Blurred gender roles are a norm in today’s day and age.
Most of us want equality for both sexes in all facets of life. Ideally, this would be the case. The truth is that for this to be, there will be some resistance in some instances. For instance we have today’s subject of marriage proposal. Now some of us may feel that a woman proposing to a man would be tacky. Some simply thing that it isn’t right. We’ll explore this today whether it be in this post or in the comments. But the bottom line is that this here lies the same “what’s good for the goose” ideology. If men can propose to women, so should a woman propose to a man.
Will this ever be an “in” thing to do?
I’m not sure; what I can give you all, my SBM faithful is my views on it. Heading to brunch this past Sunday I was talking to my boy about this. I told him that serious couples discuss things like marriage and their futures together. To me, if a couple discusses their future together then a woman should feel confident enough to know that one day her man will propose. Whether or not a woman is patient enough to wait is another question.
Of course another question that arises is how long is too long to wait? I really don’t know. Different people have different levels of patience. My patience threshold is pretty solid. This also depends on circumstance and the personalities involved. I’ve seen people get engaged and married within a calendar year; and stay married. I have also seen couples be married for thirty plus years and still see it fail. So there’s obviously more than one way to skin a cat. When it comes to proposals you can argue there’s no right or wrong way. I say that in regards to who proposes.
I actually dated a woman a while back who said that she would entertain the idea of proposing to a man.
I was shocked to say the least. She was a bit of a go getter. My guess is that maybe more extroverted women are open to proposing to a man. What I did find interesting was a study that I read on menshealth.com. It said that 83% of men won’t wear a “man-gagement” ring. So the majority of us fellas aren’t into this idea basically.
Why am I not into it? I’m a forward thinking cat. I believe in being creative and pushing envelopes. I believe in challenging thoughts and the whole shabang. Strangely enough, I’m still a bit of a traditionalist. I think the proposal process is the time for a guy to be supremely romantic. There’s not another day where a woman should imagine being swept off her feet any better. A woman proposing to us robs us of our creativity for such a special moment. That’s just me.
The photo above is a picture I think many of us in our community have seen.
There’s actually an instagram video to go along with it. It was filled with supporters as you can see. But to many of us we just saw it as left field. I felt slightly uncomfortable watching it. It wasn’t gross in the least. It just seemed so different. The whole idea of a man going down on one knee is to show that humility and vulnerability at least once. The one time to say hey “bae, you got it.” It’s that woman’s turn to be in this position to really make this guy’s world. As a man I don’t even know how to receive a woman getting down on one knee for me. I might just pick her ass up to be completely honest with you. Let me handle the proposal, you choose the drapes for the reception…deal?
What’s your views on female marriage proposals? Why are you for or against it?
Also, please vote the Single Black Male and my blog post series called The Valentine’s Day Chronicles. I’m nominated for blog post series of the year with the Black Weblog Awards. Vote here for me, I could really use your help. I thank you all in advance.
These are my words and I make no apologies.
DamnPops is a writer on the staff at SBM: “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others. ” Brooklyn born dude trying to figure out this life just like you. Come on this journey with me. Follow me on Twitter @DamnPOPS