen.
On the note about Pharrell. He's clearly drinking the blood of infants like a vampire to stay that young. Took a hilarious quiz online…can you guess which Pharrell is older? Lol
I actually got 7/8.
Link: http://www.vulture.com/2013/06/quiz-which-pharrel…
HA! I got a 7/8 too…just got the first one wrong, LMBO!
Just did it and got #4 wrong. wow! lol 7/8
Paula Patton is a good example of how pretty women get away with anything.
I just think Robin Thicke should have went up there and dragged his wife off the stage.
Badu. Good. Pretty much all I needed to see of the BET Awards.
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LOL I love the way you wrote this post Joe!!!
Paula… damn man… Where was Robin… Poor girl was high!
If D12 doesn't take a decision very soon, I'm flying to LA to help him pack his stuffs, I can't believe we are begging him… I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THESE BANNERS!!!
As a dancehall dancer, the reggae set gave me life… LOVED IT!!! They brought back the oldies, i had to call my mom LOL!
I want my ass to be like Badu's when I'll be her age! Megan ALWAYS looks good and she seems like a very nice person (just like Paula, she can't act though just saying!)
What's the debate about Serena?… I don't get it… She's one of the best… I don't think that statement is arguable… Anyway I just love her because the way she speaks french is so cute!!! I won't lie I'm more into male tennis.
And yeah 3/8 on that Pharrell's quiz, I kind of suck -_-'! lol!
The Graf and Serena argument is like that of Tiger and Nicklaus. it is difficult to judge who is better overall, for one reason alone. time. that said, competition also plays a part….I would want to insist that even though graf won a lot of tournaments, her competition pool is nowhere near serena's and there a myriad of reason's for that….better facilities, sports nutrition and so forth. the bottom line is that each generation has its star and serena is this generations star regardless of whether she gets 22 or more…much like federer and nadal will be as compared to sampras. The critics actually think that serena by this time should have been close to graf than she is, much like tiger should be to nicklaus
Perhaps I should invest in getting cable again so that I am able to watch such spectacularly entertaining programming. Witnessing Erykah Badu's @ss is worth the $100/month price tag alone.
*thinks about it*
Nah. Youtube will give me all I need. lol.
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