I read a tweet recently that said “too many people get being in love confused with being comfortable.”
There are some times where I’ll scroll down my timeline and one liners will stop me in my tracks. That tweet was one of them. Everything I will say in this post I pretty much thought of within minutes of reading that quote. There should be a clear distinction made here. We could all be better off being reminded of this from time to time.
We’re creatures of habit.
It is natural to become comfortable in our relationships, or situationships. When you love someone, comfort and love can become synonymous. It can be synonymous in your thought process, but in reality it isn’t synonymous at all. To be specific, when I mention being comfortable, I’m referring to being complacent. You should absolutely be comfortable with who you’re with. Being complacent with your partner is detrimental.
Love is an emotion and it’s also a verb.
Love and complacency can’t coexist for long. They always clash. How many times have you asked someone why they’re still with someone even when they’re not happy? They usually say they love their partner. When this is said, I’m quite sure one of the participants in the relationship aren’t being an active member. Love elicits action. Think of how you are when you’re in love. All you want to do is make your partner happy. You’d like to make their day easier, see them smile, etc.
Love elicits action.
This action should be mutual. Too many people stay in shitty situations because they’re comfortable. No acts of love are present anymore. Some people stay in these relationships for fear of starting over. People aren’t willing to be vulnerable to rejection again. To that point, I say you have a decision to make.
You can always choose to stay in a lackluster relationship. I would like to challenge you to not live life simply going through the motions. When you’re in love, you should feel the most alive. If you’re not excited to be with who you’re with, and they don’t bring you the vitality you deserve, then you need to end things. Life is short. That means we need to minimize our disappointments and miscues.
Being complacent will leave you feeling unfulfilled.
You don’t deserve that. What we all deserve is to be able to smile til our face hurts as often as possible. There are too many other things in life that leave us bogged down, your his or her should not be one of them.
Today, I challenge you to be the love you’d like to feel. Challenge your partner to do the same. If they’re not with, then tell them you have two words for them… I’m out. Take control of your life and happiness because it’s really all you’ve got.
These are my words and I make no apologies.
DamnPops is a writer on the staff at SBM : “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others. ” Brooklyn born dude trying to figure out this life just like you. Come on this journey with me. Follow me on Twitter @DamnPOPS
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