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4 Ways Being 30 Has Ruined My Sports Fandom


keep calm 30

30. I’m behind on all the goals I had for myself at this age when I was a kid.

I was supposed to be a billionaire, astronaut, NBA player (point guard for the Pistons, #1 draft pick of course), Sportscenter anchor, and music mogul. Not a rapper, more like Diddy. Just talk shit on other rappers’ records and show up at every awards show.

Oh and 6’5. I was supposed to be 6’5.

All things considered, I’m not doing too bad. I have a hot wife and all my bills are paid. Still working on my first billion.

On my 30th birthday weekend, I, like many, became reflective. This age means a lot to people, but all I could think about was how it has ruined various aspects of my sports fandom. For all of you that are 30+, walk with me. For those of you under 30, I hate you. Get out.

Here’s what I’ve noticed about being 30:

Little things make me feel very old, very quickly –

Do you know Bradley Beal? He’s a second-year guard for the Washington Wizards. He also wore #23. Pretty much everyone my age who wore 23 is a douche did so as homage to Michael Jordan. For most people, he’s the greatest player ever, and his shoes still cause riots when they release.

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Beal is 20 years old. He wore 23 growing up, but decided to switch numbers when he was drafted to Washington. He recently revealed that he wore his original number as a tribute to LeBron James.

I…I just…I can’t believe how old that makes me feel.

LeBron is younger than me! And a current NBA player grew up idolizing him. Excuse me while I ice my knee and ponder this.

And while we’re on the subject…

My Hoop Dreams are officially dead –


I mean, I knew I wasn’t making the NBA when I couldn’t make the team in college (fresh off a 5-22 record by the way). So this shouldn’t have come as a complete surprise. But childhood dreams die hard.

I’ve played basketball forever, and even wrote a post about the pickup players we all hate to see (that was clearly stolen by these guys). Anyway, every basketball fanatic who had a shred of talent always feels about 30 pounds away from a fairytale shot at the D-League. It took Ben Wallace a while to make it, why not me?

But after realizing that there are current players who grew up watching current players that are younger than me? Yeah. Dream deferred. My hoop dreams are now a raisin in the sun.

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What in the world have I been doing? –

I shifted gears somewhere in grad school and thought about cracking into sports through a front office position. While that dream is still very much in front of me, there are reminders of my decrepitness everywhere.

At 29, Theo Epstein was appointed General Manager of the Boston Red Sox.

At 28, some guy names Shane Kupperman is Director of Basketball Operations for the New Orleans Pelicans.

The list goes on.

I swear I’ve been doing something the past eight years since college, but I’m definitely on the “slow and steady” plan made popular by the Tortoise. This was not how I originally laid it out.

Tweets like this start to make sense –

Just kidding. I’ll never be that lame.

Now that I feel roughly 100 years old, how about you? Does your age affect how you look at sports? Please, make me feel better about this. Hit the comments!


  1. Always putting out that heat Joe!!! Man, reading this made me feel so old. As a Washington, DC resident I never knew that about Neal. Man, I am definitely old..lol I was just talking to some friends the other day how I didn't know Jermaine O'Neal was still in the NBA and I remember seeing him play basketball as a freshman and sophmore in High School. Atleast we can say we have seen the greatest (MJ and Lebron) both play in their primes.

    1. Thanks man.

      It's amazing about guys like Jermaine O'Neal. Really feel like I've known them forever…and they are 13-14 year vets in the league!

      Really cool we got to see Jordan and LeBron in their primes. Definitely a silver lining to being of this generation.

  2. I’m 25 that cutoff age when everyone drafted will be younger than u, except Brandon weeden. I can’t rock a jabari parker jersey, he started high school when I finished college

    1. Yep…throwbacks from here on out for us, lol. Just can't wear the jersey of a guy younger than me. At some point I'll get that Pistons Isiah jersey. Can't get a Dumars. We look too much alike.

  3. Once i realised Anthony (The Brow) Davis, who was on the 2012 Redeem Team…never saw the Original Dream Team (1992) live..only on video…

    that's when i knew i was old. lol.

  4. The minute I meet one of the young ballers in the league Im like "SHIT".


    Son, just age like fine wine. dont even think that in 3 years you'll probably be older than 80% of the league

  5. I instantly feel old when they ask current NBA players who they have on their pre-game playlists and 90% of the artists they name, I'm like "who". Young kids w/ their rappity rap and $300 personalized headphones. It's definitely weird when current college players name Bron, Wade, and CP3 as their idols. I'll stay in my lane w/ Vince Carter, Kobe, and Dirk.

    On the football side though, I'm surprised how old (as opposed to young) certain players are. I be like wait "he was drafted when…?"

    My recent post You Have To Be Selfish To Network Successfully

    1. You know what this reminded me of weirdly? You notice the basketball/football recruits that are named Shaquille? You know what this means right?


  6. LeBron is our age. He turns 30 in December. He was only a year behind us in high school. That's how old LeBron is. That's why that hair line is steadily trying to run away haha. We are getting up there bro. I felt old at the cape henry alumni game when basically all the guys that played I coached once upon a time… and I was the only person to really stretch before that game. I'm not getting hurt for nobody haha. We'll be 40 before you know it, but we'll still be some Cool Capricorns 🙂

  7. I hit that 30 stage almost four years ago and have pretty much been a “get off my lawn” card carrying member ever since. I can’t even listen to half of music that’s out now without a O_o look on my face…but this generation may not be as lost as us 80s babies think.

    The other night at work, I walked into the office and a cat I work with (under 25) had a Wu-Tang Pandora station playing, with G-Funk station cued up next. What does it mean? Probably not much, but at least 1 90s baby knows good music.

  8. Im a 90s baby (1990) and i was in Middle school growing up idolizing LeBron and Jordan(on the Wizards) never seen him play for the Bulls. I get what you're saying but its just our (90s babies) time to emerge now


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