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How to Take a Woman Out on a Proper Date


A woman tells men how to take a woman out on a proper date, since it seems alot of fellas have lost their way with the romanticism, you need a fresh reminder every once and awhile.

It starts by actually asking me out. Please call me up on the phone, or if we are talking in person, ask me then. I will accept a text message asking me out, but it knocks you down a few points. Let’s review the proper way to ask a woman on a date. “Wanna hang out?” is NOT a proper way to ask me on a date, nor is it a proper date.

Most likely I will respond to this with a big “No.” “Brooklyn, can I take you out this week?” Or better yet, “Brooklyn, can I take you to dinner Friday night?” If you are awesome, you’ll say, “Brooklyn, I’d like to take you on an adventure. When is the best time for you?”

To any of these three proposals, I’d likely say, “Absolutely!” Now, I’m not saying drop everything, ladies, but if you are asked on a proper date, say yes! Unfortunately, it takes balls these days to actually ask a girl out.

Now, gentlemen, when you ask me out on a proper date, that means you pick me up at my house, knock on my door and escort me to wherever it is we are going. Please open doors for me. I dressed up for you. You can show me some manners if you’re really trying to impress.

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Of course I can open my own doors. Heck, I can change my own oil! That is not the point. I am a lady on a date. Treat me as a woman. The age-old question of who should pay is awkward for the first few months for every couple. Guys, I am sorry but the burden falls on you.

You asked me out, so as your guest, you should pay for me. I won’t reach for my purse, but I will make sure to thank you before, during and after. I will always send a thank you text or call the next day. Ladies, appreciation goes a long way with a man. Do not forget that, ever!

A more casual date is allowed if you are meeting a woman for the first time, as in a dating app/site first meeting or a blind date. Obviously, do not ever allow a complete stranger to pick you up from where you live. But boys, after casual outings once or twice, if you like the girl take her out on a proper date.

[Read more at EliteDaily]


  1. I call BS on this one. She's met up with a guy at an afterwork, lunch or brunch before…men have wised up over the past few years.

  2. I don't think it's wrong to meet at a neutral point to go out on any date. Getting picked up is cool, might not always be the most practical though. But I can dig the list.

  3. It's 2013 man. The technology that exists today exists for a reason. Nothing wrong with a text or a DM if you don't have her number yet lol

      1. DMs and texts have gotten me very far in life. I've learned a lot actually, it's called using technology and the resources available to you lol

  4. I have to be honest. I was sitting here, gun cocked, ready to shoot all types of holes in this post. I was sure it was going to get materialistic with what kind of place and how much money constitutes a proper date. But to tell the truth I liked it. I agree with what she had to say. Now I will add, just like DamnPops said, there isn't necessarily something wrong with meeting at a neutral spot. It possible that the situation might call for that. But all in all these is actually good advice in my opinion. Texting a woman, "You wanna hang out?" is kinda weak and cowardly.

  5. "The age-old question of who should pay is awkward for the first few months for every couple. Guys, I am sorry but the burden falls on you. You asked me out, so as your guest, you should pay for me. I won’t reach for my purse, but I will make sure to thank you before, during and after. I will always send a thank you text or call the next day. Ladies, appreciation goes a long way with a man. Do not forget that, ever!"

    That's all I ask for. I'm a traditionalist, so I naturally pay for a first date. But if I'm expected to "be the man" and pay, I expect her to "be the woman" and express gratitude for my actions, my time and my interest in her, even if at the end of the date, we realize we are not compatible.

  6. Ahh, the proper date. I can dig the romanticized appeal of the proper date. The long lost courting ritual and mating dance between gentlemen and ladies. Notice I said, ‘gentlemen’ and ‘ladies’ and not man and woman. And it is here my friends, where the rub lies.

    It is pesky sense of entitlement that will always could sound reasoning.

    Generally speaking, just because you are a woman, it doesn’t automatically make you a lady, and likewise the man when it comes to being considered a gentleman. Those terms should be earned and are reserved for individuals who have demonstrated an aptitude for exhibiting such behavior consistently. It is only when one has earned such a consideration, that they shall then be privy to receive such ‘proper’ treatment as described above. To believe otherwise would be a rather audacious expectation, no?

    Again, this same principle applies to men as it pertains to them having to EARN the royal treatment from women. Bottom line, you (no one) ain’t owed sh*t. Not all fish are the same, so one would be a fool to operate with zero discernment and willingly pay premium on everything without first identifying what sort of fish has actually been caught.

    Now should a woman indeed exhibit lady (not ladylike not lady’ish) but truly redeeming LADY qualities, then by all means, lavish her in traditional romanticized courtship rituals accompanied by romantic gestures. After all, in your eyes she has proven and earned such ‘proper’ treatment with her behavior and character during the time you have gotten to know her.

    I dig the letter, but I feel it has missed its audience. If you are to evoke change among individuals, the onus is not on the shoulders of the beneficiaries, but rather the benefactors -the one’s who are funding (read enabling) such behaviors by rewarding individuals with benefits that should have been otherwise labored for. Both men and women are guilty of this albeit in different forms of currency (cash and @ss).

    Anyway, this post makes a broad leap in presuming that men have forgotten how to be gentlemen. I beg to differ. I find that men (generally speaking) know very well how to be gentlemen and romantic. What has changed is the value attached to such behaviors. Among the brotherhood, such idealized romantic gestures has increased tenfold in value and are no longer shelled out willy-nilly to anything with heels and a vajayjay. Such gestures are seemingly reserved for women who have earned them. Women whom these men feel qualify to receive such benefits. How do I know? Well, they are typically given titles of ‘girlfriend’ or ‘wife’.

    Mr. SoBo OpinionatedMale.com

    My recent post: Going Natural For Life Or Fashion? Why We Love Black Women Who Love Their Hair

    My other post: Escapades Of A Nymphomaniac

    1. Well that was astute stuff in that final paragraph. I'm sure we've all written some posts that echoed those same sentiments.

      1. I'm not sure what post you read, but this post is clearly intended for the male audience. This is perfectly fine.

        However, the post is rooted in presumption and entitlement and ignores the screening process men employ when meeting/dating/courting women. My response merely points this out.
        I agree that the onus is on a man to identify and determine who is worth his time, but isn't that what dating is meant to accomplish? That said, it is audacious to expect someone to pull out all the stops for someone he is only making an attempt to learn more about face to face.

        I thought it was a great article, and everything stated in it I agree with, but only under the condition that once a man has spent enough time telephonically or otherwise getting to know this woman to determine the role she will play for him relationship wise. Otherwise, it's just simping. And last I heard, that aint easy.

        Mr. SoBo

        1. You’re right about the audience. My apologies. I meant to portray that the article was written by a woman on the behalf of all women, which means that she can have all if the expectations that she wants. If we assumed that all women were ladies then there should be no rebuttal. In the end, if women treat men like gentlemen from the jump, men treat women like ladies, then we wouldn’t have the “war against opposite” that is so prevalent today.

          I don’t get to know every female that I take out. I took out plenty of females on the fly. I consistently treated all of them the same on the first date: opened doors, paid the bill, pulled out chairs, [whatever]. It doesn’t make me a simp because first and foremost, I had my own agenda in mind. Second, I treat women with respect as I know it and hope that they follow suite. When I feel that they are totally the opposite—“takers” instead of mutual givers–I cut em’ back. Simping would be giving without receiving and allowing women to continue being selfish and inconsiderate “just because.”

    2. Thanks I've been saying this forever! Women who get the queen treatment should have a title! Not just because we date/hangout/smash entitlement and complacency everytime!

  7. "I am a lady on a date. Treat me as a woman."

    You don't deserve special treatment just because you were born with a vag.

    Dudes need to stop feeding these chicks and let them do some cooking. They need to bring something to the table besides an extra X chromosome.

      1. That's exactly it!!! As Men, we have to PROVE we are worth special treatment. Otherwise we get treated like everybody else– neutrally, politely, averagely.

        If you want *special* treatment, you better show and prove why you're worth it. And that goes for men AND women.

        See what I mean about women being entitled out the gate, yall? I blame our educational system with its woman teachers teaching boys to "be nice to girls" instead of treating people based on the value they provide.


  8. This article is implying that men has truly lost his way when it comes to dating, but this does not address the fact that women destroyed chivalry. This article does lists out what the men is expected to do and its clear that men bears the burden of the embarrassment of getting shot down and initiating everything. The average woman don't know how to be a lady nowadays and they are not even held accountable for it. But the men are held accountable for not doing what this article recommends. So men are suppose to do all this even when the woman has feminist values (self proclaimed independence, the "I don't need a man mentality", the "I can pay for my own, do this and do that probably better than you, but you have to do it cause you a man" mentality)?
    If you see these type of women with these types of feminine values, what is the point of chivalry? Do you actually think you will get a genuine "thank you?" For some yes, but there is a decent percentage that won't. Bottom line is that you can't expect a man to act like it's 1950 who the woman is acting like it's 2013. Times have changed!
    If a man asks you out, he should pay because he asks you out. But if a chick asks me out, I do pay sometimes, but that should NOT be my burden. Just sayin……

    1. Precisely.

      The old, 'having your cake and eat it too'. Holding men to the standards of yesteryear, yet if a man holds women to those standards of yesteryear he is labeled a misogynist. A chauvinist. The patriarchal bane of society and its ills.

      I guess women are the only ones allowed to 'progress' while our manhood remains steadfastly measured by how fast we can take out the garbage, pull out chairs and pick up the tab. I'm actually cool with that, only if she is able to and happy to prepare delicious meals, wash, iron, fold and clean like a truly independent adult is supposed to know how to do.

      Mr SoBo

      My recent post Escapades of a Nymphomaniac

  9. What's sad is this isn't all implied, if I ask a girl out I would want an immediate answer and obviously a yes…a text or a wanna do something isn't assuring me either result. The nail hit on the head is appreciation, just because I asked YOU out doesn't mean I couldn't ask HER or someone else, don't act as though you're doing me a favor. Impression goes both ways, dress up, and if I called to ask you out, I would like at least expect to hear your voice thanking me for the company and whatever else I paid for.
    My recent post Today’s Word is… INTEREST

    1. "I would like at least expect to hear your voice thanking me for the company and whatever else I paid for. "

      Manners and etiquette are forgotten arts in the United States these days.

  10. See hardly any comments from the ladies on this one. So as long as its only our feet getting held to the fire, you're ready to be the "amen" corner. Now that some true "equality" is being expounded upon, you can hear crickets from the feminine side of the aisle. SMDH!


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