Yeah Yeah, Duke Won…But I’m Still Getting These Jokes Off! Hater’s Post!
Ok, look…that was a great game.
However, I can’t let this moment go without spreading more hate for Duke.
Seriously, f*ck Duke. Here’s why:
All the Black dudes on Duke’s team have the same haircut.
And that’s super corny. Like one of them learned how to cut hair and they all just go to him because it’s free.
Should be enough said, but if you need more…
He kinda looks like a rat.
He also kinda looks like Hitler.
He lost in the first round to Mercer.
Somehow when he recruits one-and-done players, it’s adapting, but when John Calipari does it, it’s shady.
Grayson Allen. The next Great White Hype.
Allen played just well enough to join a prestigious list:
White Duke Superstars That are Super Polarizing –
Jon Scheyer(‘s face)
JJ Redick Again
Austin Rivers (eh, close enough)
Congrats, Grayson. You are in rare company.
Truly awful. Quietly one of the most hate-able players on the team.
Somehow Duke represents White Privilege.
This one is hard to put my finger on, but if you hate Duke…you know what I mean.
They touched on this in the Fab Five documentary and I Hate Christian Laettner. For whatever reason, Duke University has the feeling of “people who didn’t get into Princeton, but act like they go to Princeton.”
You know how Carlton went to ULA instead of an Ivy League school on Fresh Prince of Bel-Air?
ULA could’ve been Duke.
You know what I mean?
Anyway, I feel better now.
What about you? Why do YOU hate Duke? Come join the Player Hater’s Ball in the comments below!